About this period (1797) the three experimental regiments[3] were
ordered to be formed, viz., the 22nd, 34th, and 65th regiments; the
former at Colchester. I was, one morning in that year, about the month
of January or February, busily employed in a field close by my master's
house, when, who should I see but one of the parish officers making
towards me, with a large paper in his hand. I began to muster and parade
my crimes, but found, on a fair review, that I had done nothing that
merited the interference of an officer; so I stood up boldly till he
approached me, and smilingly said, "Shipp, I have frequently heard of,
and observed your great wish to go for a soldier." He then read the
paragraph, and asked me if I was willing to go; for that, if I was, the
parish would rig me out decently, and that he would take me to
Colchester. My little heart was in my mouth; I repeated his words,
"Willing to go!" and eagerly assured him of the rapture with which I
accepted his offer. The affair was soon concluded; so down went my
shovel, and off I marched, whistling, "See, the conquering hero comes."
By four o'clock of the same day, to the honour and praise of the parish
be it spoken, I was rigged out in my new leather tights, new coat, new
hat, new shoes, new everything--of which I was not a little proud. I
begged, as a particular favour, that I might sport colours in my hat;
and even this was permitted to my vanity, as long as I remained in the
town. I took an affectionate leave of all my old playfellows and my good
mistress; and even my cruel master was not neglected by me, for I never
had malice or unforgiveness in my disposition. The next day, by seven
o'clock in the morning, I was on my way to Colchester; and, when I was
seated on the front seat of the coach, I would not have exchanged
situations with the grand pasha of Egypt, or the king upon the throne of
that land of which I was a native. Scarcely had I seated myself, and
adjusted my feet in a safe situation, than I indulged my coach
companions by whistling several martial airs; but, coming to a
well-known turn of the road, from which you take the farewell peep at
Saxmundham, as much as I loved my king, I stopped short in the middle of
the national anthem, and my eye bent its way instinctively towards my
native village, where I first saw the light of heaven, and rested on the
little village spire, which reared its Gothic head over the remains of
my poor mother. Towards this painfully interesting object I looked and
looked, till the place of my nativity was buried from my sight by the
surrounding trees. When bereft of this view, I felt pensive and sad, and
could only console myself by reflecting, that I did not fly from my
parental roof; nor was I deserting aged parents, or unprotected sisters,
for I had no one to bewail my departure. Yet I could not help feeling
that I left something behind me that hung like a magnet to my heart;
with all my misfortunes, all my cares and troubles, still I could not
quit, without a pang, the place of my birth, and the tomb of my beloved
mother. At last, three gentlemen on the coach, having heard my history
from the person who accompanied me, cheered me up by saying, that they
knew the corps I was going to, and that they were all lads like myself.
This notice from strangers so enlivened me, that I began to regard
myself as no small personage, and I talked as much as any of them, until
we arrived at an inn in Colchester, where we dined. Here I was marched
off to the colonel of the corps in which I was to serve; from the
colonel to the adjutant; from the adjutant to the sergeant-major; from
the sergeant-major to the drum-major; and thence to his wife, an old
drunken Irish woman, but as good a creature as ever drank whisky. In the
custody of this lady, the friend who came with me left me, first giving
me a hearty shake of the hand, and wishing me every happiness. I must
confess I felt now quite deserted: about twenty boys gathered round me,
and I soon found that my fine leathers were the subject of their
ridicule and laughter; some of them crying out, "Bill, twig his
leathers!"--"Smoke his new coat!"--"My eye! what a buck!"--"Some
gemman's son, I suppose, run away from his daddy!"--"Never mind," said
another, "we'll soon drill his leathers into hot rolls and butter." Here
my friend Maggy, the Irish woman, interposed her aid in my behalf.
"Arrah!" said she, "what are you gazing at, you set of spalpeens, you?
