Mary had been down the street, shopping. "I'll drop in and visit with
John a few minutes," she thought, as she drew near the office. When she
entered her husband was at the telephone with his back toward her.
"Hello. What is it?"
"Shake up your 'phone, I can't hear a word you're saying."
"Who?"
"Oh, yes, _I_ know." Exasperation was in every letter of every word.
"Take one every six months and let me hear from you when they're all
gone." Slam! "There's always _some_ damned thing," he muttered, and
turning faced his wife.
"A surprising prescription, John. What does it mean?"
"It means that she's one of these everlasting complainers and that I'm
tired of hearing her. She's been to Chicago and St. Louis and
Cincinnati. She's had three or four laparotomies and every time she
comes back to me with a longer story and a worse one. They've got about
everything but her appendix and they'll get that if she don't watch
out."
"Why, I thought they always got that the first thing."
"You have no idea how it tires a man to have people come to him and
complain, complain, _complain_. The story is ever new to them but it
gets mighty old to the doctor. Then they go away to the city and some
surgeon with a great name does what may seem to him to be best.
Sometimes they come back improved, sometimes not, and sometimes they
come back worse than when they went. In all probability the operator
never sees the patient again and so the last chapters of the story must
be told to the home doctor over and over again."
Mary gave a little sigh. The doctor went on:
"In many cases it isn't treatment of any kind that is needed. It is
occupation--occupation for the mind and for the hands. Something that
will make people forget themselves in their work or in their play."
Ting-a-ling-ling-ling. Ting-a-ling-ling-ling.
"Is this you, Doctor?"
"Yes."
"I wanted to see if you were at the office. I'll be over there right
away."
In a few minutes the door opened and a gentleman about thirty-five years
of age entered. His manner was greatly agitated and he did not notice
Mrs. Blank at the window near the corner of the room.
"Good morning, Mr. Blake," said the doctor, shaking hands with him,
"back again, are you?"
Mr. Blake had been to C--, his native city. He had not been well for
some time and had evinced a desire to go back and consult his old
physician there, in which Dr. Blank had heartily concurred.
"How long do you think I can live?" Mr. Blake asked now.
"What do you mean?" replied the doctor, regarding him closely.
"I want to know how much time I have. I want to get my business fixed up
before--"
"Blake, you couldn't die if you wanted to. You're not a sick enough man
for that."
The patient took a letter from his pocket and handed it in silence to
the doctor. The latter took it, looked carefully at the superscription,
read it slowly through, then folded it with cool deliberation and put it
back into the envelope.
"I thought you were going to your old physician," he said.
"Dr. Kenton was out of the city so I went to the great specialist."
"Did he tell you what was in this letter he sent to me?"
"No, but the letter was not sealed and I read it. I was so anxious to
know his opinion that I couldn't help it. Tuberculosis of the larynx--"
his voice faltered.
"Yes," said the doctor, calmly, "that is a thing a man may well be
frightened about. But listen to me, Blake. You've not got tuberculosis
of the larynx."
"Do you think a great physician like Dr. Wentworth doesn't know what he
is talking about?"
"Dr. Wentworth is a great physician; I know him well. But he is only a
man like the rest of us and therefore liable to err in judgment
sometimes. He knew you half an hour, perhaps, before he pronounced upon
your case. I have known you and watched you for fifteen years. I say you
have not got tuberculosis _and I know I am right_."
Mary saw Mr. Blake grasp her husband's hand with a look in his face that
made her think within herself, "Blessings on the country doctor wherever
he may be, who has experience and knowledge and wisdom enough to draw
just and true conclusions of his own and bravely state them when
occasion demands."
When the patient had gone Mary said to her husband, "One gets a
kaleidoscopic view of life in a doctor's office. What comes through the
ear at home comes before the eye here. The kaleidoscope turned a
bright-colored bit into the place of a dark one this time, John. I am
glad I was here to see."
As she spoke footsteps were heard on the stairs. Slow and feeble steps
they were, but at last they reached the landing and paused at the open
door. Looking out Mary saw a poorly clad woman perhaps forty years of
age, carrying in her hands a speckled hen. She was pale and trembling
violently, and sank down exhausted into the chair the doctor set for
her. He took the hen from her hands and set it on the floor. Its feet
were securely tied and it made no effort to escape. The doctor had never
seen the woman before but noting the emaciated form and the hectic flush
on the cheek he saw that consumption was fast doing its work. Mary took
the palm leaf fan lying on the table and stood beside her, fanning her
gently.
