Chapter 26

WARNINGS—THE PROMOTION OFFICE—A MINISTER’S SECRETARIAT—THE THIRD

SECTION—THE STORY OF A SENTRY—GENERAL DUBBELT—COUNT BENCKENDORF—OLGA

ALEXANDROVNA ZHEREBTSOV—MY SECOND EXILE

Though we were so comfortable in Moscow, we had to move to Petersburg.

My father insisted upon it. Count Strogonov, Minister of Home Affairs,

commanded me to enter his secretariat, and we set off there at the end of

the summer of 1840.

I had, however, been in Petersburg for two or three weeks in December

1839.

It had happened in this way. When I was relieved from police supervision

and received the right to visit the ‘residence and the capital,’ as K.

Aksakov called Petersburg and Moscow respectively, my father definitely

preferred the ‘residence’ on the Neva to the ancient capital. Count

Strogonov, the director of the university, wrote to his brother and I had

to present myself to him. But that was not all. I had been recommended by

the governor of Vladimir for the grade of collegiate assessor; my father

wanted me to receive this grade as soon as possible. In the Promotion

Office the provinces take their turn; this turn comes with the pace of

a tortoise, unless special wires are pulled. They almost always are;

their cost is excessive because a whole province may be taken outside its

regular turn, but a single name must not. Therefore all have to be paid

for, ‘or else some would be getting an advantage for nothing.’ Usually

the officials to be promoted get up a subscription and send a delegate to

represent them; but on this occasion my father took all the expense upon

himself, and in that way several of the titular councillors of Vladimir

were indebted to him for becoming assessors eight months before the

proper time.

When he sent me off to Petersburg to attend to this business, my father

repeated once more, as he said good-bye to me, ‘For God’s sake, be

careful; be on your guard with every one, from the conductor of the

_diligence_ to the acquaintances to whom I am giving you letters. Do not

trust any one. Petersburg nowadays is not what it was in our time. There

is sure to be a spy or two in every company. _Tiens-toi pour averti._’

With this commentary on Petersburg life I got into a diligence of the

earliest pattern, _i.e._ having all the defects gradually eliminated from

later ones, and drove off.

When I reached Petersburg at nine o’clock in the evening, I took a sledge

and drove to St. Isaac’s Square. I wanted that to be the place with which

I was to begin my acquaintance with Petersburg. Everything was covered

with deep snow, only Peter the Great on his horse, gloomy and menacing,

stood out sharply against the grey background and the darkness of the

night.

‘And looming black through mists of night

With stately poise and haughty mien,

Pointing afar with outstretched hand,

A warrior on a horse is seen,

A mighty figure, bold and free.

The steed is reined. It rears aloft

And paws the air imperiously,

So that its lord might further see....’[35]

Why was it the conflict of the 14th of December took place on that

Square? Why was it from that pedestal that the first cry of Russian

freedom rang out? Why did the revolting troops cling round Peter the

First? Was it his reward ... or his punishment? The 14th of December 1825

was the sequel of the work interrupted on the 21st of January 1725.[36]

Nicholas’s guns were turned upon the insurrection and upon the statue

alike; it is a pity that the grapeshot did not shoot down the bronze

Peter....

Returning to my hotel I found one of my cousins awaiting me, and after

talking to him of one thing and another, I touched, without thinking,

upon St. Isaac’s Square and the 14th of December.

‘How is uncle?’ asked my cousin. ‘How did you leave him?’

‘Thank God, just as usual; he sends you his greetings.’

My cousin, without changing his expression in the least, telegraphed

reproach, advice, warning with his eyes alone; the direction of his

eyes made me look round. A man was putting wood into the stove; when he

had lighted it up, himself performing the duty of bellows as he did so,

and making a pool on the floor from the snow that melted off his boots,

he took an oven fork, the length of a Cossack’s lance, and went out.

My cousin at once fell to scolding me for having touched upon such a

‘scabrous’ subject, and in Russian too, before the man. As he went away

he said to me in an undertone: ‘By the way, before I forget it, there is

a barber comes here to the hotel, he sells all sorts of rubbish, combs

and rotten pomatums, please be on your guard with him. I am certain that

he is connected with the police and talks all sorts of nonsense. While I

was staying here I bought some trifles from him just to get rid of him.’

‘To encourage him. Well, and is the laundress in the ranks of the

gendarmes too?’

‘You may laugh, you may laugh, you’ll come to grief before any one;

you’re only just back from exile, and they will put a dozen nurses to

keep watch on you.’

‘Though they say that seven are enough for the child to grow up with one

eye.’

Next day I went to see the official who used in old days to look after my

father’s affairs: he was a Ukrainian, who spoke Russian with an appalling

accent, never listened to what was said to him, and showed his surprise

at everything by shutting his eyes and holding up his fat little paws

in a way that reminded one of a mouse.... He could not restrain himself

either, and seeing that I had taken up my hat, led me aside to the

window, looked about him, and said to me: ‘You mustn’t be angry. Just for

the sake of my old acquaintance with the family of your father and his

late brothers, you must not say much about what has happened to you. Upon

my word, just think yourself, what use is it? Now it has all passed like

smoke. You said something before my cook; she is a Finnish woman. Who can

tell what she is, and I was a little ... more than a little in fact ...

frightened.’

A pleasant town, I thought, as I left the frightened clerk.... The soft

snow was falling in big flakes, the damp, cold wind penetrated to the

very bones, and lifted one’s hat and coat. My driver, who could scarcely

see a step before him, screwing up his eyes and bending his head before

the snow, shouted, ‘’Ware, ’ware!’ I remembered my father’s advice. I

thought of my cousin, of the clerk, and of the travelling sparrow in

George Sand’s fable who asked the half-frozen wolf in Lithuania why he

lived in such a horrid climate. ‘Freedom,’ answered the wolf, ‘makes one

forget the climate.’

The driver was right—beware, beware! and how I longed to make haste and

get away.

My stay was, in fact, brief on my first visit. In three weeks I had

finished all my business, and galloped back to Vladimir for the New Year.

The experience I had gained in Vyatka was extremely useful to me in

the Promotion Office. I knew already that the Promotion Office was

something after the style of old St. Giles’ in London, the den of a

gang of officially recognised thieves, which no inspection, no reform

could change. To clear St. Giles’, they took a pick, pulled down the

houses, and razed them to the ground. That is what should be done with

the Promotion Office. Moreover, it is utterly useless—a sort of parasitic

service, the office of official promotion, a Ministry of grades and

ranks, an archaeological society for the investigation of letters of

nobility, a secretariat of secretariats. It need hardly be said that the

abuses there were bound to be on a higher scale.

My father’s agent brought me a faded old man in a uniform, every button

of which was hanging by a thread; he was anything but clean, and had

already had a drop, though it was early in the day. This was the proof

corrector of the Senate Printing Press; after correcting grammatical

errors, he used to assist various secretaries in other errors behind

the scenes. Within half an hour I had come to terms with him, after

bargaining exactly as though we were discussing the purchase of a horse

or a piece of furniture. He could not, however, give me a positive answer

himself, but ran round to the Senate for instructions, and after getting

them at last, asked for a ‘deposit.’

