For every evil under the sun, there's an answer.
It may be a simple, direct answer; it may be one
that takes years, and seems unrelated to the
problem. But there's an answer--of a kind....
President Folsom XXIV said petulantly to his Secretary of the Treasury:
"Blow me to hell, Bannister, if I understood a single word of that.
_Why_ can't I buy the Nicolaides Collection? And don't start with the
rediscount and the Series W business again. Just tell me _why_."
The Secretary of the Treasury said with an air of apprehension and a
thread-like feeling across his throat: "It boils down to--no money, Mr.
President."
The President was too engrossed in thoughts of the marvelous collection
to fly into a rage. "It's _such_ a bargain," he said mournfully. "An
archaic Henry Moore figure--really too big to finger, but I'm no
culture-snob, thank God--and fifteen early Morrisons and I can't begin
to tell you what else." He looked hopefully at the Secretary of Public
Opinion: "Mightn't I seize it for the public good or something?"
The Secretary of Public Opinion shook his head. His pose was gruffly
professional. "Not a chance, Mr. President. We'd never get away with it.
The art-lovers would scream to high Heaven."
[Illustration]
"I suppose so.... _Why_ isn't there any money?" He had swiveled
dangerously on the Secretary of the Treasury again.
"Sir, purchases of the new Series W bond issue have lagged badly because
potential buyers have been attracted to--"
"Stop it, stop it, _stop_ it! You know I can't make head or tail of that
stuff. Where's the money _going_?"
The Director of the Budget said cautiously: "Mr. President, during the
biennium just ending, the Department of Defense accounted for 78 per
cent of expenditures--"
The Secretary of Defense growled: "Now wait a minute, Felder! We were
voted--"
The President interrupted, raging weakly: "Oh, you rascals! My father
would have known what to do with you! But don't think I can't handle it.
_Don't_ think you can hoodwink me." He punched a button ferociously; his
silly face was contorted with rage and there was a certain tension on
all the faces around the Cabinet table.
Panels slid down abruptly in the walls, revealing grim-faced Secret
Servicemen. Each Cabinet officer was covered by at least two automatic
rifles.
"Take that--that traitor away!" the President yelled. His finger pointed
at the Secretary of Defense, who slumped over the table, sobbing. Two
Secret Servicemen half-carried him from the room.
President Folsom XXIV leaned back, thrusting out his lower lip. He told
the Secretary of the Treasury: "_Get_ me the money for the Nicolaides
Collection. Do you understand? I don't care how you do it. _Get_ it." He
glared at the Secretary of Public Opinion. "Have you any comments?"
"No, Mr. President."
"All right, then." The President unbent and said plaintively: "I don't
see why you can't all be more reasonable. I'm a very reasonable man.
I don't see why I can't have a few pleasures along with my
responsibilities. Really I don't. And I'm sensitive. I don't _like_
these scenes. Very well. That's all. The Cabinet meeting is adjourned."
They rose and left silently in the order of their seniority. The
President noticed that the panels were still down and pushed the button
that raised them again and hid the granite-faced Secret Servicemen. He
took out of his pocket a late Morrison fingering-piece and turned it
over in his hand, a smile of relaxation and bliss spreading over his
face. _Such_ amusing textural contrast! _Such_ unexpected variations on
the classic sequences!
* * * * *
The Cabinet, less the Secretary of Defense, was holding a rump meeting
in an untapped corner of the White House gymnasium.
"God," the Secretary of State said, white-faced. "Poor old Willy!"
The professionally gruff Secretary of Public Opinion said: "We should
murder the bastard. I don't care what happens--"
The Director of the Budget said dryly: "We all know what would happen.
President Folsom XXV would take office. No; we've got to keep plugging
as before. Nothing short of the invincible can topple the Republic...."
"What about a war?" the Secretary of Commerce demanded fiercely. "We've
no proof that our program will work. What about a war?"
State said wearily: "Not while there's a balance of power, my dear man.
The Io-Callisto Question proved that. The Republic and the Soviet fell
all over themselves trying to patch things up as soon as it seemed that
there would be real shooting. Folsom XXIV and his excellency Premier
Yersinsky know at least that much."
The Secretary of the Treasury said: "What would you all think of Steiner
for Defense?"