CHAPTER XX

The firing had ceased; the boat began to glide forwards once more. But

Mr. Heard's eye remained fixed upon the ill-omened black rock. The

sun's rays had already licked dry the moisture on its surface; it shone

with a steady dull glow. Some malefic force seemed to dwell here. Some

demon haunted the place, peering out of the crevices or rising up from

the turquoise-tinted water at its foot. The suicides' rock!

That vague sense of apprehension, of impending disaster, once more

invaded him. Suddenly it revealed itself in definite terms. A ghastly

notion flitted through his mind.

"You think it possible that Denis--?" he began.

His friend seemed to have lost all interest in that subject. It was a

way he had.

"Denis? I really could not tell. I'm not sufficiently in his

confidence.... Honour thy father and thy mother," he proceeded,

reverting to his former theme. "What think you, Heard, of this old

injunction? Is it not altogether obsolete? Was it not written for quite

other conditions? Honour thy father and mother. Why? The State educates

children, feeds them, investigates and cures their complaints, washes

and weighs them, reports on their teeth and stomachs, prescribes when

they may begin to smoke and enter public-houses: where does parental

authority come in? The State provides old folks with refuges and

pensions: how about the former obligations of children? Child and

parent alike now thank the community for what they once received from

each other. And the geographical elements that went to the making of a

home are also dispersed. Rich and poor roam like gipsies from one

country to another, from one flat into the next; the patriarchal board

is replaced by clubs and grill-rooms and fried-fish shops. Many a man

who thinks to found a home discovers that he has merely opened a tavern

for his friends. Note, too, that the family has outgrown its

ecclesiastical sanction; the oil of supernaturalism which once greased

the wheels has run dry; the machinery is creaking. Industrial

conditions have killed the old home. REQUIESCAT! Honour thy father and

mother. Industrialism has killed that commandment. Thou shalt not

steal. Consider this injunction, Heard, and ask yourself whether

industrialism does not split its sides with laughing at it. If we are

to galvanize that old collection of laws into some semblance of life,

every one f them must be re-written and brought up to date. They are

inappropriate for modern life; their interest is purely historical. We

want new values. We are no longer nomads. Industrialism has killed the

pastoral and the agricultural points of view. And how the modern Jews

smile at our infatuation for those queer doctrines and legends which

they themselves have long ago outgrown. Apropos, what has become of

Marten?"

"Left the island, I hear."

"Quick work. Now I wonder why?"

Everybody wondered at Marten's precipitate departure. Even Angelina

wondered.

She just wondered.

Had he known that she wondered, he might have been tempted to prolong

his stay. But Marten was too young to be a practical psychologist. He

had lived for half a day in terror of what he called "the inevitable

reaction," unaware of the fact that certain people do not suffer from

reactions and too engrossed in mineralogy to have learnt, from a study

of other sciences, that Angelina was one of them. She had passed that

stage, with Homeric laughter, long before his appearance on Nepenthe.

She just wondered, nowadays.

Scared, as though the avenging Furies were at his heels, he quitted the

scene of his nocturnal romance, leaving half his geological projects

incomplete. Had he taken the amiable Don Francesco into his confidence

he might have heard something to his advantage. But the scientist could

not endure the sight of a Christian priest. Like other intolerant folk

he was now paying for his prejudices.

"An erotic little beast," Keith went on. "And a typical Hebrew--a

scoffer. Have you noticed what a disruptive and irreverential brood

they are? They move up and down society like some provocative fluid,

insensible to our ideals; they take a diabolical pleasure in shattering

our old-established conceptions of right and wrong. I confess I like

them for that; they need shattering, some of those conceptions. And

they have their weaknesses too, their Achilles heel--music, for

instance, or chess. When next you are in town don't forget to go to

that little chess club of theirs over Aldgate East station. It is

better than a play to watch their faces. And with all this materialism

they have a mysterious feminine leaven of enthusiasm and unworldliness.

What pecuniary advantage could Marten expect to gain from his

minerals?"

"A professorship."

"Why, possibly. He had the professorial temperament; there was not much

poetry in his composition. If you were to ask him, 'What are those

wonderful rocks over there, shaped like some Titanic organ and glowing

with a kind of violet flame?' he would say, 'Organ be blowed. It's

columnar lithoidite.' I learnt a little from him, but not enough. I

wish we had him here. He could have told us something."

