CHAPTER IV

AT RIPON AND THE ISLE OF MAN

"My Memory is the frame of a thousand pictures."

* * * * *

"The blithe April weather of a child's life."

As soon as I saw Ripon, I disliked the place. There were no hills to

which I could lift up my eyes, it was a little town squatting among

fat green meadows, and by the still waters of three rivers, the Laver,

the Ure, and the Skell. The houses were generally small, and roofed

with red tiles, and the atmosphere of the place self-satisfied, and

decently prosperous. The theological element was distinctly ascendent

and I, though a daughter of Levi, did not like it. There were also at

that time many ancient customs prevailing, and the queer little place

only wanted a few monks strolling about the quiet streets, to make one

wonder if they had stepped back into the twelfth century. The modern

spirit touching so vividly the West Riding and other parts of England,

had not reached Ripon. It retained a monastic air, though there was

neither a monastery nor a monk in it. Still the people looked as if

they were always going to church, and indeed they did go to church a

great deal. I found out later that the whole history of Ripon was

blended with churchism, though its one famous manufacture was spurs.

"As true steel as Ripon rowels," is a proverb still applied to men of

mettle, trusty and faithful. When I was there it appeared to me that

all the craftsmen were saddle-makers.

The dominant power in Ripon was not, however, the bishop; it was the

Earl of Grey and Ripon, a man of immense wealth and of great political

influence. I saw him frequently, but somehow he lacked the romance

that fixed Lonsdale in my memory. I forgot him for nearly fifty years,

and then this thing happened. In 1891 I wrote to London for a full

set of the _Saturday Review_, stipulating that it should be

second-hand and in good condition. When it arrived at Cherry Croft, I

opened the boxes that contained the books eagerly, and lifted one out

to examine it. The set was fine and perfect, and contained a most

elaborate and beautiful book plate of the Earl of Grey and Ripon.

Nearly the whole sixty volumes were ornamented with the Earl's plate,

though in some it was more ornate, than in others. But by what chance

these volumes had been cast out of the magnificent library of Studley

Royal, the grandest residence in England, and found their way to my

little cottage on Storm King, New York, I do not know. Their once

lordly owner I had forgotten for fifty years, but now I often remember

the handsome, aristocratic George, Frederick, Samuel, Earl of Grey and

Ripon.

But withal it was a comfortable well-to-do place and Mother put away

cheerfully all fault-finding. Yet our house was not well situated and

was much too small. My father looked around dubiously. Ann Oddy

wondered if Ripon chapel people knew that Mr. Huddleston had three

children, and Jane cast her eyes down on the tesselated brick floor of

the living-room, and remarked in a general manner, "The floor is made

of brick."

"This will never do, Mary," Father said.

"Oh, yes, William!" Mother answered. "I will carpet the floor, and the

woman who was here waiting to receive us, pointed out the brick floor

and called it 'beautiful.' She said they are favorite floors in Ripon.

I shall make all pretty and comfortable in a few days."

Mother kept her promise. In a few days the little house was a pretty

place, and even Ann could find nothing against it, but its small size.

"There are three children," she said, "and God willing there may be

four, and where are we to sleep them all?"

"Plenty of room, Ann," answered Mother. "Mr. Huddleston is going to

make the parlor his study. His books will furnish the four bare walls

handsomely."

"And what about company, ma'am?" asked Ann. "There will be lots of

trouble, if they are put in the parlor, and the Master writing his

sermon."

"When Mr. Huddleston is writing a sermon, we will bring them in here,

Ann."

"And suppose we are just ready for dinner or tea? What then, ma'am?"

"Then Ann, we will ask them to join us," and Mother laughed

pleasantly, and added, "Your cooking, Ann, would be a great treat to

them."

In a fortnight the house being settled, the question was schools.

