The night of the bear-hunters' return there was to be a small dinner at
the Ardácheff house. The Princess had arranged that there should be a
party of six; so that while the four played bridge the fiancés might
talk to one another. She was growing almost nervous, and indeed it had
required all Stephen Strong's assurance that things eventually would
come right to prevent her from being actually unhappy.
"Let 'em alone!" the old man said. "Take no notice! you won't regret
it."
Tamara had only got up from her bed that afternoon and was very pale
and feeble. She wore a white clinging dress and seemed a mere slip of a
girl. The great string of beautiful pearls, Gritzko's latest gift,
which had arrived that morning, was round her neck, and her sweet eyes
glanced up sadly from the blue shadows which encircled them.
Gritzko was already there when the Princess and Tamara reached the
first salon, and his eyes swam with passionate concern when he saw how
Tamara had been suffering. He could not restrain the feeling in his
voice as he exclaimed:
"You have been ill!--my sweet lady! Oh! Tantine, why did you not send
for me? How could you let her suffer?"
And a sudden wave of happiness came over Tamara when he kissed her
hand. She was so weak the least thing could have made her cry.
But her happiness was short-lived, for Gritzko--afraid yet of showing
what was in his heart--seemed now colder than ever; though he was
exulting within himself at the thought that the moment would come soon
when all this pretence should end.
Tamara, knowing nothing of these things, felt a new sinking depression.
In five days she would be his wife, and then when he had paid the
honorable price--how would he treat her?--
He was looking wildly attractive tonight, his voice had a thousand
tones in it when he addressed the others, he was merry and witty and
gay--and almost made love to the Princess--only to his fiancée did he
seem reserved.
The food appeared impossible to swallow. She almost felt at last as
though she were going to faint. The hopeless anguish of the situation
weighed upon her more than ever; for alas! she felt she loved him now
beyond any pride, every barrier was broken down. She had no more anger
or resentment for the night at the hut. All his many sins were forgiven.
Dinner was an impossible penance, and with a feverish excitement she
waited for the time when they should be alone.
It seemed an eternity before coffee was finished and the four retired
to their bridge. Then the two passed out of the room and on into the
blue salon.
It was extremely difficult for both of them. The Prince could scarcely
control his mad longing to caress her. Only that strange turn in his
character held him. Also the knowledge that once he were to grant
himself an inch he could never restrain the whole of his wild passion,
and there were yet five days before she should be really his--.
Tamara looked a white, frozen shape as she almost fell into the sofa
below the Falconet group. Cupid with his laughing eyes peeped down and
mocked her. Gritzko did not sit beside her. He took a chair and leant
on a table near.
"We had good sport," he said dryly. "Your friend can hit things. We got
two bears."
"Jack must have been pleased," Tamara answered dully.
"And your family--they arrive on Monday, isn't it?" he asked. "Your
brother and sister and the estimable Mrs. Hardcastle?" and he laughed
as he always did at the mention of Millicent. "They will wonder, won't
they, why you are marrying this savage! but they will not know."
"No!" said Tamara. "They must never know." Gritzko's face became
whimsical, a disconcerting, mischievous provoking smile stole into his
eyes.
"Do you know yourself?" he asked.
She looked up at him startled. It was her habit now never to meet his
eyes. Indeed, the sense of humiliation under which she lived had
changed all her fearless carriage of head.
"Why do you ask such questions? I might as well ask you why are you
marrying me. We both know that we cannot help it," and there was a
break in her voice which touched him profoundly.
"Answer for yourself please, I may have several other reasons," he said
coldly, and got up and walked across the room picking up a bibelot here
and there, and replacing it restlessly.
Tamara longed to ask him what these reasons were. She was stirred with
a faint hope, but she had not the courage, the intensity of her feeling
made her dumb.
"They--Tantine--or Sonia--have explained to you all the service, I
suppose," he said at last. "It is different to yours in your country.
It means much more--"
"And is more easily broken."