And Mr. Keith, ever avid of fresh things, regretted his lost

opportunities. He was in one of this acquisitive, Corsair moods. He

said:

"I could take geology by the throat just now. It's disgusting, not to

know things!"

His companion, meanwhile, beheld the panorama in all its nightmarish

splendour, as it drifted past him. He saw the bluffs of feathery

pumice, the lava precipices--frozen cataracts of white, black, blood

red, pale grey and sombre brown, smeared over with a vitreous enamel of

obsidian or pierced by oily, writhing dykes that blazed with metallic

scintillations. Anon came some yawning cleft or an assemblage of dizzy

rock-needles, fused into whimsical tints and attitudes, spiky,

distorted, over-toppling; then a bold tufa rampart, immaculate in its

beauty, stainless as a curtain of silk. And as the boat moved on he

looked into horrid dells which the rains had torn out of the loose

scoriae. Gaping wounds, they wore the bright hues of corruption. Their

flanks were blotched with a livid nitrous efflorescence, with flaring

sulphur, unhealthy verdure of pitchstone, streaks of arsenical

vermilion; their beds--a frantic maze of boulders.

He beheld this crazy stratification, this chaos of incandescent nature,

sent in a flame of deep blue sky and sea. It lay there calmly, like

some phantasmagoric flower, some monstrous rose that swoons away, with

upturned face, in a solar caress.

He saw it with the eye. His mind was elsewhere. He was trying, in

honest and relentless fashion, to discover himself. What if his human

values were really wrong?

Thomas, the doubting apostle....

Africa had made him think; had made him more silent and reflective than

ever. And now this sudden strange stimulus of Nepenthe--it was driving

his thoughts headlong, out of their old grooves.

Here was Keith, a man of altogether different stamp, drawing

conclusions which he dared not formulate for himself. How far were they

applicable, those old Hebrew precepts, to modern conditions? Were they

still availing as guides to conduct?

"You are a candid person, Keith, and I think I am. I sincerely try to

be. Will you tell me what you think? You seem to have a quarrel with

Moses and his commandments, which we are taught to regard as the

keystone of ethics. I don't want to discuss things. I want to listen to

the opinions of a man so different from myself as you are. It may do me

good. And I think I could stand almost anything," he added, with a

laugh, "in this landscape--in this clear pagan light, as you call it."

"I used to be interested in such things as a boy. I suppose all

respectable boys are; and I was respectable even at that tender age.

Nowadays, though I still pick up an Oriental rug now and then, I have

no further use for Oriental gods."

"What is your objection to them?"

Mr. Keith paused before replying. Then he said:

"The drawback of Oriental gods is that they have been manufactures by

the proletariat for the use of the aristocracy. They act accordingly;

that is, they distil the morality of their creators which I consider a

noxious emanation. The classic gods were different. They were invented

by intellectualists who felt themselves capable of maintaining a kind

of comradeship with their deities. Men and gods were practically on a

level. They walked hand in hand over the earth. These gods belonged to

what one might call the horizontal or downstairs variety."

"And those others?"

"Oh, they are the upstairs or vertical type. They live overhead. Why

overhead? Because they have been created by the proletariat. The

proletariat loves to humiliate itself. Therefore they manufacture a god

who approves of grovelling, a god who can look down upon them. They

exalt this deity to an infinite degree in point of goodness and

distance, and in so doing they inevitably abase themselves. Now I

disapprove of grovelling. That means I disapprove of upstairs gods."

"Upstairs gods--"

"If you walk into my front door as a distinguished visitor I am happy

to show you the place. You can prowl about the garden, poke your nose

into the pantry and learn, if it amuses you, all about my private life.

But if you rent a high attic overlooking my premises and stair out of

your window all day long, watching my movements and noting down

everything I do, why, damn it, I call that vulgar. Staring is bad form.

Vertical gods are inquisitive. I don't like to be supervised. I don't

care about this DOSSIER business. My garden is for you and me to walk

about in, not for outsiders to stare into. Which reminds me that you

have not been to see me lately. You ought to come and look at my

cannas; you really ought! They are in magnificent bloom just now. When

shall it be?"