There was no choice on this subject, there being only one ladies'

school. It was kept by the Misses Johnston, three very handsome women

who were daughters of one of the old hunting, racing, drinking

squires, called "fine old English gentlemen." At his death, there was

nothing left for his daughters, and they opened a school. Jane and I

were entered as pupils there, but I did not find in any of the three,

another Miss Pearson. They were unfitted for teachers and appeared to

dislike the office, and though I learned the lessons set me, I made no

particular progress in anything but music. In this study my teacher

was a French emigrant, and I learned rapidly under his tuition.

We had not been half a year in this school, when a momentous question

arose. A girl called Mary Levine came one day, and she was entered for

all the senior classes, as well as for music, dancing, drawing and

French. We all concluded that her father must be very rich, but Miss

Grey, the daughter of one of the Canons of the Cathedral, said she had

never heard of the Levines, and she did not believe they were anybody

at all. For a few days suppositions as to Miss Levine's social

standing were rife. Then it was discovered that she was the daughter

of Daniel Levine, a Jewish jeweler and money lender. Instantly every

one drew away from the girl, and she was shocked and amazed at the

scorn and animosity shown towards her. I saw her tearfully talking to

Miss Johnston one evening as the dismissed school was leaving the

room, and when I reached home I told Mother what I had heard and

seen.

Mother advised us not to name the subject in my father's presence,

but this advice was rendered nugatory by events which had to be met

and decided on; for Mr. Downes, the banker, the Reverend Mr. Eamont,

Canon Grey and several others removed their daughters the next day

from school, pending Miss Johnston's decision as to opening her school

to Jewish children. Every day there were more defections, and the

distracted ladies sent a messenger to each patron of the school,

asking them to answer by "yes" or "no" the following question:

"Do you object to your daughters associating with the Jewess, Mary

Levine, in the classes of our school?

"The Misses Johnston."

The long roll of patron's names came to Father among the last, and

Mother noticed that the answer in every case had been a positive

"yes." Father took the roll, and without consulting any one, wrote

hurriedly but decidedly, "Yes, I object."

I do not believe there was one reply favorable to the Jewish girl, and

yet I could see no fault in her, nor any reason for her dismissal; and

the school was much thinned by the circumstances, and I disliked it

more than ever. Nor did her ejection from the school restore

confidence. Several of the older pupils went to a celebrated boarding

school at York, and others to Harrogate, and an air of dissatisfaction

pervaded the class rooms.

As the spring opened I was sick. Father said, "No wonder!" He himself

felt the change "from the clear, mountain air of Penrith, to the damp

heavy atmosphere of Ripon." The doctor said I had some kind of an

ague, and gave me Jesuit's bark. I had never been sick in all my life,

and the feeling of inertia, and the abominable Jesuit's bark, made me

miserable. I was taken from school, and told to "amuse myself." But

books had become uninteresting. I had a headache, and it hurt me to

read, and the Jesuit's bark made every day a sickening terror. We call

Jesuit's bark quinine now, and have it in little white capsules, and

are not conscious of its taste; but any one needing quinine in those

days had to take a decoction of the bark of the tree--a whole tumbler

full of the black, nauseous liquid three times a day. Jane had no

ague, and was quite happy at school; for she was fond of embroidery,

and was working a petticoat for Mother in a new kind of that art--the

same kind that has been fashionable for the last three or four years,

which is accomplished by cutting holes in the cloth and then seaming

them around.

One day in early June, I was lying on a sofa which stood in the

parlor-study, and Father was writing. I can listen now as I write, and

hear the scratching of his quill pen upon the paper. Suddenly a

gentleman came riding rapidly to our door, and asked for Mr.

Huddleston. My father lifted his head at the sound of the voice,

listened a moment, threw down his pen and rose to go out of the room,

but before he could do so the stranger entered, and then it was

"William!" "Thomas!" and they clasped hands and sat down together. I

had no mind to go away, unless sent, and I closed my eyes and lay

still as if asleep.

