And thou, my Whiskerandos, shouldst be father
And mother, brother, cousin, uncle, aunt,
And friend to me!
P. 228. _Blue Bonnets over the Border._ Scott's 'ditty to the ancient
air of "Blue Bonnets over the Border,"' _The Monastery_, chap. xxv:
March, march, Ettrick and Teviotdale,
Why the deil dinna ye march forward in order?
P. 231. _As Spencer had ere he composed his Tales._ This probably
refers to the Hon. W. R. Spencer, author of _Beth Gelert_, as well as
to the one-time fashionable tailless coat known as a 'spencer.'
P. 232. _This shall a Carder... Whiteboy... Rock's murderous
commands._ The reference is to the secret associations which were
responsible for much agrarian crime in Ireland during the early part of
the nineteenth century.
P. 235. _If English corn should grow abroad._. Thus in fourth edition
of _Whims and Oddities_ (1829), but 'go' in some reprints. The bull is
probably intentional.
P. 237. _Huggins and Duggins._ Hood appears to have had Pope's first
Pastoral, _Spring_, especially in mind. In it Strephon and Daphnis
alternately sing the praises of Delia and Sylvia:
In Spring the fields, in Autumn hills I love,
At morn the plains, at noon the shady grove,
But Delia always; absent from her sight,
Nor plains at morn, nor grove at noon delight.
P. 237. _All things by turns, and nothing long._ 'Was everything by
starts, and nothing long.'--DRYDEN: _Absalom and Achitophel_.
P. 240. _We met._ T. H. Bayly's--
We met--'twas in a crowd,
And I thought he would shun me,
He came--I could not breathe,
For his eyes were upon me.
P. 241. _Those Evening Bells._ Moore's song begins:
Those evening bells! those evening bells!
How many a tale their music tells
Of youth, and home, and that sweet time
When last I heard their soothing chime.
P. 241. _The Water Peri's Song._ Moore's _Lalla Rookh_;
Farewell--farewell to thee, Araby's daughter!
(Thus warbled a Peri beneath the dark sea,)
No pearl ever lay, under Oman's green water,
More pure in its shell than thy Spirit in thee.
P. 242. _Cabbages._ The first verse of _Violets_, by L. E. L., runs:
Violets! deep blue violets!
April's loveliest coronets:
There are no flowers grow in the vale,
Kissed by the sun, wooed by the gale,
None with the dew of the twilight wet,
So sweet as the deep blue violet.
P. 243. _Larry O'Toole._ Charles Lever: 'Did ye hear of the Widow
Malone?'
P. 243. _The Willow Tree._ In this Thackeray was parodying his own
earlier treatment of the same theme, as Charles Lamb had parodied
himself in the _Nonsense Verses_ (see p. 154). Thackeray's serious
version begins:
Know ye the willow-tree,
Whose grey leaves quiver,
Whispering gloomily
To yon pale river?
P. 245. _Dear Jack._ In O'Keeffe's opera, _The Poor Soldier_, is the
often-parodied song imitated from the Latin:
Dear Tom, this brown jug that foams with mild ale,
Out of which I now drink to sweet Nan of the Vale,
Was once Toby Filpot, etc.
The Rev. Francis Fawkes, famous in his day as a translator of the
classics, is the reputed author of the song.
P. 248. _The Almack's Adieu_ and _The Knightly Guerdon_. These are
varied parodies of a one-time popular song:
Your Molly has never been false, she declares,
Since the last time we parted at Wapping Old Stairs;
When I vowed I would ever continue the same,
And gave you the 'Bacco Box marked with my name.
When I passed a whole fortnight between decks with you,
Did I e'er give a kiss, Tom, to one of the crew?
To be useful and kind with my Thomas I stayed,--
For his trousers I washed, and his grog, too, I made.
P. 250. W. E. _Aytoun._ The contributions of Aytoun to the _Book of
Ballads_, edited by 'Bon Gaultier,' that are here given are those
which, on the authority of Sir Theodore Martin, were solely his own
composition. Several of the _Ballads_ had appeared in periodicals
before they were collected and published in book form in 1845.
