LOUIS'S DOUBLE-DINNER ARGUMENT
After the welcome of the Bornean hunters had spent itself in kissing and
handshaking, the question came up as to why the "Big Four" had abandoned
their explorations after one week in the island instead of three, the
time arranged for them to remain there; and they had fixed the time
themselves.
"I thought three weeks was a rather long time for you to be in the
island," said Captain Ringgold after the question had been opened for
discussion.
"We fixed the time before we knew anything about the island," replied
Louis. "But I want to say, in order to counteract the impression which
appears to prevail in this company, that our trip was not a failure; for
we had a fine time, and enjoyed our trips on the rivers."
"If you had a good time, why did you cut it short by two-thirds of the
period allotted to the excursions?" asked Uncle Moses.
"We went up the Sarawak, the Sadong, and the Simujan, up the last to the
mountains, passing through Lake Padang, and we have shot an
orang-outang, and might have killed more of them, to say nothing of
other game," replied Louis, whom Scott had requested to do the talking.
"We visited three Dyak villages, sailed the Blanchita through a forest,
and killed a good many crocodiles."
"You seem to have had sport enough," added Uncle Moses. "Why did you
give it up in the cream of the thing?"
"I believe you like a good dinner, Uncle Moses; such a dinner as you
always have on board of the Guardian-Mother," continued Louis, who was
evidently pluming himself to make a point.
"I do like a good dinner, and enjoy one very much," replied the worthy
trustee of the young millionaire. "But I doubt if I am any more devoted
to such a banquet as we get every day than my beloved friend, Brother
Adipose Tissue, and all the rest of the voyagers all over the world."
"I plead guilty to the charge of Brother Avoirdupois; and I acknowledge
myself to be a worshipper at the shrine of Mr. Melancthon Sage, and I
invoke a blessing upon the head of Monsieur Odervie, the chief cook. Our
life on the ocean wave is a constant promotive of the appetite. If the
proof of the pudding is not in the eating of the bag, it is in the
eating of the dinners; and I think we pay an abundant tribute to the
talent of Mr. Sage, the prince of stewards, in the quantity of the
well-cooked food he causes to be placed before us."
"We get through dinner about seven o'clock. I see that the accomplished
chief steward is standing at the door," continued Louis. "Now, Mr.
Sage, would it be possible and convenient for you to have another
dinner on the table, say at eight o'clock, an hour after the first feast
had been finished?"
"Quite possible, and even convenient; the only persons to complain of
such an arrangement would be the cooks and stewards," replied Mr. Sage.
"Captain Ringgold, might I so far presume upon any influence I may have
with you as the owner of the Guardian-Mother to request you to order a
second dinner to be served at eight in the evening, beginning, say, with
to-morrow evening?" asked the young millionaire, looking as serious as
though he was about to preach a sermon, though the party were generally
laughing.
"As I have always told you, I take my orders from the owner; and if you
desire such a dinner, I shall certainly give Mr. Sage an order to that
effect," replied the commander.
"But who is to eat the dinner after it is provided, an hour after the
passengers have gorged themselves at the table?" demanded Dr. Hawkes.
"Is this a conspiracy to make more work for the surgeon?"
"Not at all," protested Louis. "It is to give the gentlemen who question
so closely an opportunity to have an abundance of a good thing."
"But we could not eat the dinner," said Uncle Moses. "We are not hogs."
"Oh, you are not!" chuckled the owner.
"But what has all this to do with hunting and exploring in Borneo?"
inquired Mr. Woolridge.
"Well, sir, after we had taken a full dinner in Borneo, Uncle Moses and
the commander ask us why we did not eat another dinner immediately on
the top of it, as I observe that they are not disposed to do on board of
the ship," returned Louis.
Some of the party had penetrated to the conclusion of Louis's argument,
but most of them did not see the point of his illustration till he made
his last remark; then Mr. Woolridge began to clap his hands, and the
whole company applauded vigorously.
"I suppose the interpretation of the whole matter is, that the hunters
in Borneo were gorged with hunting," said Captain Ringgold; "and that
when they stipulated for three weeks of the sport, they overdid the
matter."
"That was precisely the situation, Mr. Commander; and if you had been
with us on the waters of Padang Lake, you could not have defined it
better," replied Louis.
"But it is almost incredible that a quartet of such Nimrods should have
become disgusted with their favorite sport in a single week," added
Captain Ringgold.
"We are not hogs, as Uncle Moses gently suggested, and we could not eat
a second dinner on top of the first so soon. If we had gone to Borneo a
second time, after a reasonable interval, I am confident we should have
enjoyed a second week of hunting, even along the muddy rivers and
inundated jungles," Louis explained.
"In other words, you bit off a bigger mouthful than you could swallow,"
said the commander with a hearty laugh; for he had predicted that three
weeks of hunting at one time was too much. "But we understand the
situation now up to the time of the departure of the Nimrods from their
happy hunting-ground. It was a rather daring enterprise to make a voyage
of nine hundred miles in an open boat; and I should like to ask who was
the originator of the idea."
"If there is any blame for this trip, we were all in the same boat, and
we share the responsibility," answered Louis. "Captain Achang Bakir was
with us; and he has sailed in all the seas of the Archipelago in an open
boat, and we had his advice. Then we sailed all the way to the entrance
of the Gulf of Siam in company with the steamer Delhi, whose captain
agreed to stand by us, and to supply us with coal if we came short."