Their conversation soon became animated and argumentative, though it

was about people and places I had no knowledge of; but finally reached

a subject then interesting all clever and thoughtful minds--the

Tractarian or High Church Movement. As I had read to Father several

small pamphlets "Tracts for the Times" I was familiar with the names

they constantly quoted--Newman, Keble, Froude, et cetera, but it was

Newman they disputed over. The stranger seemed to dislike Newman. He

said he was no better than a Calvinist, and had been brought up by his

Calvinistic mother on Watts and Romaine and such teachers, that he was

pale and thin, had a poor presence, and was more like a Wesleyan

preacher than a pillar of the Church. Father spoke hotly, and said he

never thought of Newman's appearance, his influence was something like

magic, and that you could not be fifteen minutes in his company, and

not feel yourself invited to take an onward step. I liked the stranger

for not liking Newman, for Newman's writing was the hardest and least

interesting reading I did for Father.

I was enjoying the dispute, when Ann Oddy tapped at the door, and told

father he was wanted a few minutes. Then I stepped off the sofa, and

went to the stranger.

"Well now!" he cried, "who are you, my little maid?"

I said I was Mr. Huddleston's daughter, and my name was Amelia.

"And you were on the sofa all the time?" he continued.

"Yes," I replied, "I am sick."

"Nonsense!" he ejaculated, but I assured him the doctor said I had an

ague, and I had been obliged to take Jesuit's bark.

"Jesuit's bark! That is enough to make any one sick. Come with me to

Richmond farm, and I will give you new milk in place of it. You can

get up early, and go with the dawn maids and see the big Durhams

milked. I will have a pony saddled for you, and you can ride all over

the farm at my side. And the red Morella cherries are just ripe, and

the strawberries coming on, and the raspberries not a month behind.

And there are hundreds of hens, and you could go with Tabitha, the

hen-wife, and see her clear the nests, and feed the chickens--such a

lot of them! And I have the prettiest and kindest of house-keepers;

she is called Mary, and she will be good and kind to you. Will you

come to Richmond farm with me?"

I told him that I would like it better than anything else in the

world, and then I asked, "Would you like me to come?"

"That I would!" he answered heartily, and as he did so, my father

re-entered the room with Mother on his arm. Mother had put on her new

muslin gown; it was a white muslin, with a tiny pink rosebud in it,

and her black hair was beautifully dressed in that Madonna style

introduced by Queen Victoria. "I have the prettiest mother in all the

world," I thought, and I went to her side, and clasped her hand.

So the stranger, whom I heard introduced to my mother as Mr. Thomas

Richmond ate dinner with us, and this proposal to take me for a few

weeks to Richmond farm, was gladly accepted.

[Illustration: REV. WILLIAM HENRY HUDDLESTON]

I was to stay a few weeks, but I stayed most of my time at this farm

for two years and a half, and if to be innocently joyful and busy and

perfectly free from all care and anxiety is to be happy, then surely

these years were the happiest years of my life. A child in Paradise

may be as happy, but no earth child could have been more fortunate

than I was. Everything was so much better than I expected; yes, I can

see the widespreading house amid its trees and gardens as I write, and

when I go to Heaven, I would like my angel to pass it on the road, and

let me look once more into its sunny rooms.

I soon learned to manage my pony, and I usually rode into Ripon with

Mr. Richmond on market days, took my music lesson, and then went home

until I was called for. The housekeeper Mary taught me all about milk,

cream and butter. I pulled cherries, ate cherries, and made cherry

pies, and I knew every hen and chicken on the place. I was very

friendly with the gardener, and from him I learned all about

vegetables, fruits and flowers. If there was a superstition or story

about any flower, he knew it; and he told it to me, generally with the

flower in my hand. Thus a lady to whose house I often went to practice

my music, gave me one day a pot of myrtle, and I took it at once to

the old man. I said, "I want it planted."

"Well then, Missie, you must plant it yourself," he replied; "for when

myrtle is planted, you must spread out your skirt, and look as proud

as you can. I say put it in your window, for myrtle is the luckiest

plant for the window, and water it morning and night, looking as proud

as you can while doing so. Myrtle is a proud plant, and it loves proud

people." On another day, I was going into the house with a branch of

flowering white hawthorn.

