"Show me where to sign," says I.
"We have to go through the disagreeable formality of searching these
premises," said Mr. Phelps, disregarding my joke, "and if you have no
objections we shall begin now!"
"And suppose I _did_ have an objection?" I asked.
"We'd search them just the same," said Mr. Phelps, grinning.
I was in two minds what to do; but I noticed the bookkeeper's lip was
cut, and there was dried blood on Mr. Nettleship's knuckles, and it
didn't seem good enough. I saw they had begun on Tom first, and that
decided me to take water with my formality.
"Walk in," says I.
They didn't wait for a second asking, and a minute later were poking and
rummaging all through the place. They thought I might have hid him
somewheres, and turned over everything to that end, not opening as much
as a chest or pulling out a single drawer. It wasn't much pleasure to
look on and see them doing it, but I had to take my medicine, and it was
common sense to appear cheerful about it. They crawled into all kinds of
places, and backed out of all kinds of others, and tapped the walls to
see if any was hollow, and turned over sacks of pearl shell and copra,
and sneezed and swore and burrowed and choked, till at last Mr. Phelps
really found something, and that was a centipede that bit him. This
brought them all out on the front veranda again, where I had to pretend
I was sorry, which I was--for the centipede.
I asked what they were going to do next, and they said, "Get aboard and
bathe it with ammoniar"; and I said, "No, I meant about Runyon Rufe";
and Mr. Phelps he give me a wicked look, and said that they'd lay him by
the legs before long, together with a few white trading gentlemen,
maybe, to keep him company; and I said, "Oh, dear, I hope that isn't any
insinuation against present company!" and he said, "the present company
might put the cap on if it fitted them"; and I said "if he couldn't keep
a civil tongue in his head he had better get off my front stoop"; and
he said "he wouldn't demean himself by bandying words with a
beach-comber," and went off sucking his hand, with the others crowding
around him, and asking him how it felt now.
I suspicioned there had been a leak somewheres, and was surer than ever
when Tom came around with his eye bunged up where Nettleship had hit
him. And it certainly looked black that they made no appearance of
moving, raising an awning over the quarter-deck, and bringing up tables
and swinging hammocks like it was for a week. The pastor had told Tom
that one of the children had reckonized Old Dibs's photograph, and
clapped his hands before he could be stopped, crying out, "Ona! Ona!"
the name Old Dibs went by among the Kanakas.
We put in a pretty anxious day, for they began a systematic prowl all
over the island, obviously dividing out the territory and doing it
simultaneous. That night they set a watch on my house and Tom's, the
news coming in from Iosefo, who had spies out watching them. It was
regular wheels within wheels, and I couldn't but wonder how poor Old
Dibs was faring up his tree, waiting and waiting for us to come!
The next day they prowled harder than ever, this time the crew joining
in, mate, cook, cabin boy, and four hands. Like was natural, they made
me and Tom's first--the crew, I mean--and we both had the same happy
thought, square-face. The mate went off with only three drinks in him,
taking the cabin boy with two, but the rest of them sucked it in by the
bucket, and the fartherest any of them got away was a hundred yards, and
him with a bottle in his hand. They were a pretty ugly crowd by
nightfall, refusing to go back to the ship when ordered, and roaring and
yelling about the settlement to all hours. The afterguard still kept tab
on me and Tom, however, and so yet another night passed without our
daring to make our date with Old Dibs. But in the morning they lost all
patience, rounding up the crew with handspikes, and all going off to the
schooner with half of them in irons. Phelps and Nettleship helped to get
up anchor themselves, and toward nine o'clock we had the blessed sight
of their heels, beating out of the lagoon against a stiff trade.
It was hard to have to wait the balance of the day doing nothing, for we
might need the tree idea again, and it would have been a mug's game to
have given away the secret to the Kanakas. Tom and me both felt
considerable rocky, besides, from having drunk so much gin with the
schooner's people; for though we had held back all we could, and had
tipped our glasses on the sly, we couldn't seem too behindhand in
whooping it up with them. But we were dead dogs now all right, and the
main part of breakfast and dinner was the buckets of water we poured
over each other's heads. It was what you might call a very long day, and
it seemed like the sun would never set, for we were both of us in a
sweat about Old Dibs, and more than anxious how he had made out.
Then sundown came, and dusk, and night itself, and still another long
spell for the Kanakas to go to sleep, which it seemed as though they
never would. Yes, a long day, and a long, long evening, and it was like
a whole week had passed before we stood under the tree and owly-owled to
Old Dibs.
