_House of Commons, Monday, July 10._--Glad the sitting's over; often
get a little mixed here; never so magnificently as to-night.
Reached 9th Clause Home-Rule Bill, which settles question of Irish
Representation in Imperial Parliament. When Mr. G. brought in his Bill
in 1886, he proposed to exclude Irish Members. Remember very well
the cheer that filled the Chamber when that announcement made on
introduction of Bill. Those were, as PAT O'BRIEN used to say, "the
days of all-night sittings." Irish Members stood in bitter implacable
attitude of obstruction. At prospect of clearing them out, giving
Great Britain some peace in its own Parliament, the hearts of Members
leaped for joy. Seemed at moment as if this bribe would be enough to
carry the Bill.
Then came time for reflection; chance of reviewing opportunities.
JOSEPH'S rapid insight perceived in this arrangement a stab at the
Union. In phrase which SQUIRE OF MALWOOD to-night obligingly recalled
he had written, "The key of the position is the maintenance of the
full representation of Ireland in the Imperial Parliament."
Mr. G., profiting by experience, proposes in present Bill to maintain
Irish representation in slightly modified number. That would seem to
cut ground from under JOSEPH'S clinging feet. What he passionately,
persistently demanded in 1886, is conceded in 1893. If he cannot
abear other provisions of the Bill, he must surely defend the one that
retains Irish Members at Westminster. Must he, indeed? Those who think
so, know not JOSEPH. For some men the fence might seem a hopelessly
stiff one. JOSEPH takes it as an ordinary item in the day's work. No
apology; no retraction; no explanation. Black was black in 1886. He,
at risk of severing long friendships, said so, and was right. In 1893
black is white. He, anxious only for the prevalence of truth, says so,
and is right again.
This would have been pretty picture for a July night; but anyone could
have drawn it. In House of Commons it's as common as pastels on
the pavement. JOSEPH went the step further that marks the wide gulf
between genius and mediocrity. Having declared that in 1893 he,
impelled by irresistible conscience and unfathomable love for
his country, would vote against what in 1886 he (subject to same
influence) described as the key of the position, JOEY C. turned upon
his right hon. friends on the Treasury Bench, and with manly emotion
that brought tears to the eyes of the Member for Sark, deplored their
inconsistency.
"What I like about JOSEPH," said the Member for Sark, "is his
thoroughness. On finding himself in this new pit, he might have
stopped at the bottom and said nothing till the storm had blown over.
Or, thinking that a mean evasion, he might have defended the course he
has adopted. Those are the alternatives presented to ordinary
mankind: only to JOSEPH comes the idea of standing up and indignantly
belabouring Mr. G. and JOHN MORLEY for indulgence in the unpardonable
sin of inconsistency!"
_Business done._--PRINCE ARTHUR, JOSEPH, SAGE OF QUEEN ANNE'S GATE,
and JOHN REDMOND, unite their forces against Government. Mr. G. saved
by skin of the teeth and majority of 14.
[Illustration: A PARLIAMENTARY BEAR-GARDEN.]
_Tuesday._--TIM HEALY is an honest man and a loyal colleague. But
we are all weak on some point. Temptation irresistible to TIM is
to appropriate other people's rows. To-night's row distinctly and
exclusively SEXTON'S. Yet TIM promptly came to the front, and remained
there throughout the storm. The one clear impression amidst confusing
uproar was that TIM was bobbing on top of the turbulence like a cork
on the apex of a water-spout.
BRODRICK began it, and while storm raged sat silent, astonished at
his own moderation. Had merely remarked that the Irish people were
impecunious and garrulous. As an Irishman himself ought to know
something on point. SAUNDERSON, another member of a gifted race,
explained that, on the whole, he was inclined to regard remark
as complimentary. SEXTON, taking a different view, retorted with
observation that BRODRICK'S language was grossly impertinent.
Chairman, appealed to on point of order, gave a nice ruling. It is now
established among Parliamentary precedents that the phrase "grossly
impertinent," if addressed to an individual, is rank blasphemy; when
applied to a thing 'tis but a choleric word. Committee might usefully
have applied itself to consideration of this delicate distinction.
"Instead of which," as the magistrate once said, it went about roaring
like a famished lion.