Mr. Keith seemed to be already tired of the subject. In fact he was as

near being bored as ever he allowed himself to be. But the other

refused to let the conversation be side-tracked. He wanted to know.

"Vertical and horizontal gods.... Dear me. Sounds rather profane."

"I have not heard that word for quite a long time."

"You don't feel the need of any kind of superior being to control human

affairs?"

"Not up to the present. I can find no room in my Cosmos for a deity,

save as a waste product of human weakness, an excrement of the

imagination. If you gave me the sauciest god that ever sat on a cloud

or breakfasted with the Village Idiot--'pon my word, I shouldn't know

what to do with him. I don't collect bric-a-brac myself, and the

British Museum is dreadfully overstocked. Perhaps the Duchess could

make some use of him, if he specialized in lace vestments and choral

mass. By the way, I hear that she is going to be admitted into the

Roman Church next week; there is to be a luncheon after the ceremony.

Are you going?"

"Vertical and horizontal gods.... I never heard that distinction

made before."

"It is a difference, my dear Heard. Mankind remains in direct contact

with the downstairs variety. That simplifies matters. But the peculiar

position of those others--perpendicularly overhead at a vast

distance--necessitates a troublesome code of verbal signals,

unintelligible to common folk, for the expression of mutual desires.

You cannot have any god of this kind without some such cumbrous

contrivance to bridge over the gulf and make communication possible. It

is called theology. It complicates life very considerably. Yes," he

pursued, "the vertical-god system is not only vulgar; it is perplexing

and expensive. Think of the wastage, of the myriads of people who have

been sacrificed because they misinterpreted some enigmatical word in

the code. Why are you intent on these conundrums?"

"Well, partly at least, it's quite a practical matter. You know that

American millionaire, van Koppen, and the scandal attached to his

peculiar habits? It made me wonder, only yesterday--"

But at this juncture the tiresome old boatman lifted up his voice once

more.

"See that high cliff, gentlemens? Funny thing happen there, very funny.

Dam-fool foreigner here, he collect flowers. Always collecting flowers

on bad rocks; sometimes with rope round him, for fear of falling; with

rope, ha, ha, ha! Nasty man. And poor. No money at all. He always say,

'All Italians liars, and liars where go? To Hell, sure. That's where

liars go. That's where Italians go.' Now rich man he say liar to poor

man. But poor man, he better not say liar to rich man. That so,

gentlemens. One day he say liar to nice old Italian. Nice old man

think: 'Ah, you wait, putrid puppy of bastard pig, you wait.' Nice old

man got plenty good lot vineyards back of cliff there. One day he walk

to see grapes. Then he look to end of cliff and see rope hanging. Very

funny, he think. Then he look to end of rope and see nasty-man hanging.

That so, gentlemens. Nasty-man hanging in air. Can't get up. 'Pull me

up,' says he. Nice old man, he laugh--ha, ha, ha! laugh till his belly

hurt. Then he pull out knife and begin to cut rope. 'See knife?' he

shout down. 'How much to pull up?' Five hundred dollar! 'How much?'

Five thousand! 'How much?' Fifty thousand! Nice old man say quite

quiet: 'You no got fifty thousand in the world, you liar. Liars where

go? To Hell, sure. That's where liars go. That's where you go, Mister.

To Hell.' And he cut rope. Down he go, patatrac! round and round in

air, like firework wheel, on to first rock--pa-pa-pa-paff! Six hundred

feets. After that he arrive, all messy, in water. That so, gentlemens.

Gone where to? Swim to Philadelphia? I don't think! Him drownded, sure.

Ha, ha, ha! Nice old man, when he come home that morning, he laugh. He

laugh. He just laugh. He laugh first quiet, then loud. He laugh all the

time, and soon family too. He laugh for ten days, till he nearly die.

Got well again, and live plenty good years after. In Paradise to-day,

God rest his soul! And never found out, no never. Fine judge on

Nepenthe. Always fine judge here. He know everything, and he know

nothing. Understand? All nice people here. That so, gentlemens."

He told the tale with Satanic gusto, rocking himself to and fro as

though convulsed with some secret joy. Then, after expectorating

violently, he resumed the oars which had been dropped in the heat of

gesticulation.

The bishop was pensive. There was something wrong with this

story--something fundamentally wrong. He turned to Keith:

"That man must be a liar too. If, as he says, the thing was never found

out, how can he have learnt all about it?"

