The origin of the word "quack" is not ascertained. Johnson derives it from
the verb "_to quack_, or gabble like a goose." Butler uses this verb as
descriptive of the encomiums empirics heap upon their nostrums. Thus in
Hudibras:
Believe mechanic Virtuosi
Can raise them mountains in Potosi,
Seek out for plants with signatures
To _quack_ of universal cures.
The word _charlatan_ is equally enveloped in obscurity. Furetiere and
Calepin say that it is derived from the Italian word _Ceretano_, from
_Caeretum_, a town near Spoleto, whence a band of impostors first sallied
forth, marching under the banners of Hippocrates, and roving from town to
town, selling drugs and giving medical advice.[24] Menage has it that
_charlatan_ springs from _Circulatanus_, from _Circulator_. Other
etymologists trace it to the Italian _Ciarlare_, to chatter; hence
_Ciarlatan_.
The Romans called their quacks _Agyrtae_, or _Seplasiarii_, from
_Seplasium_, the generic name of aromatic substances. _Seplasium_ was the
place where they vended their drugs. Thus Martial:
Quodque ab Adumaeis vectum _seplasia_ vendunt,
Et quidquid confert medicis lagaea cataplus.
An empiric was also called _Planus_ and _Circulator_ "_unde Plani unde
levatores_."
Some of the stratagems resorted to by needy empirics to get into practice
are very ingenious, and many a regular physician has been obliged to have
recourse to similar artifices to procure employment. It is related of a
Parisian physician, that, on his first arrival in the capital, he was in
the habit of sending his servant in a carriage about daybreak to rap at
the doors of the principal mansions to inquire for his master, as he was
sent for to repair instantly to such and such a prince, who was dying. The
drowsy porter naturally replied, with much ill-humour, "that he knew
nothing of his master."--"What! did he not pass the night in this house?"
replied the footman, apparently astonished. "No," gruffly answered the
Swiss; "there's nobody ill here."--"Then I must have mistaken the house.
Is not this the hotel of the Duke of ----?"--"No. Go to the devil!"
exclaimed the porter, closing the ponderous gates. From this house his
valet then proceeded from street to street, alarming the whole
neighbourhood with his loud rap. Of course nothing else was spoken of in
the porter's lodge, the grocer's shop, and the servants' hall for nine
days.
Another quack, upon his arrival in a town, announced himself by sending
the bellman round, offering fifty guineas reward for a poodle belonging to
Doctor ----, Physician to his Majesty and the Royal Family, Professor of
Medicine, and Surgeon General, who had put up at such and such an inn. Of
course the physician of a king, who could give fifty guineas for a lost
dog, must be a man of pre-eminence in his profession.
Another indigent physician having complained of his ill-fortune to an
ingenious friend, received the following advice: The _Cafe de la Regence_
is now in fashion: I play at chess every day at two o'clock, when a
considerable crowd is assembled. Come there at the same hour; do not
pretend to know me; call for a cup of coffee, and always pay the waiter
his money in a rose-coloured paper: leave the rest to me. The doctor
followed his advice; and his eccentric manners were soon observed,--when
his friend informed the persons around him, that he was one of the ablest
practitioners in the land; that he had known him for upwards of fifteen
years, and that his cures were most marvellous,--his extreme modesty alone
having prevented him from giving publicity to his abilities. He further
added, I have long wished to become intimate with so great a man; but he
is so absorbed in the study of his profession, that he scarcely ever
enters into conversation with any one. In a short time, the Rose-colour
Doctor was in extensive business.
Many years ago, the jaw-breaking words _Tetrachymagogon_ and _Fellino
Guffino Cardimo Cardimac Frames_, were chalked all over London, as two
miracle-working doctors. Men with such names must have some superior
qualification, and numbers flocked to consult them. Another quack put up
as an advertisement, that he had just arrived in town, after having made
the wonderful discovery of the green and red dragon and the female
fern-seed. This was sure to attract notice. An advertisement was handed
about of a learned physician, "who had studied thirty years by
candle-light for the good of his countrymen." He was, moreover, the
seventh son of a seventh son, and was possessed of a wonderful cure for
hernia, as both his father and his grandfather had been ruptured. This
reminds one of the oculist in Mouse Alley, mentioned in the Spectator, who
undertook to cure cataracts, in consequence of his having lost an eye in
the Imperial service. Dr. Case made a fortune by having the lines, _Within
this place, lives Doctor Case_, written in large characters upon his door.
