AN ARRIVAL AND A DEPARTURE
I
Bad-as-Bad was a hardy annual which grew high up among the hills and
pine-forests on the borders of Schafs-Kleider and Schnapps-Wasser. With
its roots extending into both States it flourished exceedingly for three
months of each year. During the winter it was bottled up in its native
passes by snow, and for at least five months no visitors ventured
thither to expose their constitutions to the rigors of its climate or of
its waters. But in another bottled-up form, of a more portable
character, it made a great trade and reputation for itself throughout
Europe; and during the three summer months crowned heads visited it in
turn (often by careful diplomatic arrangement when they or their
countries happened not to be on good speaking terms), and drew after
them a steady influx from that class of their communities on which a
town composed almost entirely of hotels can most safely flourish.
The medicated springs, to which so many came but for which nobody
thirsted, rose in Schnapps-Wasser territory; and being the property of
the reigning house brought to it a huge revenue. Every red-stamped label
broken so carelessly in the restaurants and sanatoria of Europe meant
twopence halfpenny to the princely pocket of its highly descended ruler.
And it was upon these proceeds that the young heir had absented himself
for three years and fitted out an expensive expedition of a
semi-military character to the unexplored wilds of South America.
Behind his back local warfare had gone on. Not for nothing had he said
"crocodiles" to those orchestral scramblings in the bass of an
imperially inspired oratorio; and Schafs-Kleider, receiving certain
mysterious grants in aid (for its own funds were nil), had started to
sink shafts at a lower level on the outskirts of the town; and after
many failures had secured at one point a trickle of water which tasted
suspiciously like the real article, and was declared by interested
experts to be chemically the same.
News had gone out to the Prince in the wilderness that by this
earth-stroke his revenues from the retail business might presently be
very seriously affected.
His remedy had been simple; he had directed the town authorities to lay
out a new cemetery at a strategic point on the slopes lying towards
Schafs-Kleider; and though it had little actual effect upon the chemical
properties of this new breach in his patent it created a prejudice in
unscientific minds, and the Schafs-Kleider variant of the Bad-as-Bad
waters failed to "catch on." And thus it came about that on returning
from his three years' exile Berlin had not restored him to favor, and
he, one of the richest and least encumbered princes in Europe, was more
or less going a-begging--an easy prey to the match-making net which, by
assiduous correspondence, his aunts and others had prepared for him.
Bad-as-Bad, though economically its most important asset, was not the
capital of the principality; but when the Prince arrived at Schnapps,
thirty miles distant, Bad-as-Bad fired off a salute from a toy cannon in
the gardens of the municipality, and hoisted the royal ensign on the
flag-staff beside the kiosk. The principality having been without its
head for three years had recovered it.
On hearing that salute her Majesty, Queen Alicia of Jingalo, at once
knew what it referred to. "Ah!" she remarked, in a tone of complete
satisfaction, "that means that the dear Prince has arrived. What a
distance he has been! I was afraid we might miss him." And as she spoke
her glance traveled across to her daughter Charlotte, and in the peace
and plenitude of her domestic musings she smiled with more meaning than
she was aware of. Princess Charlotte caught sight of that smile, and
sitting observant saw presently that her mother was studying her with
some attention.
"You are looking very well, child," remarked her Majesty. "I am sure
that the place suits you."
"Getting out of the place suits me," said the Princess. "I like the
hills, and the forest. Three miles away one meets nobody, except the
peasantry."
"Well, be sure you don't overdo it; and don't let your face get too
brown. Remember that sort of thing doesn't go with a low dress."
"But I am not wearing low dress while I am here."
"You may be before we go. We may have to give a dinner in the Prince's
honor; or he in ours. Now he has arrived he is sure to come over and see
us. What very nice-sized countries these principalities are! I wish we
had them everywhere, then being kings and queens would be really no
trouble whatever. If Jingalo had only been smaller how much younger it
would have made your father; and, besides, it would have got rid of all
that socialist element."
How it would have done so the dear lady did not stop to explain; she
rattled on merely because she had become aware that Charlotte was
looking at her with a suspiciousness that was rather disconcerting. In
her heart of hearts she was a little bit afraid of Charlotte, or of what
Charlotte might do. She had not the key to her character; and when the
Princess took advantage of a so-called holiday and a change of locality
in order to develop new habits and drop certain conventions--especially
conventions of dress--her Majesty became uneasy. But just now she was
trying for special reasons to drive with a light rein; she wanted
Charlotte to enjoy herself, to feel that in this place she could have
things more her own way than was customary, and so develop associations
which would draw her back to the locality. So far the quite unusual
experiment of accompanying the King to his cure had been a success; the
people of Bad-as-Bad were delighted at the compliment of receiving
Jingalese royalty in the form of a family party; all the aunts and other
female relatives of the absent Prince had been most pleasant and
attentive; and Charlotte herself had responded to the release accorded
her from Court etiquette by becoming wonderfully well and looking really
very handsome.
