[Illustration: _TRAINING-SCHOOL FOR LADIES_]
[Illustration: _ABOUT TO APPEAR AT COURT._]
[Illustration: _THE OPERA._--No. I.
_Lizzy._ "GOOD GRACIOUS SELINA! LOOK THERE! THERE'S THAT RIDICULOUS
LITTLE MAN AGAIN. DID YOU EVER SEE ANYTHING SO ABSURD?"]
[Illustration: _THE OPERA._--No. II.
_Busby_. "AH THERE SHE IS, BLESS HER! AND LOOKING THIS WAY TOO. OH!
IT'S AS CLEAR AS POSSIBLE SHE HAS TAKEN A FANCY TO ME!"]
[Illustration: _THE BEST RUN OF THE SEASON._--No. I.
_Master_ (_with pumped-out Horse_). "CONFOUND THAT RASCALLY BOY! WHERE
CAN HE HAVE GOT TO WITH MY SECOND HORSE?"]
[Illustration: _THE BEST RUN OF THE SEASON._--No. II.
_Rascally Boy_ (_with delightfully fresh animal_). "OH, DEAR! WHAT A
BEAUTIFUL THING! _I WONDER WHERE MASTER CAN BE?_"]
[Illustration: _A BLACK INDIGNITY._
_Lady of the House._ "OH, THOMAS! HAVE THE GOODNESS TO TAKE UP SOME
COALS INTO THE NURSERY!"
_Thomas._ "H'M, MA'AM! IF YOU ASK IT AS A FAVOUR, MA'AM, I DON'T SO
MUCH OBJECT; BUT I 'OPE YOU DON'T TAKE ME FOR AN 'OUSEMAID, MA'AM!"]
[Illustration: _ART-PROGRESS._
_Artist(!)._ "NOW, MUM! TAKE ORF YER 'EAD FOR SIXPENCE, OR YER 'OLE
BODY FOR A SHILLIN'!"]
[Illustration: _FRATERNITY._
_Fred._ (_affectionately taking the arm of his friend_ HARRY--_as he
thinks_). "OH! DO LOOK AT THESE BEAUTIFUL DIAMONDS. HOW WELL THEY WOULD
BECOME YOUR SWEET SISTER!"
_Coal-heaver._ "COME NOW! WALKER!"]
[Illustration: _PRIVATE OPINION._
_Little Shrimpton._ "HAH! THEY MAY LAUGH! BUT I MEAN TO SAY THAT THE
BEARD IS A GREAT ORNAMENT, AND GIVES DIGNITY TO THE HUMAN FIGURE!"]
[Illustration: _THE OLD OLD STORY._
IT WAS IN AUGUST OR SEPTEMBER, WE FORGET WHICH, THAT AMELIA'S SCARF
CAUGHT HENRY'S BUTTON, AND NOW--THEY ARE MARRIED. WASN'T IT ODD?]
[Illustration: _THE BEARD MOVEMENT._
"HOLLO, 'ENERY! IS THAT YOU? WHY I HARDLY KNOW'D YER WITH THAT GREAT
BEARD!"]
[Illustration: _VARIETIES IN HORSE-TAMING._--No. I.
OLD MR. B. HAS FOUND OUT THAT THE OIL OF RHODIUM SYSTEM IS ALL
NONSENSE, AND HAS BEEN INITIATED BY MR. RAREY. WHENEVER HE GETS SPILT,
AND LOSES HIS HAT (AS HE DID THE VERY LAST DAY OF THE SEASON), HE JUST
SAYS TO HIS HORSE, "FETCH IT, OLD BOY!" AND THE THING IS DONE!]
[Illustration: _VARIETIES IN HORSE-TAMING._--No. II.
OUR DEAR OLD FRIEND BRIGGS--HAVING TAKEN THE RECEIPT FOR HORSE-TAMING
FROM THE PAPERS--TRIES SOME EXPERIMENTS UPON AN ANIMAL THAT HE HAS
PICKED UP A BARGAIN.]