For some minutes everyone seemed on his legs. CARMARTHEN had advantage
over most Members by reason of his more than six feet length;
GRANDOLPH, feeling old emotions stirred within him, took prominent
part in the fray; Mr. G., leaning across the table, fixed his glowing
eyes on GRANDOLPH, and warned him that his conduct was not calculated
to assist the Committee in its dilemma; the voice of T. W. RUSSELL
was heard in the land; PRINCE ARTHUR had much to say; Dr. TANNER broke
long silence with a shout; even JUSTIN MCCARTHY was seen on his feet,
and was howled at as if he had been discovered in the act of stealing
the Chairman's pocket-handkerchief. But TIM topped them all. They were
intermittent; he continuous. Whenever there was approach to pause
in the clamour, TIM'S strident voice filled it up with genial
observation, "Name! Name!" they roared at him. "Drag him out," was the
advice given by one forlorn legislator. In delirious delight of
the rapturous hour TIM took no notice of these objurgations and
interruptions. "It's not your funeral," an envious countryman snarled
in his ear. Certainly not; but that should make no difference. TIM
would improve the opportunity to whomsoever it might belong; and he
did.
_Business done._--None. But we had a cheerful row.
[Illustration: "Waiting to Spring."]
_Thursday._--Some excellent speaking to-night, and a walking-match,
in which, lap after lap, Government won. WALLACE led off with speech
sparkling with point; the more effective by contrast with stolid
manner. House crowded and applausive; always grateful to have
something fresh; get it from WALLACE, both in manner and matter.
PRINCE ARTHUR, following later, unusually bitter; pegged away at Bill
and Government for half an hour, and sat down with assertion that
such a Government was not worth attacking. Mr. G., who had listened
to WALLACE'S home-thrusts with face appreciative of their humour,
was unaccountably disturbed by PRINCE ARTHUR'S commentaries. He sat
immediately opposite, waiting to spring; meanwhile, with legs crossed
and arms tightly folded, literally holding himself in. On his feet
with catapultic force when PRINCE ARTHUR, gracefully gathering his
skirts, sat down. A Government not worthy of attack. Ho! A Government
that had failed to adhere to the main principles of its policy. Ha!
But there was another Government which, in 1886, had denounced as
dishonest a revision of judicial rents in Ireland, and a few months
later had passed Bill revising them. Had PRINCE ARTHUR belonged to
that Government? If so, how did he uplift this lofty standard of
action, than which no Pharisee that ever lived in Judea carried it
higher? This and much more Mr. G. declaimed at top of voice, with
flashing eyes, and exuberant gestures, cheers and counter cheers
filling House. Naturally JOSEPH followed with some kind words about
"my right hon. friend." SQUIRE OF MALWOOD, long silent, could not
resist temptation to plunge in. House went off to dinner exhausted by
the tornado of bitter, brilliant speech.
Dull enough after dinner, when walking-match began. Performance
announced for ten o'clock; began punctually; MELLOR acted as starter.
Course, round the Division Lobbies and back to seats. Time, by
Benson's chronometer, varied from 16 mins. 25 secs. to 18 mins. 3
secs. Programme included eighteen races; numbered Clause 9 to
26 inclusive; betting 5 to 1 on Government to pull through; some
uncertainty round first division; talk about plungers in Ministerial
team; when made known that majority was 27, it was seen that
Government were safe. Interest in subsequent races fell away as
Government majority mounted up. For some of the events the Opposition
did not appear at starting-post; Government walked over.
"Demmit, DOUGLAS," said Lord NOM TODDY, coming in mopping his brow,
after eighth Division, "this is not good enough. Next Thursday I shall
send my man down, and let him do the walking round. No use keeping a
dog and barking yourself."
_Business done._--Clauses 9 to 26 added to Home-Rule Bill.
_Friday._--DON'T KEIR HARDIE made bold bid to-day for cheap
advertisement. Motion for Address to QUEEN in congratulation on Royal
Marriage. DON'T KEIR tacked himself on to performance with attempted
Amendment on behalf of the poor and needy. Found no probability of
anyone seconding his Amendment, which therefore could not be put.
Still, served his purpose; suggested visions of portrait of Benefactor
of the People (penny plain, twopence coloured) hung in all the cottage
homes of England.
"Curious," says the Member for Sark, "how rapidly DON'T KEIR HARDIE
has played himself out; perhaps rather notable than curious. House of
Commons is the quickest machine ever invented for taking the measure
of a man. Has looked at Member for West Ham, measured him, weighed
him, and set him aside. When, less than a year ago, he came down, with
his brass band and his trumpets tootling, he was DON'T KEIR HARDIE.
Now, if I may say so, the boot's on the other leg; it's the House of
Commons that Don't Keir for Hardie."
_Business Done._--More about Home-Rule Scheme.
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