Be off, you set of thaves, or I will be after breaking some of your
nasty dirty mugs for you. Arrah! don't mind them; sure they are nothing
at all but a set of monkeys just catched. Come here, honey, and let me
see who will be after laying a finger on you." Here she seated me by her
side, rubbed my chin, patted my back, eyed my coat and breeches, and
asked me if I had got any pence in my pocket, with which she should get
me some hot rolls and butter, for _ta_. I gave her a shilling, and she
brought two rolls and butter. The residue I suppose she spent in gin,
for she began to give me some of her Irish hugs; so much so, that I
wished myself at a greater distance. One of the boys cried out, "Ask for
the change--ask her for the change, or she will do you." At this
imputation Maggy got on her legs, and, seizing a large trencher,
tottered, or rather staggered, towards the boy, and exclaimed, "You
great big blackguard, you, do you want to rob me of my name? Take that,
and bad luck to you!" Here she hurled the trencher at him, but the
effort carried old Maggy off her legs, and she exhibited her gigantic
figure on the floor, to the amusement of all the barrack. I could not
help laughing heartily, though I found I had got among a queer set; when
the drum-major entering, and seeing his wife on the floor, vociferated,
"Get up, you old drunken hag; or, by St. Patrick! and that's no small
oath, but I'll pay you off." Here Maggy made an effort to rise, but the
drop had done her up; and I was obliged to give her a helping hand, and
she was put to bed, clothes and all.
[Illustration: SAXMUNDHAM CHURCH]
On the following morning I was taken to a barber's, and deprived of my
curly brown locks. My hair curled beautifully, but in a minute my poor
little head was nearly bald, except a small patch behind, which was
reserved for a future operation. I was then paraded to the tailor's
shop, and deprived of my new clothes--coat, leathers, and hat--for which
I received, in exchange, red jacket, red waistcoat, red pantaloons, and
red foraging-cap. The change, or metamorphosis, was so complete, that I
could hardly imagine it to be the same dapper little fellow. I was
exceedingly tall for a boy of ten years of age; but, notwithstanding
this, my clothes were much too large: my sleeves were two or three
inches over my hands, or rather longer than my fingers; and the whole
hung on me, to use a well-known expression, like a purser's shirt on a
hand-spike. My pride was humbled, my spirits drooped, and I followed the
drum-major, hanging my head like a felon going to the place of
execution. I cut such a queer figure, that all who met me turned round
and stared at me. At last, I mustered up courage enough to ask one
little chap what he was staring at, when he replied, "Ask my eye, Johnny
Raw;" at the same time adding his extended fingers and thumb to the
length of his nose. Passing some drummers on their way to practice, I
got finely roasted. "Twig the raw-skin!"--"Smoke his pantaloons!"--"Them
there trousers is what I calls a knowing cut!"--"Look at the sign of the
Red Man!" &c., &c. Under this kind of file-firing I reached my barrack,
where I was doomed to undergo the same routine of quizzing, till at
length I got nettled, and told one of the boys, if he did not let me
alone, I should take the liberty of giving him a good threshing. This
"pluck," as they termed it, silenced most of my tormentors, and I was
permitted, for a time, to remain unmolested. In this interval the
drum-major went out, having first put my leathers, &c., into his box, of
which he took the key. I sat myself down on a stool, which might not
inaptly have been styled the stool of repentance; for here I began first
to think that soldiering did not possess quite so much delight as I had
pictured to myself. Still I resolved to put a good face on the matter,
and so mixed with my comrades, and in an hour was as free and as much at
home with them all as if I had known them for years. The drift of my new
acquaintances, in being thus easily familiar with me, was soon apparent;
for one of the knowing ones among them called me aside, and asked me if
I knew where to sell my coloured clothes; as, if not, he would go with
me, and show me. I told him that the drum-major had them. "Yes," replied
he, "I know he has; but you see as how he has no business with them.
