Most gracious Lord God, my merciful Father, from my youth up, my
Creator, my Redeemer, my Comforter. Thou (O Lord) soundest and searchest
the depths and secrets of all hearts; thou knowledgest the upright of
heart, thou judgest the hypocrite, thou ponderest men's thoughts and
doings as in a balance, thou measurest their intentions as with a line,
vanity and crooked ways cannot be hid from thee.
Remember (O Lord) how thy servant hath walked before thee: remember what
I have first sought, and what hath been principal in mine intentions. I
have loved thy assemblies, I have mourned for the divisions of thy
Church, I have delighted in the brightness of thy sanctuary. This vine
which thy right hand hath planted in this nation, I have ever prayed
unto thee that it might have the first and the latter rain; and that it
might stretch her branches to the seas and to the floods. The state and
bread of the poor and oppressed have been precious in mine eyes: I have
hated all cruelty and hardness of heart: I have (though in a despised
weed) procured the good of all men. If any have been mine enemies, I
thought not of them; neither hath the sun almost set upon my
displeasure; but I have been as a dove, free from superfluity of
maliciousness. Thy creatures have been my books, but thy Scriptures much
more. I have sought thee in the courts, fields, and gardens, but I have
found thee in thy temples.
Thousands have been my sins, and ten thousand my transgressions; but thy
sanctifications have remained with me, and my heart, through thy grace,
hath been an unquenched coal upon thy altar. O Lord, my strength, I have
since my youth met with thee in all my ways, by thy fatherly
compassions, by thy comfortable chastisements, and by thy most visible
providence. As thy favors have increased upon me, so have thy
corrections; so as thou hast been alway near me, O Lord; and ever as my
worldly blessings were exalted, so secret darts from thee have pierced
me; and when I have ascended before men, I have descended in humiliation
before thee.
And now when I thought most of peace and honor, thy hand is heavy upon
me, and hath humbled me, according to thy former loving-kindness,
keeping me still in thy fatherly school, not as a bastard, but as a
child. Just are thy judgments upon me for my sins, which are more in
number than the sands of the sea, but have no proportion to thy mercies;
for what are the sands of the sea, to the sea, earth, heavens? and all
these are nothing to thy mercies.
Besides my innumerable sins, I confess before thee, that I am debtor to
thee for the gracious talent of thy gifts and graces which I have
neither put into a napkin, nor put it (as I ought) to exchangers, where
it might have made best profit; but mis-spent it in things for which I
was least fit; so as I may truly say, my soul hath been a stranger in
the course of my pilgrimage. Be merciful into me (O Lord) for my
Saviour's sake, and receive me unto thy bosom, or guide me in thy ways.