-----
[1] See Introduction to Biglow’s Papers, p. xix.
[2] See Introduction to Dictionary of Americanisms, p. xxiv, and
Biglow’s Papers.
[3] See Introduction to Biglow’s Papers, p. xxiv.
[4] Introduction to Dictionary of Americanisms.
[5] See Dictionary of Americanisms.
[6] See Porter’s account of “The Spirit of the Times.”
C O N T E N T S
O F
T H E F I R S T V O L U M E.
I.
PAGE
MY FIRST AND LAST SPEECH IN THE GENERAL COURT 1
II.
HOSS ALLEN, OF MISSOURI 17
III.
THE WIDOW RUGBY’S HUSBAND 21
IV.
THE BIG BEAR OF ARKANSAS 41
V.
JOHNNY BEEDLE’S COURTSHIP 66
VI.
THE MARRIAGE OF JOHNNY BEEDLE 76
VII.
JOHNNY BEEDLE’S THANKSGIVING 98
VIII.
AUNT NABBY’S STEWED GOOSE 107
IX.
DECLINE AND FALL OF THE CITY OF DOGTOWN 115
X.
THE COON-HUNT; OR, A FENCY COUNTRY 125
XI.
A RIDE WITH OLD KIT KUNCKER 131
XII.
SETH WILLETT: THE ELK COUNTY WITNESS 145
XIII.
THE TWO FAT SALS 154
XIV.
WAR’S YURE HOSS? 157
XV.
BOB LEE 161
XVI.
THE SHOOTING-MATCH 184
XVII.
THE HORSE SWAP 215
XVIII.
THREE CHANCES FOR A WIFE 230
XIX.
THE YANKEE AMONGST THE MERMAIDS 233
XX.
CAPTAIN STICK AND TONEY 257
XXI.
THE WAY BILLY HARRIS DROVE THE DRUM-FISH TO MARKET 262
XXII.
YANKEE HOMESPUN 273
XXIII.
THE INDEFATIGABLE BEAR-HUNTER 275
XXIV.
COLONEL CROCKETT’S RIDE ON THE BACK OF A BUFFALO 293
XXV.
COLONEL CROCKETT’S ADVENTURE WITH A GRIZZLY BEAR 296
XXVI.
COLONEL CROCKETT, THE BEAR, AND THE SWALLOWS 301
XXVII.
A PRETTY PREDICAMENT 305
T R A I T S
OF
A M E R I C A N H U M O U R.
I.
MY FIRST AND LAST SPEECH IN THE GENERAL COURT.
If I live a thousand years, I shall never forget the day I was chosen
representative. Isaac Longlegs ran himself out of a year’s growth to
bring me the news; for I staid away from town-meeting out of dignity, as
the way is, being a candidate. At first I could not believe it; though
when I spied Isaac coming round Slouch’s corner, with his coat-tails
flapping in the wind, and pulling straight ahead for our house, I felt
certain that something was the matter, and my heart began to bump, bump
so, under my jacket, that it was a wonder it didn’t knock a button off.
However, I put on a bold face, and when Isaac came bolting into the
house, I pretended not to be thinking about it.
“Lieutenant Turniptop!” says Isaac, “huh, huh, you’ve got the election!”
“Got what?” says I, pretending to be surprised, in a coolish sort of a
way.
“Got the election,” says he, “all hollow. You’ve got a majority of
thirteen—a clear majority—clean, smack smooth, and no two words about
it!”
“Pooh!” says I, trying to keep cool; though at the same time I felt all
over—I can’t tell how—my skin didn’t seem to fit me. “Pooh!” says I
again; but the idea of going into public life, and being called Squire
Turniptop, was almost too much for me. I seemed to feel as if I was
standing on the tip top of the north pole, with my head above the
clouds, the sun on one side, and the moon on the other. “Got the
election?” says I; “a hem! hem! hem!” And so I tried to put on a proper
dignity; but it was hard work. “Got a majority?” says I, once more.
“As sure as a gun,” says Isaac. “I heard it with my own ears.” Squire
Dobbs read it off to the whole meeting. “Tobias Turniptop has
fifty-nine, and—is—chosen!”
I thought I should have choked! six millions of glorious ideas seemed to
be swelling up all at one time within me. I had just been reading Doctor
Growler’s sermon on the end of the world; but now I thought the world
was only beginning.
“You’re representative to the Gineral Court,” said Isaac, striking his
forefinger into the palm of his left hand, with as much emphasis as if a
new world had been created.