Them there traps should be sold, and you get the money they brings; and
if you don't keep your eye on the fugleman, he will do you out of half
of them." He further said, that, when he enlisted, he got more than five
shillings for his things. I replied, that of course the drum-major would
either sell them for my benefit, or permit me to do it; and, if the
latter, that I should be thankful for his kindness. At this moment he
entered, when the boy, who had just spoken to me, approached him, and
said, pointing to me, "That there chap says as how he wants to sell
them things of his in your box, and that I am to go with him, to show
him the place where I sold my things." To this falsehood I could not
submit, and I therefore went up to the drum-major, and said, "Sir, I
said nothing of the kind; all I said was, that I supposed you would
either dispose of the things for my benefit, or allow me to do
so."--"Yes, yes," said the drum-major, "that's all right; I will sell
them for you, and you shall have the money." The boy here turned upon
his heel, muttering something like _fudge!_ and the things were put into
a handkerchief and carried off into the town. When the drum-major had
left us, the same boy came up to me, and called me a liar, stating that
he had a great mind to thresh me; and, as a proof of his inclination, he
attempted to seize my nose between his finger and thumb. I got in a
rage, and told him, if he ventured to touch me, I would fell him to the
ground; when all the boys gathered round us, and said, "Well done,
Johnny Raw!"--"Well done, old leather-breeches!"--"That's right, Johnny
Wapstraw!" Finding that I did not venture to strike the first blow, my
antagonist called me a coward. This I knew I was not; so, as I could
submit to his insolence no longer, I struck him, and to it we went in
right earnest. After half a dozen rounds my opponent gave in. This, my
first victory, established that I was neither a coward nor to be hoaxed
with impunity. Eulogiums were showered down upon me, and the shouting
and uproar were beyond description. I understood afterwards that he was
a great bully, and always fighting. Our boxing-match had just concluded,
when the drum-major entered, and produced the proceeds of my clothes;
viz., L1 1s. 6d. for a new hat, coat, waistcoat, and leathers: a fair
price, some said; while others thought they ought to have fetched thirty
shillings; but I was very well satisfied, and stood hot rolls and butter
to all around, not forgetting my antagonist, who shook hands, and said
it was the first time he had ever been beaten, and that he would some
day, in friendship, have another trial. I assured him that I should be
at any time at his service, and thus this matter ended.
After this I went into town, to purchase a few requisites, such as a
powder-bag, puff, soap, candles, grease, &c.; and, having procured what
I stood in need of, I returned to my barrack, where I underwent the
operation of having my hair tied for the first time, to the no small
amusement of all the boys assembled. A large piece of candle-grease was
applied, first to the sides of my head, then to the hind long hair;
after this, the same kind of operation was performed with nasty stinking
soap--sometimes the man who was dressing me applying his knuckles,
instead of the soap, to the delight of the surrounding boys, who were
bursting their sides with laughter, to see the tears roll down my
cheeks. When this operation was over, I had to go through one of a more
serious nature. A large pad, or bag filled with sand, was poked into the
back of my head, round which the hair was gathered tight, and the whole
tied round with a leather thong. When I was dressed for parade, I could
scarcely get my eyelids to perform their office; the skin of my eyes and
face was drawn so tight by the plug that was stuck in the back of my
head, that I could not possibly shut my eyes; add to this, an enormous
high stock was poked under my chin; so that, altogether, I felt as stiff
as if I had swallowed a ramrod, or a sergeant's halberd. Shortly after I
was thus equipped, dinner was served; but my poor jaws refused to act on
the offensive, and when I made an attempt to eat, my pad behind went up
and down like a sledge-hammer.
