CHAPTER XXI

“Dear me!” said Dr Drummond. “Dear me! Well! And what does Advena

Murchison say to all this?”

He and Hugh Finlay were sitting in the Doctor’s study, the pleasantest

room in the house. It was lined with standard religious philosophy,

standard poets, standard fiction, all that was standard, and nothing

that was not; and the shelves included several volumes of the Doctor’s

own sermons, published in black morocco through a local firm that did

business by the subscription method, with “Drummond” in gold letters

on the back. There were more copies of these, perhaps, than it would be

quite thoughtful to count, though a good many were annually disposed of

at the church bazaar, where the Doctor presented them with a generous

hand. A sumptuous desk, and luxurious leather-covered armchairs

furnished the room; a beautiful little Parian copy of a famous Cupid and

Psyche decorated the mantelpiece, and betrayed the touch of pagan in

the Presbyterian. A bright fire burned in the grate, and there was not a

speck of dust anywhere.

Dr Drummond, lost in his chair, with one knee dropped on the other,

joined his fingers at the tips, and drew his forehead into a web of

wrinkles. Over it his militant grey crest curled up; under it his eyes

darted two shrewd points of interrogation.

“What does Miss Murchison say to it?” he repeated with craft and

courage, as Finlay’s eyes dropped and his face slowly flushed under

the question. It was in this room that Dr Drummond examined “intending

communicants” and cases likely to come before the Session; he never

shirked a leading question. “Miss Murchison,” said Finlay, after a

moment, “was good enough to say that she thought her father’s house

would be open to Miss--to my friends when they arrived; but I thought it

would be more suitable to ask your hospitality, sir.”

“Did she so?” asked Dr Drummond gravely. It was more a comment than an

inquiry. “Did she so?” Infinite kindness was in it.

The young man assented with an awkward gesture, half-bend, half-nod, and

neither for a moment spoke again. It was one of those silences with a

character, conscious, tentative. Half-veiled, disavowed thoughts rose up

in it, awakened by Advena’s name, turning away their heads. The ticking

of the Doctor’s old-fashioned watch came through it from his waistcoat

pocket. It was he who spoke first.

“I christened Advena Murchison,” he said. “Her father was one of those

who called me, as a young man, to this ministry. The names of both her

parents are on my first communion roll. Aye!”...

The fire snapped and the watch went on ticking.

“So Advena thought well of it all. Did she so?”

The young man raised his heavy eyes and looked unflinchingly at Dr

Drummond.

“Miss Murchison,” he said, “is the only other person to whom I have

confided the matter. I have written, fixing that date, with her

approval--at her desire. Not immediately. I took time to--think it over.

Then it seemed better to arrange for the ladies reception first, so

before posting I have come to you.”

“Then the letter has not gone?”

“It is in my pocket.”

“Finlay, you will have a cigar? I don’t smoke myself; my throat won’t

stand it; but I understand these are passable. Grant left them here.

He’s a chimney, that man Grant. At it day and night.”

This was a sacrifice. Dr Drummond hated tobacco, the smell of it, the

ash of it, the time consumed in it. There was no need at all to offer

Finlay one of the Reverend Grant’s cigars. Propitiation must indeed be

desired when the incense is abhorred. But Finlay declined to smoke.

The Doctor, with his hands buried deep in his trousers pockets, where

something metallic clinked in them, began to pace and turn. His mouth

had the set it wore when he handled a difficult motion in the General

Assembly.

“I’m surprised to hear that, Finlay; though it may be well not to be

surprised at what a woman will say--or won’t say.”

“Surprised?” said the younger man confusedly. “Why should anyone be

surprised?”

“I know her well. I’ve watched her grow up. I remember her mother’s

trouble because she would scratch the paint on the pew in front of her

with the nails in her little boots. John Murchison sang in the choir in

those days. He had a fine bass voice; he has it still. And Mrs Murchison

had to keep the family in order by herself. It was sometimes as much as

she could do, poor woman. They sat near the front, and many a good

hard look I used to give them while I was preaching. Knox Church was a

different place then. The choir sat in the back gallery, and we had a

precentor, a fine fellow--he lost an arm at Ridgway in the Fenian raid.