P. 252. _A Midnight Meditation._ Six poets are parodied in the 'Bon
Gaultier' _Ballads_ under the general heading, 'The Laureates'
Tourney'--Wordsworth, the Hon. T-- B-- M'A--, the Hon. G-- S-- S--,
T-- M--RE, Esq., A-- T--, and Sir E-- B-- L--, the last of which, by
Aytoun only, is here given. The parodists, remembering _Rejected
Addresses_, profess that the poems were sent to the Home Secretary when
the Laureateship became vacant on the death of Southey.
P. 252. _These mute inglorious Miltons._ Hood had already used this pun
connecting the poet and the oysters in his ballad of the blind _Tim
Turpin_:
A surgeon oped his Milton eyes.
Like oysters, with a knife.
P. 254. _The Husband's Petition._ In this Aytoun was using to a
ludicrous end the measure he had employed in _The Execution of
Montrose_:
Come hither, Evan Cameron!
Come, stand beside my knee--
I hear the river roaring down
Towards the wintry sea.
P. 256. _Sonnet CCCI._ Martin Farquhar Tupper published a volume
of _Three Hundred Sonnets_ in 1860. _Punch_ professed to have made
an arrangement with him to continue the series, and boldly put the
initials M. F. T. to this parody in the number for May 26, 1860.
P. 257. _You see yon prater called a Beales._ Edmond Beales (1803-1881)
was President of the Reform League at the time of the Hyde Park riots.
He thus figures in _Punch_ in lines written apropos of tears shed by
Walpole, Home Secretary, when he learnt of the riots:
Tears at the thought of that Hyde Park affair
Rise in the eye and trickle down the nose,
In looking on the haughty Edmond Beales,
And thinking of the shrubs that are no more.
P. 258. _The Lay of the Lovelorn._ This is one of the 'Bon Gaultier'
_Ballads_, and is included by permission of Messrs. William Blackwood
and Sons. Aytoun had no part in this parody. It was solely Sir Theodore
Martin's, and in its author's opinion is the best he contributed to
the collection. In the _Book of Ballads_ Sir Theodore was at pains to
explain that--
it was precisely the poets whom we most admired that we
imitated the most frequently. This was certainly not from
any want of reverence, but rather out of the fullness of
our admiration, just as the excess of a lover's fondness
often runs over into raillery of the very qualities that are
dearest to his heart. 'Let no one,' says Heine, 'ridicule
mankind unless he loves them.' With no less truth may it be
said, Let no one parody a poet unless he loves him. He must
first be penetrated by his spirit, and have steeped his ear in
the music of his verse, before he can reflect these under a
humorous aspect with success.
Some excellent parodists have succeeded very well in dissembling their
love.
P. 266. _The Laureates Bust at Trinity._ Parody of part of _Guinevere_
in the _Idylls of the King_:
So the stately Queen abode
For many a week, unknown, among the nuns....
'Late, late, so late! and dark the night and chill!
Late, late, so late! but we can enter still.
Too late, too late! ye cannot enter now.'
The parody is from _Punch_, November 12, 1859.
P. 268. _Unfortunate Miss Bailey._ Tennyson's _The Lord of Burleigh_.
In her ear he whispers gaily,
'If my heart by signs can tell,
Maiden, I have watched thee daily,
And I think thou lov'st me well.'
P. 270. _Cary._ Phoebe Cary wrote many parodies. One entitled _The
Wife_ is sometimes said to be a burlesque of Wordsworth:
Her washing ended with the day,
Yet lived she at its close,
And passed the long, long night away
In darning ragged hose.
But when the sun in all his state
Illumed the eastern skies,
She passed about the kitchen grate
And went to making pies.
As a matter of fact this only differs by the use of a few turns from
Her suffering ended with the day,
by James Aldrich (1810-1856).
P. 271. _That very time I saw_, etc. See _Midsummer Night's Dream_, Act
II., Sc. 1.
P. 272. _On a Toasted Muffin_, Sir E. L. B. L. B. L. B. Little was
Edward Lytton Bulwer Lytton, afterwards Lord Lytton, who had written an
anonymous satire, _The New Timon_.
P. 273. _In Immemoriam._ In connexion with these quatrains it may be
noted that Whewell (1794-1866), in one of his treatises, published
before _In Memoriam_, dropped into the following sentence: 'No power
on earth, however great, can stretch a cord, however fine, into a
horizontal line that shall be absolutely straight.'