In the evening I went to parade, and was inspected by the colonel, who
said I was a promising lad, but that my clothes did not fit, which he
ordered to be altered. At this moment the master of the band came up to
the colonel, and said that he should like to have me in the band, to
learn the flute and to beat the triangles. This request was granted, and
I was the following day removed to the band-room, and commenced my
musical avocations; and in six months I had beaten the sides of the
triangles nearly as thin as my own, and had also become a tolerable
flute-player: but, as at that time we got several volunteers from the
militia, among whom were two excellent flute-players, I was removed back
to the drummer's room, and put to the fife. In a short time I was made
fife-major--no small office, I assure you. I wore two stripes and a
tremendous long sash, which almost touched the ground. As the reader may
suppose, I was not a little proud of my new office; I began to ride the
high horse among my old comrades, and to show my authority by enforcing
obedience by very powerful arguments; for I was permitted to carry a
small cane, and to use it too. In the absence of the drum-major, which
was frequent, I carried the silver-headed stick, some seven feet long,
and when we furnished the band for general guard-mounting, I astonished
the spectators with my double demi-semi twist of my cane, and began to
think myself one of the brightest of the bright. At this period the
regiment moved to the Hythe, about a mile from Colchester, and twice a
day we beat through the streets, followed by all the girls and boys in
the town, some of the rosy-cheeked beauties begging me to play favourite
tunes of theirs. These entreaties for particular airs were urged with
such pathos, accompanied with such fascinating smiles and leers, that
the fife-major occasionally vouchsafed to comply, always, however,
keeping up his dignity, by making a compliance with such requests appear
a great condescension. I strutted about the town with my little cane
under my arm, like some great man of eminent consequence, whom the
community could not do without; became a great favourite with all my
officers; was happy and contented; and time passed imperceptibly and
very pleasantly away. Meantime, I grew very tall, though somewhat
slender; and my red coat had been thrown off, for which was substituted
a splendid white silver-laced jacket, with two small silver epaulettes,
which my swagger induced to fan the evening breeze.
My days were now comparatively cloudless; yet still my youthful tricks
had not entirely left me. Some of these frequently led me into scrapes
and unpleasant predicaments. The following were among the frolics with
which I at this time diverted myself: viz., filling the pipes of my
comrades with gunpowder; putting a lighted candle in their hands while
asleep, then tickling their noses with a straw; tying their great toes
together, then crying out fire; blacking their hands with soot, then
tickling their ears and noses, to induce them to scratch themselves, and
thus to black their faces all over; putting lighted paper between their
toes when asleep; pulling the stools from behind them when in the act of
sitting down; sewing their shirts to their bedding when asleep: all
these, with fifty more, I regret to say, were in those days my constant
delight and practice. These mischievous pranks led me into many a fight,
but that did not discourage me. I had a natural propensity to tease
people; and, as I did not scruple to indulge it, you may be sure I did
not escape without my share of tricks in return. He who plays at fives,
says the old proverb, must expect rubbers; and accordingly, one day,
when I was sitting upstairs, a hundred voices bawled out, "Pass the word
for the fife-major; the adjutant wants him." I bounced down in an
instant, and soon found that the whole barrack were in a roar of
laughter at my expense; for, to the tail of my coat was attached a large
sheet of paper with these words in legible characters, "The Biter Bit."
To have evinced any displeasure at this hoax, would only have served to
render me more ridiculous, and to increase the hooting and laughter at
my expense; so I joined in the laugh, and affected to think it a
remarkably good joke.
About this period a circumstance happened which, in some degree,
blighted my pride, and almost cooled my military zeal. It was nutting
season: I made a party to go, and we arrived at the wood, where the
filberts hung as thick as laurels on a soldier's brow. We had not bagged
more than a bushel, when we were pounced upon by three keepers, and
taken prisoners to the barracks. The three boys who were my companions
on this excursion got two dozen stripes; I lost my two as fife-major,
and was turned back to my original post as drummer, or rather as fifer.
This severe punishment did not arise from the enormity of purloining the
nuts, but from the fact of our being found some four miles from the
cantonment. Under these circumstances we might have been taken up as
deserters, and the keepers have received two pounds each man; so that,
upon the whole, we had reason to be grateful that the more serious
offence was not urged against us.
