"No use whatever. One good one would be enough for everybody--and save
heaps of trouble."
"But the Christian religion is the best, isn't it--to go to heaven
with?"
"That's hard to say. Nobody really knows. It's a good Sunday religion,
but it doesn't seem to work so well week days."
"I guess it's safer than any of the others, isn't it?"
"Possibly. But you needn't decide in a hurry, Cyrus. Take your time and
look around a little."
"Do people always look around before choosing their religion?"
Dr. Alton laughed. "No, they do not. In fact, it is considered a sign
of moral depravity to think too much for yourself in those matters. To
be at peace with mankind you must follow your neighbors. It is all
merely a matter of geography. When you know the name of the country you
know their religious beliefs. There is not much thinking done."
"That's funny," said Cyrus. "But a Christian is lots better than any of
the others--isn't he?"
Again Dr. Alton smiled. "Well, he himself thinks he is. But all virtue
is not centered in the Christian. When you get up to-morrow and wish to
get well and strong you will begin to eat again, won't you?"
"Gracious! I guess I will! I could eat a house."
"Yes, you will be hungry enough. And you will feel like eating quite a
variety of things, I suppose."
"Oh, won't I!" And as Cyrus spoke the pallor of the Saint was submerged
in a glow of fleshly desire.
"Good! And you shall have it! Now we will play, for a minute, that
Christianity is pie."
"Is what?"
"Is pie. Just pie. But there are various creeds of pie among the
Christians; there's apple, pumpkin, mince, squash, cocoanut, and all
the others."
"Me for cocoanut!" exclaimed the invalid. "Cocoanut pie beats 'em all!"
"That's a matter of taste. But you prefer cocoanut pie to all the
others?"
"Oh, yes!"
"Very well. Now there's apple for Methodist, mince for Episcopalian,
cocoanut for Unitarian, pumpkin for Congregationalist, and so on,
through the list."