_Question._ What is the _specialite_ of a Briton?
_Answer._ That given him by belonging to a race of born athletes.
_Q._ Can any member of the human family outside the British Isles do
anything in the shape of sport?
_A._ Only imperfectly. However, Australians are good at cricket, and
Americans have been known to adequately train racehorses.
_Q._ Can you give any reason for their partial success?
_A._ Yes. Australians are our first-cousins, and Americans our
first-cousins once removed.
_Q._ Then you consider them of the same stock as the true Briton?
_A._ Quite so. Hence their prowess in the field.
_Q._ What do you think of foreigners?
_A._ That they are typified by "Moosoo."
_Q._ When you speak of "Moosoo," to whom do you refer?
_A._ To the average French duffer, who has about as much knowledge of
sport as a baby in arms.
_Q._ Are all foreigners duffers?
_A._ All; without exception.
_Q._ How do they go out shooting?
_A._ With a horn, a _couteau de chasse_, a toy game-bag, and a
decorated poodle.
_Q._ Can they row at all?
_A._ Not seriously. They can paddle a little, but have no more idea of
pulling than the man in the moon.
_Q._ And yet, did not a Paris crew beat a Thames Eight, on the Seine,
early in the present year?
_A._ Yes; but that was because there was some good reason or other for
the English defeat.
_Q._ It could not have been, of course, because the French Eight was
better than their visitors?
_A._ Certainly not.
_Q._ But is not that the view you would adopt if you were dealing with
two English crews?
_A._ Why, certainly; but this was a race between Britons and
Frenchman, and the former could not naturally be beaten by the latter
on their own merits.
_Q._ Why not?
_A._ Because, as a matter of fact, they couldn't.
_Q._ And so your opinion of the superiority of Britons over foreigners
is unalterable?
_A._ Of course. I should not be a Briton if it were not so.
* * * * *
[Illustration: DECIDEDLY PLEASANT.
_Genial Youth._ "I SAY, GUBBY, OLD CHAP, IS THIS REALLY TRUE ABOUT
YOUR GOING TO MARRY MY SISTER EDIE?"
_Gubbins._ "YES, TOMMY. IT'S ALL SETTLED. BUT WHY DO YOU ASK?"
_G. Y._ "OH! ONLY BECAUSE I SHALL HAVE SUCH A JOLLY SLACK TIME NOW!
YOU KNOW _I'VE_ PULLED OFF NEARLY ALL HER ENGAGEMENTS SO FAR, ONLY
YOU'RE THE FIRST ONE WHO'S BEEN A _REAL STAYER_!!"]
* * * * *