Shortly after this unfortunate occurrence, the regiment was ordered to
proceed to the barracks at Hilsea, Portsmouth. This was soldiering in
clover; and good living, fresh scenes, faces, and events, conspired to
make me, in a measure, forget the stripes which I had lost. I was not
long on the march, before I became as knowing as the best of them, and
was soon well versed in the tricks of the road. I found that it was the
practice of some of the landlords to give us fat pea-soup, and of others
to regale us with greasy suet dumplings, as heavy as lead, by way of
taking off the edge of our appetites. These dishes I invariably avoided,
stating that they were injurious to my constitution, or that the doctors
had forbidden me to eat such food. I therefore waited for the more
substantial fare--the roast and the boiled--which I attacked with such
zest, as could not fail to convince the landlord of the delicacy of my
constitution, and of the absolute necessity of my refraining from less
substantial diet. In two hours after dinner the duff and pea-soup eaters
were as hungry as ever; but I kept my own counsel, and thus was enabled
to go on my way with a smiling countenance that indicated good and
substantial fare.
When we were treated in the scurvy way I have spoken of by the landlords
on our line of march, we never failed to leave some token of our
displeasure behind us. Thus, one day at Chelmsford, we were compelled to
submit to dreadful bad quarters; and even the extreme delicacy of my
constitution, which had so often succeeded with me before, could not, on
this occasion, induce our host to give us anything but greasy puddings
and fat stews, made of the offal of his house for the last month. The
fat on the top of this heterogeneous mixture was an inch thick; and I,
for my own part, protested that I could not and would not eat it.
Finding me so positive, he privately slipped a shilling into my hand to
quiet me, which I did not think it expedient to refuse. This bribe
tended, in some degree, to pacify me; but my comrades, on quitting the
house, evinced their disapprobation of the treatment they had met with,
by writing with a lighted candle on the ceiling, "D----d bad
quarters--How are you off for pea-soup?--Lead dumplings--Lousy
beds--Dirty sheets."
This was the mildest description of punishment with which we visited
landlords who incurred our displeasure; for, in addition to this, it did
not require any very aggravated treatment to induce us to teach some of
mine host's ducks and geese to march part of the way on the road with
us; to wit, until we could get them dressed.
These birds would sometimes find their way into drums. I was once myself
a party concerned in a pilfering of this kind--at least, indirectly so;
for I was accessory to the act of stealing a fine goose--a witness of
its death, or rather, what we supposed its death--and an assistant in
_drumming_ it. Moreover, I do not doubt that I should have willingly
lent a hand towards eating it also. The goose, however, was, in our
opinion at least, very snugly secured, and we commenced our march
without the least fear of detection, chuckling in our sleeves how
completely we had eluded the landlord's vigilance. The bird only wanted
dressing to complete the joke, and discussion was running high among us
as to how that could be accomplished, when, to our astonishment, who
should pass us on horseback but the landlord himself! He rode very
coolly by, and, as he took no sort of notice of us, we concluded that he
might very probably have other business on the road, and for a time we
thought nothing more of the matter; but what were our feelings when, on
halting in the market-place, we perceived this very landlord in earnest
conversation with our colonel; and, to all appearance, "laying down the
law," as it is called, in a most strenuous manner. At last, the colonel
and he moved towards us; on perceiving which my knees broke into
double-quick time, and my heart into a full gallop. On arriving near to
the spot where our guilty party was drawn up, the colonel, addressing
us, stated that, "the gentleman who stood by his side, complained that
he had lost one of his geese, and had informed him he had good reason to
suspect that some of the party to whom he now spoke had stolen it." For
the satisfaction of "the gentleman," whom we, one and all, most heartily
wished under ground, our knapsacks were ordered to be examined, and
underwent the most scrupulous inspection; but no goose was to be found.