[Illustration: _AN INCIDENT OF WEIGHT._
_Cabby._ "LET YER OUT?--THAT'S A GOOD UN!--NOT AFORE YOU PAYS FOR
BREAKING MY SPRINGS!"]
[Illustration: _ASTOUNDING ANNOUNCEMENT._
_Maid._ "PLEASE, MA'AM, MR. SKEWER SAYS HE'S A-GOING TO KILL _HISSELF_
THIS WEEK, AND WILL YOU HAVE A JOINT?"]
[Illustration: _A VERY SHOCKING BOY, INDEED!_
_Mamma._ "NOW, SIR--IF YOU DON'T BEHAVE BETTER, I WILL TELL PAPA OF
YOU, AND HE WILL BOX YOUR EARS!"
_Shocking Boy._ "WELL, THEN, GO! MARCH!! AND SHUT THE DOOR AFTER
YOU!!!"]
[Illustration: _A FADED YOUTH._
_Hostess._ "NOW, MY DEAR--WILL YOU COME AND DANCE A QUADRILLE?"
_Juvenile._ "THA-A-NK YOU--IT'S SO MANY YEARS AGO SINCE I DANCED, THAT
I WOULD RATHER BE EXCUSED, IF YOU PLEASE. IN FACT, I--AW, I HAVEN'T
DANCED SINCE I WAS QUITE A BOY."]
[Illustration: _IN THE PARK._
_First Man_ (_Home for the Holidays_). "AWFUL BIT OF GERANIUM THAT,
CHARLEY!"
_Second Ditto._ "YA-AS, I WAS ALWAYS VERY FOND OF FLOWERS--AW--THEY
LOOK SO JOLLY INNOCENT!"]
[Illustration: _IN THE STREETS._
THESE YOUNG GENTLEMEN ARE NOT INDULGING IN THE FILTHY HABIT OF
SMOKING.--THEY ARE ONLY CHEWING TOOTHPICKS, THE COMFORTING AND ELEGANT
PRACTICE NOW SO MUCH IN VOGUE.]
[Illustration: _CRINOLINE AGAIN._
_Charles._ "CONFOUND THE HOOPS, JUST WHEN I WANT TO MAKE MY NEAT SPEECH
ABOUT BEING '_NEARER AND DEARER_' TOO!"]
[Illustration: _A HINT TO MAMMAS._
_First Nursemaid._ "LAWK, MARIER! WHAT A BEE-UTIFLE GOWND!"
_Second Do._ "MY! JANE! HAIN'T IT?"
[ _They contemplate the Gownd for about a quarter of an hour, and the
Children have the full benefit of the delicious North-East Wind._
]
[Illustration: _THE ROUND HAT._
1. WHEN IT IS ALL VERY WELL. 2. WHEN IT IS OBJECTIONABLE. 3. WHEN THE
POLICE OUGHT TO INTERFERE.]
[Illustration: _TAKING IT EASY._
JOHN THOMAS, AS HE APPEARED WHILE HIS MISSUS WAS IN THE BOTANICAL
GARDENS. J. T. IS CONSULTING HIS BETTING BOOK. (A POSITIVE FACT.)]
[Illustration: _PROFESSIONAL DIGNITY._
_Lady._ "RESIGN YOUR SITUATION! WHY, WHAT'S WRONG NOW, THOMAS? HAVE
THEY BEEN WANTING YOU TO EAT SALT BUTTER AGAIN?"
_Genteel Footman._ "OH, NO, THANK YOU, MA'AM--BUT THE FACT IS,
MA'AM--THAT I HAVE HEARD THAT MASTER WERE SEEN LAST WEEK ON THE TOP
OF A HOMNIBUS, AND I COULDN'T AFTER THAT REMAIN ANY LONGER IN THE
FAMILY!"]
[Illustration: _NEVER CARRY YOUR GLOVES IN YOUR HAT._
MR. POFFINGTON FLATTERS HIMSELF HE IS CREATING A SENSATION--(_Perhaps
he is._)]
[Illustration: _ACADEMIC COSTUME._
_Dr. Bear._ "PUT ON YOUR GOWN, SIR."
