[118] Ham.
+ _Of the preste that wolde say two gospels for a grote._ lxxi.
+ Somtyme there dwelled a preest in Stretforde vpon Auyne of small
lernyng, which vndeuoutly sange masse and oftentymes twyse on one day.
So it happened on a tyme, after his seconde masse was done in shorte
space, nat a myle from Stretforde there mette with hym dyuers marchaunte
men whiche wolde haue harde masse, and desyred hym to synge masse and he
shuld haue a grote; whiche answered them and sayd: syrs, I wyll say
masse no more this day; but I wyll say you two gospels for one grote,
and that is dogge chepe [for] a masse in any place in Englande.
By this tale a man may se, that they that be rude and unlerned regarde
but lytell the meryte and goodness of holy prayer.
+ _Of the coutear that dyd cast the frere ouer the bote._ lxxii.
_Too much damaged to decypher._
+ _Of the frere that prechyd what mennys sowles were._ lxxiii.
+ A precher in pulpet whiche prechyd the worde _of God, amonge other_
matters spake of mennes soules and sayd _that the soule was so_ subtyll
that a thousande soules myght daunce _on the space of the nayle of a_
mannes fynger. Amonge which audyence there was a mery conceyted _fellow_
of small deuocyon that answered and sayde thus: mayster doctour, if a
thousande soules may daunce on a mannes nayle, I praye you than, where
shall the pyper stande?
By this tale a man may se, that it is but foly to shewe or to teche
vertue to them, that haue no pleasure nor mynde therto.
+ _Of the husbande that cryed ble under the bed._ lxxiv.
+ In London there was a certayne artifycer hauyng a fayre wife, to whom
a lusty galante made pursute to accomplisshe his pleasure. This woman,
denyeng, shewed the matter vnto her husband whiche, moued therewith, bad
his wyfe to appoynte him a tyme to come secretly to lye with her all
nyght, and with great crakes and othes sware that, agaynst his comyng,
he wolde be redy harneysed and wolde put him in ieopardye of his lyfe,
except he wolde make hym a great amendes. Thys nyght was then appoynted;
at whiche tyme thys courtyer came at his houre, and entred in at the
chamber, and set his two-hande sworde downe, and sayde these wordes:
stande thou there, thou sworde, the dethe of thre men! This husbande
lyenge vnder the bedde in harneys, herynge these wordes, lay still for
fere. The courtyer anone gat him to bed with the wyfe about his
prepensed busynesse; and within an houre or two the husbande, beynge
wery of lyenge, beganne to remoue hym. The courtyer, that hearynge,
asked the wyfe what thinge that was that remoued vnder the bedde;
whiche, excusyng the matter, sayd it was a lytell shepe, that was wonte
dayly to go about the house; and the husbande, that herynge, anone
cryed _ble_, as it had ben a shepe. And so in conclusyon, whan the
courtyer sawe his tyme, he rose and kissed the wyfe, and took his leaue
and departed. And as sone as he was gone the husbande arose; and, whan
the wyfe loked on him, somwhat abasshed began to make a sad countenance;
and [she] sayde; alas! syr, why did you * *
_The remainder of this tale is wanting._
_By this tale ye may se_, that he is not wyse that will put his
confydence _in bosters_ and great crakers, whiche ofte tymes wyll do but
ly_tell, when it comes to_ the poynte.
+ _Of the shomaker that asked the colyer what tydynges in hell._[119] lxxv.
+ A souter[120] syttynge in his shope, that sawe a colyer come by,
_deryded hym_, because he was so blacke, and asked hym, what newes from
hell and howe the deuyll fared. To whome the colyer answeryd hym: he
was well, whan I sawe hym laste; for he was rydynge _and waited_ but for
a souter to plucke on his botes.
By this ye may se that he that vseth to deryde other folkes is somtyme
him selfe more deryded and mocked.