"Hush, my dear fellow. He thinks I don't know, but I do. It was his own

father to whom the adventure occurred."

"The adventure?" said Mr. Heard.

"The adventure. Surely you are not going to make a tragedy of it? If

you cannot see the joke of that story, you must be hard to please. I

nearly died of laughing when I first heard it."

"What would you have done?"

"If I had been the botanist? I would not have made myself disagreeable

to the natives. Also, I would not have got myself into a tangle with

that rope."

"You think he ought to have cut it?"

"What else could the poor fellow do? It strikes me, Heard, you attach

some inordinate importance to human life."

"It's all rather complex," sighed the bishop.

"Now that is really interesting!"

"Interesting?"

"Why should you find it complex, when I find it simple? Let me see. Our

lives are perfectly insignificant, aren't they? We know it for a fact.

But we don't like it. We don't like being of no account. We want some

thing to make us feel more valuable than we are. Consequently we invent

a fiction to explain away that insignificance--the fiction of a

personality overhead everlastingly occupied in watching every single

one of us, and keenly engrossed in our welfare. If this were the case,

we would cease to be insignificant, and we might try to oblige him by

not killing each other. It happens to be a fiction. Get rid of the

fiction, and your feeling of complexity evaporates. I perceive you are

in an introspective mood. Worrying about some pastoral epistle?"

"Worry about my values, as you would say. Up to the present, Keith, I

don't seem to have had time to think; I had to act; there was always

something urgent to be taken in hand. Now that I am really lazy for the

first time, and in this stimulating environment, certain problems of

life keep cropping up. Minor problems, of course; for it is a

consolation to know that the foundations of good conduct are immutable.

Our sense of right and wrong is firmly implanted in us. The laws of

morality, difficult as they often are to understand, have been written

down for our guidance in letters that never change."

"Never change? You might as well say, my dear Heard, that these cliffs

never change. The proof that the laws of good conduct change is this,

that if you were upright after the fashion of your great-grandfather

you would soon find yourself in the clutches of the law for branding a

slave, or putting a bullet through someone in a duel. I grant that

morality changes slowly. It changes slowly because the proletariat,

whose product it is, does the same. There is not much difference, I

imagine, between the crowds of old Babylon and new Shoreditch; hence

their peculiar emanations resemble each other more or less. That is why

morality compares so unfavourably with intellectuality, which is the

product of the upper sections of society and flashes out new lights

every moment. But even morality changes. The Spartans, a highly moral

people, thought it positively indecent not to steal. A modern vice,

such as mendacity, was accounted a virtue by the greatest nation of

antiquity. A modern virtue, like that of forgiving one's enemies, was

accounted a vice proper to slaves. Drunkenness, reprobated by ancients

and moderns alike, became the mark of a gentlemen in intermediate

periods."

"I see what you are driving at. You wish me to think that this

fictitious value, as you would call it--this halo of sanctity--with which

we now invest a human life, may be blown away at any moment. Possibly

you are right. Perhaps we English do exaggerate its importance. They

don't take much account of life in my part of Africa."

"And then, I disagree with what you say about the difficulty of

understanding the laws of morality. Any child can grasp the morality of

its period. Why should I pretend to be interested in what a child can

grasp? If is a positive strain to keep one's mind at that low level.

Why should I impose this strain upon myself? When a group-up man shows

an unfeigned interest in such questions I regard him as a case of

arrested development. All morality is a generalization, and all

generalizations are tedious. Why should I plague myself with what is

tedious? Altogether the question that confronts me is not whether

morality is worth talking about, but whether it's worth laughing at.

Sometimes I think it is. It reminds me of those old pantomime jokes

that make one quite sad, at first, with their heart-breaking vulgarity;

those jokes, you know, that have to be well rubbed in before we begin

to see how really funny they are. And, by Jove, they do rub this one

in, don't they? You must talk to Don Francesco about these things. You

will find him sound, though he does not push his conclusions as far as

I do--not in public, at least. Or to Count Caloveglia. He is a

remarkable Latin, that old man. Why don't you drive up one day and have

a look at his Locri Faun? Street, the South Kensington man, thinks very

highly of it."

"I would like to listen to you just now. I am listening, and thinking.