The accidental circumstances which frequently bring medical men into
extensive practice, or that notoriety which may lead to it, are truly
curious. It is well known that a most eminent English physician owed all
his success to his having been on a particular occasion in a state of
intoxication. Disappointed on his first arrival in London, he sought
comfort in a neighbouring tavern, where the servant of the house at which
he lodged went to fetch him one evening, after a heavy potation, to see a
certain countess. The high-sounding title of this unexpected patient
tended not a little to increase the excitement under which he laboured. He
followed a livery footman as steadily as he could, and was ushered in
silence into a noble mansion, where her ladyship's woman anxiously waited
to conduct him most discreetly to her mistress's room; her agitation most
probably preventing her from perceiving the doctor's state. He was
introduced into a splendid bedchamber, and staggered towards the bed in
which the lady lay. He went through the routine practice of pulse-feeling,
&c., and proceeded to the table to write a prescription, which, in all
probability, would have been mechanically correct. But here his powers
failed him. In vain he strove to trace the salutary characters, until,
wearied in his attempts, he cast down the pen, and, exclaiming "Drunk, by
G--!" he made his best way out of the house. Two days afterwards he was
not a little surprised by receiving a letter from the lady, enclosing a
check for 100_l._, and promising him the patronage of her family and
friends, if he would observe the strictest secrecy on the state he found
her in. The fact simply was, that the countess had been indulging in
brandy and laudanum, which her abigail had procured for her, and was
herself in the very condition which the doctor had frankly applied to
himself.
Chance, more than science or ability, has frequently brought professional
men to the summit of their business. There is an Eastern story of a
certain prince who had received from a fairy the faculty of not only
assuming whatever appearance he thought proper, but of discerning the
wandering spirits of the departed. He had long laboured under a painful
chronic disease, that none of the court physicians, ordinary or
extraordinary, could relieve; and he resolved to wander about the streets
of his capital until he could find some one, regular or irregular, who
could alleviate his sufferings. For this purpose he donned the garb and
appearance of a dervish. As he was passing through one of the principal
streets, he was surprised to see it so thronged with ghosts, that, had
they been still inhabitants of their former earthly tenements, they must
have obstructed the thoroughfare. But what was his amazement and dismay
when he saw that they were all grouped with anxious looks round the door
of his royal father's physician, haunting, no doubt, the man to whom they
attributed their untimely doom. Shocked with the sight, he hurried to
another part of the city, where resided another physician of the court,
holding the second rank in fashionable estimation. Alas! his gateway was
also surrounded with reproachful departed patients. Thunderstruck at such
a discovery, and returning thanks to the prophet that he was still in
being, despite the practice of these great men, he resolved to submit all
the other renowned practitioners to a similar visit, and he was grieved to
find that the scale of ghosts kept pace with the scale of their medical
rank. Heartbroken, and despairing of a cure, he was slowly sauntering back
to the palace, when, in an obscure street, and on the door of an humble
dwelling, he read a doctor's name. One single poor solitary ghost, leaning
his despondent cheek upon his fleshless hand, was seated on the doctor's
steps. "Alas!" exclaimed the prince, "it is, then, too true that humble
merit withers in the shade, while ostentatious ignorance inhabits golden
mansions. This poor neglected doctor, who has but one unlucky case to
lament, is then the only man in whom I can place confidence." He rapped;
the door was opened by the doctor himself, a venerable old man, not rich
enough, perhaps, to keep a domestic to answer his infrequent calls. His
white locks and flowing beard added to the confidence which his situation
had inspired. The elated youth then related at full length all his
