Upon returning to the city, M. T. Pate met with a misfortune, which gave
him sad affliction when he afterwards came to reflect upon his folly. He
had throughout the whole course of his life been a very temperate man,
and on Sundays was exceedingly pious. But he and Hercules were now
seduced by a party of dissolute fellows, who kept them in a state of
inebriation for several days. In fact, Hercules got profoundly
intoxicated, and continued in that condition until he was carried on
board the ship when she was about to sail; while Pate became boisterous
and broke a number of goblets and decanters, and even challenged the
proprietor of the hotel to a pugilistic combat. The latter earnestly
implored the interposition of Toney Belton, who, upon going to Pate's
room, found him standing in the midst of a number of boon-companions,
with a bottle in his grasp, making as much noise as was possible by
bellowing forth the following bacchanalian melody:
The ruby wine sparkles so bright in the bowl,
To pleasure it seems to invite;
And, by heavens, I vow he's a pitiful soul
Who scorneth our revels to night.
Let sages discourse on the follies of man,
And learnedly talk of his woes;
But boys, we'll be happy whilever we can,--
So toss off the goblet!--here goes!
Oh, why should we mourn o'er the sorrows of earth,
And turn from its pleasures away?
He's wiser by far who turns sorrow to mirth,
And tastes of life's joys while he may.
When all that the sages have taught is summed up,
Can it lessen one moment our woes?
Oh, no! but they linger not over the cup,--
So toss off the goblet!--here goes!
When this song was concluded, Toney began to express his astonishment at
Pate's conduct, but his voice was soon drowned by several fellows loudly
singing,--
Silvery dews are falling lightly,
Golden stars are twinkling brightly,
Now's the hour when Pleasure greets us,
Round the festive board she meets us,
When we mingle heart and soul
O'er the flowing, foaming bowl.
"But, Mr. Pate, you will be sorry for this when----"
Farewell now to care and sorrow!
They our moments ne'er shall borrow;--
We, the joyous sons of folly,
Leave to sages melancholy,
When we mingle heart and soul
O'er the flowing, foaming bowl.
"Yes, this is fine fun," said Toney; "but after awhile you will have
trouble, and----"
If the ills of life surround us,
If misfortune's arrows wound us,
Still a balm we may discover
In the bumper running over,
When we mingle heart and soul
O'er the flowing, foaming bowl.
"By heavens, you ought to have a strait-jacket!" said Toney. "Ain't you
a pretty picture?--standing there with your coat off and your breeches
rent in the rear! I wish some of the ladies whom you used to be making
love to could now see----"
Cupid is a treacherous urchin,
With his darts each bosom searching;
If we've false and cruel found him,
On the bumper's brim we'll drown him,
When we mingle heart and soul
O'er the flowing, foaming bowl.
"Pate, you'll be singing another song to-morrow, when----"
Fortune, whom we've trusted blindly,
She may deal with us unkindly;
At her freaks we're lightly laughing,
As the bright wine we are quaffing,
When we mingle heart and soul
O'er the flowing, foaming bowl.
"You are as crazy as a bedlamite!" exclaimed Toney, "When you come to
your senses, you will consider this the greatest misfortune that----"
Glorious rainbows, shine forever
O'er misfortune's clouds, and never
Fade away from a good fellow
In his glasses growing mellow,
When we mingle heart and soul
O'er the flowing, foaming bowl.
"Well, go ahead!" said Toney, turning on his heels. "Go ahead, if you
think there is no hereafter----"
Give the night to song and laughter,--
Care may come, perchance, hereafter;
We will linger till the morning
Smileth with a rosy warning,
When we'll mingle heart and soul
O'er a flowing, parting bowl.
Pate continued to conduct himself in this outrageous manner,
notwithstanding the repeated and earnest remonstrances of his friends,
until the morning on which the vessel was to sail, when the Professor
found him, with a rueful countenance, sitting on the stool of
repentance. They proceeded to the office of the hotel to settle their
bills.
In Brazil they have an imaginary coin, corresponding to the mill of our
decimal currency, in which, when making out a bill, they compute the
amount, putting before the sum charged the identical mark which is
prefixed to the Federal dollar, so that a stranger, whose debit is ten
dollars, sees on the bill $10.000. The Professor was aware of this mode
of computation, but M. T. Pate was not. The latter was therefore utterly
astounded when his bill was handed to him, and he saw charged on it
$55.000. Pate turned deadly pale when he perceived the heavy sum he was
expected to pay; and Toney and the Professor took him aside and told him
that, while so dreadfully intoxicated, he had broken and destroyed much
valuable property in the hotel, and that the damage was charged in the
bill. Pate was now shocked at the consequences of his indiscretion, and
exclaimed,--
"Oh, that a man should be such a fool!"