‘But they will keep their promise?’

‘Oh, excuse me, they are not people like that. It never happens that

after taking a gratuity they do not discharge a debt of honour,’ answered

the proof corrector in a tone of so much offence that I thought it

necessary to soften him with a slight additional gratuity.

‘There used,’ he observed, when I had thus propitiated him, ‘to be

a secretary in the Promotion Office who was a wonderful man. You’ve

maybe heard of him, he used to take bribes recklessly and never got

into trouble. Once a provincial official came to the office to talk

about his business, and as he said good-bye he gave him a grey note

on the sly, under cover of his hat. “But why do you make a secret of

it?” the secretary said to him—“upon my word, as though you were giving

me a love-letter. If it’s a grey one—all the better. Let the other

petitioners see it, it will encourage them when they know that I have

accepted two hundred roubles and settled your business for it.” And

smoothing out the note, he folded it up and put it in his waistcoat

pocket.’

The press corrector was right. The secretary discharged his debt of

honour.

I left Petersburg with a feeling not very far from hatred, and yet there

was no help for it. I had to move to that unattractive town.

I was not long in the service. I got out of my duties in every possible

way, and so I have not a great deal to tell about the service. The

secretariat of the Ministry of Home Affairs had the same relation to the

secretariat of the Vyatka government as boots that have been cleaned

have to those that have not; the leather is the same, the sole is the

same, but the one sort are muddy, while the others are polished. I did

not see clerks drunk in Petersburg. I did not see twenty kopecks taken

for looking up a reference, but yet I somehow fancied that under those

close-fitting dress-coats and carefully combed heads there was such a

nasty, black, envious, petty, and cowardly soul that the head-clerk

of my table in Vyatka seemed to me more of a man than any of them. As

I looked at my new colleagues, I recalled how, on one occasion, after

having a drop too much at the supper at the district surveyors, he played

a dance tune on the guitar, and at last could not resist leaping up with

his guitar and beginning to join in the dance; but these Petersburg

men were never carried away by anything. Their blood never boiled;

wine did not turn their heads. In some dancing class, in company with

German young ladies, they could walk through a French quadrille, pose

as disillusioned, repeat lines from Timofeyev[37] or Kukolnik[38] ...

they were diplomats, aristocrats, and Manfreds. It is only a pity that

Dashkov, the Minister, could not train these Childe Harolds not to stand

at attention and bow even at the theatre, at church, and everywhere.

The Petersburghers laugh at the costumes seen in Moscow; they are

outraged by the caps and Hungarian jackets, the long hair and civilian

moustaches. Moscow certainly is a non-military city, rather careless

and unaccustomed to discipline, but whether that is a good quality or a

defect is a matter of opinion. The harmony of uniformity, the absence

of variety, of what is personal and whimsical, a traditional obligatory

dress and external discipline are all found on the largest scale in the

most inhuman condition in which men live—in barracks. The uniform and a

complete absence of variety are passionately loved by despotism. Nowhere

are fashions followed so respectfully as in Petersburg, and that shows

the immaturity of our culture; our clothes are alien. In Europe people

dress, but we dress up, and so are terrified if a sleeve is too full,

or a collar too narrow. In Paris all that people are afraid of is being

dressed without taste; in London all that they are afraid of is catching

cold; in Italy every one dresses as he likes best. If one were to show

an Englishman the battalions of fops on the Nevsky Prospect, all wearing

exactly similar, tightly buttoned coats, he would take them for a squad

of ‘policemen.’

I had to do violence to my feelings every time I went to the Ministry.

The chief of the secretariat, K. K. von Paul, _Herrnhuter_,[39] and a

virtuous and lymphatic native of the Island of Dago, induced a kind

of pious boredom in all his surroundings. The heads of the sections

ran anxiously about with portfolios and were dissatisfied with the

head-clerks of the tables; the latter wrote and wrote and certainly were

overwhelmed with work, and had the prospect before them of dying at those

tables, or, at any rate, if not particularly fortunate, sitting there

for twenty years. In the Registration Office there was a clerk who had

for thirty-three years been keeping a record of the papers and printed

parcels that went out.

My ‘literary exercises’ were of some benefit to me here too; after

experience of my incapacity for anything else, the head of the section

entrusted me with the composition of a general report on the Ministry

from the various provincial secretariats. The foresight of the government

had led them to propound certain general deductions beforehand, not

leaving them to the chance risks of facts and figures. Thus, for

instance, in the sketch of the proposed report appeared the statement:

‘From the examination of the number and character of crimes’ (neither

their number nor their character was yet known) ‘your Majesty may be

graciously pleased to perceive the progress of national morality, and

the increased zeal of the officials for its improvement.’ Fate and Count

Benckendorf saved me from taking part in this faked report. It happened

in this way.

At nine o’clock one morning, early in December, Matvey told me that the

superintendent of the local police-station wished to see me. I could

not guess what had brought him to me, and bade Matvey show him in. The

superintendent showed me a scrap of paper on which was written that I

was summoned at ten o’clock in the morning to the Third Section of His

Majesty’s Own Secretariat.

‘Very well,’ I answered. ‘That is by Tsyepnoy Bridge, isn’t it?’

‘Don’t trouble yourself,’ he answered. ‘I have a sledge downstairs. I

will go with you.’

It is a bad look-out, I thought, and with a pang at my heart I went into

the bedroom. My wife was sitting with the baby, who had only just begun

to recover after a long illness. ‘What does he want?’ she asked. ‘I don’t

know, some nonsense. I shall have to go with him.... Don’t be anxious.’

My wife looked at me and said nothing; she only turned pale as though a

dark cloud had passed over her, and handed me the child to say good-bye

to it.

I felt at that moment how much heavier every blow is for a man with wife

and children; the blow does not strike him alone, he suffers for all, and

unconsciously blames himself for their sufferings.

The feeling can be conquered, overcome, concealed, but one must recognise

what it costs. I went out of the house in black misery. Very different

was my mood when six years before I had set off with the police-master

Miller to the Pretchistensky police-station.

We drove over the Tsyepnoy Bridge and through the Summer Garden and

turned towards what had been Kotchubey’s house; in the lodge there, the

secular inquisition founded by Nicholas was installed: people who went in

at its back gates, before which we stopped, did not always come out of

them again, or, if they did, it was perhaps to be cast away in Siberia or

perish in the Alexeyevsky ravelin. We crossed all sorts of courtyards and

little squares, and came at last to the office. In spite of the presence

of the commissar, the gendarme did not admit us, but summoned an official

who, after reading the summons, left the police-superintendent in the

corridor and asked me to follow him. He took me to the director’s room.

At a big table near which stood several armchairs a thin, grey-headed old

man, with a sinister face, was sitting in complete solitude. To add to

his dignity, he went on reading a paper to the end, then got up and came

towards me. He had a star on his breast from which I concluded that he

was some sort of commanding officer in the army of spies.

‘Have you seen General Dubbelt?’

‘No.’