_Undergraduate._ "GOT IT ON, SIR!"]
[Illustration: _MORE NOVELTY._
THE MISSES WEASEL THINK CRINOLINE A PREPOSTEROUS AND EXTRAVAGANT
INVENTION, AND APPEAR AT MRS. ROUNDABOUT'S PARTY IN A SIMPLE AND
ELEGANT ATTIRE.]
[Illustration: _FROM THE MINING DISTRICTS._
"MARTHA, WAST 'E DONE WI' THE MILK?"
"GEEN IT TO THE SHILD."
"DANG THE SHILD, THEE SHOULD HA' GEEN IT TO TH' BULL PUP!"]
[Illustration: _A DISTURBER OF PUBLIC PEACE._
_Rioter._ "I SAY, OLD FELLER, OF COURSE YOU'LL FRATERNISE WITH US, AND
COME AND BREAK SOME VINDERS."
_Soldier._ "OF COURSE I WON'T; BUT I'LL PUNCH YOUR HEAD IF YOU DONT
MOVE OFF."]
[Illustration: _UNLUCKY THIS TIME._
_Ingenious Youth._ "OH! SUCH A LARK, BILL! I'VE BIN AND FILLED AN OLD
COVE'S LETTER-BOX WITH GOOSEBERRY SKINS AND HOYSTER SHELLS,--AND RAPPED
LIKE A POSTMAN!"
_Old Cove._ "_HAVE_ YOU?"]
[Illustration: _GOOD NEWS._
"WELL, JIM, HAVE YOU HEARD THE LATEST INTELLIGENCE?"
"NO, VAT IS IT?"
"VY, COMMON GARDEN THEAYTER'S TO BE TURNED INTO A HOPERA FOR THE
MILLION! AIN'T THAT PRIME?"]
[Illustration: _RATHER DEEP!_
_Cousin._ "CHARLIE!--JUST FANCY WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING!"
_Captain Charlie._ "WELL, GEORGIE!"
_Cousin._ "THAT--THAT--YOU AND I ARE GOING--A--A--TO BE--MARRIED!"
_Charlie_ (_with presence of mind_). "A--NEVER MIND, GEORGIE,--WE KNOW
BETTER--WE ARE NOT SO FOOLISH!"]
[Illustration: _AMPLE PROTECTION._
_Youth._ "YOU NEEDN'T BE AFRAID, MA'AM. STAND BEHIND ME!"]
[Illustration: _JUST LIKE 'EM._
_Mamma_ (_staying with newly-married daughter_). "MY DEAREST, SWEETEST
DARLING! WHAT! CRYING! WHY, WHAT'S THE MATTER?"
_Daughter_ (_with many sobs_). "OH, M-M-M-MAMMA DEAR! HERE'S
CH-CH-CH-CHARLES SO DREADFULLY UNKIND. HE KNOWS THE H-H-HORSE-TAMING
SECRET, AND HE W-W-W-WON'T TELL IT TO ME!"]
[Illustration: _RIVAL JOCKEYS._
_Bill_ (_reads_). "'GENTLEMEN RIDERS ALLOWED FIVE POUNDS.'"
_Tom._ "'ALLOWED FIVE POUNDS!' WHY, I'D RIDE BETTER NOR HE FOR 'ARF A
CROWN!"]
[Illustration: _SYMPTOMS OF HARD READING!_
_Student._ "OH, MARY! HAVE YOU TAKEN UP THE LAMP AND THE CIGARS?"
_Mary._ "YES, SIR."
_Student._ "--AND THE WHISKEY, AND THE SUGAR, AND THE LEMON, AND
BOILING WATER?"
_Mary._ "YES, SIR."
_Student._ "THEN COME, JACK! SUPPOSE WE GO INTO THE STUDY!"]
[Illustration: _REPELLING FOREIGN INVASION._