complicated ailments, and the still more complicated treatment to which he
had in vain been submitted. The sapient physician was not illiberal enough
to say that the prince's attendants had all been in error, since all
mankind may err; but his sarcastic smile, the curl of his lips, and the
dubious shake of his hoary head, most eloquently told the anxious patient
that he considered his former physicians as an ignorant, murderous set of
upstarts, only fit to depopulate a community. With a triumphant look he
promised a cure, and gave his overjoyed client a much-valued prescription,
which he carefully confided to his bosom; after which he expressed his
gratitude by pouring upon the doctor's table a purse of golden sequins,
which made the old man's blinking eyes shine as brightly as the coin he
beheld in wondrous delight. His joy gave suppleness to his rigid spine,
and, after bowing the prince out in the most obsequious manner, he
ventured to ask him one humble question: "By what good luck, by what kind
planet, had he been recommended to seek his advice?" The prince naturally
asked for the reason of so strange a question: to which the worthy doctor
replied, with eyes brimful with tears of gratitude, "Oh, sir, because I
considered myself the most unfortunate man in Bagdad until this happy
moment; for I have been settled in this noble and wealthy city for these
last fifteen years, and have only been able to obtain one single
patient."--"Ah!" cried the prince in despair, "then it must be that poor,
solitary, unhappy-looking ghost that is now sitting on your steps!"
It has been observed that religious sects have materially contributed to
the elevation of physicians in society, and political associations have
been equally beneficial. The celebrated Mead was the son of a
non-conforming minister, who, knowing the influence he possessed over his
numerous congregation, brought him up as a physician, in the full
confidence of obtaining the splendid result that rewarded the speculation.
His example was followed by several dissenting preachers; among whom we
may name Oldfield, Clarke, Nesbitt, Lobb, Munckly, whose sons all rose to
extensive and most lucrative practice. At that period, St. Thomas's and
Guy's Hospitals were under the government of Dissenters and Whigs; and so
soon as any one became a physician to the establishment, his fortune was
made. The same advantages attended St. Bartholomew's and Bethlem, both of
royal foundation.
Dr. Meyer Schomberg, who was a poor Jew of Cologne, came to London without
any profession, when, not knowing what to do to obtain a living, to use
his own words, he said, "I am a physician;" and, having thus conferred a
degree upon himself, he sedulously cultivated the acquaintance of all his
fellow Jews about Duke's-place, got introduced to some of their leading
and wealthy mercantile brethren, and a few years after Dr. Schomberg was
in the annual receipt of four thousand pounds. It is rather strange, but
the Jew was succeeded in his lucrative practice by a Quaker. This was the
celebrated Dr. Fothergill. Brought up an apothecary, he took out a Scotch
degree, and, attaching himself to Schomberg, calculated on following his
example; and, on his patron's decease, he slipped into the practice of
both Jew and Gentile.
Amongst many singular instances of good fortune may be mentioned a surgeon
of the name of Broughton, to whom our East India Company may consider
themselves as most indebted, since he was the person who first pointed out
the advantages that might result from trading in Bengal. Broughton
happened to travel from Surat to Agra in the year 1636, when he had the
luck to cure one of the daughters of the Emperor _Shah-Jehan_. To reward
him, this prince allowed him a free trade throughout his dominions.
Broughton immediately repaired to Bengal to purchase goods, which he sent
round by sea to Surat. Scarcely had he returned, when he was requested to
attend the favourite of a powerful nabob, and he fortunately restored her
to health, when, in addition to a pension, his commercial privileges were
still more widely extended; the prince promising him at the same time a
favourable reception for British traders. Broughton lost no time in
communicating this intelligence to the Governor of Surat; and it was by
his advice that the company sent out two large ships to Bengal in 1640.