"As to put an enemy in his mouth to steal away his brains," said the
Professor.
"What am I to do?" cried Pate.
"Pay the bill," said Toney.
"I cannot. It is impossible for me to pay so large a sum of money," said
Pate.
"I am sorry for that," said the Professor. "In Brazil there is
imprisonment for debt."
"What?" exclaimed Pate, in extreme terror.
"There is imprisonment for debt in this country," said the Professor;
"and if you do not pay the bill, the proprietor of the hotel will have
you put in the calaboose."
"Where you may have to remain during your whole life," said Toney.
"Oh! oh!" cried Pate, looking as pale as a ghost. "What--what shall I
do?"
"Get the money and pay the bill," said Toney.
"I cannot--I cannot!" said Pate, perspiring from every pore.
"This is a great calamity," said the Professor. "Only to think of a man
having to spend, perhaps, forty years of his life in prison!"
"To end his days in a dungeon!" said Toney, sadly.
"Gentlemen--gentlemen! what--what shall I do?" exclaimed Pate, groaning
piteously.
"Toney," said the Professor, "an expedient suggests itself to my mind,
but I am doubtful of its propriety."
"What is it?" asked Toney.
"Do you think that it would be morally wrong for Mr. Pate to take French
leave?"
"I do not," said Toney. "He cannot pay the bill, and unless he escapes
as speedily as possible he may have to die in prison. A man may do
anything to preserve his liberty. Besides, when Mr. Pate returns from
California with his gold, he can stop at Rio and pay the bill."
"I will! I will!" exclaimed Pate. "I will pay every dollar of it!"
"Come here, Mr. Pate," said the Professor. And he and Toney conducted
him to the street and pointed towards the harbor.
"Run!" said the Professor.
"Run!--run!" exclaimed Toney.
"Run, Pate!--run!" cried Tom Seddon, who had followed them out.
The delinquent debtor looked around to see if his ruthless creditor was
watching him, and then darted down the street and ran at full speed
until he reached the water's edge, when he leaped into a boat, and told
the men to row as fast as they could for the ship. In the mean while
Toney and the Professor returned to the office of the hotel and quietly
settled the bill with the contents of Pate's purse, which they had taken
from his pocket while he was intoxicated, and still retained in their
possession for safe keeping.
When M. T. Pate came near the ship, he beheld the extraordinary
spectacle of a human body rising from the surface of the water and
hanging high in the air, with its arms and legs desperately striking
out, as if seeking to test, by a practical experiment, the possibility
of swimming in that uncertain element. After dangling over the deck for
a short space of time, it disappeared behind the bulwarks.
Pate witnessed the awful spectacle with a feeling of intense horror.
"Great heavens!" he exclaimed, "has the captain taken upon himself the
responsibility of ordering an execution? What a daring exercise of
arbitrary power! It is dangerous to go on board! The brutal tyrant might
hang any of his passengers!"
He was about to order the men to row back to the shore when he
recollected the danger which there awaited him. He was between Scylla
and Charybdis. In the mean while the Brazilian boatmen, who, with their
backs towards the ship and their ignorance of the English language,
neither witnessed the startling phenomenon nor understood the meaning of
Pate's exclamation, vigorously plied their oars, and soon brought the
boat to the vessel's side. Pale with terror and trembling in every
joint, Pate looked up and beheld a number of passengers on deck laughing
immoderately. Their mirth convinced him that no tragedy had been
enacted, and he went on board where he learned that Hercules had been
captured on shore and brought alongside lying in the boat in a helpless
condition superinduced by inebriation. A perplexing consultation among
his captors was cut short by Old Nick, who, having made ready a rope,
leaped into the boat, and putting a stout band around the body of the
giant, hooked on,--and up he went, with his imperfectly articulated
maledictions mingling with the hearty "Heave ho!" of Peter and Paul, who
were hoisting him on deck.
Thus was Hercules held up as an example to all evildoers; and when the
Professor reached the ship, and was informed of the circumstance, he
gravely remarked that men who were so imprudent as to indulge in the
excessive use of strong drinks would sometimes become wonderfully
elevated.