He paused. Then, frowning and knitting his brows, without looking me

in the face, he asked me in a sort of threadbare voice (the voice

reminded me of the nervous, hissing notes of Golitsyn junior at the

Moscow commission of inquiry): ‘I think that you have not very long had

permission to visit Petersburg or Moscow?’

‘I received it last year.’

The old man shook his head. ‘And you have made a bad use of the Tsar’s

graciousness. I believe you’ll have to go back again to Vyatka.’

I gazed at him in amazement.

‘Yes,’ he went on, ‘you’ve chosen a fine way to show your gratitude to

the government that permitted you to return.’

‘I don’t understand in the least,’ I said, lost in conjecture.

‘You don’t understand? That’s just what is bad, too! What connections!

What pursuits! Instead of showing your zeal from the first, effacing

the stains left from your youthful errors, turning your abilities to

service—no, indeed, it’s nothing but politics and criticisms, and all

to the detriment of the government. This is what your talk has brought

you to! How is it you’ve learnt nothing from experience? How do you know

that among those who talk to you there is not always some scoundrel[40]

who asks nothing better than to come _here_ a minute later to give

information.’

‘If you can explain to me what it all means, you will greatly oblige me.

I am racking my brains and cannot understand what your words are leading

up to, or at what they are hinting.’

‘What they are leading to? Hm.... Come, did you hear that a sentry at the

Blue Bridge killed and robbed a man at night?’

‘Yes, I did,’ I answered with great simplicity.

‘And perhaps you repeated it?’

‘I believe I did repeat it.’

‘With comments, I daresay?’

‘Very likely.’

‘With what sort of comments? There you see the disposition to attack the

government. I tell you openly, the one thing that does you credit is your

sincere avowal, it will certainly be taken into consideration by the

Count.’

‘Upon my word’ I said, ‘what is there to avow? All the town was talking

of the story; it was talked of in the secretariat, and in the Ministry

of Home Affairs and in the shops. What is there surprising in my having

spoken about the incident?’

‘The diffusion of false and mischievous rumours is a crime amenable to

the law.’

‘You seem to be charging me with having invented the story.’

‘In the note submitted to the Tsar it is merely stated that you assisted

in the propagation of this mischievous rumour, upon which the decision of

the Most High concerning your return to Vyatka has been taken.’

‘You are simply trying to frighten me,’ I answered. ‘How is it possible

to send a man with a wife and child a thousand miles away for such a

trivial matter, and, what’s more, to condemn and sentence him without

even inquiring whether it is true.’

‘You have admitted it yourself.’

‘But you say the report was submitted and the matter settled before you

spoke to me.’

‘Read for yourself.’ The old man went up to the table, fumbled among a

small heap of papers, coolly pulled out one and handed it to me. I read

it and could not believe my eyes; such complete absence of justice, such

insolent, shameless disregard of the law was amazing, even in Russia.

I did not speak. I fancy that the old man himself felt that it was a very

absurd and extremely silly business, as he did not think it necessary to

defend it further, but after a brief silence asked:

‘I believe you said you were married?’

‘I am married.’

‘It is a pity that we did not know that before. However, if anything can

be done, the Count will do it. I will repeat our conversation to him. _In

any case_ you will be banished from Petersburg.’

He looked at me. I did not speak, but felt that my face was burning.

Everything I could not utter, everything restrained within me could be

seen in my face.

The old man dropped his eyes, paused, and in an apathetic voice, with an

affectation of refined politeness, said to me: ‘I will not venture to

detain you further. I most sincerely hope—however, you will hear later.’

I rushed home. My heart was boiling with a consuming fury—that feeling of

impotence, of having no rights, the position of a caged beast at which a

scornful street boy mocks, knowing that all the tiger’s strength is not

enough to break the bars.

I found my wife in a fever; she was taken ill that day, and, having

another fright in the evening, was a few days later prematurely confined.

The baby only lived a day, and it was three or four years before she

fully recovered her strength.

They say that that tender paterfamilias, Nicholas Pavlovitch, shed tears

when his daughter died.... And what strange passion induces them to

raise a hubbub, gallop full-speed, make such a fuss and do everything

in tearing haste, as though the town were on fire, the throne were

tottering, or the dynasty in danger, and all that without the slightest

necessity! It is the sense of romance of the police, the dramatic efforts

of the detective, the spectacular setting for the display of loyal

zeal.... The janissaries, the swashbucklers, the bloodhounds!

On the evening of the day on which I had been to the Third Section, we

were sitting sorrowfully at a small table—the baby was playing with his

toys on it; we spoke little—and all at once some one pulled the bell so

violently that we could not help starting. Matvey rushed to open the

door, and a second later an officer of gendarmes, clashing his sabre and

jingling his spurs, darted into the room and began in choice language

apologising to my wife. He could not have imagined, he had had no

suspicion, no idea that there was a lady and children in the case. It was

extremely unfortunate.... Gendarmes are the very flower of courtesy; if

it were not for their duty, for the sacred obligations of the service,

they would never make secret reports, or even beat post-boys and drivers

at posting-stations. I know that from the Krutitsky Barracks where the

_désolé_ officer was so deeply distressed at being forced to feel in my

pockets. Paul Louis Courier[41] observed in his day that executioners and

prosecutors are the most courteous of men. ‘My dear executioner,’ writes

the prosecutor, ‘if it is not troubling you too much, you will do me the

greatest service if you will kindly undertake to chop off So-and-so’s

head to-morrow morning.’ And the executioner hastens to answer that he

esteems himself fortunate indeed that he can by so trifling a service do

something agreeable to the prosecutor and remains always his devoted and

obedient servant the executioner, and the other man, the third, remains

devoted without his head!

‘General Dubbelt summons you to his presence.’

‘When?’

‘Upon my word! now, at once, this minute.’

‘Matvey, give me my overcoat.’

I pressed my wife’s hand—her face was flushed, her hand was burning. Why

this hurry at ten o’clock in the evening? Had a plot been discovered? Had

some one run away? Was the precious life of Nicholas in danger? I really

was unfair to that sentry, I thought. There was nothing to be surprised

at in one of the agents of this government murdering two or three

passers-by; the sentries of the second and third degree are no better

than their comrade on the Blue Bridge. And what about the head sentry of

all?

Dubbelt had summoned me in order to tell me that Count Benckendorf

commanded my presence at eight o’clock next morning to inform me of the

decision of the Most High.

Dubbelt was an original person; he was probably more intelligent than

the whole of the Third Section—indeed, of all the three sections of

His Majesty’s Own Secretariat. His sunken face, shaded by long, fair

moustaches, his fatigued expression, particularly the furrows on his

cheeks and on his brow, unmistakably betrayed that his breast had been

the battlefield of many passions before the pale-blue uniform had

dominated, or rather hidden, everything within it. His features had

something wolfish and even foxy about them, _i.e._, they expressed the

subtle shrewdness of beasts of prey; there was at once evasiveness and

conceit in them. He was always courteous.