P. 274. _Bayard Taylor. The Diversions of the Echo Club_ first
appeared in the _Atlantic Monthly_, 1872, and in book form in 1876. The
poems here reprinted are given by permission of the Houghton, Mifflin
Company.
Taylor, writing to T. B. Aldrich, March 29, 1873, says:
Story told me that Browning sent him the _Echo Club_ last
summer, with a note saying it was the best thing of the kind
he had ever seen, and that if he had found the imitations of
himself in a volume of his poems he would have believed that
he actually wrote them.
_Life and Letters of Bayard Taylor._
P. 281. _All or Nothing._ While parodying Emerson's poetry generally
Bayard Taylor had probably chiefly in mind _The Sphinx_:
The Sphinx is drowsy,
Her wings are furled:
Her ear is heavy,
She broods on the world.
Most of Bayard Taylor's parodies are obviously rather of the poets'
general styles than of particular poems.
P. 286. _If life were never bitter._ Parody of Swinburne's _A Match_:
If love were what the rose is
And I were like the leaf.
P. 286. _Salad._ From _The British Birds_ (1872):
Enter three Poets, all handsome. One hath redundant hair, a second
redundant beard, a third redundant brow. They present a letter of
introduction from an eminent London publisher, stating that they
are candidates for the important post of Poet Laureate to the New
Municipality which the Birds are about to create.
P. 289. _I'm a Shrimp._
I'm afloat! I'm afloat! On the fierce rolling tide--
The ocean's my home and my bark is my bride.
Up, up, with my flag, let it wave o'er the sea,--
I'm afloat! I'm afloat! and the Rover is free.
P. 290. _Dante Rossetti._ These poems are taken, by permission, from
_The Works of Dante Gabriel Rossetti_--the single-volume edition of
1911. 'MacCracken' is a close parody of one of Tennyson's early poems,
'The Kraken':
Below the thunders of the upper deep;
Far, far beneath in the abysmal sea,
His ancient, dreamless, uninvaded sleep
The Kraken sleepeth.
Mr. Francis MacCracken, of Belfast, was the purchaser of early works by
the pre-Raphaelite artists.
P. 290. _The Brothers._ Another poem by Tennyson, 'The Sisters,'
tells of the tragic love of twin girls for one man, and this duality
suggested the verses to Rossetti when he found that the 'Thomas
Maitland' who had attacked his work in the _Contemporary Review_ ('The
Fleshly School of Poetry') was really Robert Buchanan.
P. 292. _Ode to Tobacco._ This is in the Draytonian metre, 'Fair
stood the wind for France,' but Calverley evidently had Longfellow in
mind. Compare the second stanza of his Ode with the third stanza of
Longfellow's _Skeleton in Armour_:
I was a Viking old!
My deeds, though manifold,
No Skald in song has told,
No Saga taught thee!
P. 294. _The real beverage for feasting gods on._ The allusion in the
seventh stanza is to Jupiter and the Indian Ale:
'Bring it!' quoth the Cloud-Compeller,
And the wine-god brought the beer--
'Port and Claret are like water
To the noble stuff that's here.'
Calverley also parodied Byron in _Arcades Ambo_.
P. 297. _Wanderers._ Tennyson's 'The Brook,' with the song of the brook:
I come from haunts of coot and hern,
I make a sudden sally,
but ending in a parody of Tennysonian blank verse. In his _Collections
and Recollections_, Mr. G. W. E. Russell has quoted the last six lines,
'which even appreciative critics generally overlook.... Will any one
stake his literary reputation on the assertion that these lines are not
really Tennyson's?' (The poem is from _Fly-Leaves_, 1872, by permission
of Messrs. George Bell and Sons.)
P. 298. _Proverbial Philosophy._ Here are some typical lines by Martin
Tupper:
A man too careful of danger liveth in continual torment,
But a cheerful expecter of the best hath a fountain of joy within
him:
Yea, though the breath of disappointment should chill the sanguine
heart,
Speedily gloweth it again, warmed by the live embers of hope;
Though the black and heavy surge close above the head for a moment,
Yet the happy buoyancy of Confidence riseth superior to Despair.