Well I mind him and the frown he would put on when he took up the fork.

But, for that matter, every man Jack in the choir had a frown on in the

singing, though the bass fellows would be the fiercest. We’ve been twice

enlarged since, and the organist has long been a salaried professional.

But I doubt whether the praise of God is any heartier than it was when

it followed Peter Craig’s tuning-fork. Aye. You’d always hear John

Murchison’s note in the finish.”

Finlay was listening with the look of a charmed animal. Dr Drummond’s

voice was never more vibrant, more moving, more compelling than when he

called up the past; and here to Finlay the past was itself enchanted.

“She always had those wonderful dark eyes. She’s pale enough now, but

as a child she was rosy. Taking her place of a winter evening, with the

snow on her fur cap and her hair, I often thought her a picture. I liked

to have her attention while I was preaching, even as a child; and when

she was absent I missed her. It was through my ministrations that she

saw her way to professing the Church of Christ, and under my heartfelt

benediction that she first broke bread in her Father’s house. I hold the

girl in great affection, Finlay; and I grieve to hear this.”

The other drew a long breath, and his hand tightened on the arm of his

chair. He was, as we know, blind to many of the world’s aspects, even to

those in which he himself figured; and Dr Drummond’s plain hypothesis of

his relations with Advena came before him in forced illumination, flash

by tragic flash. This kind of revelation is more discomforting than

darkness, since it carries the surprise of assault, and Finlay groped in

it, helpless and silent.

“You are grieved, sir?” he said mechanically.

“Man, she loves you!” exclaimed the Doctor, in a tone that would no

longer forbear.

Hugh Finlay seemed to take the words just where they were levelled, in

his breast. He half leaped from his chair; the lower part of his face

had the rigidity of iron.

“I am not obliged to discuss such a matter as that,” he said hoarsely,

“with you or with any man.”

He looked confusedly about him for his hat, which he had left in the

hall; and Dr Drummond profited by the instant. He stepped across and

laid a hand on the younger man’s shoulder. Had they both been standing

the gesture would have been impossible to Dr Drummond with dignity;

as it was, it had not only that, but benignance, a kind of tender good

will, rare in expression with the minister, rare, for that matter, in

feeling with him too, though the chord was always there to be sounded.

“Finlay,” he said; “Finlay!”

Between two such temperaments the touch and the tone together made an

extraordinary demonstration. Finlay, with an obvious effort, let it lie

upon him. The tension of his body relaxed, that of his soul he covered,

leaning forward and burying his head in his hands.

“Will you say I have no claim to speak?” asked Dr Drummond, and met

silence. “It is upon my lips to beg you not to send that letter,

Finlay.” He took his hand from the young man’s shoulder, inserted a

thumb in each of his waistcoat pockets, and resumed his walk.

“On my own account I must send it,” said Finlay. “On Miss

Murchison’s--she bids me to. We have gone into the matter together.”

“I can imagine what you made of it together. There’s a good deal of her

father in Advena. He would be the last man to say a word for himself.

You told her this tale you have told me, and she told you to get Miss

Christie out and marry her without delay, eh? And what would you expect

her to tell you--a girl of that spirit?”

“I cannot see why pride should influence her.”

“Then you know little about women. It was pride, pure and simple,

Finlay, that made her tell you that--and she’ll be a sorry woman if you

act on it.”

“No,” said Finlay, suddenly looking up, “I may know little about women,

but I know more about Advena Murchison than that. She advised me in the

sense she thought right and honourable, and her advice was sincere. And,

Dr Drummond, deeply as I feel the bearing of Miss Murchison’s view of

the matter, I could not, in any case, allow my decision to rest upon it.

It must stand by itself.”