When I went into his study, he was sitting in a uniform coat, without

epaulettes, and smoking a pipe as he wrote. He rose instantly, and

asking me to sit down facing him, began with the following surprising

sentence:

‘Count Alexandr Christophorovitch has given me this opportunity of making

your acquaintance. I believe you saw Sahtynsky this morning?’

‘Yes, I did.’

‘I am very sorry that the occasion that has forced me to ask you to see

me is not quite an agreeable one for you. Your imprudence has again

brought his Majesty’s anger upon you.’

‘I will say to you, General, what I said to Mr. Sahtynsky, I cannot

imagine that I am being exiled simply for having repeated a street

rumour, which you, of course, heard before I did, and possibly spoke of

just as I did.’

‘Yes, I heard the rumour, and I spoke of it, and in that we are alike;

but this is where the difference comes in—in repeating the absurd story

I swore that there was nothing in it, while you made the rumour a ground

for attacking the whole police. It is this unfortunate passion _de

dénigrer le gouvernement_—a passion that has developed in all of you

gentlemen from the fatal example of the West. It is not with us as in

France, where the government is at daggers drawn with the parties—there

it is dragged into the mud. Our government is paternal—everything is

done as privately as possible.... We do our very utmost that everything

should go as quietly and smoothly as possible, and here men, who in spite

of painful experience persist in a fruitless opposition, alarm public

opinion by repeating verbally, and in writing, that the soldiers of the

police murder men in the streets. Isn’t that true? You have written about

it, haven’t you?’

‘I attach so little importance to the matter that I don’t think it

necessary to conceal that I have written about it, and I will add to

whom—to my father.’

‘Of course, it is not an important matter, but see what it has brought

upon you. His Majesty at once remembered your name, and that you had

been in Vyatka, and commanded that you should be sent back there, and so

the Count has commissioned me to inform you that you must come to him

to-morrow at eight o’clock and he will announce to you the decision of

the Most High.’

‘And so it is left that I am to go to Vyatka with a sick wife and a sick

child on account of something that you say is not important?...’

‘Why, are you in the service?’ Dubbelt asked me, looking intently at the

buttons of my uniform coat.

‘In the Ministry of Home Affairs.’

‘Have you been there long?’

‘Six months.’

‘And all the time in Petersburg?’

‘All the time.’

‘I had no idea of it.’

‘You see,’ I said, smiling, ‘how discreetly I have behaved.’

Sahtynsky did not know that I was married, Dubbelt did not know that I

was in the service, but both knew what I said in my own room, what I

thought, and what I wrote to my father.... What was really wrong was that

I was just beginning to be friendly with Petersburg literary men, and to

publish articles, and, worse still, had been transferred from Vladimir

to Petersburg by Count Strogonov without the secret police having been

consulted, and when I arrived in Petersburg had not presented myself

either to Dubbelt or to the Third Section, as worthy persons had hinted

that I should do.

‘To be sure,’ Dubbelt interrupted me, ‘all the evidence that has been

collected about you is to your credit. Only yesterday I was speaking to

Zhukovsky and should be thankful to hear my son spoken of as he spoke of

you.’

‘And yet I am to go to Vyatka?’

‘You see it is your misfortune that the secret report has been handed

in already, and that many circumstances had not been taken into

consideration. You will have to go, there is no altering that, but I

imagine that it might be another town instead of Vyatka. I will talk it

over with the Count, he is going to-night to the Palace. We will try and

do all that can be done to make things easier; the Count is a man of

angelic kindness.’

I got up, Dubbelt escorted me to the door of the study. At that point I

could not restrain myself, and stopping, I said to him:

‘I have one small favour to ask of you, General. If you want me, please

do not send constables or gendarmes. They are noisy and alarming,

especially in the evening. Why should my sick wife be more severely

punished than any one on account of the sentry business?’

‘Oh! good heavens, how unpleasant that is,’ replied Dubbelt, ‘how

tactless they all are! You may rest assured that I will not send a

policeman again. And so till to-morrow; don’t forget, eight o’clock at

the Count’s; we shall meet there.’

It was exactly as though we were agreeing to go to Smurov’s to eat

oysters together.

At eight o’clock next morning I was in Benckendorf’s reception room.

I found five or six petitioners waiting there; they stood gloomy and

anxious by the wall, started at every sound, and then timidly drew

themselves in again, and bowed to every adjutant that passed. Among their

number was a woman in deep mourning, with tear-stained eyes. She sat

with a paper rolled up in her hand, and the roll trembled like a leaf.

Three paces from her stood a tall, rather bent old man of seventy, bald

and sallow, in a dark-green overcoat, with a row of medals and crosses

on his breast. From time to time he sighed, shook his head and murmured

something to himself.

Some sort of ‘friend of the family,’ a flunkey, or a clerk on duty, sat

in the window, lolling at his ease. He got up when I went in, and looking

intently at his face I recognised him; that loathsome figure had been

pointed out to me at the theatre as one of the chief street detectives,

and his name, I remember, was Fabre. He asked me:

‘Have you come with a petition to the Count?’

‘I have come at his summons.’

‘Your surname?’

I mentioned it.

‘Ah,’ he said, changing his tone as though he had met an old

acquaintance, ‘won’t you be pleased to sit down? The Count will be here

in a quarter of an hour.’

It was horribly still and _unheimlich_ in the room, the daylight hardly

penetrated through the fog and frozen window-panes, no one said a word.

The adjutants ran quickly to and fro, and the gendarme standing at the

door sometimes jingled his accoutrements as he shifted from foot to foot.

Two more petitioners came in. The clerk on duty ran to ask each what

he had come about. One of the adjutants went up to him and began in a

half-whisper telling him some story, assuming a desperately roguish air

as he did so. No doubt it was something revolting, for they interspersed

their talk at frequent intervals with flunkeyish, noiseless laughter,

during which the worthy clerk, affecting to be quite helpless, and ready

to explode, repeated: ‘Do stop, for God’s sake stop, I can’t bear it.’

Five minutes later Dubbelt came in with his uniform unbuttoned as though

he were off duty, glanced casually at the petitioners, whereupon they all

bowed, and seeing me at the farther end said: ‘_Bonjour, Monsieur Herzen.

Votre affaire va parfaitement bien_ ... very well indeed.’

They would let me stay, perhaps! I was on the point of asking, but before

I had time to utter a word Dubbelt had disappeared. Next there walked

into the room a general, polished up and highly decorated, tightly laced

and stiffly erect, in white breeches, with a scarf across his breast.

I have never seen a finer general. If ever there is an exhibition of

generals in London as there now is a Baby Exhibition at Cincinnati, I

should advise his being sent from Petersburg. The general went up to the

door from which Benckendorf was to enter and became petrified in stiff

immobility; with great interest I scrutinised this sergeant’s ideal. A

lot of soldiers, I expect, he had flogged in his day for falling out of

step! Where do these people come from? He was born for rifle drill and

army discipline! He was attended by the most elegant cornet in the world,

probably his adjutant, a fair-haired youth, with incredibly long legs,

a tiny face like a squirrel’s, and that simple-hearted expression which

often persists in mamma’s darlings who have never studied anything, or,

at any rate, have never succeeded in learning anything. This eglantine in

uniform stood at a respectful distance from the model general.

