_Guzman offers himself to serve in the Company newly raised. His
reception by the Captain, and how they afterwards lived together._
All my fear was, that the muleteer had been misinformed; but on entering
Almagro, I was soon convinced that he had told the truth. I perceived a
flag suspended from a window of one of the houses where I supposed the
Captain had taken up his residence.
I proceeded, therefore, to an inn in the neighbourhood, where I took up
my lodging for that night; and in the morning I dressed myself in my
best suit of clothes, and finest linen, and went to church, where I
heard mass, and from thence to wait upon the Captain, whom I saluted
with an air calculated to make him believe me a young man of quality,
telling him that I had come express to Almagro to have the honour of
serving the King by joining his company. My behaviour and appearance had
the desired effect of casting a mist before the eyes of this officer,
who was an extremely well-bred man. He received me, therefore, in the
most polite manner, testifying his joy at finding me disposed to enter
so early in the career of glory. He then thanked me for the preference I
gave his company, which would be proud to receive among them a cavalier
of noble race, which he could easily perceive I was. “All I regret,”
added he, “is, that all the posts are filled up; but, though I cannot,
therefore, offer you a commission, you shall at least share mine with
me, and we will live together as though you were Captain as well as
myself.”
To convince me that these excessive civilities were not mere
compliments, he insisted on my staying to dinner, and regaled me in good
style. He did not, however, forget to charge one of his servants, in
private, to inquire of mine who I was. My page, who had frequently heard
me style myself Don Juan de Guzman of the house of Toral, answered this
question by saying that this was the name I bore, and that was all he
knew of me. This was reported to the Captain, who most firmly believed
that I was certainly one of the younger branches of that illustrious
house. The next day I invited him, in my turn, to dine with me at my
inn, and spared no expense to render the entertainment as complete as if
I had been in reality the cavalier my valet had represented me to be. I
did not stop here, but gave so many other dinners to the Captain and the
principal officers of the company, that it is no wonder they all
esteemed me, and considered me an honour to their corps. The Captain,
in particular, was so extremely attentive to me, that I was frequently
quite confused at his kind professions of regard. It is true, that to
secure a continuance of his friendship, I sent him, almost every day,
some little present by my page, which he was so kind as to accept of as
a mark of my affection.
In the mean time my purse, having no flux and reflux like the sea, began
to empty itself visibly, without any prospect of being filled again.
What with my clothes, my gallantries, and my travelling expenses, in
addition to these entertainments and presents, I had already squandered
away more than half of my reals, without reckoning what I had lost at
play with the officers, the majority of whom knew better than myself how
to take advantage in gaming of every turn of fortune in their favour. I
had still, however, a sufficient sum remaining to support my assumed
character for some time longer, when orders were given for marching,
and I followed the company, in quality of a volunteer, to the coast,
where we had orders to wait until the galleys which were to transport us
into Italy, with other troops, arrived at Barcelona, where we were to
embark. But it was God’s pleasure that this embarkment should not take
place till three months afterwards. This completed my ruin; for being
willing to continue to live with the Captain and other officers as I had
begun, I was soon compelled to make use of my _corps de reserve_; I mean
my thirty pistoles, which were yet untouched, and which I soon ran
through with as little frugality as my reals. When I found my resources
thus at an end, I was obliged to sell my fine clothes and linen, and to
get rid of my valet, who went to seek his fortune elsewhere; and having
no money to game with, I ceased to associate with the officers, who
guessed but too rightly the reasons that obliged me thus to alter my
conduct towards them.
Reflections now came thick upon the prodigal child; and though I had not
given way to them while my money lasted, now that it was gone, at least
a million presented themselves to my imagination. I recalled to mind all
my past follies, and reproached myself as severely as a professed
pedagogue could have done, resolving to manage better for the future, as
though I had still several bags of reals in my portmanteau. I chiefly
repented of having given such fine entertainments to the Captain, who no
longer invited me to dinner as usual, now that all my money was gone.
The other officers, thinking that I had nothing more to lose, turned
their backs upon me. The serjeants, who had before been in the habit of
visiting me as a second Captain, and who had considered themselves
honoured by my condescending to converse with them, no longer came near
me. There was not a single soldier but avoided me; and I question if
even the blackguards that followed them would have deigned to associate
with me, had I been inclined to have been their comrade. But it was but
just, after such useless extravagance, that I was punished as I
deserved. If there was any thing that could console me in my unfortunate
situation it was, that during the whole course of my prosperity I had
not committed the least knavery. This gave my Captain a good opinion of
me, who, believing as firmly as ever that I was a young man of high
birth, still retained some esteem for me in my misery. He had himself
too well profited by my foolish conduct not to forgive me from the
bottom of his soul; and when I called upon him one evening he received
me much as usual, without taking any notice of the situation of my
affairs, though he was in reality much affected; and he could not avoid
saying, to me, one day that I was more melancholy than usual, “My dear
Guzman, I should indeed be hard-hearted and ungrateful were I insensible
to your troubles, after the many proofs you have given me of your
friendship. But you have yet to learn that my fortune is but little
better than your own; and I am sincerely afflicted that I am utterly
incapable of convincing you of my good wishes by my actions. All I can
pretend to offer you in your present distress is a lodging in my house,
and the table of my servants; for myself, I am obliged to dine out, from
my utter incapacity to receive my friends at home.”