When the woman could speak she said, "I oughtn't to 'a' tried to walk,
Doctor, but there didn't seem to be anyone passin' an' this cough is
killin' me. I want something for it."
"How far did you walk?" asked Mary, kindly.
"Four mile."
"Four miles!" she looked down at the trembling form with deep pity in
her brown eyes.
"I didn't have any money, Doctor, but will the hen pay for the
medicine?" her eyes were raised anxiously to his face and Mary's eyes
met the look in the eyes of her husband.
"I don't want the hen. We haven't any place to keep her. Besides my
wife, here, is afraid of hens." A little smile flitted across the wan
face.
He told her how to take the medicine and then said, "Whenever you need
any more let me know and I'll send it to you. You needn't worry about
the pay."
"I'm very much obleeged to you, Doctor."
"Just take the hen back home with you."
"I wonder if I couldn't sell her at the store," she said, looking at the
doctor with a bright, expectant face.
"Wait here and rest awhile and then we'll see about it. I'll go down and
perhaps I can find some one in town from out your way that you can ride
home with. Where do you live?" She told him and he went down the stairs.
In a little while he came back.
"One of your neighbors is down here now waiting for you. He's just
starting home," he said. He took the hen and as they started down the
stairs Mary came out and joined them. At the foot of the stairway he
said to the grocer standing in front of his establishment, "Here,
Keller, I want you to give me a dollar for this hen."
"She ain't worth it."
"She _is_ worth it," said the doctor so emphatically that Keller put his
hand in his pocket and handed out the dollar. The poor woman did not see
the half dollar that passed from the doctor's hand to the grocer's, but
Mary saw and was glad.
The doctor laid the dollar in the trembling palm, helped the feeble
woman into the wagon and they drove off.
Mary turned to her husband and said with a little break in her voice,
"I'm going home, John. I want to get away from your kaleidoscope."
Ting-a-ling-ling-ling. Ting-a-ling-ling-ling.
"And I must go for another peep into it. Good-bye. Come again."
* * * * *
"Is this Dr. Blank?"
"Yes."
"This is Jim Sampson, Doctor, out at Sampson's mill. My boy fell out of
a tree a while ago and broke his leg, and I'm sort o' worried about it."
"It don't have to _stay_ broke, you know."
"That's just the point. I'm afraid it will--for a while at least."
"What do you mean?"
"Why, my wife says she won't have it set unless the signs are right for
setting a broken bone. She's great on the almanac signs."
"The devil! You have that bone _set_--_today_! Do you understand?"
"Yes, but Mary's awful set in her way."
"I'm a darned sight more set. That boy's not going to lie there and
suffer because of a fool whim of his mother's. Where is she? Send her to
the 'phone and I'll talk to _her_."
"She couldn't find her almanac and ran across to the neighbor's to get
one."
"Call me when she gets back."
Ten minutes passed and the call came.
"It's all right, Doctor, the signs says so."
A note of humor but of unmistakable relief vibrated in the voice.
"Come right out."
"All right, Jim, I'll be out as soon as I make my round here in town.
Tell your wife to have that almanac handy. I may learn something from
it."
An hour or two later he was starting out to get into the buggy, with
splints and other needful things when the 'phone called him back.
Hastily cramming them under the seat he went.
"Hello."
"Is this Dr. Blank?"
"This is Millie Hastings. Do you remember me?"
"No-o--I don't believe I do."
"You doctored me."
"Yes, I've 'doctored' several people."
"I had typhoid fever two years ago up in the country at my uncle's."
"What's your uncle's name?"
"Henry Peters."
"Yes, I remember now."
"I wanted to find out what my bill is."
"Wait here a moment till I look at the book."
In a minute he had found it: Millie Hastings--so many visits at such and
such a date, amounting to thirty-six dollars. He went back to the
'phone.
"Do you make your money by working by the week?"
"Yes, sir."
"Have you learned how to save it?"
"Yes, sir, I had to. I have to help mother."