"That is so, but we shall not break ours, except by death," and he
raised his head proudly. "From Wednesday onward the rest of your life
belongs to me."
Tamara shivered. If she could only overcome this numbness which had
returned--if she could only let her frozen heart speak; this was surely
the moment, but she could not, she remained silent and white and
lifeless.
He came over to the sofa.
"Tamara," he said, and his voice vibrated with suppressed passion.
"Will you tell me the truth? Do you hate me,--or what do you feel for
me?"
She thought he meant only to torture her further; she would not answer
the question.
"Is it not enough that you have conquered me by force? Why should you
care to know what my feelings are? As you say, after Wednesday I shall
belong to you--You can strangle me at Milasláv if you wish. My body
will be yours, but my soul you shall never soil or touch, you have no
part or lot in that matter, Prince."
His eyes filled with pain.
"I will even have your soul," he said. Then, as though restraining
further emotion, he went on coldly. "I have arranged that after the
wedding we go to my house, and do not start for the South until
Saturday. There are some things I wish to show you there. Will that be
as you wish?"
"I have no wishes, it is as you please," Tamara answered monotonously.
He gave an impatient shrug, and walked up and down the room, his will
kept its mastery, but it was a tremendous strain. Her words had stung
him, her intense quiet and absence of emotion had produced a faint
doubt. What if after all he should never be able to make her love him.
For the first time in his life a hand of ice clutched his heart. He
knew in those moments of agony that she meant the whole world to him.
He glanced at her slender graceful figure so listlessly leaning against
the blue cushions, at her pale ethereal face, and then he turned
abruptly away toward the door to the other salon.
"Come," he said, "it is of no avail to talk further, we will say
goodnight." Tamara rose. The way to her room led from the opposite side.
"Goodnight then," she said, "make my adieu to Sonia and the rest. I
shall go to bed," and she walked that way. The whole floor was between
them, as she looked back. He stood rigid by the other door.
Then with great strides he was beside her, and had taken her in his
arms.
"Ah! God!" he said, as he fiercely kissed her, and then almost flung
her from him, and strode from the room.
And Tamara went on to her own, trembling with excitement.
This was passion truly, but what if some love lurked underneath?--and
when she reached her great white bed she fell upon her knees, and
burying her face in her hands she prayed to God.
* * * * *
Now of what use to write of the days that followed--the stiff
restrained days--or of the arrival of Tom Underdown and his sister, and
Millicent Hardcastle--or of the splendid Russian ceremonies in the
church or the quieter ones at the Embassy. All that it concerns us to
know is that Gritzko and Tamara were at last alone on this their
wedding night. Alone with all their future before them. Both their
faces had been grave and solemn through all the vows and prayers, but
afterward his had shone with a wild triumph. And as they had driven to
his house on the Fontonka he had held Tamara's hand but had not spoken.
It was a strange eventful moment when he led her up the great stairs
between the rows of bowing servants--up into the salons all decorated
with flowers. Then, still never speaking, he opened the ballroom doors,
and when they had walked its great length and came to the rooms beyond,
he merely said:
"These you must have done by that man in Paris--or how you please," as
though the matter were aloof, and did not interest him. And then
instead of turning into his own sitting-room, he opened a door on the
right, which Tamara did not know, and they entered what had been his
mother's bedroom. It was warmed and lit, but it wore that strange air
of gloom and melancholy which untenanted rooms, consecrated to the
memory of the dead, always have, in spite of blue satin and bright
gilding.
"Tamara," he said, and he took her hand, "these were my mother's rooms.
I loved her very much, and I always thought I would never let any
woman--even my wife--enter them. I have left them just as she used them
last. But now I know that is not what she would have wished."
His deep voice trembled a little with a note of feeling in it which was
new, and which touched Tamara's innermost being.