This proposal, which he did not make without a blush, was tendered in so
obliging a manner that I accepted it. Pride becomes nobody, but still
less a man who has no money, and knows not where to lay his head; it is
a cameleon, which lives only on the wind. From his companion I was now
become his servant. But I owe him this piece of justice: instead of
treating me like a common servant, he behaved in the most considerate
manner towards me. When he wished me to do any thing for him, he
requested instead of commanding it; and, on my side, I was always more
anxious than the other domestics to make myself useful to him, that I
might preserve his friendship, and not eat the bread of idleness; and I
so completely succeeded in my desire to please him, by anticipating his
every wish, that, believing me to be faithful, and even prudent, though
I had sufficiently proved myself the reverse by my former dissipations,
he resolved to make me acquainted with the present state of his affairs,
to convince me that he placed entire confidence in me.
He confessed to me then that he was so much reduced, that a few jewels
which he possessed were his only resource. “Can you guess,” added he,
“what has reduced me to this extremity?”--the time that was consumed in
soliciting my employment, and the great presents I was obliged to make
to obtain it. Yes, were I to begin life afresh, I would renounce such a
profession, notwithstanding the desire that every Spanish gentleman
naturally has to acquire glory in the army. I cannot reflect on what I
have submitted to without blushing; for, besides the money that I have
expended, how many whole days have I passed with my hat in my hand,
soliciting, flattering, bowing to the ground, kicking my heels at
levees, sometimes to speak to one person, sometimes to meet with
another, cringing, acting a servant’s part, and a thousand other
meannesses of which I am ashamed! But the most provoking treatment that
I met with, and which I felt most sensibly, was on the day preceding
that on which I had been promised my commission. After having consumed
more than eight months in solicitations in the manner I have just
described to you, I accompanied my patron as he came out of the palace,
and conducted him, with the most profound respect, to the steps of his
carriage, which was in waiting for him, but unfortunately put my hat on
a moment before the carriage drove off. The Minister noticed this,
darted a haughty look at me, and soon convinced me that this accident
had offended him, for my commission was not delivered to me for above
four months after. I even ran the risk of losing both my trouble and my
money by not obtaining it at all.
“God deliver every honest man,” continued he, raising his eyes towards
Heaven, “from persons who possess power and bad dispositions united! How
blind are these idols of the Court, who expect to be adored like
deities! They must surely have forgotten that they are but miserable
comedians, appointed to play principal characters, and that at the end
of the piece, that is to say, of their lives, they must leave the stage
like ourselves, and be thought of no more.”
I was so affected by this relation, that I felt more interested in my
Captain’s misfortunes than my own; and assured him, in the most
impressive terms my heart could dictate, that there was nothing I would
not undertake for him, and that I would willingly expose my life to be
of service to him. He thanked me for my good wishes. “But what
assistance,” added he, smiling, “can I expect from you in your present
condition?” “That we shall see,” answered I; “for though I am young,
necessity inspires wit, and may supply my deficiency of experience.
Leave it to me to find you the means of living at ease until we embark.”
The Captain smiled again at these words, and, without making any reply,
shook his head, to shew me that he placed but little reliance on
professions dictated by my inconsiderate zeal to serve him. Had he
known my talents he would have formed a different opinion; but I soon
obliged him to do me justice.
As the galleys were a long while ere they arrived, we were obliged to be
billeted, upon short allowance, in the different villages, and
frequently moved our quarters. At every house I left a dozen billets,
which brought us in at least twelve reals each, and from some of the
more opulent inhabitants fifty. For my own part, I gained admittance
into every house at free cost, without quartering myself on any in
particular; and I never failed to leave proofs at each that I had the
perfect use of my hands. I really think that I would even have carried
off water from their wells, rather than have gone away empty-handed. By
these means I so completely re-established my Captain’s finances, that
he was enabled to keep open table again as before; and the dexterity of
my hands supplied him abundantly with good cheer, at a cheap rate:
fowls, capons, geese, pullets, and pigeons, fell as thick as hail into
the kitchen, and hams were not wanting to complete the larder.
If by chance the master of a house happened to catch me in the fact, in
case it were but a small theft I made a jest of it, and though a
greater, the worst that could happen to me was to be carried before my
Captain, who reprimanded me in a severe manner, and sometimes caused me
to be imprisoned in a chamber, where I received by his orders a hundred
lashes which I never felt at all, though I always made the room ring
with cries as if I were being torn in pieces, though I was never so much
as touched all the while. This satisfied the injured parties, and saved
the honour of the officer. Sometimes the complainants themselves would
intercede with the Captain on my behalf, conjuring him out of pity to
forgive me.
Jests like these, however, generally grow serious. After these petty
thefts, I was not content until I ventured upon greater. For this
purpose, I selected five or six of the most resolute fellows in our
company; we all disguised ourselves, and went on the highway, where we
stopped several travellers, who, by immediately surrendering their
money, prevented the crimes which their resistance might have caused us
to commit. Our Captain was no sooner informed of these dangerous
proceedings, than, dreading the consequences both to himself and me, he
positively forbade my carrying on this game any longer, desiring me to
confine myself to more innocent amusement for the future, such as
finding false musters, in which science I was a perfect adept. By a
false beard, or a patch on the eye, I could easily make the same soldier
receive pay three times over, without detection. In short, I became so
useful to the Captain, that he confessed to me that my industry alone
was worth much more to him than the whole income that he derived from
his Company.