One day, quite unbeknownst to her mother, she had gone right up the
inside of the green copper spire of the old Rathhaus, and there seated
within its perforated cupola had drunk from a glass of native wine, and
thrown the rest of it, glass and all, down the spire--an ancient custom
which, as she only heard afterwards, entitled its performer, though of
outside extraction, to make her own selection and marry locally.
"So now you have become a native of us," said a chuckling old
Margravine, great-aunt to the Prince, when informed of the exploit by
one of her grand-nephews who had mischievously lured Charlotte on. "Now
you cannot go back!"
For these small princelings were ready enough to make a Jingalese
princess feel at home in their midst. But the whole thing, in view of
its local color, was rather precipitate and indecorous; and when the
Queen heard of it, and of its special application, from the old
match-making Margravine with whom she had shared confidences, she was
aghast. "Charlotte," she cried, "whatever did you do that for?"
"I did it for fun, mamma."
"But, my dear, it was such a very--forward thing to do!"
Why it was so "forward" Charlotte afterwards found out; for the moment
she only thought that she had broken the maternal conventions; things
which she did not hold in much regard.
II
Bad-as-Bad had now been in the enjoyment of its Jingalese visitors for
over a month. The town prided itself on knowing how to behave to
royalty; and every day when the King went down to take the waters, or
strolled in the municipal gardens, people pretended not to look at him;
and only when he was not actually there did the conductor of the famous
band, in the ranks of which operatic first-fiddles kept themselves in
practice during their summer holidays--only then did the conductor throw
out a delicate compliment, for chance ear-shot, by performing, with
variations such as were heard nowhere else, the National Anthem of
Jingalo. But each day the musical program was submitted for his
Majesty's approval; and if he or the Queen made any suggestion--as it
was always hoped they would--then so surely as they approached the kiosk
the strains of that particular selection were heard, telling them that
Bad-as-Bad was always in attendance upon their wishes, always anxious to
give them pleasure, always appreciative of their presence in its midst.
Every day the King paid for his six glasses of water at the
fountain-head; every day he bought a buttonhole from the pretty
flower-seller in peasant costume who was not herself a peasant at all;
every day he bought a Jingalese newspaper at the garden kiosk, and sat
under the shade of the trees reading it; and nobody, looking at him,
would know that even there he was assiduously followed, ringed round and
watched by six detectives, nor could they have any idea how carefully
the bona fides of each newly arrived visitor was examined, inquired
into, and verified all the way back along the route from place of
arrival to place of origin; nay, how thoroughly the luggage of any who
were in the least suspicious was searched behind their backs in order to
discover whether they had any political opinions likely to prove
dangerous to a King taking his holiday.
When the Queen drove out little girls sometimes threw flowers into her
carriage, but never often enough to make it a nuisance or to seem
mechanical; and when they happened to be very small the Queen would stop
and ask them their name and their age and how many brothers and sisters
they had; and then a silver coin would pass to the hands of the patient
little sentinel. And when the Queen had driven on, a large she-bear or
elder sister would come out of the wood and devour it. But everybody
would hear about the domestic inquiries and the gift, and would say what
a really nice lady the Queen was. That is always the great surprise of
the common people when they meet royalty.
But what pleased the inhabitants of Bad-as-Bad most of all was when the
Queen came out and sat upon her balcony in the cool of the evening and
knitted,--doing it, as someone who watched her through opera-glasses was
able to affirm, in the German manner. It was even asserted that she
could turn a heel and narrow at the toes without either looking or
interrupting the flow of her conversation; and we who have had the
cobbling habits of a king of Montenegro held up to us for admiration,
must we not think that this also was a most queenly act and an example
to all haus-fraus?
Princess Charlotte (the reason for whose being with her parents on this
occasion was beginning to leak out) was more elusive in her habits and
was seldom on view. She never took the waters, nor sat in the balcony to
listen to the band; but kept unheard-of hours--early in the morning,
late in the evening--slipping out by back ways and going off on long day
expeditions with only one of her ladies. One day she even got lost and
spent the night at a hill-chalet. On a lake she had been seen rowing:
some said that far out from shore she had actually bathed, but that was
not possible; probably she had only fallen in.
The Queen kept what count of her she could, and now and then would
counsel moderation, or would try to impose it by getting some of the
more elderly gentlemen-in-waiting to join her expeditions. They came
home limping and exhausted; in her pursuit of health and vigor Charlotte
was ruthless.