P. 300. _Read incessantly thy Burke_--_i.e._, Burke's _Peerage_. _The
Prince of Modern Romance_--_i.e._, Lord Lytton.
P. 301. _The Cock and the Bull._ As Mr. Seaman truly remarks, this is a
recognized masterpiece of the higher stage of parody, when an author's
literary methods--in this case Browning's _The Ring and the Book_--are
imitated. (From _Fly-Leaves_.)
P. 304. _Lovers, and a Reflection._ Calverley may have had in mind
William Morris's 'Two Red Roses across the Moon,' which begins 'There
was a lady lived in a hall,' but undoubtedly the source of his
inspiration was Jean Ingelow's 'The Apple-Woman's Song,' from _Mopsa
the Fairy_, the second line of which recurs: 'Feathers and moss, and a
wisp of hay.' (From _Fly-Leaves_.)
P. 306. _Ballad._ Another burlesque of the same poet. Miss Ingelow
attempted to retaliate in _Fated to be Free_, with feeble lines
intended to pour scorn on 'Gifford Crayshaw'--_i.e._, Calverley. (From
_Fly-Leaves_.)
P. 309. _You are old, Father William._ An example of a parody known to
everybody, although the original is known to few. The poem imitated is
Southey's 'The Old Man's Comforts, and how he gained them,' beginning:
You are old, Father William, the young man cried,
and ending:
In the days of my youth I remember'd my God!
And He hath not forgotten my age.
P. 314. _The Three Voices._ Tennyson's _The Two Voices_:
A still small voice spake unto me.
P. 322. _Beautiful Soup._ The authorship of 'Beautiful Snow,' which was
immensely popular in this country as well as in its native America,
cannot be verified. It has been attributed to an unhappy woman, to
Major W. A. Sigourney, who was said to have written the verses in 1852,
and who died in 1871, and to a James W. Watson.
P. 323. _Ravings._ Parodying Poe's _Ulalume_:
The skies they were ashen and sober;
The leaves they were crisped and sere--
The leaves they were withering and sere;
It was night in the lonesome October
Of my most immemorial year;
It was hard by the dim lake of Auber,
In the misty mid region of Weir--
It was down by the dank tarn of Auber,
In the ghoul-haunted woodland of Weir.
P. 324. _The Wedding._ The name, 'Owing Merrythief' (_i.e._, Owen
Meredith), invented by Hood the Younger, sufficiently explains the
Tennysonian fragrance of these lines.
P. 327. _A Clerk ther was._ The seventy-fifth birthday of that
distinguished scholar and oarsman, the late Dr. F. J. Furnivall, was
celebrated by the publication by the Oxford University Press of a
Festschrift, _An English Miscellany_. Professor Skeat's contribution
was received too late for inclusion among the other tributes in this
volume, and it was first published in _The Periodical_, the organ of
the Oxford Press.
P. 330. _A Reminiscence of 'David Garrick,'_ etc. T. W. Robertson's
_David Garrick_ was produced in 1864.
P. 330. _Lord Dundreary._ A farcical stage character in Tom Taylor's
play, _Our American Cousin_, in which Edward A. Sothern created
something of a furore in 1861-62.
P. 330. _Mr. Buckstone's playhouse_--_i.e._, The Haymarket Theatre.
P. 331. _But at last a lady entered._ Nelly Moore (d. 1869), an actress
whose chief success was gained at the Haymarket with Sothern.
Pp. 336-41. From _Specimens of Modern Poets_ | _The Heptalogia_ | _or_
| _The Seven against Sense._| a _Cap with Seven Bells_: by permission
of Mr. Theodore Watts-Dunton and Messrs. Chatto and Windus. The poets
parodied are Tennyson, Robert and Mrs. Browning, Coventry Patmore,
'Owen Meredith,' D. G. Rossetti, and Swinburne himself. The _Specimens_
were published anonymously in 1880. The 'Owen Meredith' is particularly
severe, and strikes the same note as that of Hood the Younger (p. 324).
Swinburne's parody of himself is one of the rare successes of its kind.
'The Kid' Idyll is the third part of a parody of _The Angel in the
House_.
The _Poet and the Woodlouse_ is presumably suggested by _Lady
Geraldine's Courtship_.