Dubbelt darted in again, this time looking dignified, with all his

buttons done up. He at once addressed the general, and asked him what

he had come about. The general, with the perfect correctness with which

privates speak when presenting themselves to their superior officers,

reported: ‘Yesterday I received through Prince Alexandr Ivanovitch the

command of the Most High to join the Army at the front at the Caucasus,

and esteemed it my duty to present myself to his Excellency before

leaving.’

Dubbelt listened with religious attention to this speech, and with a

slight bow as a sign of respect went out and returned a minute later.

‘The Count,’ he said to the general, ‘sincerely regrets that he has not

time to receive your Excellency. He thanks you and has commissioned me

to wish you a good journey.’ Whereupon Dubbelt flung wide his arms,

embraced the general, and twice touched his cheeks with his moustaches.

The general retreated at a solemn march, the youth with the face of a

squirrel and the legs of a crane strode after him. This scene made up to

me for a great deal of bitterness that day. The general’s attitude, the

farewell by proxy, and the sly face of _Reinecke Fuchs_ as he kissed the

brainless countenance of his Excellency was all so ludicrous that I could

scarcely contain myself. I fancied that Dubbelt noticed it and began to

respect me from that time.

At last both folds of the double door were flung open and Benckendorf

walked in. There was nothing unpleasant in the appearance of the chief

of the gendarmes; his exterior was rather typical of a nobleman of the

Baltic provinces, and, indeed, of the German aristocracy generally.

His face looked creased and tired, he had the delusively good-natured

expression which is so often found in evasive and apathetic people.

Possibly Benckendorf did not do all the harm he might have done, being

the head of that terrible police, standing outside the law and above the

law, having a right to meddle in everything. I am ready to believe it,

especially when I recall the insipid expression of his face. But he did

no good either, he had not enough will-power, energy, or heart for that.

To be timid of saying a word in defence of the oppressed is as bad as any

crime in the service of a man so cold and merciless as Nicholas.

How many innocent victims passed through Benckendorf’s hands, how many

perished through his lack of attention, through his frivolity, because

he was engrossed in flirtation perhaps—and how many gloomy images and

painful memories may have haunted his mind and tormented him when,

prematurely collapsing and growing senile, he sailed off to seek, in

betrayal of his own religion, the protection of the Catholic Church with

its all-forgiving indulgences....

‘It has reached the knowledge of his Imperial Majesty,’ he said to

me, ‘that you take part in the diffusion of rumours injurious to the

government. His Majesty, seeing how little you have reformed, graciously

commanded that you should be sent back to Vyatka; but at the request of

General Dubbelt, and relying upon information collected about you, I

have reported to his Majesty on the subject of your wife’s illness, and

his Majesty was graciously pleased to alter his decision. His Majesty

forbids you to visit Petersburg and Moscow, and you will be under police

supervision again, but it is left to the Ministry of Home Affairs to fix

the place where you are to reside.’

‘Allow me to tell you frankly that even at this moment I cannot believe

that there is no other cause for my exile. In 1835 I was exiled on

account of a supper-party at which I was not present! Now I am being

punished for a rumour about which the whole town was talking. It is a

strange fate!’

Benckendorf shrugged his shoulders, and turning out the palms of his

hands like a man who has exhausted all the resources of argument, cut

short my speech.

‘I make known to you the Imperial will, and you answer me with

criticisms. What profit will there be from all that you say to me, or

that I say to you? It is a waste of words. Nothing can be changed now.

What will be later partly depends on you, and since you have referred to

your first affair, I particularly recommend you not to let there be a

third. You will certainly not get off so easily a third time.’

Benckendorf gave me a gracious smile and turned towards the petitioners.

He said very little to them; he took their petition, glanced at it, then

handed it to Dubbelt, receiving the petitioners’ observations with the

same graciously condescending smile. These people had been for whole

months thinking about it, and preparing themselves for this interview,

upon which their honour, their fortune, their family depended; what

effort, what labour had been spent by them before they had succeeded in

getting an entrance, how many times they had knocked at the closed door

and been turned away by the gendarme or the porter. And how immense, how

poignant must the necessity have been that brought them to the head of

the secret police; no doubt all legal channels had been exhausted first.

And this man got rid of them with commonplaces, and probably some clerk

drew up some decision to pass the case on to some other department. And

what had he to preoccupy him? What need had he for haste?

When Benckendorf went up to the old man with the medals, the latter

dropped on his knees and articulated: ‘Your Excellency, enter into my

position.’

‘How degrading!’ cried the Count; ‘you are disgracing your medals,’ and

full of righteous indignation he passed by without taking his petition.

The old man slowly got up, his glassy eyes were full of horror and

bewilderment, his lower lip quivered, he muttered something.

How inhuman these people are when the whim takes them to be humane!

Dubbelt went up to the old man and said: ‘Whatever did you do that for?

Come, give me your petition. I’ll look through it.’

Benckendorf had gone off to see the Tsar.

‘What am I to do?’ I asked Dubbelt.

‘Settle on any town you choose with the Minister of Home Affairs; we

will not interfere. We will send the whole case on there to-morrow. I

congratulate you on its having been so satisfactorily settled.’

‘I am very much obliged to you.’

From Benckendorf I went to the Ministry. Our director, as I have

mentioned, belonged to that class of Germans who have something of the

lemur about them, lanky, slow, and long drawn out. Their brains work

slowly, they do not catch the point at once, and pass through a long

process to reach any sort of conclusion. My story unfortunately arrived

before the communication of the Third Section; he had not expected it

at all, and so was completely bewildered, uttered incoherent phrases,

perceived the fact himself, and to set himself right said to me:

‘_Erlauben Sie mir deutsch zu sprechen_.’ Possibly his remarks were

grammatically more correct in the German language, but they were no

clearer and more definite in meaning. I perceived distinctly two feelings

struggling in him: he grasped all the injustice of it, but thought it

his duty as director to justify the action of the government; at the

same time, he did not like to appear a barbarian in my eyes, nor could

he forget the hostility which invariably existed between the Ministry of

Home Affairs and the secret police. So the task of expressing all this

jumble was in itself not easy. He ended by declaring that he could say

nothing until he had seen the Minister, and going off to see him.

Count Strogonov sent for me, inquired into the matter, listened to the

story attentively, and said to me in conclusion: ‘It’s a police trick,

pure and simple—all right, I’ll pay them out for it.’

I actually imagined that he was going straight off to the Tsar to explain

the position to him; but ministers do not go so far.

‘I have received the command of the Most High concerning you,’ he went

on—‘here it is. You see that it is left to me to select the place of your

exile and a post in the service for you. Where would you like to go?’

‘To Tver or to Novgorod,’ I answered.

‘To be sure.... Well, since the choice of a place is left to me, and

it probably does not matter to you to which of those towns I send

you, I will give you the first councillor’s vacancy in the provincial

government. That is the highest position that you can receive in the

regular way of promotion, so order yourself a uniform with an embroidered

collar,’ he added jocosely.

So that was how I scored, though not on my own play.

