A pedagogue in Indiana, who was “had up” for unmercifully waling the
back of a little girl, justified his action by explaining that “she
persisted in flinging paper pellets at him when his back was turned.”
That is no excuse. Mr. Grile once taught school up in the mountains,
and about every half hour had to remove his coat and scrape off the
dried paper wads adhering to the nap. He never permitted a trifle like
this to unsettle his patience; he just kept on wearing that gaberdine
until it had no nap and the wads wouldn’t stick. But when they took to
dipping them in mucilage he made a complaint to the Board of Directors.
“Young man,” said the Chairman, “ef you don’t like our ways, you’d
better sling your blankets and git. Prentice Mulford tort skule yer for
more’n six months, and he never said a word agin the wads.”
Mr. Grile briefly explained that Mr. Mulford might have been brought up
to paper wads, and didn’t mind them.
“It ain’t no use,” said another Director, “the children hev got to be
amused.”
Mr. Grile protested that there were other amusements quite as
diverting; but the third Director here rose and remarked:
“I perfeckly agree with the Cheer; this youngster better travel. I
consider as paper wads lies at the root uv popillar edyercation; ther a
necessary adjunck uv the skool systim. Mr. Cheerman, I move and second
that this yer skoolmarster be shot.”
Mr. Grile did not remain to observe the result of the voting.