The charge is prepar'd, the lawyers are met,
The judges all rang'd, a terrible show!
I go undismay'd, for death is a debt,
A debt on demand,--so take what I owe.
Since laws were made for every degree,
To curb vice in others as well as in me;
I wonder we ha'n't better company
Upon Tyburn tree!
But gold from law can take out the sting,
And if rich men like us were to swing
'Twould thin the land such numbers would string
Upon Tyburn tree!
PURPOSING to spend an hour in the Sessions House at the Old Bailey,
our adventurers started next morning betimes, and reaching their
destination, took their seats in the gallery, for which accommodation
they were charged one shilling each, which the Squire denominated an
imposition, inquiring of his friend by what authority it was exacted,
and to whose benefit applied, as from the frequent sittings of the
Court, and general crouded state of the gallery, the perquisites must be
considerable.
“Custom in every thing bears sovereign sway,” answered Dashall. “I know
not whence this is derived, nor whose pockets are lined by the produce;
but you will probably be surprised to learn, that a shilling admission
is only demanded on common occasions, and that on trials of great public
interest, from one to two guineas has been paid by every individual
obtaining admission.”
The arrival of the Judges now terminated this colloquy. The Lord Mayor
and several Aldermen were in waiting to receive them, and these sage
expounders of the law were conducted to the Bench by the Sheriffs of
London and Middlesex. The Chief Magistrate of the City uniformly and of
right presiding at this Court, his Lordship ~178~~ took his seat on
the same Bench with the Judges, and the usual forms having been gone
through, the dispensation of justice commenced.
Several prisoners were tried and convicted of capital felony, during the
short space of time that our associated observers remained in Court;
but the cases of these wretched men, and the consciousness of their
impending fate, seemed in no respect to operate upon their minds, as
they left the bar apparently with perfect indifference.
An unfortunate man was next brought forward, and accused of having
stolen from an auction room a couple of wine glasses. He was of
respectable demeanor, and evidently had seen better days. When asked
what he had to allege in his defence, the victim of misery preluding
his story with a torrent of tears, told the following piteous tale of
distress:
He had been in business, and sustained an unimpeachable integrity of
character for many years. Independence seemed within his reach, when
misfortune, equally unforeseen as inevitable, at all points assailed
him! In the course of one disastrous year, death deprived him of his
family, and adversity of his property. He had unsuccessfully speculated,
and the insolvency of several who were considerably indebted to him, had
completed his ruin! At the time he committed the act for which he stood
convicted at that bar, he had not tasted food for three days, neither
had he in the world a friend or relative to whom he could apply for
relief. The Jury found him Guilty, but strongly recommended him to
mercy. The Judge humanely observed, that the least possible punishment
should be inflicted on the prisoner. He was then sentenced to a fine
of one shilling, and to be discharged. A sum of money, the spontaneous
bounty of the spectators, was immediately collected for him, while one
of the Jury promised him employment, on his calling at his house on
the following day. The gratitude of the poor man was inexpressible:
the sudden transition from the abyss of despair to the zenith of hope,
seemed to overwhelm his faculties. He ejaculated a blessing on his
benefactors, and departed.
~179~~ Dashall and his friend were much affected by this incident.
Another, however, presently occurred, of a more lively description.
In the course of the next trial, the counsellor, on cross-examining
a witness, found occasion to address him with, “Well, my old buck,
I suppose you are one of those people who do not often go to
church?”--“Perhaps,” said the other, “if the truth were known, I am as
often there as you are.” The promptness of the reply produced a laugh,
in which the witness very cordially joined. “What makes you laugh?” said
the lawyer. “Is not every body laughing?” replied the other. “True,”
said the man of law; “but do you know what they are laughing at?”--“Why,
I think in my heart,” rejoined the fellow, “that they take either me or
you to be a fool, but I do not know which!”