It was a mighty faint answer he gave back, and when me and Tom had
rigged up the chair again we found we had a sick man on our hands. The
exposure had nearly done for him; that, and the fear of being caught,
and all the water having leaked out of the demijohn, which he had stood
on its side the better to hide it. He was that weak he could hardly sit
up, and was partly off his nut, besides, wanting to telephone at once to
Longhurst, and mixing up Tom with the Public Prosecutor.
He would put his poor old trembling hand across his forehead like he was
trying to wipe all this away, saying, "Is that you, Tom Riley?" and,
"Bill, Bill," like that. It was no easy matter to get him down, for he
almost needed to be lifted into the boatswain's chair, and couldn't as
much as raise a little finger to help himself or hold on, and once we
nearly spilled him out altogether. Fortunately, my old girl had brought
some hot coffee in a beer bottle, and this was just like pouring new
life down his throat. Our first business was to get him home and tuck
him in, returning and making a second trip of the treasure, and winding
up all serene about two in the morning, with Old Dibs sitting up in bed
and eating fried eggs.
When Iosefo reported next morning, Old Dibs paid him a hundred dollars
and dispensed with his services, saying that though he'd always be glad
to see him around as a friend, he had no more call to keep him sitting
on the chest. This made Tom and me feel good, for it showed he trusted
us now, which he had never quite done before. In a day or two he was
almost as lively as ever, out in the graveyard playing on his flute, and
attending to church work on committee nights the same as before.
But there was a big change in him for all that, and me and Tom got it
into our heads that he wasn't going to live very long, for he had that
distressed look on his face that showed something wrong inside. He used
to run on talking to himself half the night, and once he burst in to
where I was asleep, saying he had seen me at the treasure chest, prizing
off the lid, and what did I mean by it? After having lived together so
long and comfortable, it wasn't very pleasant to see him going crazy on
us--and going crazy that way--being suspicious we meant to rob and kill
him, and all of us being in a conspiracy. He told the pastor he was
afraid of his life of Tom and me, and if it wasn't for Iosefo he would
be fearful to stay in my house a minute; and he told Tom _he_ was the
only friend he had; and then said the same to me, warning me against Tom
and Iosefo, saying they were at the winder every night trying to break
in. And all this, maybe, on the very self-same day, the three of us
comparing notes and wondering where it was all going to end.
It ended sooner than any of us expected; for one morning, when Sarah
went to take him his coffee, his door was locked, and for all our
hammering we couldn't raise a sound. I broke it in at last, expecting
that he'd rise up and shoot me, and dodging when it went inward with a
crash. But there was nobody to shoot, the room being stark empty, and
the only thing of Old Dibs his clothes on a chair. We were at a loss
what to do, and waited for half an hour, thinking he might turn up.
Then, real uneasy in our minds, we went out to look for him. He wasn't
anywhere near the house or the beach, and as a last resort we went
across the island to the graveyard, thinking perhaps he had taken it
into his head to have a before-breakfast tootle on the flute. We found
him, sure enough, in the middle of the graveyard, but laying forward in
his old crimson dressing gown, dead.
Yes, sir, cold to the touch like it had been for hours, and holding a
blackened lantern in his poor old fist--dead as dead--face down in the
coral sand. We rolled him over to do what we could for him, but he had
passed to a place beyond help or hurt. I went back for Tom in a
protuberation, saying, "My God! Tom, what do you think's happened?--Old
Dibs's dead in the graveyard!" I guess the old man had never been so
close to Tom as he had been to me, boarding in my house and almost a
father to me and the wife, for Tom took it awful cool, and asked almost
the first thing about the money.
"You and me will divide on that," he says.
"Sure," I says, "but that can stand over till afterwards, Tom."
"Stand over, nothing!" he says, very sharp; and with that we both set
off running for my house.
It was a jumpy thing to enter that darkened room, with the feeling you
couldn't shake off that Old Dibs was peering in at us, and that every
minute we'd hear his footstep, everything laid out just as he had last
touched them, and almost warm, even to his slippers and his collar and
the old hat against the wall. But it made no more difference to Tom than
if it had been his own hat, and he tramped in like a policeman, saying,
"Where is it, Bill?"
"In one of them two camphor-wood chests," says I.
He lifted up one of them by the end and let it fall ker-bang!
"Not here," says he.
