["Mr. DE LISLE wished the Government to veto any pictures
purchased under the Chantrey Bequest that did not meet with
their approval."--_Daily Paper._]
SCENE--_A Studio in the Royal Academy. The_ President _and several_
Members of the Council _waiting arrival of Government to inspect their
most recent purchase._
_President_ (_with assumed joviality_). Well, my dear Colleagues, I
do not think exception _can_ be taken to this composition. Simple and
effective, is it not?
_First Member of Council_ (_gloomily_). Oh, you never know! I think we
ought to have opposed the admission of the Cabinet--what should _they_
know about Art?
_Second Mem_. (_drily_). Enough to make speeches at the annual
dinner--to which they wouldn't come if we snubbed them.
_First Mem_. What of that? I am sure the President is quite eloquent
enough to stand alone.
_Pres_. (_with a graceful bow_). You are most kind. But, hush! here
comes Lord SALISBURY!
_Enter the_ PRIME MINISTER. _Cordial greetings._
_Premier_ (_briskly_). I am sure you will forgive me if I get through
this quickly. (_Looking at picture._) Hm! Yes, very nice; but _did_
EDWARD the Black Prince wear his Garter ribbon in battle? I am sure
I refrain from appearing in mine under similar circumstances. (_To_
Pres.) Do you think the Artist could paint it out?
_Pres_. I feel sure he will do everything in his power to satisfy your
Lordship's artistic instincts.
_Premier_. Just so.
[_Exit_ R. _when enter_ FIRST LORD of the TREASURY, L.
_Pres_. (_greeting new-comer cordially_). Most glad to see you, my
dear Right Hon. Sir!
_First Lord_. Very good indeed of you to say so, but am always anxious
to do my duty to my Queen and Country. (_Gazing at picture._) Hm! Not
bad! But, I say, I do know something of yachting, and that isn't the
way to brace up the marling-spike to the fokesell yard with the main
jibboom three points in a wind with some East in it! If I may venture
a suggestion--hope Artist will paint out the gondola. Ta-ta! A bird in
the hand is worth two in the bush. [_Exit._
_Pres_. Well, well, I do not know what our friend will think of the
matter, but perhaps the Hansom of Venice _is_ a little superfluous.
Why here is the HOME SECRETARY.
[_Enter that august personage--mutual greeting._
_Home Sec_. (_examining picture_). Yes, very nice. Just my idea of
what a historical picture _should_ be! Sea-view very fair indeed,
and I think that the suggestion of the presentation at Court is
also extremely neat. The Black Prince, perhaps, a little near OLIVER
CROMWELL, but then that is a detail that will not challenge particular
attention. I like too the view of Vauxhall Gardens--very good, indeed!
But why should a scene of this great historical importance be laid in
Charing Cross during a labour demonstration?
_Pres_. (_frankly_). I cannot say that I have looked up all my
authorities, but I do not think our friend would allow himself to be
wrong on so important a point.
_Home Sec_. Well, I think it would be in better taste if the Artist
cut out that stampede of police--it is not true to nature! [_Exit._
_Pres_. There _may_ be something in what he says, but I do wish these
amateurs would keep their suggestions to themselves.
_Enter_ FIRST LORD of the ADMIRALTY.
_Pres_. (_cordially_). My dear Lord, delighted to see you--what do you
think of it?
_First Lord_. Hm! Yes! Perhaps! But, I say, what right has the Artist
to put the white ensign on the top of that light-house? It's against
the regulations--they should be flying the Trinity House flag--if
anything. That _must_ come out, you know--it really must! [_Exit._
_Pres_. Silly blunder, but it can be easily remedied. Ah! the
Secretary of State for War! (_Enter that official_) Well, Mr.
STANHOPE, and how do _you_ like the new purchase?
_War Minister_ (_after, a glance at the canvas_). Tol lol. But come, I
say, come; the Iron Duke never wore a hat like _that_! And, I say,
as it isn't raining, why has he put up his umbrella? In the cause of
historical accuracy that should not be allowed. [_Exit._
_Pres_. (_drily_). I am afraid our friend will have enough to do.
(_Enter the remainder of the Cabinet together_). Well, Gentlemen--hope
you approve of our purchase?
_Remainder_ (_together_). Not at all. You should have only bought the
frame! [_Scene closes in on the consideration of this new point._
* * * * *
[Illustration: "MANNING THE (BACK-)YARDS."