A week later Strogonov recommended me to the Senate for an appointment as

councillor at Novgorod.

It really is funny to think how many secretaries, assessors, district and

provincial officials had been scheming passionately, persistently, for

years to get that post; bribes had been given, the most solemn promises

had been received, and here, all at once, a Minister, to carry out the

commands of the Most High and at the same time to have a slap at the

secret police, _punished_ me with this promotion and, by way of gilding

the pill, flung this post, the object of ardent desires and ambitious

dreams, at the feet of a man who accepted it with the firm intention of

throwing it up at the first opportunity.

From Strogonov I went to see a lady; I must say a few words about this

acquaintance.

Among the letters of introduction given me by my father when I first

went to Petersburg was one which I had picked up a dozen times, turned

over and thrust back again into the table drawer, putting off my visit

until another day. The letter was addressed to a lady of seventy, of

high rank and great wealth, whose friendship with my father dated from

time immemorial; he had first made her acquaintance when she was at the

Court of Catherine II.; then they had met in Paris, had travelled here

and there together, and at last both had come to rest at home some thirty

years before.

I disliked persons of consequence as a rule, particularly when they

were women, and even more so when they were seventy; but my father had

inquired for the second time whether I had called upon Olga Alexandrovna

Zherebtsov, so at last I resolved to swallow the bitter pill. A footman

led me into a rather gloomy drawing-room, poorly decorated, and looking

as though it were darkened and faded; the furniture, the hangings,

all had lost their colour, and all had evidently been standing for

ages in the same place. I was reminded of the atmosphere of Princess

Meshtchersky’s house; old age, no less than youth, puts its imprint

on all around it. I waited with resignation for the lady to make her

appearance, preparing myself for tedious questions, for deafness, for

a cough, for attacks on the younger generation, and perhaps moral

exhortations.

Five minutes later a tall old woman, with a stern face that bore traces

of great beauty, walked in with a firm step; an unswerving will, a strong

character, and a strong intellect were apparent in her deportment, in

her movements and her gestures. She scanned me from head to foot with

a penetrating gaze, went up to the sofa, with one movement of her arm

pushed back the table, and said to me: ‘Sit in this armchair here, nearer

to me. I am a great friend of your father’s, you know, and I love him.’

She opened the letter, and handed it to me, saying: ‘Please read it to

me; my eyes are bad.’

The letter was written in French and full of all sorts of compliments,

reminiscences, and allusions. She listened, smiling, and when I had

finished said: ‘His mind shows no signs of age, he is just the same as

ever; he was very charming and very caustic. And now, I suppose, he keeps

his room, wears his dressing-gown, and plays the invalid? Two years ago

I was passing through Moscow and then I went to see your father. “I can

hardly see any one,” he said. “I am breaking up,” and then he got into

talk and forgot his ailments. It’s all nonsense, he is not much older

than I am, two or three years at the most, though I doubt if he is that,

and I am a woman, yet I still keep on my legs. Yes, yes, much water has

flowed by since those days your father talks of. Why, only fancy, he and

I were among the leading dancers. The English dances were the fashion in

those days; Ivan Alexeyevitch and I used to dance at the late Empress’s.

Can you imagine your father in a full-skirted light blue French coat,

wearing powder, and me in a hoop and _décolletée_? It was very pleasant

to dance with him, _il était bel homme_, he was finer looking than

you—let me have a good look at you—yes, he really was finer.... Don’t

be angry, at my age I may tell the truth. Besides, I believe you don’t

care about that—of course, you are literary and learned. Ah, my goodness,

by the way, do tell me please what was all that business with you? Your

father wrote to me when you were sent to Vyatka. I did try to speak to

Bludov, but he did not do anything. They won’t say what they exiled you

for. They keep that a _secret d’état_.’

There was so much simplicity and genuineness in her manner that, contrary

to my expectation, I was at ease and unconstrained with her. I answered

between jest and earnest and told her all about our case.

‘He makes war on students,’ she observed; ‘he has nothing in his head but

conspiracies, and, to be sure, they are pleased to oblige him; they think

of nothing but nonsense. They are such wretched little creatures about

him! Where did he get hold of them—no rank and no family. Well, _mon cher

conspirateur_, how old were you then?—sixteen, I expect.’

‘Just one and twenty,’ I answered, laughing genuinely at her utter

contempt for our political activities, both mine and Nicholas’s, ‘but

then I was the eldest.’

‘Four or five students scared _tout le gouvernement_, you see—what a

disgrace!’

After talking in this style for half an hour, I got up to go.

‘Stay a little,’ said Olga Alexandrovna in a still more friendly tone. ‘I

have not finished my catechism; how was it you carried off your bride?’

‘How do you know?’

‘Oh, my dear, the world is full of rumour—youth, _des passions_. I talked

to your father at the time. He was still angry with you, but, there,

he is a sensible man, he understood.... Thank God you live happily.

What more does he want? “Well,” he said to me, “the boy came to Moscow

contrary to the Imperial decree. If he had been caught he would have been

sent to the fortress.” “But you see he wasn’t caught,” I said, “so you

ought to be thankful for that, and what is the use of talking nonsense

and imagining what might have been?” “Oh, you were always fearless,” he

told me, “and lived recklessly.” “Well, my dear sir, I am ending my days

no worse than other people,” I answered him—“and what’s the sense of your

leaving the young people without money? That’s beyond anything.” “Well,”

he said, “I’ll send them some. I’ll send them some. Don’t be angry.”

You’ll bring your wife to see me, won’t you?’

I thanked her, and said that I had not brought her with me to Petersburg

yet.

‘Where are you staying?’

‘At Demouthe’s.’

‘And do you dine there?’

‘Sometimes there; sometimes at Dumais.’

‘Why restaurants—it’s expensive, and besides it’s not nice for a married

man. If it won’t bore you to dine with an old woman, come here. I am

really very glad to have made your acquaintance. I must thank your father

for having sent you to me; you are a very interesting young man, and have

a good understanding of things though you are young,—so you and I will

have a talk about one thing and another, for you know I am bored with

these courtiers; they can talk of nothing but the court, and who has

received a decoration; it is all so silly.’

In one volume of Thiers’ _History of the Consulate_ he gives a rather

detailed and rather correct account of the murder of Paul. There are

two references in his story to a woman, the sister of Count Zubov, who

was the last of Catherine’s favourites. The beautiful young widow of a

general (killed, I believe, during the war), a passionate and vigorous

character, spoilt by success, endowed with exceptional intellect and

masculine strength of will, she became the centre round which the

discontented rallied during the savage and senseless reign of Paul. The

conspirators met at her house; she incited them, their relations with the

English Embassy were carried on through her. Paul’s police suspected her

at last, and, warned in time, perhaps by Pahlen himself, she went abroad

before it was too late. The plot was by then matured, and while dancing

at a ball at the court of the Prussian king she received the news that

Paul had been killed. Not concealing her joy, she rapturously announced

the news to every one in the ball-room. This so scandalised the Prussian

king that he ordered her to be banished from Berlin within twenty-four

hours.