"Nay! nay!" he cried to me, "you mustn't carry white hawthorn into the

house. You might go to sleep where it is, and then would come great

misfortune." He looked very differently on a handful of rosemary.

"That is all right, is all right," he said. "Rosemary stands for

success in everything." In the very centre of the garden he had a

little bed of grass, and he would not suffer tool of any kind to touch

it. He called it "good man's croft," and told me that in order "to

bring luck, we must always leave a bit of land unplanted for the

fairies."

After I had been about a month at the farm, Mr. Richmond said to me

one wet day, "Milly, I have had all my grandfather's books taken into

the library. I want you to sort and shelve them for me. Would you like

to do that?"

I knew of nothing I would like half as much, for, as soon as I was

well, the thought of books was again a joy to me. We went to the

library together, and men were unpacking large boxes of books, and

bringing a long table on which to sort them, and a set of library

steps, pens, ink, pencils, paper, and so forth. I promised only to

sort the books in the afternoon, or when too wet to take my usual

morning ride with him about the farm. Then he gave me the key of the

room, and left me among a thousand books.

I was so happy! I was so happy! So peacefully, innocently happy! I

read more than I sorted; I found so many wonderful books, that it was

impossible to pass over. I met _Ivanhoe_ first in that room, and

_Little Nell_, and _Pamela_, and the _Scottish Chiefs_, and in a pile

of unbound _Family Heralds_ I made acquaintance with the short love

story. Never shall I forget what thrilling hours I spent in that room

with the "Children of the Abbey." A year or two ago a lady to whom I

named this book, said she had a copy, and would send it to me. I sat

down, full of expectation, but alas! though the book was there, I

could not summon back the child heart to read it. The tale that stole

my heart away when I was eleven years old had nothing to say to me

when I was seventy-seven. Yet I touched it tenderly as I whispered,

"It charmed me once--I will not spoil that memory," and so closed it

forever.

I thank God that ere any change came over days so beautiful and

blessed, they ceased. The library was scarce finished, when I had to

leave it; the farm life was just as happy and desirable, when I

tearfully bade it good-bye forever. The pretty, clever Mary loved me

well, and I had become a real companion to my affectionate friend, who

liked me to call him "Uncle Thomas." It was well to part ere any

desire for parting came. Mr. Richmond said he would come for me the

following summer, but I knew he would not. I felt sure he would marry

Mary, and other interests would occupy him. I said good-bye to

Richmond Farm in a fortunate hour. Its memory has sweetened my long,

long life, and what I learned in its pleasant rooms, its hay fields,

and wheat fields, and cool, sweet dairy, has helped me in many a

stress of life, that I then never dreamed of.

The inevitable has always found me ready and hopeful, and I was glad

we were going to the Isle of Man. I had never consciously seen the

sea, but its tides were surely in my blood. I was much excited at the

prospect, and Father was as eager and restless as a boy. It called him

now, as it had called his fathers before him, and he was impatient of

delay. We went in a little steamer called _The King Orry_, sailing

from Liverpool. And, as I walked with him about the deck, we were both

silent with emotion. But I felt quite at home. The motion of the boat

was natural, and, when I walked to the wheel, I could scarcely keep my

hands off it. I knew I could manage it. The salt breeze, and the smell

of the sea, went to my head like wine.

"Oh, Father!" I cried. "I wish that I might live always on the

tide-top."

"The tide-top!" he echoed. "Who taught you those words, Milly?"

"Nobody," I answered. "They just came to me. Are they not right words,

Father?"

"Yes," he answered slowly. "Your grandfather used them frequently. The

last words he said to my mother were, 'Fear not, Milly! I shall try to

keep my ship on the tide-top.'"

"But he did not, Father."

"No--no! He found a sailor's grave. I will go and bring John here."