There are some amusing anecdotes related regarding a vocation for the
medical profession. Andrew Rudiger, a physician of Leipsic, when at
college, made an anagram of his name, and, in the words _Andreas Rudiger_
he found "_Arare Rus Dei Dignus_," or "worthy to cultivate the field of
God." He immediately fancied that his vocation was the church, and
commenced his theological studies. Showing but little disposition for the
clerical calling, the learned Thomasius recommended him to return to his
original pursuits. Rudiger confessed that he had more inclination for the
profession of medicine than the church; but that he had considered the
anagram of his name as a divine injunction. "There you are in error,"
replied Thomasius; "that very anagram calls you to the art of healing; for
_Rus Dei_ clearly meaneth the churchyard."
The subject of quackery, in every sphere of life, whether it be resorted
to by diplomatists or physicians, sanctimonious adventurers or fashionable
_roues_, leads to serious consideration. How comes it that man seems more
anxious to be deceived than enlightened? Simply from the errors of his
education, which foster a love for the marvellous, and induce him to
admire that which really is not or cannot be comprehended. The superiority
of the intellectual faculties of the ancients, at an earlier age than the
generality of men in the present times, is solely to be attributed to
their having been brought up with philosophical views. Mallebranche has
justly said, "that to become a philosopher, we must _see clearly_; but to
be endued with faith, we must _believe blindly_." Although we cannot admit
this axiom in matters of revealed religion, yet in many worldly concerns
it does hold. If a youth was not educated with the scholastic jargon,
commonly called learning, he would be considered ignorant. Helvetius has
said, that man is born ignorant, but not a fool; and that it is even no
easy matter to make him one; and the same writer has very justly divided
stupidity into that which is natural, arising from ignorance, and that
which is acquired and the result of instruction. It is thus that, by
speaking to the passions, naturally weak, and to our desires and
apprehensions, ever ready to grasp at a favourite phantom,--the artful
manage to exercise a more powerful control, and incline persons to believe
what their senses actually discredit. The traffic of hope and fear has
ever been a lucrative trade; and while fear became the staple commodity of
priestcraft, hope was the fortune of medical quacks. The multiplication of
sins increased the profits of the one; the various diseases, real and
imaginary, to which flesh is heir, became the source of emolument to the
other. It is under these cherished impressions of ameliorating our
condition, that many men of common sense, and even of judgment, are
induced to rely on the most absurd and fallacious promises; so prone are
we to believe all that we wish;--the fidelity of a woman, the truth of a
sycophant, and the candour of a flatterer. If there could be established a
regular college of quackery, where the errors of mankind might be studied,
and pupils taught to avail themselves of their follies, as a future
vocation, a more perfect knowledge of the world would be acquired than in
all the universities in Europe. Our sovereigns would be wise in selecting
their ministers amongst the graduates of this academy. Cardinal Du Perron,
who, in a long homily, convinced his sovereign, Henry III., of the
existence of a God, and afterwards informed him that he would prove the
contrary, if it could afford his Majesty any consolation, might have been
selected as a proper rector for such an institution.
It is also to be observed that the founders of all doctrines, however
hypothetical and absurd, have generally assumed a dogmatic language, which
gives to their fallacious assertions an appearance of truth, and Bacon has
long ago said, "Method, carrying a show of total and perfect knowledge,
has a tendency to general acquiescence."
Quackery is considered by many practitioners as necessary to forward the
views of medical men. It is related of Charles Patin, that being on a
visit to a physician at Basle, where his son was studying medicine, he
questioned the youth on the principal studies required to form a
physician; to which the future candidate for medical popularity replied,
"Anatomy, physiology, pathology, and therapeutics." "You have omitted the
chief pursuit," replied his catechiser, "_quackery_."
When we cast our eyes on the absurd names which many Italian academies
adopted to characterize the nature of their studies, we find an ample
illustration of this science in the _Seraphici_, the _Oscuri_, the
_Immaturi_, the _Infecundi_, the _Offuscati_, the _Somnolenti_, and
_Phantastici_!
The most ridiculous and disgusting epithets have been considered
honourable distinctions. Thus, when the science of _Uroscopia_ and
_Uromancy_ prevailed, we find a Dr. Theodorus Charles, a Wirtemberg
physician, calling another learned practitioner, "_Urinosa Claritas_."