She went to England. Brilliant, spoilt by court life, and devoured by

a consuming passion for a great career, she made her appearance as a

lioness of the first magnitude in London, and played an important part in

the reserved and exclusive society of the English aristocracy. The Prince

of Wales, _i.e._, the future King George IV., was her devoted adorer, and

soon more than that.... The years of her life abroad were spent amidst

noisy magnificence, but they passed, and glory after glory faded. With

old age came emptiness, misfortunes, loneliness, and the melancholy life

of memory. Her son was killed at Borodino; her daughter died leaving

her a grandchild, now Countess Orlov. Every August the old woman went

from Petersburg to Mozhaisk to visit her son’s grave. Loneliness and

misfortune had not broken her strong character, but only made it more

austere and angular. Like a tree in winter, she retained the outline of

her branches, the leaves had dropped, and the bare twigs were cold and

stiff as dry bones, but the gigantic stature and bold proportions were

but the more distinctly visible, and the trunk, silvered with hoar-frost,

stood proud and gloomy, and no wind, no storm could bend it.

Her long life, so full of movement, the immense wealth of meetings, of

contrasts in it, had formed her disdainful view of the world, which had

its share of mournful truth. She had her own philosophy, resting upon a

profound contempt for her fellow-creatures, though, owing to her active

disposition, she could not abandon them altogether.

‘You don’t know them yet,’ she would say to me, nodding her head towards

the retreating figures of various stout and thin senators and generals.

‘I have seen enough of them. It is not so easy to take me in as they

imagine; before I was twenty my brother was in the highest favour, and

the Empress was very kind to me, and very fond of me. So then, would

you believe it, old men, beribboned and decorated, who could scarcely

drag one leg after the other, were falling over one another to reach the

vestibule and hand me my pelisse and my warm shoes. The Empress died,

and next day my house was deserted. They ran from me as from the plague,

in the madman’s days, you know, and those the very same persons. I went

my way, I had no need of any one, I crossed the sea. After my return the

Lord visited me with great misfortunes, but I met with sympathy from no

one. There were two or three old friends who did not desert me, though.

Well, then, your reign has come. Orlov, you see, has influence, though

indeed I don’t know how far that is true ... they imagine it is, anyway.

They know that he is my heir and that my granddaughter loves me; so now

they are such friends again—again they are ready to hand me my cloak and

my goloshes! Ugh! I know them, but one is sometimes tired of sitting

alone; my eyes are bad, it is hard to read, besides one does not always

care to, so I let them come, they babble all sorts of nonsense; it amuses

me, and serves to pass an hour or two....’

She was a strange, original relic of another age, surrounded by

degenerate successors that had sprung up on the mean and barren soil of

Petersburg court life. She felt superior to it, and she was right. If she

had shared the Saturnalia of Catherine and the orgies of George IV., she

had also shared the dangers of the conspirators of Paul’s reign.

Her mistake lay not in her contempt for these worthless people, but in

her taking this produce of the court kitchen-garden for the whole of our

generation. In the reign of Catherine, the court and the Guards really

did include all that was cultured in Russia; and this persisted, more or

less, until 1812. Since then Russian society has taken immense strides;

the war led to an awakening, and that awakening to the Fourteenth of

December. Society was divided in two from within: the worst part remained

on the side of the court; executions and savage punishments drove away

some, while the new tone prevailing drove away others. Alexander carried

on the traditions of culture of the reign of Catherine. Under Nicholas

the worldly aristocratic tone was replaced by one of frigid formality

and ferocious despotism on the one hand and boundless servility on

the other—a blend of the abrupt and rude Napoleonic manner with the

callousness of bureaucracy. A new society, the centre of which was in

Moscow, rapidly developed.

There is a wonderful book which one cannot help recalling when one speaks

of Olga Alexandrovna—I mean the _Memoirs of Princess Dashkov_, published

twenty years ago in London. To the book are appended the memoirs of the

two sisters Wilmot who lived with Princess Dashkov between 1805 and 1810.

They were highly cultured Irishwomen, with a great gift of observation. I

should very much like their letters and memoirs to be known in Russia.

When I compare Moscow society before 1812 with that which I left in 1847

my heart throbs with joy. We have made tremendous strides forward. In

those days there was a society of the discontented—that is, of those

who had been left out, dismissed, or laid on the shelf; now there is a

society of independent people. The lions of those days were capricious

oligarchs, such as Count A. G. Orlov and Ostermann, ‘a society of

shadows’ as Miss Wilmot says, a society of political men who had died

fifteen years before in Petersburg, but went on powdering their heads,

putting on their ribbons, and appearing at dinners and festivities in

Moscow, sulking, giving themselves airs of consequence, and having

neither influence nor significance. After 1825 the lions of Moscow were

Pushkin, M. Orlov, Tchaadayev, Yermolov. In the earlier days society had

flocked with cringing servility to the house of Count Orlov, ladies ‘in

other people’s diamonds,’[42] gentlemen who dared not sit down without

permission; the Count’s serfs danced before them in masquerade attire.

Forty years later I saw the same society crowding about the platform of

one of the lecture-rooms of the Moscow University; the daughters of those

ladies in other people’s jewels, the sons of the men who had not dared

to sit down, were, with passionate sympathy, following the profound,

vigorous words of Granovsky, greeting with outbursts of applause

sentences that went straight to the heart from their boldness and

nobility.

It was just the society that gathered from all parts of Moscow and

crowded about the platform on which the young champion of learning

delivered his earnest message and deciphered the future from the past—it

was just this society of the existence of which Madame Zherebtsov had

no suspicion. She was particularly kind and attentive to me because I

was the first example of a world unknown to her; she was surprised at

my language and at my ideas. She welcomed in me the coming of another

Russia, not that Russia whose only light filtered through the frozen

windows of the Winter Palace. Thanks to her for that!

I could fill a whole volume with the anecdotes I heard from Olga

Alexandrovna; with whom had she not been on friendly terms, from Comte

d’Artois[43] and the Comte de Ségur[44] to Canning and Lord Granville,

and she looked at all of them independently, from her own point of view,

and a very original one. I will confine myself to one small incident

which I will try to repeat in her own words.

She lived in the Morskaya. A regiment of soldiers happened one day to

pass along the street with a band. Olga Alexandrovna went to the window

and looking at the soldiers said to me: ‘I have a summer villa not far

from Gatchina. I sometimes go there for a rest in the summer. I ordered

a big lawn to be made there before the house, in the English style, you

know, covered with turf. Last year I went down there; only fancy: at six

o’clock in the morning I hear a dreadful beating of drums. I lie in bed

more dead than alive; it keeps coming closer and closer. I ring the bell,

my Kalmyk girl runs in. “What has happened, my good girl?” I ask; “what

is this noise?” “Oh, that,” says she, “Mihail Pavlovitch[45] is pleased

to be drilling his soldiers.” “Where is that?” “On our lawn.” He liked

our lawn, it was so smooth and green. Only fancy, with a lady living

there, old and ill, he came with the drums at six o’clock in the morning.