"Try the other," says I, with a sudden sinking.
He let that crash, too, and turning around, looked me in the face.
"Good God, Tom!" said I.
"Just what I suspected all along," said Tom, as savage as a tiger. "He's
made way with it!"
We didn't stop to speak another word, but rummaged the whole room upside
down.
"He's buried it," says Tom, savager than ever, "and what kind of a
bastard was you to let him?"
"It was none of my business," says I.
"None of your business!" he repeated, screaming out at me like a
woman--"to have a quarter of a million by the tail and let it go? You
might have been slack about your own half, but it was a swine's trick
not to keep track of mine!"
"He can't have taken it very far," I said.
"Not far!" yelled Tom, making an insult of every word I said. "Why, what
was to prevent him lugging away a little this day and that, till the
whole caboodle was sunk in a solid block? What do you suppose he was
doing with the lantern, you tom-fool? Planting it, of course--planting
every dollar of it, night after night, while you were snoozing in your
silly bed."
"If it's anywhere it's in the Kanaka graveyard," says I. "I'll go bail
it's within ten feet of where we found his dead body."
"Did you stake the place?" says Tom.
I was ashamed to tell him I hadn't even thought of the money, being
struck all of a heap, and always powerful fond of Old Dibs.
"It would serve you right if I made you dig up the whole graveyard,
single-handed," said Tom; "and if you had a spark of proper feeling,
Bill Hargus, you'd fall on your knees and beg my parding for having
acted like such a damned ninny!"
I would have answered him back in his own coin if I hadn't felt so bad
about it all, and rattled, besides. I had punched Tom's head often and
often, and he had punched mine; but I was staggered by the money being
missing, and the loss of it just seemed to swallow up everything else.
Somehow, it had never seemed _my_ money till then, and the more I felt
it mine the more galling it was to give it up. Tom relented when he saw
how cut up I was, withdrawing all the hard things he had said, and going
on the other tack to cheer me up. He said he was just as big an ass as I
was, and came out handsome about its being both our fault, and how it
didn't matter a hill of beans anyway, for we'd soon get our spades on to
it. It stood to reason it couldn't be far away or buried very deep, and
a little fossicking with an iron ramrod would feel it out in no time.
Well, we gave Old Dibs a good send off, Tom and me making the coffin,
and we buried him in a likely place to windward of the Kanaka graveyard.
Tom wouldn't have him _inside_, for fear the natives might chance on the
treasure themselves, and we put a neat fence around the place, with a
priming and two coats of white paint, and a natty gate to go in by with
brass hinges. The whole settlement turned out, Iosefo outdoing himself,
and the king butting in with an address, and everything shipshape and
Bristol fashion, as sailors say. We didn't have no flowers, and the
whole business was sort of home-made and amateur, but Sarah made up for
the lack of them by pegging out the grave with little poles, and
streamers which gave quite a gay look to it, and fluttered in the wind,
very pretty to see.
Then Tom and me started in our digging operations on a checkerboard
plan, very systematic, with stakes where we left off, working by night
so as not to rouse the natives' ill will. Or, I ought to have said, two
nights, for I guess we didn't cover up our tracks sufficient, and they
got on to it. We discovered this in the form of a depitation of chiefs
and elders, who give us warning it had to stop ker-plunk! They said
they wouldn't allow their graveyard torn up, and altogether acted very
ugly and insulting. Tom and I had to sing small and put in a holiday
neither of us wanted, for the Kanakas had the whip hand of us, and I
never saw them so roused. Tom at first tried to carry it off with a high
hand, informing them that he was a British subjeck, by God! and was they
meaning to interfere with a British subjeck? But I couldn't see how that
gave him any right to dig up Kanaka graveyards for money that didn't
belong to him, and so I smoothed them down and out-talked Tom, saying it
shouldn't happen again, and I was glad they had mentioned it!
We waited a few weeks for the storm to blow over, and then begun again,
this time more cautious than before by a darned sight. We thought we
were managing beautifully, till the next day, when we went out fishing
in Tom's boat and come back to find both our stations burned to the
ground, and all our stuff stacked outside the smoking ruins,
higgledy-piggledy!