“You mean that your decision to marry to oblige your aunt should not be

influenced by the fact that it means the wrecking of your own happiness

and that of another person. I can’t agree, Finlay. I spoke first of

Advena Murchison because her part and lot in it are most upon my heart.

I feel, too, that someone should put her case. Her own father would

never open his lips. If you’re to be hauled over the coals about this

I’m the only man to do it. And I’m going to.”

A look of sharp determination came into the minister’s eyes; he had the

momentary air of a small Scotch terrier with a bidding. Finlay looked at

him in startled recognition of another possible phase of his dilemma; he

thought he knew it in every wretched aspect. It was a bold reference

of Dr Drummond’s; it threw down the last possibility of withdrawal for

Finlay; they must have it out now, man to man, with a little, perhaps,

even in that unlikely place, of penitent to confessor. It was an

exigency, it helped Finlay to pull himself together, and there was

something in his voice, when he spoke, like the vibration of relief.

“I am pained and distressed more than I have any way of telling you,

sir,” he said, “that--the state of feeling--between Miss Murchison and

myself should have been so plain to you. It is incomprehensible to

me that it should be so, since it is only very lately that I have

understood it truly myself. I hope you will believe that it was the

strangest, most unexpected, most sudden revelation.”

He paused and looked timidly at the Doctor; he, the great fellow, in

straining bondage to his heart, leaning forward with embarrassed tension

in every muscle, Dr Drummond alert, poised, critical, balancing his

little figure on the hearthrug.

“I preach faith in miracles,” he said. “I dare say between you and her

it would be just that.”

“I have been deeply culpable. Common sense, common knowledge of men and

women should have warned me that there might be danger. But I looked

upon the matter as our own--as between us only. I confess that I have

not till now thought of that part of it, but surely--You cannot mean

to tell me that what I have always supposed my sincere and devoted

friendship for Miss Murchison has been in any way prejudicial--”

“To her in the ordinary sense? To her prospects of marriage and her

standing in the eyes of the community? No, Finlay. No. I have not heard

the matter much referred to. You seem to have taken none of the ordinary

means--you have not distinguished her in the eyes of gossip. If you had

it would be by no means the gravest thing to consider. Such tokens are

quickly forgotten, especially here, where attentions of the kind often,

I’ve noticed, lead to nothing. It is the fact, and not the appearance of

it, that I speak of--that I am concerned with.”

“The fact is beyond mending,” said Finlay, dully.

“Aye, the fact is beyond mending. It is beyond mending that Advena

Murchison belongs to you and you to her in no common sense. It’s beyond

mending that you cannot now be separated without such injury to you both

as I would not like to look upon. It’s beyond mending, Finlay, because

it is one of those things that God has made. But it is not beyond

marring, and I charge you to look well what you are about in connection

with it.”

A flash of happiness, of simple delight, lit the young man’s sombre eyes

as the phrases fell. To the minister they were mere forcible words;

to Finlay they were soft rain in a famished land. Then he looked again

heavily at the pattern of the carpet.

“Would you have me marry Advena Murchison?” he said, with a kind of

shamed yielding to the words.

“I would--and no other. Man, I saw it from the beginning!” exclaimed the

Doctor. “I don’t say it isn’t an awkward business. But at least there’ll

be no heartbreak in Scotland. I gather you never said a word to the

Bross lady on the subject, and very few on any other. You tell me you

left it all with that good woman, your aunt, to arrange after you left.

Do you think a creature of any sentiment would have accepted you on

those terms? Not she. So far as I can make out, Miss Cameron is just a

sensible, wise woman that would be the first to see the folly in this

business if she knew the rights of it. Come, Finlay, you’re not such a

great man with the ladies--you can’t pretend she has any affection for

you.”

The note of raillery in the Doctor’s voice drew Finlay’s brows together.