The Judge at this repartee could not retain his gravity; a tumult of
mirth pervaded the whole Court, and the discomfited counsellor adjusted
his wig and sat down.
During the few minutes longer that our heroes remained, nothing of
interest occurring, they withdrew; and passing down the Old Bailey to
Ludgate Street, and from thence towards the Temple, they crossed Fleet
Street, and taking the direction of Shire Lane, were induced, by way of
investigating Real Life in its lowest classification, to enter one of
those too frequent receptacles of vice denominated Coffee Shops.
This was a house of notorious irregularity, the occupant of which had
more than once experienced the visitation of the law for his utter
contempt of social order--and from the present appearance of his guests,
it did not seem that legal interference had effected moral amendment.
As our two friends entered this Augean Stable, a whisper of surprise,
mingled with dismay, went round the motley assemblage of female
street-drabs, cracksmen,{1} and fogle-hunters; and a wary glance of
suspicion darted from the group “many a time and oft” on the new-comers,
who notwithstanding kept possession of their seats, and ordering without
apparent notice of the party a cup of coffee, apprehension subsided into
security, the re-assured inmates resumed their interrupted hilarity, and
our adventurers were thus afforded the means of leisurable observation.
1 Cracksmen (Burglars), Fogle-hunters (Pickpockets).
~180~~ The Squire, who had not perused the annals of blackguardism, and
consequently was not an adept in the knowledge of the slang or vulgar
tongue, was under the frequent necessity of applying to his friend for
explanation of the obscure phraseology of those ladies and gentlemen of
the pad, which Dashall contrived to occasionally interpret without the
assistance or notice of its multitudinous learned professors.
The desire of witnessing the exhibition of Real Life in its lowest
state of human degradation, induced a prolongation of stay by our two
associates. In the meanwhile, “the mirth and fun grew fast and furious,”
exemplified by dance, song, and revelry, interspersed with practical
jokes, recriminative abuse, and consequent pugilistic exercise, where
science and strength alternately prevailed; and in deficiency of other
missiles, poker, tongs, coffee-cups, saucers, and plates, were brought
into active requisition.--The scene was a striking illustration of
“Confusion worse confounded.” Luckily our two observers were in a
situation without the reach of injury; they therefore “smiled at the
tumult and enjoyed the storm.”
The landlord now interfered in defence of his fragile property.
Preliminaries of peace were agreed on, through his high mediation, and
finally ratified betwixt the contending parties, ending as they began,
like many other conflicting powers, _statu quo ante bellum_!
“And now to serious business we'll advance, says one of the King's of
Brentford.
“But first let's have a dance.”
The present party followed exactly Mr. Baye's proposition; the dance and
the row over, they now proceeded to serious business.
Seated in various groups, each engaged itself in conversation, which,
from its almost inaudible expression, was singularly contrasted with the
recent tumultuous uproar.
The next box where sat our two friends, was occupied by cracksmen and
fogle-hunters, one of whom, whose superior skill gave him an ascendancy
over his associates, had delineated on the table the plan of certain
premises, and having given in a very low tone of voice, a verbal
illustration to his fellow-labourers, with what intention it is not
difficult to conjecture, observed, “We may as well _pad_ (walk) it, as
_Sir Oliver_ (the moon) is not out to night.”
~181~~ The party to whom this remark was addressed, prepared to pad it
accordingly,--when the desired egress was opposed by the entrance of
three men, who unbuttoning their great coats, exhibited, each a hanger
and brace of pistols, and took the whole community, male and female,
into safe custody
This was a _coup-de-main_ on the part of the captors, and sustained with
the most perfect _sang froid_ by the captured.
The officers next turned their attention to Dashall and Tallyho, who
giving their cards, and candidly explaining the motives which led them
into the temporary society of the prisoners, they were treated with
becoming respect, the officers with their captives proceeding on
their route to Bow Street, and our heros to the occurrence of future
adventure.