In a few minutes he returned with an armful of pillows, and then he

carried my brother in his arms to the deck. I have never seen since

such a transfiguration of Joy. The boy clapped his thin, white hands,

and cried out, "_The Sea! The Sea! The Sea!_" His face glowed and

shone, and he took deep breaths of the salt air. So he sat all day,

feeding his heart on the sight of the blue, tossing waves, and some

wild pageant of memories far far off, and hardly to be caught, as they

threw the accumulated past upon his consciousness, very much as that

last vision clangs and flashes for a drowning man.

A never-to-be-forgotten, quiet, thoughtful day, and in the autumn

gloaming we landed at Douglas, and the next morning took a carriage

for the ten-mile ride, which would take us to Castletown, then the

capital of Man, and the place of our destination. With a lavish hand

Nature has beautified this wonderful little island, thirty-three miles

long, by thirteen miles wide, with the most exquisite scenes of sylvan

loveliness, while the Gulf Stream laves all its rocky shores, giving

it a climate such as we may have in Paradise. In the hottest month of

the year the temperature is a little below sixty degrees, in the

coldest month it is a little above forty-one.

Our ride to Castletown was an enchanting one. It was on a day at the

end of August, sunny and pleasantly warm. Such wealth of flowers! such

multitudes of singing birds! I had never before seen or heard. And the

sea was on every side of us! As we approached the capital we saw first

the noble old fortress of the Lords of Man, lifting its huge bulk in

the very centre of the town. It was but a small place, built of gray

stone, in narrow winding streets, and so old that its very origin is

lost in the mists of antiquity. Certainly it is one of the oldest, if

not the oldest, town in Great Britain. It looked to me as if it had

_always_ existed.

As we passed through the square of which the castle forms one side, we

saw a fine regiment of Highlanders, in their picturesque costume,

drilling, and a few ladies and some old gentlemen were sauntering

along, stopping occasionally to watch some manoeuver that interested

them. An air of the utmost serenity pervaded the place, as we turned

into a long crooked street called Malew Street, and stopped finally at

a house whose door stood open to receive us. It was a large-roomed,

sunny house, of three stories, and had a fine garden at the back,

stretching almost to the river side. The rooms were comfortably

furnished, and full of peace, and I caught and answered my mother's

look of pleasure and satisfaction. In a few days all was in order, and

we settled down to what promised to be three years of delightful

life.

For two years all our hopes were amply satisfied. I was at a good

school: I was in the fishers' cottages. I was in a boat with John and

my father, or I was off with Father to the preachings at Ballasalla,

or Ballabeg. I had many friends, and among them was Chrisna, the

daughter of the master of Rushen Castle. With her I wandered about the

wonderful old palace, learning its history in the very rooms wherein

that history was made. The whole huge fabric was an historical romance

written in stone. Chrisna was a Manx girl, of long Manx descent, and

she knew all the traditions and superstitions of her people. She

believed in fairies as firmly as she believed in the Gospels, and

indeed I never met either a Manx man or a Manx woman who did not

believe in fairies. Chrisna told me with perfect honesty that she had

seen them often, and heard their music, and she quite convinced me

that she had.

Seventy years ago the Isle of Man was little more than a name to the

average Briton. It had its own government, its own laws, and its own

House of Parliament, which was called the "House of Keys." There were

no Custom Houses, and no duties. There were no Poor Laws. When I was

there those in need were empowered to knock at the door of every

householder, once a week, and receive what could be given. There was

no stipulated sum, but a penny and a few groceries, or a little

clothing, was cheerfully spared. The number of such callers were few,

and they were kindly treated.

The small sum it cost then to live in the Isle of Man was a great

temptation to retired army and naval officers, and Castletown was full

of these interesting gentry. They gave to the place an air of

refinement, which was still further increased by the professors and

students of King William's College. I saw this college burned to the

ground on the second of January, A.D. 1844, and I remember well that I

had no wrap on, and the night was so warm I did not miss it. Yet

January is the coldest month in the mild Manx winter.

We went to Castletown in the autumn, and the following spring two

events happened affecting our household. My mother had another

daughter, whom Father christened Alethia Mona. Alethia being, with

Jane or Joan, and Isabel, the three prominent names of the Huddleston

women, just as William, John, Thomas, and Henry are the family names

of the men. Mona was added, because it was the ancient name of the

island of her birth.

