AN UNCOMFORTABLE NIGHT.
The two travellers boarded a western bound freight train at Brighton.
There being no accessible box car, they were compelled to content
themselves with a seat on the rear steps of the caboose, where they
were discovered and incontinently "bounced" after being carried some
twenty miles. Ben thought this ejectment finished their ride on that
train, but the Evangelist--whose name was Horton--corrected him.
Creeping along in the shadow of the train until it started, they again
seated themselves on the steps. This time they made but ten miles,
before they were discovered, when some strong adjectives were used, and
some hard names called, and they were warned if caught on the train
again they would be dealt with in a most summary manner.
"Wait for another train!" exclaimed the Evangelist. "Certainly not--why
we have only been bounced _twice_!"
He instructed Ben to crouch under the cars at the centre of the train,
and when it started walk with it, so long as he could keep up. When he
found the rate of speed getting too much for him, he was to mount a
ladder, but not put in appearance on the roof until positive that the
crew was not around.
The crew of a freight train consists of the fireman and engineer, who
remain in the locomotive's cab; a conductor who, while the train is in
motion, generally remains in his caboose, and two brakeman--front and
rear--supposed to remain on top, but who, after the train has started,
usually betake themselves to the engine-cab and caboose respectively.
On the night runs all carry lanterns, and through them their approach
is easily discernible by the sly tramp. It will now be understood why
Ben was to delay mounting to the top.
Having clung to the ladder for some time he slowly raised his head
above the roof and surveyed the situation. Not a light appeared in
sight, but on the next car he saw the dark outlines of a man, and heard
the Evangelist crooning to himself a revival hymn. He mounted to the
roof, and both men sat down immediately over their respective ladders,
ready to go down them on the slightest provocation. Much after the
fashion of prairie-dogs, sitting at the mouth of their holes, prepared
at the faintest disturbance to show a clean pair of heels and faint
whisk of a tail. Several times during the ensuing hour the light of
the front brakeman appeared as that individual attended to easing the
train down grades. And each time our two travellers suddenly disappear;
reappearing again when the coast was clear. Having gone about sixteen
miles, the train side tracked to allow an eastern-bound express to
pass. Ben and his companion crouched under the cars until they again
started, when the ladders were resumed and ultimately the roof.
This method of travelling seemed quite pleasant to him and he was
beginning to rest more at ease, and recline on his back, when a
note of warning from the Evangelist aroused him, and glancing along
the train he perceived lights approaching from both directions. The
tramps immediately disappeared in the darkness, while the conductor
and front brakeman met on the identical car to which our friend Ben
was clinging. After some instructions had been given the brakeman,
the political disquietudes of the day became a topic of conversation,
and so interested did they become, that placing their lanterns on the
roof they sat down themselves, to the intense disgust of our friend,
who dared not elevate his head. Unfortunately for him the train was
a through freight and had just entered on one of the longest runs of
the division. The perch that had been comfortable enough for a short
occupancy, soon became quite unendurable with the continued jolting
of the car. His feet grew stiff and his hands sore. Besides he had
to cling close to the ladder in constant terror lest the timbers of
the bridges they frequently crossed should sweep him off. To add to
his misery both of the train men were great consumers of tobacco, and
facing Ben's ladder they poured upon his devoted head a torrent of
tobacco juice. Moments grew to the dignity of hours, minutes to ages.
Never had he been so thoroughly disgusted with politics. He wished he
belonged to a despotism where the discussion of them was punishable
with death. Not only dared he not elevate his head, but he was afraid
to turn his face skywards at all, lest he receive in the eyes and mouth
a charge of the amber juice that was being so liberally bestowed upon
him.
Our hero was certainly in an unenviable position. If he ascended to
the roof and gave himself up, the conductor had threatened in case he
was again caught on the train to hand him over to the authorities the
first stop that was made; a procedure that, under the vagrant laws
would insure him ninety days in the work house; enough to totally wreck
his expectations. On the other hand if he fell to the ground he was
sure to be either killed or badly mangled. In this sad predicament his
over-strained feelings found vent in a groan.
Railroad men, as a class, are superstitious. There are spots along
each crews' route that are vested with supernatural properties. We
knew a practical man of good common-sense, an engineer, who solemnly
avers that on crossing a certain bridge at midnight, a large white
dog always springs across the track immediately his engine leaves the
bridge. Another man, a brakeman, would have deserted his train sooner
than omit changing his lantern three times, from his right hand into
his left, the first time he walked the train. Whatever it is in the
human fabrication that yearns after the incomprehensible we know not;
but that such a force is established there is verified by the scores of
different religious beliefs;--founded on faith or fancy--as you please.
The Administration was receiving a hearty endorsement from the
conductor when Ben's groan struck on his ear. A sudden silence ensued.
The conductor looked at the brakeman, and the brakeman looked at the
conductor. Neither spoke. Another smothered groan came floating from
out the surrounding darkness. The conductor was suddenly reminded that
his way bills needed overhauling and the brakeman discovered that his
presence was needed at the front of the train. Ben was left master of
the situation, though unaware of the influence his groans had had in
placing him there. He dragged his stiffened limbs to the top of the
car, and indulged in a luxurious rub of his bespattered countenance.
Presently he was joined by the Evangelist and the two recounted their
experiences.
By constant watchfulness and much dodging down the ladders, they
retained possession of the train during the night, and the first
glimpses of the morning sun found them at Columbus; having made over
one hundred and twenty miles on the train Ben had thought it impossible
to ride. Stiff, sore, tired and sleepy, but in possession of the
satisfaction of having taken a long step on their journey, our friends
dismounted and took a look around them. While they still stood by the
train the conductor passed. He gave them one look of astonishment, and
with the remark, "Well, I'll be blowed!" went on his way.
As they stood staring about them, not knowing just what to do or where
to turn their steps, a man approached, ringing an old cow bell.
"Just come in on the train, gentlemen?" asked this individual with a
polite bow and monkey-like grin.
The travellers replied in the affirmative.
"Wish to put up at a hotel? Right this way. First-class house. Hotel de
Log! On the European plan. Patronized by the elite. Table spread with
all the delicacies of the season, and the best the market affords. My
clerk was out to a ball last night, and I have to attend to the trains
myself this morning. Any baggage? I'll send the porter after it. Just
follow me. Breakfast is ready. You are just in time. Right this way,
gentlemen. Allow me to carry your coat, sir." This last to Ben, who
immediately professed to be competent to carry it himself.
"Very well," replied he of the cow bell; "come right along. You
gentlemen also"; to two terrible looking tramps, that it was afterwards
discovered had been on the train all the way from Pittsburg, riding
bumpers and trucks.
Curiosity caused the travellers to follow the proprietor of Hotel de
Log. He led them some distance down the track, and then struck across
an open field to a piece of scrub timber, traversed by a brook. A short
walk in this patch of woodland revealed the hotel.
A giant sycamore had bowed its aged head to some western tornado, and
lay at length upon the ground, parallel with the brook, and about a
rod from its brawling waters. Along the brook side of the tree were
stretched, upon beds of boughs and leaves a dozen or more men, while
two others stirred up the embers of a fire, near them. There were
countless empty tin cans--fire scorched and battered--empty bottles
of every degree of gentility, from the aristocratic, thick bellied
champagne bottle, down to the plebeian blue glass pop, and an iron pot
or two, while rags, bones, and scraps of cold victuals, littered the
ground; and in the log stuck a piece of broken looking-glass with a
fragment of horn comb behind it.
"Gentlemen," said their guide with a courteous wave of the cow bell,
"allow me; _The Hotel de Log!_ Make yourselves to home."