Professing his regret for the trouble he had caused, and apparently
satisfied that his suspicions were ill-founded, our worthy landlord was
just on the point of leaving us, and the boys around were grinning with
delight at the notion of having so effectually deceived him, when, to
our utter confusion and dismay, the goose, at this very juncture, gave a
deep groan, and the landlord protested roundly that "that there sound
was from his goose." Upon this, the investigation was renewed with
redoubled ardour; our great coats were turned inside out, and, in short,
almost everything belonging to us was examined with the minutest
attention; but still no goose was to be found. The officers could not
refrain from smiling, and the boys began again to grin at the fun; but
this merriment was doomed to be but of short duration, for the poor
goose, now in its last moments, uttered another groan, more loud and
mournful than the former one. In fact, the vital spark had just taken
its flight; and this might be construed into the last dying speech of
the ill-fated bird, and a full confession of its dreadful situation and
murder. The drum, in which the now defunct goose was confined, stood
close against the landlord's elbow, and his ear was, unfortunately for
us, so correct in ascertaining whence the sound of woe proceeded, that
he at once roared out, "Dang my buttons, if my goose bean't in that
there drum!" These words were daggers to our souls; we made sure of as
many stripes on our backs as there were feathers on the goose's; and our
merriment was suddenly changed into mortification and despair. The
drum-head was ordered to be taken off, and sure enough there lay poor
goosey, as dead as a herring. The moment the landlord perceived it, he
protested that "as he was a sinner, that was his goose." This assertion
there was no one among us hardy enough to deny; and the colonel desired
that the goose should be given up to the publican, assuring him, at the
same time, that he should cause the offenders to be severely punished
for the theft which had been committed. Fortunately for our poor backs,
we now found a truly humane and kind-hearted man in the landlord whom we
had offended; for, no sooner did he find that affairs were taking a more
serious turn than he had contemplated, and that it was likely that he
should be the cause of getting a child flogged, than he affected to
doubt the identity of the goose; and, at length, utterly disclaimed it,
saying to the colonel, "This is none of mine, Sir; I see it has a black
spot on the back, whereas mine was pure white; besides, it has a black
head: I wish you a good morning, Sir, and am very sorry for the trouble
I have given you." Thus saying, he left us, muttering, as he went along,
"Get a child flogged for a tarnation old goose? no, no!" Every step he
took carried a ton weight off our hearts. Notwithstanding this generous
conduct in the publican, who was also, by his own acknowledgment a
sinner, our colonel saw very clearly how matters stood; but, in
consideration of our youth, and that this was our first offence--at
least that had been discovered--he contented himself with severely
admonishing us; and the business ended, shortly after, with the
demolition of the goose--roasted.
We remained at Hilsea Barracks for nearly a year, where we acquired the
appellation of the "Red Knights," from our clothing being all of that
colour. I do not recollect anything of importance that occurred to me at
that place, except that I was condemned to pass a week in the black-hole
there, for what the soldiers called "eating my shoes." This punishment I
brought upon myself in the following manner. I had been out to receive
my half-mounting, consisting of a pair of shoes, a shirt, two pair of
stockings, and a stock; and, on my way home, as ill-luck would have it,
an old woman, with whom I had frequently before had dealings, and who
was well known, among us by the title of the plum-pudding woman,
happened to throw herself in my way. Her pudding was smoking hot, I was
exceedingly hungry, and my mouth watered so at the tempting sight, that
I could not drag myself away. But, much as I longed for a slice, what
was to be done? I had no money, and my friend the plum-pudding woman was
by far too old a soldier to give trust till pay-day.[4] The pudding,
however, it was impossible for me to dispense with; and finding,
therefore, that all my promises and entreaties, with the view of
obtaining credit, were fruitless, I at length, in an evil hour, incited
by the savoury smell which issued from the old woman's basket, proposed
to her to buy my shoes. After a good deal of bargaining, we at length
came to an understanding, by which it was agreed, that in consideration
of a quarter of a yard of pudding, and a shilling to be to me paid and
delivered, my new shoes were to be handed over to the dealer in
plum-pudding, as her own proper goods and chattels.