P. 342. _Bret Harte._ The Bret Harte poems are taken from his _Complete
Works_ by permission of Messrs. Chatto and Windus and the Houghton,
Mifflin Company.
P. 342. _A Geological Madrigal._ Shenstone's verses beginning
I have found out a gift for my fair;
I have found where the wood-pigeons breed,
are in _Hope_, the second part of his _Pastoral Ballad in Four Parts_.
The inspiration of Bret Harte's verses is sometimes ridiculously
attributed to Herrick.
P. 347. _Vers de Société._ This might have been classed as a parody of
Praed, but was printed originally as by 'Fritteric Lacquer.' It is here
reprinted, with the two following parodies, from Traill's _Recaptured
Rhymes_, by permission of Messrs. Blackwood.
P. 348. _The Puss and the Boots._ This may be compared with Calverley's
'The Cock and the Bull' (see p. 301).
P. 350. _After Dilettante Concetti._ See Rossetti's _Sister Helen_,
which commences:
'Why did you melt your waxen man,
Sister Helen?
To-day is the third since you began.'
'The time was long, yet the time ran,
Little Brother!'
(_O Mother, Mary Mother,
Three days to-day, between Hell and Heaven!_)
The sonnet with which Traill closes is a parody of Sonnet XCVII. of
_The House of Life_, beginning:
'Look in my face; my name is Might-have-been;
I am also called No-More, Too-Late, Farewell.'
Pp. 353-7. _Andrew Lang._ The parodies on the Rossetti and Morris
styles are taken from Andrew Lang's essay on Thomas Haynes Bayly in
_Essays in Little_. 'Bayly,' Mr. Lang wrote, in discussing 'Oh, no, we
never mention her,' 'had now struck the note, the sweet sentimental
note, of the early, innocent, Victorian age.... We should do the trick
quite differently now, more like this.' Here follows 'Love spake to
me,' of which its author says at the end:
I declare I nearly weep over these lines; for, though they
are only Bayly's sentiment hastily recast in a modern manner,
there is something so very affecting, mouldy, and unwholesome
about them that they sound as if they had been 'written up to'
a sketch by a disciple of Mr. Rossetti's.
So, of--
Gaily the Troubadour
Touched his guitar,
Mr. Lang says, 'Any one of us could get in more local colour for the
money, and give the crusader a cithern or citole instead of a guitar,'
and in proof gives the 'romantic, esoteric, old French poem, "Sir
Ralph."'
The two Swinburne parodies are from _Rhymes à la Mode_, 1895. An
earlier _Ballade_, of which that on p. 35 'is an improved version, was
printed in the _St. James's Gazette_ in 1881. The original of this is
Swinburne's 'A Ballad of Burdens'; of 'The Palace of Bric-a-brac,' 'The
Garden of Proserpine':
Here, where the world is quiet,
Here, where all trouble seems
Dead winds' and spent waves' riot
In doubtful dreams of dreams.
P. 355. _Brahma._ Emerson's 'If the red slayer think he slays.' This
parody is said to have been an impromptu. It is taken from _New
Collected Rhymes_. All the Lang parodies here are given by permission
of Messrs. Longman.
Pp. 358-64. _A. C. Hilton._ The parodies by Hilton appeared in the two
numbers of _The Light Green_. They are reprinted here by permission of
Messrs. Metcalfe, Cambridge.
The original of 'Octopus' was clearly 'Dolores,' which appeared in
_Poems and Ballads, First Series_, 1866. The fourth stanza of this,
with which may be compared the fifth stanza of 'Octopus,' runs:
O lips full of lust and of laughter,
Curled snakes that are fed from my breast,
Bite hard lest remembrance come after
And press with new lips where you pressed.
For my heart, too, springs up at the pressure,
Mine eyelids, too, moisten and burn;
Ah, feed me and fill me with pleasure,
Ere pain come in turn.
P. 365. _Home, Sweet Home._ This Fantasia is taken from _Airs from
Arcady_, 1885, by permission of Messrs. Charles Scribner's Sons.