Soon after this event Ann Oddy left us. I am rather ashamed to say

that we were all privately very glad. She had become a kind of

household tyrant, whom we had to constantly conciliate, and we had

long ago discovered that the old family servant was just as serious a

problem as the modern monthly one. Our emancipation from Ann's rule

came very unexpectedly. She entered the parlor one afternoon, with a

letter in her hand, and, with great excitement, said: "Mrs.

Huddleston, I am sorry, but I must go back to England at once."

Mother told her she was not out of England, and asked why she must go

in such a hurry, and Ann answered:

"You see, ma'am, Adam Bradley wants me. We were to have been wed ten

years ago, but one night Adam he walked home from chapel with Sarah

Sykes, and I had words with him about Sarah, so he married Sarah to

spite me. But she's dead now, and Adam wants me. I think it is best to

go to him, Mrs. Huddleston."

So Ann went. We hardly said to each other how glad we were, and we all

pressed any gift we could spare on her. Mother even gave her one of

her silk gowns, which I am pretty sure she missed a little later. But,

until we knew Ann was safely away in the Douglas coach, we did not

talk about her; then I shall never forget Mother's smile, and sigh of

relief, and Jane's neatly expressed opinion, that "the Irish Sea was

always rough with the wind in the present direction." Jane had never

liked Ann; and she knew Ann was both sick and terrified, when at the

mercy of wind and waves. A middle-aged Manx woman was easily found to

take Ann's place, and Jane, who was now well grown and womanly, took

charge of many things relating to the household.

It was about this time I began to seriously try to write. I commenced

a tragedy which I called "Seneca." I do not remember anything about

the work, except that it was laid in ancient Rome, and that Seneca was

a philosopher and a senator. I showed the first act to Father, and he

gave it back to me with a smile, and the opinion that "it might have

been worse." I used to take pencil and paper and go out to Scarlet

Stack, and there alone, with the sun and the wind and the sea and the

sky, try to reconstruct the men and women and life of ancient Rome.

It was a presumptuous effort, but perhaps the gain to myself was in

the effort; for I had become very ambitious. I had abandoned the

missionary idea, and longed to write books, and to travel and to see

the great cities and the strange peoples I had read about.

We had fully expected to remain at Castletown for three years, but, at

the end of the second year, my Father was removed to the Whitehaven

Circuit. I shall never forget the morning the news came to us. Mother

was making sandwiches for Father, John and I were going to row as far

as Ballasalla, then land, and go to the Silverburn River for trout.

But Father was so shocked, he put off the trip. I wondered that he

should do so, and said:

"Whitehaven is your birthplace, Father; it will surely please you to

go there."

"I would rather go to the most desolate spot on the earth," he

answered with a passion that silenced me.

"It is a much larger circuit, William," said Mother, "and your income

will be larger, and you will have an assistant--a very popular young

man, your letter says."

"I have heard of him, Mary. Popular young men are not always nice

young men. He is a nephew of Sir William Morley, and his name is

William Morley Punshon."

Then I took an instant dislike to the popular young man called

Punshon. "Such a name!" I ejaculated.

That afternoon Father called Mother in a strange, thick voice of

alarm, and she found him looking ill and terrified. "I have had a

singular sensation all down my right side, Mary," he said. "It

frightens me." And my brave little mother said, "Nonsense, William! As

we grow old, we have such sensations. I have them myself now and then;

my father had them often. Come down and talk with me and the girls,"

and she laughed softly and took his arm. But I am sure she knew that

this "sensation" was the first touch of a hand that would finally

prevail.

As for me, I threw off the thought of trouble by a conscious effort,

just as I would throw off my clothes; for I was yet an easy-hearted

child, who could say to sorrow, "Let it go."

All the Days of My Life: An Autobiography The Red Leaves of a Human Heart · 第 4 / 26 章