This contract being honourably completed on both sides, I retreated to a
solitary shed to eat my _duff_ (the name by which this description of
pudding was well known among us), where without any great exertion, I
soon brought the two extremities of my quarter of a yard together. The
last mouthful put me to the extremity of my wits to devise how I could
possibly account for the sudden disappearance of my shoes. My first
impulse was to run in search of the old woman, and endeavour, by fair
promises, to coax her out of the shoes again; but I soon found that no
such chance was left me, for she had made a precipitate retreat from the
place where we had transacted our business together, knowing well that
she was punishable for having bought such articles of me. Nothing
appeared to be now left for me but a palpable falsehood; and, although
of this I had a great abhorrence, yet I really had not sufficient
courage to think of avowing the literal truth. At length I thought I had
hit upon a sort of compromise, and I determined to say that I had
dropped my shoes on my way home; which, though not exactly the fact, yet
approached nearer to the truth than anything else I could devise, likely
to serve my end. As on all other occasions of the kind, however, it
appeared that I might just as well have made a full confession at
once--for my statement was not believed--and as I could not in any other
way account satisfactorily for the elopement of my shoes, I was ordered
seven days' black-hole for the purpose of refreshing my memory. Against
this punishment I prayed long and loudly, but all to no purpose; so,
with the remainder of my day's rations under my arm, off I was marched,
not much elated with the dreary prospect before me. When I heard the
door of the cell creak upon its hinges behind me, and the huge key grate
in the lock, I began to think that I had parted with my shoes too cheap,
and, for some time after, I sat myself down in a corner, and brooded in
melancholy mood over the misfortune which I had by my own folly brought
upon myself. But I was never one of the desponding kind; and it
therefore soon occurred to me, that, instead of indulging in dismal
reflections, it would be far wiser, and more pleasant, to devise some
means by which I might contrive to amuse myself during the period of my
confinement. Seven days and seven nights appeared to me at first to be a
long time to remain encaged in darkness; and yet there was certainly
something soldier-like in the situation. The mere fact of being a
prisoner had a military sound with it. To be sure, I was imprisoned for
having eaten my shoes; but what of that? Was it not quite as easy for
me to imagine myself a prisoner of war? Certainly it was; and
accordingly, with this impression strong on my mind, I dropped into a
profound sleep in the midst of my meditations, and dreamed that I was
deposited in this dungeon by the chance of war. On waking I found myself
extremely cold, from which I inferred that it would be necessary for me
to contrive some plan by which I might comfort my body as well as my
mind; and I therefore immediately set about standing on my head, walking
on my hands, tumbling head over heels, and similar gymnastic exercises.
In this manner, sleeping and playing by turns, I managed to pass my time
in the black-hole for one whole day and night, by no means unpleasantly;
when, about nine o'clock the next morning, I heard the well-known voice
of the drum-major asking for me, and desiring that I might be liberated.
On hearing this order given, I presumed that, of course, my period of
captivity had expired: and, although the time certainly appeared to have
passed off at a wonderfully rapid rate, yet I accounted for it by
considering that I had slept away the greater part of it; and, in
addition to this, that it was but natural it should seem to have passed
quickly, since I had been, during the whole period, exempt from parades,
drills, head-soaping, &c. When I first got into the daylight, I could
scarcely open my eyes; and, no sooner had I brought my optics into a
state to endure the light, than I was asked by the drum-major how I
liked my new abode, and if I was ready to return to it. I perceived,
from the smile which accompanied these questions, that I had little
further to fear, and I soon understood that I had only spent one day and
one night in the black-hole, and that the remainder of my sentence had
been remitted. I was hailed by all my comrades, as if I had been cast
on, and escaped from, some desolate island; and, having macadamized my
inward man with six penny pies, out of the shilling I had received from
the old pudding-woman--of which I was still possessed--I was soon as fit
for fun again as the best of them.
But, the regiment being now about to embark for Guernsey, I will
commence our voyage in a new chapter.
[Illustration]
[Illustration]
FOOTNOTES:
[3] The object of government in forming these "experimental regiments,"
as they were called, was to relieve parishes of boys, from the age of
ten to sixteen, who were allowed to enlist, on the parish paying the
expenses of their journey to some recruiting depot. Each of these
regiments was composed of a thousand boys, who made such excellent
soldiers, that it appears extraordinary no such plan was ever again
adopted; the three regiments here spoken of having been the only corps
formed in this way.
[Some additional particulars, obtained from the War Office records, will
be found in the introduction to this edition.--ED.]
[4] Soldiers were then paid once in each month.--ED.