Please go on. I'll preach you my sermon some other day."

"Will you? I wonder! I don't believe, Heard, that you will preach

another sermon in your life. I don't think you will ever go back to

Africa, or to any other episcopal work. I think you have reached a

turning point."

The bishop was thoughtful for a moment. Those words went home. Then he

said lightly:

"You are in better vein than you were a short while ago."

"That story of the botanist has revived me. He tells it rather well,

doesn't he? It is good to inhabit a world where such things can still

happen. I feel as if life were worth living. I feel as if I could

discuss anything. What were you going to say about the American

millionaire?"

"Ah yes," replied Mr. Heard. "I wondered, supposing these reports about

the ladies are true, how far you and I, for example, should condone his

vices."

"Vices. My dear bishop! Under a sky like this. Have a good look at it;

do."

Mr. Heard, barely conscious of what he was doing, obeyed the counsel.

Raising his hand, he pushed the silken awning to one side. Then he

peered skyward, into the noonday zenith; into an ocean of blue,

immeasurable. There was no end to this azure liquid. Gazing thus, his

intelligence became aware of the fact that there are skies of different

kinds. This one was not quite like his native firmament. Here was no

suggestion of a level space overhead, remote, but still conceivable--a

space whereon some god might have sat enthroned, note-book in hand,

jotting down men's virtues, and vices, and what not. A sky of this kind

was obviously not built to accommodate deities in a sitting posture.

Instead of commenting on this simple observation he remarked:

"I mean, whether one should publicly approve of van Koppen's ladies,

supposing they exist."

"Why should I approve or disapprove? Old Koppen's activities do not

impinge on mine. Like a sensible fellow he cultivates a hobby. He

indulges himself. Why interfere? Tell me, why should I disapprove of

things?"

"Look here, Keith! Not long ago you were disapproving of vertical

gods."

"That is different. They do impinge on my activities."

"Are the peculiar hobbies of their votaries distasteful to you?"

"Not at all. Their hobbies do not clash with mine. To feel righteous,

or to feel sinful, is quite an innocent form of self-indulgence--"

"Innocent self-indulgence? Dear me! You seem to be taking morality by

the throat for a change. Is that your conception of sin? How should

Moses have come to inscribe some particular form of wrong-doing into

his Code, if it had not proved harmful to the community at large?"

His friend paused before replying. He took out another cigar, bit off

its end, and lighted it. Then he sent a few fragrant whiffs over the

sea. At last he said:

"Moses! I have a clear portrait of Moses in my mind; a clear and

favourable portrait. I imagine him gentle, wise, and tolerant. Picture

to yourself such a man. He is drawing up a preliminary list of the more

noteworthy forms of misconduct, with a view to submitting it for Divine

approval, to be welded later into the so-called Ten Commandments. He is

still puzzling, you perceive, which sins ought to be included and which

left out. Now that particular offence of which our millionaire is

accused happens to have been left out of consideration so far."

"Why has it been left out?" enquired the bishop.

"Nomadic habits. And besides--Moses, don't forget, is a kindly old

fellow, who likes people to have as much harmless amusement as

possible; he is not always sniffing about to discover evil. But Aaron,

or some other old family friend of his, thinks differently. He is a

person such as we all know--a sour-faced puritan who has lost the vigour

which people, rightly or wrongly, attribute to van Koppen. This man

forgets what he used to do in his own youthful days; he comes up to

Moses, professing to be horrified at this particular offence. 'These

young people,' he says, 'the way they go on! It's a sin, that's what it

is. And you, Moses, I'm ashamed of you. This sort of thing ought to be

stopped. It ought to be publicly reprimanded in those blessed Tables of

yours.' 'A sin?' says gentle Moses. 'You surprise me, Aaron. I confess

it never struck me in that light before. But I think I see your point.

We have a conference to-night on the Holy Mountain; I may be able to

get a clause inserted--' 'Do, there's a good fellow,' says the other.

'But aren't you a little hard on the youngsters?' asks Moses. 'You

wouldn't believe it, but I was a boy myself once and I should have got

into a lot of rows if such an enactment had been in existence then.