"Your bill is eighteen dollars."
He heard a little gasp, then a delighted voice said: "I was afraid it
would be a good deal more. And now Dr. Blank, I want to ask a favor of
you."
"Ask away."
"I brought four dollars to town with me today to pay on my bill, but I
want a rocking chair _so_ bad--I'm over here at the furniture store
now--and there's such a nice one here that just costs four dollars and I
thought maybe you'd wait a----"
"_Certainly_ I will. Get the rocking chair by all means," and he laughed
heartily as he went out to the buggy. He climbed in and drove away, the
smile still lingering on his face. At the outskirts of the town a tall
girl hailed him from the sidewalk. He stopped.
"I was just going to your office to get my medicine," she said.
"I left it with the man there. He'll give it to you."
"Must I take it just like the other?"
"Yes. Laugh some, though, just before you take it."
"Why?"
"Because you won't feel like it afterward."
The girl looked after him as he drove on.
"He's laughing," she said to herself and a grin overspread her face as
she pursued her leisurely way.
* * * * *
Ting-a-ling-ling-ling-ling-ling-ling!!!
"Must be something unusual," thought Mary as the doctor went to the
'phone.
"Doctor, is this you?"
"Yes."
"Come out to John Lansing's quick!"
"What's the matter?"
"My wife swallowed poison. Hurry, Doctor, for God's sake!"
In a few minutes the doctor was on his horse (the roads being too bad
for a buggy) and was off. We will follow him as he plunges along through
the darkness.
Because of the mud the horse's progress was so slow that the doctor
pulled him to one side, urged him on to the board walk, much against his
inclination, and went clattering on at such a pace that the doors began
to fly open on both sides of the street and heads, turned wonderingly
after the fleeting horseman, were framed in rectangles of light.
"What _is_ the matter out there?" The angle of the heads said it so
plainly that the doctor laughed within himself as he thundered on. Now
it chanced that one of the heads belonged to a Meddlesome Matty who,
next day, stirred the matter up, and that evening two officers of the
law presented themselves at Dr. Blank's office and arrested him.
"I don't care anything about the fine. All I wanted was to get there,"
he said, handing out the three dollars.
After the horse left the board walk the road became more solid and in
about ten minutes the doctor arrived at his destination. Before he could
knock the door was opened. The patient sat reclining in a chair,
motionless, rigid, her eyes closed.
"What has she taken?" asked the doctor of the woman's husband.
"Laudanum."
"How much?"
"She told me she took this bottle full," and he held up a two ounce
bottle.
"I think she's lying," thought the doctor as he laid his fingers upon
her pulse. Then he raised the lids and looked carefully at the pupils of
the eyes. "Not much contraction here," he thought. Turning to the
husband who stood pale and trembling beside him, he said,
"Don't be alarmed--she's in no more danger than you are." He watched the
patient's face as he spoke and saw what he expected--a faint facial
movement.
"To be on the safe side we'll treat the case as if she had taken two
ounces." He gave her a hypodermic emetic then called for warm water.
"How much?" asked the husband.
"O, a half gallon will do."
A big fat woman came panting through the doorway. "I got here as quick
as I could," she gasped.
"We don't need you at all," said the doctor quietly. "Better go back
home to your children, Mrs. Johnson."
Mrs. Johnson, not liking to be cheated out of a sensation which she
dearly loved, stood still. Mr. Lansing came back with the warm water. A
faint slit appeared under the eyelids of the patient. The doctor took
the big cup and said abruptly, "Here! drink this!"
No response. "Mrs. Lansing!" he said so sharply that her eyes opened.
"Drink this water."
"I ca-an't," she murmured feebly.
"Yes, you can."
"I won't," the voice was getting stronger.
"You will."
"You'll see."
"Yes, I'll see."
He held the big vessel to her mouth. When the water began to pour down
her neck she sprang to her feet fighting it off. He held the cup in his
left hand while with his right he reached around her neck and took her
firmly by the nose. Then he held the cup against her mouth and when it
opened for breath he poured the life-saving fluid forcefully down. Great
gulps of it were swallowed while a wide sheet of water poured down her
neck and over her night-dress to the floor.
"That was very well done. Better sit down now."