This was getting it in the neck, and we saw we were beat. We ran up a
couple of little shacks and settled down to ordinary trading again, with
what good spirits you can imagine. We didn't even dare walk on the
weather side of the island, lest they'd carry out their next threat,
which was to shoot us; and the only revenge we had was raising prices
on them and monkeying with the scales, winning out in both ways. But it
was a poor set off to a quarter of a million of cold coin where almost
we could lay our hands on it, and if there was in the whole world a
human being more blue and miserable than me, it was Tom Riley. Then, to
make matters worse, the whole thing was common property now, the Kanakas
knowing as much as we did, and more, and the news was passed along to
every ship that came--all about Old Dibs and the money in the graveyard.
You might be surprised the natives didn't take a leaf out of our book
and dig it up for themselves; but you'll never really civilize a Kanaka
if you try a thousand years, and they wouldn't have turned up their dead
grandmothers and fathers and aunts for all the gold in the Bank of
England--being sunk in superstition and slavishly afraid of spirits and
the like.
We had to sit with folded hands and pretend to be pleased, while every
ship that called had to take its whack at the graveyard. First it was
the _Lorelei_, getting off scot-free with only a taboo; then it was the
_Tasmanian_, with a bullet through the captain's leg; then the cutter
_Sprite_, with concussion of the brain. I never saw the Kanakas drove so
wild, till at last, when there was a ship off the settlement, they'd set
an anchor watch on the graveyard and do sentry go with loaded guns.
Then one fine day a French schooner from Tahiti ran in, unloaded sixteen
men armed with rifles and carrying pickaxes and spades, who marched
across the island singing the "Marseillaise," and proceeded to take up
the whole place. The natives rallied with everything they could lay
their hands on, from Winchesters to fish spears, and my, if they didn't
chase out them Frenchmen at the double! They got away, leaving one dead
and carrying three, making a bee line for the beach, the schooner
covering their retreat with a blazing Nordenfeldt. They were in such a
hurry to be gone that they cut away their moorings with an ax, and I had
the privilege, later on, of buying their anchor, second hand, for ten
dollars in trade.
The natives got wilder than ever after this, and were almost afraid to
die, lest they'd be dug up again and their bones cast to the winds. From
being the most orderly island in the Pacific, Manihiki slumped to be the
worst; and it got such a name that ships were scared of coming near it;
and once, when Tom and me went out in a whaleboat toward a becalmed
German bark, hoping to raise a newspaper or a sack of potatoes, they
opened fire on us and lowered two boats to tow away the ship. Tom and me
got mixed up in the general opinion of the place, which was stinking bad
and what they called a pirates' nest, and an English man-of-war came
down special to deport Tom. I never was so glad in my life to be an
American, for, though the captain gave Tom what he called the benefit of
the doubt, they fined him two hundred and fifty dollars and slanged him
like a nigger.
The last straw was the visit of a French man-of-war, that opened
broadsides on us without warning, and then landed and burned the
settlement, including everything me and Tom owned in the world, except
the clothes we stood in and the cash we snatched on the run. This was on
account of the "outrage" on the Tahiti schooner.
Tom said the island was becoming a regular human pigeon-shoot, and
wondered where the lightning would strike next; and we both grew clean
sick of it and in a fever to get away. There was not even the temptation
of Old Dibs's treasure to keep us now, for the natives all got together
and heaped up the graveyard solid with rock to the level of the outside
walls, and floored the top with cement six inches deep, putting in a
matter of a thousand tons. It was as solid as a fortification, and
pounded down, besides, with pounders, like a city street; and if ever
there was money in a safe place and likely to stay there undisturbed, I
guess it was Old Dibs's.
It was a happy day for Tom and me when the _Flink_ dropped anchor off
the settlement, and we patched it up with the captain to give us a
passage to the Kingsmills, to begin the world again. It had always lain
sort of heavy on my wife that we hadn't put up a name over old Dibs's
grave, and now that we were going away with that undone she reproached
me awful. You see, I had promised her something nice in the marble line
from Sydney, and kept putting her off and off in the hope she'd forget
it. She had been remarkably fond of the old fellow, as, indeed, so was
I, and she said it was a shame to go away forever with this unattended
to. I didn't have no time for anything fancy, nor the ability neither,
but as the ship lay over for a couple of days I made shift to please her
with a wooden slab. We went over and set it up about an hour before we
sailed, and for all I know it may be there yet. Some folks might kick at
the inscription, but he had always been mighty good and kind and
free-handed to us, and you must take a man as you find him. This was how
it run:
SACRED TO THE MEMORY OF RUNYON RUFE BANKER AND
PHILANTHROPIST ERECTED BY HIS SORROWING FRIENDS