Moreover (and here his eyes assume a rapt, prophetic look) I seem to

see, rising out of the distant future, a personage of royal line,

beloved of God--one David who, if your proposal were to come into force,

would be classed as a pretty hot sinner,' 'Oh, bother David! Look here,

I'm not asking for a loan of money, old man. Just see to it that my New

Sin is inscribed on the Tables. Hang it all! What's that, to a man of

your influence up there? You can't think how it annoys me nowadays to

see all these young people--all these young people--need I go into

particulars?' 'You needn't. I'm not altogether a fool,' says gentle

Moses. 'And I'll see what I can do to oblige you, if only for the sake

of your dear mother.'"

The bishop, at the end of this narration, could not help smiling.

"That," continued Keith, "is how Moses gets talked over by the

Pharisees. That is how sins are manufactured and classified. And from

that preposterous old Hebrew system of right and wrong they jump

straight into our English penal code. And there they sit tight," he

added.

"Is that your quarrel with what you call the upstairs god system?"

"Precisely! It affects me by its unsanitary tendency to multiply sins;

that is to say, when it transforms those sins into legal crimes. How

would you like to be haled before a Court of law for some ridiculous

trifle, which became a crime only because it used to be a sin, and

became a sin only because some dyspeptic old antediluvian was envious

of his neighbour's pleasure? Our statute-book reeks of discarded

theories of conduct; the serpent's trail of the theologian, of the

reactionary, is over all."

"It never struck me in that light before," said Mr. Heard.

"No? Our reverence for inspired idiots: has it never struck you? Don't

you realize that we are still in the stage of that ENFANT TERRIBLE of

Christianity, Paul of Tarsus, and his gift of tongues? In the stage of

these Russians here, with their decayed Messiah? What do you think of

them?"

"I must say they look pretty, all bathing together. Rather improper.

But decidedly apostolic. You know I am not easily shocked in such

matters. When you have lived in Africa among the M'tezo! Lovely

fellows. I assure you they could give points to anyone on this island.

And your friends the Bulanga! To think that I once baptized three

hundred of them in one day. And the very next week they ate up old Mrs.

Richardson, our best lady preacher. The poor dear! We buried her riding

boots, I remember. There was nothing else to bury.... It's getting

warm, isn't it? Makes one feel sleepy."

"Sleepy? I don't agree with you at all. That Russian sect, Heard, had

between two and three million followers out there. But I fancy our

little contingent will not be on this island much longer. The judge

tells me that he means to make short work of them when he gets a

chance. If the Militia have really been called out, I should not be

surprised to learn that the Messiah has been up to some new

tomfoolery."

"Really? H'm. The Militia.... I find it very warm all of a sudden."

Mr. Heard had listened enough for the time being. Now he leaned back

and rested.

But Keith was wide awake.

"You are a disappointing person, Mr. Heard. First you inveigle me into

a religious discussion and then, when I begin to wake up, you go to

sleep."

"I didn't want to argue, my dear fellow. It's too hot to argue. I

wanted to hear your opinion."

"My opinion? Listen, Heard. All mankind is at the mercy of a handful of

neurotics. Neurotics and their catchwords. Catchwords like duty,

charity, purity, sobriety. Sobriety! In order that Miss Wilberforce may

not come home drunk--listen, Heard!--all we other lunatics forgo the

pleasure of a pint of beer after ten o'clock. How we love tormenting

ourselves! Listen, Heard. I'll tell you what it is. We are ripe for a

new Messiah, like these Russians. We are not Europeans. We are Indian

fakirs, self-torturers. We are a pack of masochists. That is what

upstairs gods have done for us. Listen, Heard!"

The bishop failed to catch the import of this peroration. Its sound

alone reached him like an echo from far away. He was unaccountably

drowsy.

"Fakirs. I quite understand--"

The boat seemed to move more slowly than before. Perhaps the oarsmen

were weary, or suffering from the heat. The glare pierced the awning.

Mr. Heard, as he reclined about his cushions, felt the perspiration

gathering on his forehead. A spell had fallen upon him--the spell of a

Southern noon. It lulled his senses. It laid chains upon his thoughts.

There was a long silence, broken only by the splash of the oars and by

a steady flow of conversation on the part of the two Greek genii, who

seemed impervious to the midday beams and entirely absorbed in one

another. Mr. Heard opened his drooping eyelids from time to time to

take pleasure in their merry play of feature, wondering dreamily what

could be the subject-matter of this endless polite conversation.

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