Well, I thought, that won’t do. “Call the steward,” I said. The steward

came and I said to him: “Have the cart got out at once, drive into

Petersburg, hire as many White Russians as you can find, and let them

begin digging a pond to-morrow.” Well, I thought, I hope they won’t hold

a Naval Review before my windows. They are all such ill-bred creatures!’

It was natural that I should go straight from Strogonov to Olga

Alexandrovna and tell her all that had happened.

‘Good heavens! What folly; they go from bad to worse,’ she observed

when she heard my story. ‘How can a man with a family be dragged off to

exile for such nonsense? Let me talk to Orlov. I hardly ever ask him to

do anything, they all dislike it; but there, once in a way he may do

something for me. Come and see me in a couple of days, and I’ll tell you

his answer.’

Two days later she sent for me. I found several visitors with her. She

had a white batiste kerchief round her head instead of a cap; this was

usually a sign that she was out of spirits; she screwed up her eyes and

hardly took any notice of the privy councillors and generals who had come

to pay their respects to her.

One of the visitors with a very complacent air took a document out of his

pocket and, handing it to Olga Alexandrovna, said: ‘I have brought you

yesterday’s Imperial letter to Prince Pyotr Mihailovitch. Perhaps you

have not yet read it.’

Whether she had heard him or not I do not know, but she took the paper,

opened it, put on her spectacles and, frowning, read with great effort:

‘Pri—nce Pyo—tr Mi—hailo—vitch!’

‘What’s this you have given me? It’s not for me, is it?’

‘I told you it’s an Imperial letter.’

‘Good heavens, my eyes are bad, I can’t always read the letters addressed

to me, and you make me read other people’s letters.’

‘Allow me, I’ll read it ... I didn’t think.’

‘You needn’t; why trouble yourself for nothing? What have I to do with

their correspondence? I am getting through my last days somehow, and my

head is full of something very different.’

The gentleman smiled as people smile when they have made a blunder, and

put the Imperial letter into his pocket.

Seeing that Olga Alexandrovna was in a bad humour, in a very warlike one,

indeed, the visitors one after another took leave. When we were left

alone she said to me: ‘I asked you to come here to tell you that I have

made a fool of myself in my old age. I gave you a promise, and I have

done nothing; you know the peasants’ proverb: “Don’t step into the water

till you know how deep it is.” I spoke to Orlov about your case yesterday

and you’ve nothing to expect....’

At that moment a footman announced that Countess Orlov had arrived.

‘Well, never mind, one of ourselves. I’ll tell you the rest directly.’

The Countess, a beautiful woman, still in the bloom of her age, went up

to kiss her hand and inquire how she was, to which Olga Alexandrovna

answered that she felt very poorly, then mentioning my name, added,

‘Come, sit down, sit down, my dear. How are the children—quite well?’

‘Quite well.’

‘Well, thank God—excuse me, I am just talking about what happened

yesterday. Well, you see, I told her husband to speak to the Tsar about

you, and ask what they are about with this nonsense. Not a bit of it! He

wouldn’t move hand or foot: “That’s Benckendorf’s affair,” he told me.

“I’ll talk to him if you like, but as for reporting on it to the Tsar,

I can’t, he doesn’t like it—besides, it isn’t done!” “What is there,”

I said, “in talking to Benckendorf? I can do that myself. Besides, he

is in his dotage; he doesn’t know what he is doing; his head is full of

actresses, though I should have thought his flirting days were over; some

wretched little secretary gives him all sorts of secret reports and he

hands them on. What would he do? No!” I said, “you had better not demean

yourself asking favours of Benckendorf, the whole nasty business is his

doing.” “It is the rule with us,” he said to me, and began telling me all

about it.... Well, I saw that he was simply afraid to go to the Tsar....

“Whatever is he—a wild beast, or what, that you are afraid to approach

him, though you see him half a dozen times a day?” I said, and turned

away in disgust; it is no use talking to them. Look,’ she added, pointing

to Orlov’s portrait. ‘What a conquering hero he is there; yet he is

afraid to say a word!’

I could not resist looking at Countess Orlov instead of at the portrait;

her position was not very agreeable. She sat smiling, and sometimes

glanced at me as though to say: ‘Age has its privileges, the old lady is

irritated,’ but meeting my eyes, which did not assent, she pretended not

to notice me. She did not enter into the conversation, and that was very

wise of her. It would not have been easy to suppress Olga Alexandrovna,

the old woman’s cheeks were flushed, she would have given back more than

she got. There was nothing for it but to lie low and wait for the storm

to pass over one’s head.

‘Why, I suppose down there where you’ve been, in that Vologda, the

clerks imagine Count Orlov is a man in favour, that he has power....

That’s all nonsense. I’ll be bound it is his subordinates who spread

that rumour. None of them have any influence, they don’t behave so as to

have influence, and they are not on that footing.... You must forgive me

for meddling in what isn’t my business. Do you know what I advise you?

What do you want to go to Novgorod for? You had better go to Odessa; it

is farther away from them and almost like a foreign town, besides, if

Vorontsov isn’t corrupted, he is a man of a different stamp.’

Olga Alexandrovna’s confidence in Vorontsov, who was at that time in

Petersburg and came to see her every day, was not fully justified. He was

willing to take me with him to Odessa _if_ Benckendorf would give his

consent.

Meanwhile the months passed, the winter was over, no one reminded

me about going away. I was forgotten and I gave up being _sur le

qui-vive_, particularly after the following meeting. Bolgovsky, the

military governor of Vologda, was at that time in Petersburg; being a

very intimate friend of my father, he was rather fond of me, and I was

sometimes at his house. He had taken part in the killing of Paul, as a

young officer in the Semyonovsky Regiment, and was afterwards mixed up in

the obscure and unexplained Speransky affair in 1812. He was at that time

a colonel in the army at the front. He was suddenly arrested, brought to

Petersburg, and then sent to Siberia. Before he had time to reach his

place of exile Alexander pardoned him, and he returned to his regiment.

One day in the spring I went to see him; a general was sitting in a big

easy-chair with his back towards the door so that I could not see his

face, but only one silver epaulette.

‘Let me introduce you,’ said Bolgovsky, and then I recognised Dubbelt.

‘I have long enjoyed the pleasure of Leonty Vassilyevitch’s attention,’ I

said, smiling.

‘When are you going to Novgorod?’ he asked me.

‘I thought I ought to ask you that.’

‘Oh! not at all! I had no idea of reminding you. I simply asked the

question. We have handed you over to Count Strogonov, and we are not

trying to hurry you, as you see. Besides, with such a legitimate reason

as your wife’s illness....’

He really was the politest of men!

At last, at the beginning of June, I received the Senate’s decree,

confirming my appointment as councillor in the Novgorod Provincial

Government. Count Strogonov thought it was time for me to set off, and

about the 1st of July I arrived in the ‘City in the keeping of God and of

Saint Sophia’—Novgorod—and settled on the bank of the Volhov, opposite

the very barrow from which the Voltaireans of the twelfth century threw

the wonder-working statue of Perun[46] into the river.

My past and thoughts, vol. 2 (of 6) · 第 3 / 11 章