"They shouldn't come," she said. "If they do, and find it too much for
them, they can sit down at the boundaries and wait for us."
And so she went her own way quite happily, till suddenly there came an
upheaval and all semblance of moderation was thrown aside. The cause of
this upset was the calculated indiscretion of a Berlin newspaper which
had caught Charlotte's eye. There set forth was the story of her ascent
of the Rathhaus spire, there also the local custom with its meaning
carefully explained, there pointed inquiry as to its particular
application if certain rumors were true; and then followed the
circumstantial evidence.
The Princess flamed into her mother's presence, paper in hand. "Is this
true?" she demanded.
"Dear, dear," said the Queen, having read no further than the
preliminary anecdote; "well, you shouldn't do such things!" Then she
came upon commentary and surmise, with dates, chapter, and verse. It did
not amount to very much, but such facts as there were to go upon were
insidiously underlined, and the Prince of Schnapps-Wasser was named.
"Oh, dear," she complained, "I do wish these papers would not be so
previous and officious and meddlesome and pretending to know so much."
"But is it true?" demanded Charlotte.
"Is what true?"
"Is it true that you have brought me here to meet him; that we have been
waiting for him to come; that some one has sent him my photograph and
that he----Oh, it is unbearable!" She broke off and snatched at the
offending paper, that she might once more sear her vision with its
triangular allusions.
"You oughtn't to read such tittle-tattle!" said her mother. "Why can't
you leave the papers alone?"
It was nothing much in itself, the usual coinage of the society
journalist intelligently anticipating events. It pointed with sleek
pleasantry to the fact that the Prince of Schnapps-Wasser, returning to
his inheritance after long exile, would find greeting awaiting him from
a royal house which had apparently been very anxious to make his
acquaintance. Then followed an account of the visit and prolonged
sojourn at Bad-as-Bad of the royal family of Jingalo; the beauty of the
Princess was spoken of, her accomplishments, her exploits in climbing
and walking; it was rumored that even in South America her photograph
had been seen and admired. It was known that the Prince had arrived
unexpectedly at his port of departure, and finding a boat on the point
of sailing had gone on board. Was it the knowledge that only till a
certain date----? The rest we need not set down here. As though it would
help her to blot out the record with its attendant circumstances,
Princess Charlotte tore the paper into little pieces.
"My dear, don't be so violent!" said the Queen.
"I have been brought here so that he may come and look at me!" cried the
Princess, white with wrath. The Queen took up her knitting.
"Nothing of the sort; you were brought here to be with us and to be kept
out of mischief."
"Why are we staying a fortnight longer than we intended to?"
"I don't know what you mean by 'we'; I intended to stay till your father
had completed his cure. This year it has taken longer."
"It hasn't! He is putting on weight again; only yesterday he told me so.
You can't get more cured when that has begun, because it means that you
are acclimatized."
"It's no use your talking as if you were a medical authority, my dear,
and offering your advice, for we shan't take it."
Charlotte opened her mouth and bottled a breath before she next spoke.
"Who sent him my photograph?"
"Gracious me, child, anybody can get your photograph. Isn't it in all
the shop-windows?"
"Not in South America."
"Oh, yes; they are getting quite civilized over there now."
Charlotte struck at a venture.
"_You_ sent it; you know you did! Yes, and then he sent you that thing
of himself."
"My dear Charlotte," said the Queen composedly, "you needn't get
excited; these little exchanges do sometimes happen quite naturally in
the course of correspondence, and I have a great deal of correspondence
as you know. Now do forget everything that foolish newspaper has been
saying, and look at the thing sensibly. Isn't it my duty to give you
every chance of meeting those--those whom it is suitable for you to
meet? Are you always going to begin by saying you won't know people?"
"Begin what?" Charlotte shot the question; the Queen turned it aside and
went on.
"Now here is a case: this young man who has been away three years among
savages--I wonder he wasn't eaten by them--running into all sorts of
dangers and doing a lot of foolish brave things that he needn't have
done; and then his uncle, the Prince, dying behind his back and
everything left to a regency waiting his return. Isn't it quite natural,
seeing how things are, that he should be wishing to settle down? Now I
am going to be quite frank with you. He has seen your photograph, I
know; but I didn't send it to him, and he didn't send me his. We heard
that he intended coming to see us--to Jingalo, I mean--and after that I
got it; as a matter of fact his aunt, the Margravine, sent it to me; and
I, in exchange, sent her yours."
"Ah! so that was why she came to see us directly we got here, and why
she looked at me so, and kept asking me so many questions about myself.