Tallyho congratulated himself on his escape from expected mortification
and inconvenience, but Dashall, whose more active and enterprizing mind
was not to be checked by trifles, enjoyed the vague apprehensions of his
friend, and by way of making amends for the penance they had inflicted
on themselves in Shire Lane, agreed to dine and finish the evening at a
Tavern in Covent Garden.
Thither, then, as they pursued their course, the Squire expressed his
surprise that a final stop was not put to scenes such as they had just
witnessed, and all such places of nefarious rendezvous, abolished by the
vigilance of the police.
“On the contrary,” observed Dashall, “it is the interest of the
police, not utterly to destroy these receptacles of vice. They are
the toleration haunts of profligacy, where the officers of justice
are generally assured of meeting the objects of their inquiry, and
therefore, under proper restrictions, and an occasional clearance,
the continuance of a minor evil is productive of public benefit, by
arresting the progress of infamy, and preventing the extension of
crime.”
Passing along the Strand, the humane feelings of the Squire were excited
by apparently a mutilated veteran seaman, who in a piteous tone of
voice, supplicated his charitable consideration. The applicant stated,
that he had lost an arm and an eye, and was deprived the use of a leg,
in the service of his country, without friend or home, and entirely
destitute of the means of subsistence, that he had no other resource
than that of a humble reliance on public benevolence. The Squire with
his usual philanthropic promptitude drew out his purse, but his ~182~~
friend intercepted the boon, and inquired of the seaman under whom, in
what ship, and in what action he had sustained his misfortunes. To these
questions a satisfactory answer was given, and the claim of the man to
compassion and relief was about to be admitted, when another inquiry
occurred, “are you a pensioner?”
A pause ensued: in the interim the mendicant seeing a person approach,
of whose recognition he was not at all ambitious, dropped in a moment
his timber toe, unslung his arm, dashed a patch from his eye, and set
off with the speed of a race-horse.
During the amazement of our two observers of Real Life, excited by this
sudden and unexpected transformation, the officer, for such was the
quondam acquaintance of the imposter, introduced himself to their
notice. “Gentlemen,” said he, “you are not up to the tricks of London,
that fellow on whom you were about to bestow your charity, and who has
just now exhibited his agility, is one of the greatest imposters in
London;--however, I shall not run him down at present.--I know his
haunts, and reckon sure of my game in the evening.”
“I confess,” replied Dashall, “that in the present instance I have
been egregiously deceived;--I certainly am not up to all the tricks of
London, although neither a Johnny Raw nor a green-horn; and yet I would
not wish to prove callous to the claim of distress, even if sometimes
unguardedly bestowing the mite of benevolence on an undeserving object.”
“The Society for the Suppression of Mendicity in the Metropolis,” said
the Officer, “think differently, they recommend that no relief should be
given to street-beggars.”
“Then,” said Dashall, offended by the officer's interference,--“I envy
them not the possession of their feelings,” and the two friends renewed
their walk.
Proceeding, without further interruption, our pedestrians, were induced
to intermingle with a crowd which had collected round a man who wore
a most patriarchal redundancy of beard, and had been recognized by an
acquaintance as a shoe-maker of the name of Cooke, a disciple of the
American Prophet, John Decker.
~183~~ Their high mightinesses the mobility were mischievously inclined,
and would certainly have grossly insulted, if not injured the
poor devotee, had not Dashall and his friend taken him under their
protection.{1} He had been quietly making his way through Covent Garden
Market, when the greetings and surprise of his friend at his strange
transformation, attracted the curiosity of the multitude, and his
unhesitating declaration, that he meant to accompany the great Prophet
to Jerusalem, excited derision and indignation against the unfortunate
enthusiast, when luckily our two heros interposed their good offices and
conducted the proselyte in safety to the Shakespeare Tavern.