P. 374. _Ode on a Retrospect._ This Ode was put into the mouth of an
Eton master named Joynes. Being a Liberal with Nationalist sympathies,
he visited a disturbed district in the North of Ireland (presumably
in the summer of 1882), and contrived to get himself arrested, and
imprisoned for a short time. He then wrote a book or pamphlet on the
subject, with the result indicated in the verses, which seem to point
to his having withdrawn his work rather than resign his appointment.
Mr. Joynes still held his mastership when the _Retrospect_ was
published in November, 1882, and the popularity of the piece at Eton
was prodigious, especially the admirable line, 'They snatched a fearful
Joynes.'
P. 378. _To A. T. M._ 'The K.' was the 'A. T. M.' to whom the piece
is addressed--A. T. Myers (Arthur, a physician of some eminence), the
youngest brother of the poet parodied. Sir Herbert Stephen (by whose
permission his brother's parodies, from _Lapsus Calami_, are given)
states that in the early days of the Society for Psychical Research,
founded by F. W. H. Myers, and of the study of the newly-named
'telepathy,' such experiments were frequently tried by the members, and
he thinks it highly probable that the incident of Arthur Myers taking
peppermint in order to test the ability of an alleged telepathist
'in quite another room' to say what it was, took place in fact as
described. 'The K.' was a nickname by which A. T. M. was very generally
known among his friends and relations: the reason is obscure.
P. 379. _Wake! for the Ruddy Ball._ This imitation by Francis Thompson
of the _Rubaiyat_ was first printed in Mr. E. V. Lucas's _One Day with
Another_. It is here given by permission of Mr. Wilfrid Meynell and of
Messrs. Burns and Oates.
P. 382. _Robert Fuller Murray._ 'The Poet's Hat' and 'Andrew M'Crie'
are taken, by permission of Messrs. MacLehose and Sons, from _The
Scarlet Gown_, 1891, the parodies in which, according to Andrew Lang,
are not inferior to Calverley. 'Andrew M'Crie' is an improved edition
of the verses originally contributed to the _University News-Sheet_
(St. Andrews) in 1886, entitled 'Albert McGee.'
P. 384. A 'semi' is an undergraduate of the second, a 'tertian' of the
third, year.
P. 387. _Fish have their times to bite._ This parody of Mrs. Hemans, by
an unknown author, is taken from _College Rhymes_, 1861. The original
begins:
Leaves have their time to fall,
And flowers to wither at the north-wind's breath,
And stars to set--but all,
Thou hast _all_ seasons for thine own, O Death.
P. 390. _A Girtonian Funeral._ This parody of 'A Grammarian's Funeral'
first appeared in the _Journal of Education_, May 1, 1886, from which
it is here reprinted by the permission of the editor. The authorship is
unknown.
INDEX OF AUTHORS PARODIED OR
IMITATED
ALDRICH, THOMAS BAILEY (1836-1907):
Newell, 335
AYTOUN, WILLIAM EDMONDSTOUNE (1813-1865):
Aytoun, 254
BAYLY, THOMAS HAYNES (1797-1839):
Barham, 178
Hood, 240
BROWNING, ELIZABETH BARRETT (1806-1861):
Swinburne, 336
Taylor, Bayard, 275
BROWNING, ROBERT (1812-1889):
Calverley, 301
Collins, 287
Hood, T., jun., 325
Stephen, 376
Taylor, Bayard, 276
Traill, 348
Unknown, 390
BRYANT, WILLIAM CULLEN (1794-1878):
Newell, 333
BURNS, ROBERT (1759-1796):
Brooks, Shirley, 256
BURTON, ROBERT (1577-1640):
Lamb, 156
BUSBY, THOMAS (1755-1838):
Byron, 174
Smith, H., 54
BYRON, GEORGE GORDON, LORD (1788-1824):
Barham, 173
Calverley, 293
Maginn, 214
Peacock, 164
Smith, J. and H., 9
CAMPBELL, THOMAS (1777-1844):
Peacock, 162
'CARROLL, LEWIS.' _See_ DODGSON.