“I don’t know,” he said, “whether I have to think of her affections, but

I do know I have to think of her dignity, her confidence, and her belief

in the honourable dealing of a man whom she met under the sanction of a

trusted roof. The matter may look light here; it is serious there. She

has her circle of friends; they are acquainted with her engagement. She

has made all her arrangements to carry it out; she has disposed of her

life. I cannot ask her to reconsider her lot because I have found a

happier adjustment for mine.”

“Finlay,” said Dr Drummond, “you will not be known in Bross or anywhere

else as a man who has jilted a woman. Is that it?”

“I will not be a man who has jilted a woman.”

“There is no sophist like pride. Look at the case on its merits. On the

one side a disappointment for Miss Cameron. I don’t doubt she’s counting

on coming, but at worst a worldly disappointment. And the very grievous

humiliation for you of writing to tell her that you have made a mistake.

You deserve that, Finlay. If you wouldn’t be a man who has jilted a

woman you have no business to lend yourself to such matters with the

capacity of a blind kitten. That is the damage on the one side. On the

other--”

“I know all that there is to be said,” interrupted Finlay, “on the

other.”

“Then face it, man. Go home and write the whole truth to Bross. I’ll do

it for you--no, I won’t, either. Stand up to it yourself. You must hurt

one of two women; choose the one that will suffer only in her vanity. I

tell you that Scotch entanglement of yours is pure cardboard farce--it

won’t stand examination. It’s appalling to think that out of an

extravagant, hypersensitive conception of honour, egged on by that poor

girl, you could be capable of turning it into the reality of your life.”

“I’ve taken all these points of view, sir, and I can’t throw the woman

over. The objection to it isn’t in reason--it’s somehow in the past and

the blood. It would mean the sacrifice of all that I hold most valuable

in myself. I should expect myself after that to stick at nothing--why

should I?”

“There is one point of view that perhaps you have not taken,” said Dr

Drummond, in his gravest manner. “You are settled here in your charge.

In all human probability you will remain here in East Elgin, as I have

remained here, building and fortifying the place you have won for the

Lord in the hearts of the people. Advena Murchison’s life will also go

on here--there is nothing to take it away. You have both strong natures.

Are you prepared for that?”

“We are both prepared for it. We shall both be equal to it. I count upon

her, and she counts upon me, to furnish in our friendship the greater

part of whatever happiness life may have in store for us.”

“Then you must be a pair of born lunatics!” said Dr Drummond, his jaw

grim, his eyes snapping. “What you propose is little less than a crime,

Finlay. It can come to nothing but grief, if no worse. And your wife,

poor woman, whatever she deserves, it is better than that! My word, if

she could choose her prospect, think you she would hesitate? Finlay, I

entreat you as a matter of ordinary prudence, go home and break it

off. Leave Advena out of it--you have no business to make this marriage

whether or no. Leave other considerations to God and to the future. I

beseech you, bring it to an end!”

Finlay got up and held out his hand. “I tell you from my heart it is

impossible,” he said.

“I can’t move you?” said Dr Drummond. “Then let us see if the Lord can.

You will not object, Finlay, to bring the matter before Him, here and

now, in a few words of prayer? I should find it hard to let you go

without them.”

They went down upon their knees where they stood; and Dr Drummond did

little less than order Divine interference; but the prayer that was

inaudible was to the opposite purpose.

Ten minutes later the minister himself opened the door to let Finlay out

into the night. “You will remember,” he said as they shook hands,

“that what I think of your position in this matter makes no difference

whatever to the question of your aunt’s coming here with Miss Cameron

when they arrive. You will bring them to this house as a matter of

course. I wish you could be guided to a different conclusion but, after

all, it is your own conscience that must be satisfied. They will be

better here than at the Murchisons’,” he added with a last shaft of

reproach, “and they will be very welcome.”

It said much for Dr Drummond that Finlay was able to fall in with the

arrangement. He went back to his boarding-house, and added a postscript

embodying it to his letter to Bross. Then he walked out upon the

midnight two feverish miles to the town, and posted the letter. The way

back was longer and colder.

The Imperialist · 第 21 / 33 章