I couldn't understand it at the time--her being so curious. But you
knew, yes, you knew!"
"Well, what if I did?"
"Oh!" cried the Princess, "why, why was I born?"
And then her indignation broke loose, and she became, as the Queen
afterwards remarked to her husband when describing the scene, "most
unreasonable, and more violent than any one could believe."
After about ten minutes of it her Majesty rose quietly from her chair
and rang the bell.
III
A message came to the King that her Majesty wished to see him.
When he arrived in the Queen's boudoir he found his wife sitting in all
her accustomed composure; and yet somehow the scene suggested
disturbance. Away from her mother at the furthest window stood
Charlotte, a charmingly disheveled figure; flushed and bright-eyed she
was looking out over the Platz and mopping vehemently at her nose with a
handkerchief.
"Don't do that there!" remarked the Queen, "any one might see you."
"Why shouldn't they? They'd only think that I had a cold."
"It isn't the time of the year for colds. Either leave off, or come away
from the window."
"There, you see!" cried Charlotte, stung to fresh exasperation, "I can't
even stand where I like now!"
"What is the matter?" inquired the King.
"Tell your father what you have been saying," said the Queen, finding it
better that the culprit herself should explain.
"I don't know what I've been saying."
"I should think not; it didn't sound like it. Now that you've got both
parents to listen to you, talk to them and tell them your mind."
This threw Charlotte into a fresh paroxysm. "Oh, why did I ever have
parents?" she cried.
"Yes, that appears to be the trouble," said the Queen. "John, this is a
revolting daughter. I've heard of them, and now I've got the thing
brought home to me. Look at her!"
"What are you revolting about, my dear?" inquired the King kindly.
"Everything!" exclaimed Charlotte.
"Quite true," said the Queen, "everything."
"Well, begin at the beginning." And Charlotte screwed herself up to
speak.
"I came to talk to mamma about something," she said, "something that
mattered very much. I suppose you know about it too."
The Queen gave her husband an informing look.
"And what do you think she did?" Charlotte continued. "First she told me
not to be foolish; and after that, to everything I said she went
on--just as if she didn't hear me--knitting, knitting!"
"She says," interrupted the Queen, "that she is not going to marry
anybody, and particularly not the Prince, because she hates him. I say
how can she know when she hasn't seen him."
"I won't marry him!" cried Charlotte, "I've seen his photograph."
"Yes, and you liked it," said her mother. This did not improve matters.
"But nobody is forcing you to marry him," said the King. "I don't know
why it has even been mentioned." And, seeking a clue, he cast a troubled
glance at the Queen.
"It's in all the papers!" retorted Charlotte, indulging in poetic
license. "And you know it! Yes, he is coming here to look at me, to see
if he likes me, and to see if I can pretend to like him. But I won't be
looked at, it's an indignity I won't stand. I'll not even see him!"
"But why ever not?" exclaimed her father.
Charlotte wriggled with impatience.
"Oh, can't you see? Supposing he comes and does look at me; and then
goes away without--without caring!--That's what you are asking me to put
up with. For me to know, and for him to know, and for him to know that I
know! How would you like it yourself?"
"I tell her she is very ridiculous," said the Queen. "A Princess can't
marry a mushroom. Does she want to fall in love with her eyes shut.
Something has to be done beforehand, or we should never be anywhere----"
"I don't want to be anywhere," said the Princess.
"Outside a lunatic asylum," said her mother, completing the sentence.
"My dear child," put in the King, "don't you see that nothing is really
settled--and will not be until you agree to it?"
"Then why did you ever tell him anything about it? Why couldn't we have
just met? It's this picking of us out beforehand behind our backs, and
then telling us of it; that's what I can't stand!"
"My dear, nobody is forcing you," repeated the King persuasively.
"Then I won't see him."
"I tell her she must," remarked the Queen in a tone of comfortable
finality.
"Mamma, will you stop knitting!" cried Charlotte. "You treat me as if I
were an insect!"
"You have got the brains of one," retorted her mother. "John, will you
please speak to her? Perhaps you can understand what it all means; I
can't. She has been talking Greek to me--something or other about the
Trojans."
"Yes; the Trojan women," corrected Charlotte.
"She says she's like one of them!"
"So I am."
"I don't know which one, you mentioned so many."
"All of them. Yes, papa, they had to go and live with foreigners--men
they had never seen."
"Don't say 'live with'; it's an objectionable term."
"Die with them, then: some did! One of them killed a king in his bath;
at least his wife did, but it's all the same."
"Yes; she began quoting some verses to me about that bath affair," said
the Queen. "And I must say they didn't sound to me quite decent."