"That puts a new face on the matter."
"It was in the head waters of the Simujan that the plan was discussed,
and Captain Scott was the originator of the idea," continued Louis. "I
was in favor of it first because it would save the Guardian-Mother the
voyage from Saigon back to Kuching, about a thousand miles."
"Where is Kuching?" asked Dr. Hawkes.
"It is the native name for Sarawak."
"I am heartily glad you have come to us, Louis, for the reason you have
given," added the commander.
"How did the steam-yacht work, Mr. Belgrave?" asked the rajah.
"Exceedingly well, sir; nothing could have done any better; but Mr.
Scott can answer you better than I can, sir."
The third officer of the ship, late captain of the Blanchita, described
the working of the yacht, and gave her liberal praise. He related in
what manner she had beaten the Delhi in the race, and that he had
carried sail all the way nearly from the start. He gave the party the
routine of the boat,--how they had taken their meals, and how they had
slept on board.
"But I think it is time for us to return to the Blanche," interposed
Captain Sharp, as the clock struck eleven.
"I must make an announcement before you go," said Captain Ringgold. "We
shall not be able to sail for Saigon to-morrow morning, as arranged
before. We have to clean the Blanchita in the morning, and she has to be
put on the upper deck of the Blanche. As the Nimrods have come to
Bangkok, I wish to give them a day on shore to see the temples, and call
on the king if they are so disposed. We will sail on Tuesday morning on
the early tide."
"But we have not had any account of the adventures of the Nimrods in
Borneo," suggested Uncle Moses.
"We shall do so at eight o'clock in the morning; and you will all
assemble for the purpose at that time. The lecture on Siam and Cambodia
has been postponed till all hands could hear it; and if General Noury
is ready, that shall follow the adventures," replied the captain.
"I will be here at the time stated, for we all desire to know what the
Nimrods have been doing," replied the general, as the party from the
Blanche retired from the music-room.
The rest of the company went to their staterooms, while the commander
gave his orders for the work of the morning. All hands were called at
daylight; and the young adventurers shook hands with the officers they
found on deck, and spoke a pleasant word to the seamen on duty. The
latter were hoisting the coal, provisions, and stores of the Blanchita
on board of the ship; and by breakfast-time the yacht was as clean as a
Dutch chamber.
At the appointed time the company, including the party from the Blanche,
were seated in the arm-chairs of Conference Hall; and Louis went through
his narrative of the adventures of the Nimrods in Borneo. During the
morning, Achang had placed the stuffed orang-outang on a shelf the
carpenter had erected at the head of the platform, with the proboscis
monkey on one side, and the argus-pheasant on the other. The Bornean had
had some experience as a taxidermist, and Dr. Hawkes declared that he
had done his work well.
Louis explained these specimens, and gave the measurements of the orang.
The proboscis monkey and the bird were also described. When he said he
had not been disposed to shoot monkeys and other harmless animals for
the fun of it, the audience applauded. He had killed a specimen of
several animals, and several pigs, deer, and one bear, most of the
latter for food. The cook had packed the last of the fish in the ice, so
that it had kept well, and it had been served for breakfast that
morning. Everybody had praised it. The surgeon called it the gourami,
and said that some successful attempts had been made to introduce the
fish in American waters.
The audience laughed heartily when Louis related in what manner they had
killed and sold one hundred and eight feet of crocodile for about forty
dollars. He told what he had learned about the Dyaks, and described the
long-house they had visited, and the head-house, and gave the story in
full of Rajah Brooke, and their visits to his nephew and successor, the
present rajah. He might have gone on with his narrative till lunch-time
if he had not known that General Noury was waiting for him to finish his
account.
"Did you see the Dyak women, Louis?" asked his mother.
"Plenty of them. The older ones reminded me of the French women; for
when they begin to grow old, they wrinkle and dry up. The morality of
the Dyaks is much higher in tone, even among the laboring-classes, men
and women, than in civilized countries. They are all honest; and they
steal nothing, even in Kuching, though the Malays and Chinamen do it for
them."
"Were the young women pretty, Mr. Belgrave?" inquired Mrs. Woolridge.
"To a Dyak gentleman I suppose they are; but I was not fascinated with
them, though I saw some on the Simujan who were not bad looking. The
prettiest one I saw was at a village near the mountains. But the general
is waiting for me to finish, and I must answer no more questions at
present," replied the speaker, as he bowed, and hastened from the
rostrum.
Then it was found that Mr. Gaskette had not hung up the map of Cochin
China, for Achang and the carpenter had taken up the space before
appropriated to it. Mr. Stevens, the carpenter, suggested a way to get
over the difficulty; but it would take him half an hour to put up a
frame in front of the orang.
"I shall not be able to get half through Cochin China before
lunch-time," said General Noury, consulting his watch.
"I am afraid your audience will be scatterbrained, General, there is so
much going on about the decks. Perhaps we had better postpone the
lecture till after we have sailed to-morrow morning, especially as the
Nimrods will be on shore this afternoon," suggested the commander.
"I approve the suggestion; let it be adopted."
The Blanche party lunched on board, and spent the afternoon there.