1 On Monday, in consequence of a very great uproar on Sunday
night, in Worcester Street, Southwark, about the house of
the American Prophet, John Decker, that singular person was
brought before the Magistrates of this office, the
inhabitants of the neighbourhood having attributed the
disturbance to the unfortunate fanaticism of the prophet and
his followers.
The constables stated, that on Sunday night, at half-past
eight o'clock, they saw a mob, consisting of about three
hundred people, collected at the door of the house, and
heard the cries of “murder” issue from within. The officers
on going up stairs, found the Prophet lying on his back.
Some persons who had been abusing him escaped, and the
Prophet said the cause of their violence was, that he had
refused to get out of his bed to preach. He was conveyed to
the watch-house. The witnesses informed the Magistrate, that
the Prophet had made some proselytes, who were actually
about to leave the country with him, and accompany him upon
an expedition to the Holy Land. The parish officers were
naturally alarmed at the inconveniences to which such an
emigration would expose them, and hoped that every thing the
arm of the law could do would be done to prevent it. The
fanatic spirit of some of the followers of the Prophet may
be guessed at from the following facts:--
The officers who apprehended him, had, two or three times,
in the course of Sunday evening, gone to the house in
Worcester Street, and dispersed a large congregation that
had assembled in the room appropriated to preaching. The
Prophet preached first, and was succeeded by one of his most
zealous followers, who was followed by another. This was
constantly the practice, and during the service, which was
being listened to with rapture, upwards of a dozen of the
congregation seemed to be as violently engaged as the
Prophet himself, whose sincerity is well known. One man, a
shoe-maker, named Cooke, has actually sold off his stock and
furniture, which were worth £300.; and if he were not known
to be the greatest admirer of the Prophet might be called
his rival, for he has allowed his beard to grow to an
immense length, and goes about preaching and making
converts. He has a little son, who looks half-starved, and
is denied all animal food by the Prophet and his father,
upon the principle of Pythagoras--that he might not be
guilty of eating a piece of his own grand-mother. Another
trades-man, who was most industrious, and attached to his
wife and seven children, proposes to leave them all, and go
to Jerusalem. His beard is also becoming indicative of his
intention, and he sleeps, as the others who are struck by
the Prophet do--with his clothes on. None of the sixteen
families who reside in the house in which the Prophet lives,
have, however, caught the infection, and the land-lady
complained most severely of the annoyance to which she was
subject.
Mr. Chambers said he expected to have heard that the Prophet
was on his way to Jerusalem.
The Prophet said he only waited for a Tunisian vessel to set
sail with his brother Cooke, and nine other of his brethren.
Upon being questioned as to his inducing those men to leave
their families, he said he did not take them, a higher power
took them. After having stated the manner in which he had
been pulled out of the bed, and declared that he forgave his
enemies, he said, in answer to a question whether he was at
Brixton, and worked there, “Yea,” and to the question
whether he liked it, “Nay.”
Cooke, the shoe-maker, then stepped forward, and told the
Magistrate that he was determined to follow his brother
Decker to Jerusalem, but that the parish should suffer no
inconvenience, for he should take his son with him on his
pilgrimage. He said that they should not preach again where
they had been so abused, but should remove to a house near
the National School, in St. George's Fields, where they
would preach till the day of their departure.
The Magistrate assured the Prophet that he should be
committed if he preached again without a license, which he
might have next Sessions for four-pence. The Prophet was
then discharged.
Decker, it appeared, had baptized seventeen persons, since
he commenced his labours in St. George's Fields.
~184~~ No remonstrances of Dashall were of any avail in inducing the
pertinacious fanatic to forego his resolution of a pilgrimage to the
Holy Land, and when the inquisitive numbers who still lingered in front
of the tavern had dispersed, Cooke, with appropriate acknowledgment of
the protection which had been afforded him, took his leave, after having
unsuccessfully endeavoured to make converts of Dashall and the Squire
to the tenets of Prophet Decker, or to prevail on them to accompany the
sacred band in the projected expedition to Jerusalem.