(_With acknowledgments to some of our chatty contemporaries_.)
HAPPY C.-IN-C.--I saw the Commander-in-Chief to-day passing through the
little village of X in an open car. He was very quietly dressed in khaki,
with touches of scarlet on the hat and by the collar. I waved my hand to
him and he returned the salute. It is small acts like this which endear him
to all. I noticed that the Field-Marshal was not carrying his baton.
Doubtless he did not wish to spoil its pristine freshness with the mud of
the roads.
* * * * *
OF COURSE.--A friend in the Guards tells me that the new food restrictions
do not affect the men in the trenches very seriously. Our brave soldiers
are so inured to hardships by now that they willingly forgo seven-course
dinners.
* * * * *
NOT STARVING.--While on the subject of food, the picture published on page
6 of to-day's issue refutes the idea that the Hun is starving. It
represents the KAISER looking at some pigs. The KAISER can be distinguished
by a x.
* * * * *
FASHIONS FOR MEN.--Now that mid-winter is with us it is quite a common
event to meet fur-clad denizens of the firing line. Some of the new
season's coats are the last word in chic, one which I noticed yesterday
made of black goat, having pockets of seal coney with collar and cuffs of
civet. The wearer's feet were encased in the latest style of gum boots,
reaching to the thigh and fastening with a buckle. These are being worn
loose round the ankle. A green steel helmet, draped in sandbag material,
completed the costume. The field service cap was not being worn inside the
helmet.
* * * * *
NUMBER NINE.--The Army doctors, so it seems, do not fully understand the
delicate constitution of a friend of mine in the Blues, and sent him back
to duty after dosing him with medicine, though he is suffering from pain in
the foot. The medicine generally takes the form of a "Number Nine," the
pill that cures all ills; but last time he went on sick parade they were
out of stock, and he was given two "Number Fours" and a "Number One"
instead. Rough-and-ready pharmacy. What?
* * * * *
SPIRITED.--Met my old chum, Sir William ----, just back from the trenches.
Dear old Billy, what cigars he used to smoke in the good old days! He tells
me that when on a carrying fatigue the other night one of his men dropped
the earthenware receptacle which contains Tommy's greatest consolation in
this terrible war, and every drop of the precious liquid was spilt. Five
minutes later a Jack Johnson landed beside him and put things right. _It
gave him a rum jar_. Good, eh?
* * * * *
WHERE TO LUNCH.--I am just off to lunch with my old pal, the Hon. Adolphus
Lawrie-Carr, of the Motor Transport Section of the A.S.C. I have never seen
him look better than he does now, in hunting stock and field boots, crop
and spurs. He always gives one a first-class meal.
* * * * *
THE NEXT PUSH.--I had a most interesting conversation the other day with
Alphonse, late of the Saveloy. He is on the G.H.Q. Staff in a position of
high trust--something to do with the culinary arrangements, I believe--and
is, of course, in the know. From what he told me confidentially I can
assure all my countless readers that there will be fighting on the Western
Front during 1917, and, in the words of Mr. Hilary Bullox, "If it is not
prolonged until next year, the present year will certainly see the end of
the War." More I cannot divulge.
* * * * *
Our Cautious Contemporaries.
"What can be said with truth is that business in the New Loan for the
first two days is easily AZ per cent. better for new money than for the
same period on the occasion of the last loan."--_Evening Standard_.
* * * * *
"ANCIENT ORDER OF HIBERNIANS.
State President Fee has requisitioned a large supply of stationery; he
announces that he will at once begin an active canvas of the State to
revive old divisions and organize new ones."--_Texas Newspaper_.
Just as if he were at home in dear old Ireland.
* * * * *
"Athens, Wednesday.
The ex-Premiers who were consulted yesterday by the iKng, were
unanimously of opinion that the Entente Note was not yesterday by the
King were unanimously as its acceptance would imply that Greece
contemplated an attack on General Sarrail's rear."--_Continental Daily
Mail_.
Yet there are some people who complain that the situation in Greece is not
entirely clear.
* * * * *
[Illustration: THE APPLE OF DISCORD.