"I want you to see them now with me, and then while we are in the South
all these things shall be taken away, and they shall be left bare and
white for you to arrange them when we come back, just as you would
like. I want my mother's blessing to rest on us--which it will do--"
Then he paused, and there was a wonderful silence, and when he went on,
his tones were full of a great tenderness.
"Little one, in these rooms, some day I will make you happy."
Tamara trembled so she could hardly stand, the reaction from her misery
was so immense. She swayed a little and put out her hand to steady
herself by the back of a chair. He thought she was going to fall,
seeing her so white, and he put his arm round her as he led her through
the room and into the sitting-room, and then beyond again to a little
sanctuary. Here a lamp swung before the Ikon, and the colors were
subdued and rich, while the virgin's soft eyes looked down upon them.
There were fresh lilies, too, in a vase below, and their scent perfumed
the air. He knelt for a second and whispered a prayer, then he rose,
and they looked into each other's eyes--and their souls met--and all
shadows rolled away.
"Tamara!" he said, and he held out his arms--and with a little
inarticulate cry almost of pain Tamara fell into them--and he folded
her to his heart--while he bent and kissed her hair.
Then he held her from him and looked deep into her eyes.
"Sweetheart--am I forgiven?" he asked, and when she could speak she
answered:
"Yes--you are forgiven."
Then he questioned again.
"Tamara, do you love me?"
But he saw the answer in her sweet face, and did not wait for her to
speak, but kissed her mouth.
Then he lifted her in his arms like a baby and carried her back through
the ghostly rooms to his warm human sitting-room, and there he laid her
tenderly down upon the couch and knelt beside her.
"Oh, my heart," he said. "What this time has been--since you promised
to marry me!--but I would not change it--I wanted you to love me beyond
everything--beyond anger with me, beyond--fear--beyond your pride. Now
tell me you do. My sweet one. Moia Doushka. I must know. I _must_ know.
You mean my life--tell me?"
And passion overcame Tamara, and she answered him in a low voice of
vibrating emotion.
"Gritzko! do you think I care for what you have done or will do! You
know very well I have always loved you!" And she put up her mouth for
him to kiss her. Then he went quite mad for a few moments with joy--he
caressed her as even on the dawn-drive she had never dreamed, and
presently he said with deep earnestness.
"Darling, we must live for one another--in the world of course for
duty; but our real life shall be alone at Milasláv for only you and me.
You must teach me to be calm and to banish impossible thoughts. You
must make yourself my center--Tamara, you must forget all your former
life, and give yourself to me, sweetheart. My country must be your
country, my body your body, and my soul your soul. I love you better
than heaven or earth--and you are mine now till death do us part."
Then the glory of paradise seemed to descend upon Tamara, as he bent
and kissed her lips.
Oh! what did anything else matter in the world since after all he loved
her! This beautiful fierce lover!
Visions of enchantment presented themselves--a complete intoxication of
joy.
He held her in his arms, and all the strange passion and mystic depths
which had fascinated her always, now dwelt in his eyes, only
intensified by delirious love.
"Do you remember, Sweetheart, how you defied and resisted me? Darling!
Heart of mine! but I have conquered you and taken you, in spite of all!
You cannot struggle any more, you are my own. Only you must tell me
that you give me, too, your soul. Ah! you said once I should have no
part or lot in that matter. Tamara, tell me that I have it?"
And Tamara thrilled with ecstasy as she whispered, "Yes, you have it."
She cared not at all about pride--she did not wish to struggle, she
adored being conquered. Her entire being was merged in his.
He held her from him for a second and the old whimsical smile full of
tender mischief stole into his eyes.
"That night at the hut--when you dropped the pistol when--well, don't
you want to know what really did happen?" he said.
She buried her face in his scarlet coat.
"Oh, no, no, no!" she cried. "It is all forgotten and forgiven."
Then with wild passion he clasped her to his breast.
"Oh! Love!" he said. "My sweet Princess; the gods are very kind to us,
for all happiness is yet to come--! I did but kiss your little feet."