Charlotte was quite ready to repeat it.
"Oh, don't quote poetry to me!" begged the King. "I don't understand
it."
"And I try not to," said the Queen. So Charlotte's quotation was ruled
out of the discussion.
"Don't you think, my dear," persuaded her father, "that meeting him
here, as it just so happens, will seem sufficiently accidental?"
"Not after we've waited for him all this time; not after I climbed up
that spire and threw my cap at him without knowing it," said the
Princess. "Oh, you don't know what that paper has been saying!" And she
pointed to the bits.
The King stooped and began gathering them up.
"It's all nonsense, John," said the Queen. "Don't indulge her by paying
any attention."
And at that renewed proof of her mother's imperviousness of mind
Princess Charlotte ran out of the room.
"Leave her alone!" remarked the Queen, sure of her own sagacity, "she'll
calm down. My belief is that she really likes him. _I_ saw her looking
at his photograph; it wasn't only once, either."
IV
Three days later the King and Queen of Jingalo were at home by special
appointment to receive a call of ceremony. The streets of Bad-as-Bad
were hung with flags--here and there of the two nationalities, side by
side, their corners (delicate symbol!) tied together by a knot of white
ribbon.
Grooms of the Chamber had donned full Court dress for the occasion, and
a complete staff of servants, equerries, attachés, and ministers in
attendance lined the route from the portico of the converted hotel which
served as the King's villa to the large private apartment where the
actual meeting took place.
"His Royal Highness, Grand Duke and Hereditary Prince of
Schnapps-Wasser," pronounced the Master of Ceremonies in that awestruck
tone which is exclusively reserved for the introduction of crowned heads
or territorial princes; and a youthful giant, six feet four in height,
entered the room, struck his heels together with military precision, and
bowed low.
He wore his own clothes--one of his own uniforms, that is to say--and
the King of Jingalo wore one of his, for they had not hitherto exchanged
regiments in token of peace and amity--a matter to be put right on a
future occasion.
The Prince wore sky-blue trimmed with sable, and brightened with silver
facings; tunic and trousers of an extremely tight fit set off a muscular
frame. From his shoulders, presumably in case of accident, hung an extra
tunic; but the other extra did not show. Boots reaching to the thighs
and a head-dress of almost equal height borne upon the arm, completed
the splendor of his array. Bowing his way in, he had so martial an air
that the Queen's heart was quite won by it, and she regretted that
Charlotte, belated in her attendance, had not been there to see.
The Prince uttered with correctness, though in a rather heavy German
accent, the formula of royal greeting; and throughout the interview
continued to speak in Jingalese. As soon as the doors were
closed--leaving only royalty, he dropped into homelier speech. "I hope
the cure has done you no harm," he said, "that it has not too greatly
diverted your digestion; some people are much upset by it."
The King and Queen hastened to reassure him. Bad-as-Bad, its air, its
waters, and its society had treated them in the handsomest way
possible. "We are quite sorry," said the Queen, "that so soon we shall
have to leave."
The Prince glanced round before asking abruptly: "And the Princess--she
is still here?"
"She will be here presently," answered the Queen, "I am expecting her
any moment. She goes on long walks," she added, by way of explanation.
"Ah, good!" commented the Prince.
Many minutes went by, conversation alternately flowed and halted. They
were all conscious of an impediment, for still the Princess did not
appear; and at last her Majesty was impelled to send one of her ladies
to make inquiry. "She takes such very long walks," explained the Queen
once more.
"Ah, good, very good indeed," remarked the Prince in a spirit of
acceptance.
And then, after a little more waiting, the lady came back to say that
the Princess could not be found; she and one of her ladies had gone out
together.
"How very forgetful of her!" exclaimed the Queen.
Just then, very discreetly, but with a look full of meaning, a private
secretary came and put a telegram into the King's hand. Excusing himself
to the Prince he opened it; it was postmarked from the station office at
Schnapps, and it read thus--
"I have gone home. Charlotte."
It was no use; the surprise of it was too much for him. "She has run
off!" he ejaculated; the compromising phrase had slipped out before he
was aware.
"Who?" cried his wife, though knowing quite well.
"Charlotte; she has gone home."
Husband and wife stared at each other mute and amazed; while the Prince
sat trying with amiable look to excuse himself for being there.
Then the Queen did her best to cover matters; but it was not a great
success. "I knew that she wanted to get home," she murmured. "And she is
so impulsive; sometimes there is no holding her at all."
"I must apologize," said the King. "This is really quite unaccountable."
The Prince's eye flashed with a curious light; he smiled good-humoredly.
"I think it is very interesting," said he. "When will it be allowed that
I shall see her?"