[Illustration: TRAVELLERS SEEING THE “LIONS.”]
THE best of plots may come to the worst of ends. It was no fault,
however, of Gretchen’s; for being in a hurry of her own to meet Ludwig
Liedeback, she clapped the supper upon the table in no time at all.
The transcendental pipe, with the head of Kant upon it, instantly
found itself deposited in a by corner; for Mr. Doppeldick, like his
better half, was a person of substance, keeping a good running account
with Messer and Gabel. Besides, amongst other delicacies, the board
actually displayed those rarest of all inland rarities, oysters,--a bag
of which the warm-hearted Adam Kloot had sent, by way of a token of
remembrance, to his old friend Dietrich; forgetting utterly that it was
full a hundred leagues from the nearest high water-mark of the sea to
the village of Kleinewinkel. Of course they came like other travellers,
with their mouths wide agape, to see the wonders of the place,--but,
then, so much the easier they were to open; and as the worthy couple
did not contemplate any such superfluous nicety as _shaving_ them
before they swallowed them, there was a fair chance that the delicious
morsels would all be devoured before the inauspicious arrival of
Captain Schenk. Some such speculation seemed to glimmer in the eyes of
both Mr. and Mrs. Doppeldick--when, lo! just as the sixth dead oyster
had been body-snatched out of its shell, and was being flavoured up
with lemon and vinegar, the door opened, and in walked a blue cap with
a red band, a pair of mustachios, and a grey cloak without any arms in
its sleeves. Had Madame Doppeldick held any thing but an oyster in her
mouth at that moment it would infallibly have choked her, the flutter
of her heart in her throat was so violent.
“Holy Virgin!--Captain Schenk!”
“At your service, Madame,” answered a voice through the mustachios.
“You are welcome, Captain!” said the worthy master of the house, at
the same time rising, and placing a chair for his guest at that side
of the table which was farthest from the oysters. The officer, without
any ceremony, threw himself into the seat, and then, resting his elbows
upon the table, and his cheeks between his palms, he fixed his dark
eyes on the blushing face of Madame Doppeldick in a long and steady
stare. It is true that he was only mentally reviewing the review;
or, possibly, calculating the chances he had made in favour of an
application he had lately forwarded to Berlin, to be exchanged into
the Royal Guards; but the circumstance sufficed to set every nerve of
Madame Doppeldick a-vibrating, and in two minutes from his arrival, she
had made up her mind that he was a very bold, forward, and presuming
young man.
[Illustration: “O HAM--WHAT A FALLING OFF WAS THERE.”]
It is astonishing, when we have once conceived a prejudice, how
rapidly it grows, and how plentifully it finds nutriment! Like the sea
polypus, it extends its thousand feelers on every side, for anything
they can lay hold of, and the smallest particle afloat in the ocean
of conjecture cannot escape from the tenacity of their grasp. So it
was with Madame Doppeldick. From mistrusting the captain’s eyes, she
came to suspect his nose, his mustachios, his mouth, his chin, and
even the slight furrow of a sabre cut that scarred his forehead just
over the left eyebrow. She felt morally sure that he had received it
in no battle-field, but in some scandalous duel. Luckily she had never
seen Mozart’s celebrated opera, or she would inevitably have set down
Captain Schenk as its libertine masquerading hero, Don Giovanni himself!
[Illustration: “A PIPING BULLFINCH.”]
“You will be sharp-set for supper, Captain,” said the hospitable
host, pushing towards his guest a dish of lean home-made bacon; but
the Captain took no more notice of the invitation than if he had
been stunned stone-deaf by the artillery at the sham-fight in the
morning. Possibly he did not like bacon, or, at any rate, such bacon
as was set before him; for to put the naked Truth on her bare oath,
the Kleinewinkel pigs always looked as if they got their living, like
cockroaches, by creeping through cracks. However, he never changed
his posture, but kept his dark intolerable eyes still fixed on his
hostess’s full and flushed face. He might just as well have stared,--if
he must stare--at the shelves-full of old family china (some of it
elaborately mended and riveted) in the corner cupboard, the door of
which she had left open on purpose; but he had, apparently, no such
considerate respect for female modesty.
“Saint Ursula and the Eleven Thousand be near us!” said the disquieted
Madame Doppeldick to herself. “It is hard enough for people of our
years and bulk to be obliged to lie double;--but to have a strange,
wild, rakish, staring young fellow in the same chamber--I _do_ wish
that Dietrich would make more haste with his supper, that we may get
into bed first!”