The husband stood in awed silence. The fat woman shook her fist at the
doctor's back which he beheld, nothing daunted, in the looking-glass on
the wall. The patient herself sat down in absolute quiet. In a minute
she began retching and vomited some of the water. The doctor inspected
it carefully. Then he went to his overcoat on a chair, felt in the
pocket and drew out a coil of something. It looked like red rubber and
was about half an inch in diameter. He slowly unwound it. It was five or
six feet in length. A subdued voice asked,
"What are you going to do now, Doctor?"
"I am going to turn on the hose."
"Wha-a-t?"
"I am going to put this tube down into your stomach. You haven't thrown
up much of that laudanum yet."
She opened her mouth to speak and the doctor inserted one end of the
tube and began ramming it down. "Unfasten a button or two here," he said
to her husband and rammed some more. She gagged and gurgled and tried to
push his hands away.
"Hold on, we're not down yet--we're only about to the third button." He
began ramming the tube again when she looked up at her husband so
imploringly that he said, "Hold on a minute, Doctor, she wants to say
something." The doctor withdrew the tube and waited.
"I'm sure I threw it all up."
"Oh no," he said beginning to lift it again.
"I--only--took--two--or three drops."
"Why the devil didn't you say so at the start?"
"I wish I had. I just told _Jim_ that."
"To get even with him for something," announced the doctor quietly.
"How can he know so much," mused Jim's wife.
"Now I advise you not to try this game again," said the doctor as he
wound up the stomach tube and put it into his pocket. "You can't fool
Jim all the time, and you can't fool me any of the time. Good night."
And he rode home and found Mary asleep in her chair.
* * * * *
Ting-a-ling-ling-ling. Ting-a-ling-ling-ling.
"Is this you, Dr. Blank?"
"Yes."
"I wanted to ask you about an electric vibrator."
"About what?"
"An electric vibrator."
"An electric something--I didn't get the last word."
A little laugh, then "v-i-b-r-a-t-o-r."
"Oh! vibrator."
"Yes. Do you think it would help my aunt?"
"Not a durned bit."
Another little laugh, "You don't think it would?"
"No!"
"I had a letter today from my cousin and she said she knew a lady who
had had a stroke and this vibrator helped her more than anything."
"It didn't. She imagined it."
"Well, I didn't know anything about it and I knew you would, so I
thought I'd 'phone you before going any further. Much obliged, Doctor."
It would save much time and money and disappointment if all those who
don't know would pause to put a question or two to those who do. But so
it is _not_, and the maker of worthless devices and the concocter of
nostrums galore cometh oft to fortune by leaps and bounds, while the
poor, conscientious physician who sticks to the truth of things,
arriveth betimes at starvation's gate.
(I was startled a few days ago to learn that the average income of
physicians in the United States does not exceed six hundred dollars.)
* * * * *
Ting-a-ling-ling-ling. Ting-a-ling-ling-ling.
"Tell papa he's wanted at the 'phone," said Mary.
"Where is he?"
"Isn't he there in the dining room?"
"No, he isn't here."
"He must be in the kitchen then; go to the door and call him."
The small boy obeyed. "He's not out here either," he announced from the
door-way.
"Why, where can he be!" cried Mary, springing up and going swiftly to
the 'phone. "Hello."
"Is the doctor there?"
"Yes. Wait just a minute and I will call him."
She hurried through the dining room, then through the kitchen and out
into the yard. No doctor to be seen. "He passed through the house not
three minutes ago," she said to herself.
"John!"
"Doctor!"
"Doc-_tor_!"
"O, dear! I don't see how he could disappear from the face of the earth
in three minutes' time!"
She hurried around a projecting corner through a little gate and called
again.
"What is it?" asked a placid voice as its owner emerged from his new
auto garage.
"Hurry to the 'phone for pity's sake!" and he hurried. Mary, following,
all out of breath, heard this:
"Two teaspoonfuls." Then the doctor hung up the receiver. He turned to
Mary and laughed as he quoted Emerson on the mountain and the mouse.
"I chased you all over the place this afternoon, John, when the 'phone
was calling you, and couldn't find you at all. Some people have days to
'appear' but this seems to be your day to disappear. Where were you
then?"
"Out in the garage."
"Fascinating spot! I'll know where to look next time. Now come to
supper."