CHAUCER, GEOFFREY (1340?-1400):
Skeat, 327
COBBETT, WILLIAM (1762-1835):
Smith, J., 15
COLERIDGE, SAMUEL TAYLOR (1772-1834):
Coleridge, 142
Hogg, 118, 120
Maginn, 208
Peacock, 157
Smith, J., 49
COWPER, WILLIAM (1731-1800):
Byron, 173
Twiss, 171
CRABBE, GEORGE (1754-1832):
Smith, J., 64
DARWIN, ERASMUS (1731-1802):
Frere, Canning, and Ellis, 97
DELLA CRUSCANS, THE:
Smith, H., 29
Southey, 144
DIBDIN, CHARLES (1746-1814):
Hood, 239
DOBSON, HENRY AUSTIN (b. 1840):
Bunner, 368
DODGSON, CHARLES LUTWIDGE ('LEWIS CARROLL') (1832-1898):
Hilton, 358
DRAYTON, MICHAEL (1563-1631):
Lamb, 151
DRYDEN, JOHN (1631-1700):
Frere, 92
EMERSON, RALPH WALDO (1803-1882):
Lang, 355
Newell, 333
Taylor, Bayard, 281
FAWKES, FRANCIS (1720-1777):
Thackeray, 245
FITZGERALD, EDWARD (1809-1883):
Thompson, Francis, 379
FITZGERALD, WILLIAM THOMAS (1759?-1829):
Smith, H., 1
GOLDSMITH, OLIVER (1728-1774):
Bunner, 369
Cary, 271
GRAY, THOMAS (1716-1771):
Ellis, 81
Fanshawe, 87
Stephen, 374
HARTE, FRANCIS BRET (1839-1902):
Bunner, 367
Hilton, 360
HEMANS, FELICIA DOROTHEA (1793-1835):
Unknown, 387
HOGG, JAMES (1770-1835):
Hogg, 129
HOLMES, OLIVER WENDELL (1809-1894):
Newell, 334
HOOK, THEODORE EDWARD (1788-1841):
Smith, H., 76
INGELOW, JEAN (1820-1897):
Calverley, 304, 306
Taylor, Bayard, 277
JOHNSON, SAMUEL (1709-1784):
Smith, H., 38
KEATS, JOHN (1795-1821):
Taylor, Bayard, 274
KINGSLEY, CHARLES (1819-1875):
Unknown, 388
KOTZEBUE, AUGUST FRIEDERICH FERDINAND (1761-1819) (Benjamin
Thompson, translator):
Smith, J., 72
LAMB, CHARLES (1775-1834):
Coleridge, 142
Lamb, 154
LANDON, LELITIA ELIZABETH (1802-1838):
Thackeray, 242
LEVER, CHARLES JAMES (1806-1872):
Thackeray, 242
LEWIS, MATTHEW GREGORY (1775-1818):
Smith, H., 46
LILLO, GEORGE (1693-1739):
Smith, J., 73
LLOYD, CHARLES (1775-1839):
Coleridge, 143
LOCKER-LAMPSON, FREDERICK (1821-1895):
Traill, 347
LONGFELLOW, HENRY WADSWORTH (1807-1882):
Calverley, 292
Cary, 270
Dodgson ('Lewis Carroll'), 310
Newell, 334
Taylor, Bayard, 284
LYTTON, EDWARD GEORGE EARLE LYTTON-BULWER, LORD (1803-1873):
Aytoun, 252
Bradley, 272
LYTTON, EDWARD ROBERT BULWER, EARL OF LYTTON
('OWEN MEREDITH') (1831-1891):
Hood, T., the Younger, 324
MEREDITH, OWEN. _See_ LYTTON.
MILTON, JOHN (1608-1674):
Twiss, 167
MOORE, THOMAS (1779-1852):
Hood, 241
Maginn, 213, 214
Peacock, 163
Smith, H., 19
MORRIS, WILLIAM (1834-1896):
Lang, 356
Taylor, Bayard, 280
MYERS, FREDERIC WILLIAM HENRY (1843-1901):
Stephen, 378
PATMORE, COVENTRY KERSEY DIGHTON (1823-1896):
Swinburne, 338
POE, EDGAR ALLAN (1809-1849):
Harte, Bret, 344
Hood, T., the Younger, 323
Leigh, 330
Murray, 384
POLLOK, ROBERT (1798-1827):
Frere, 92
POOLE, JOHN (1786?-1872):
Smith, J., 70
POPE, ALEXANDER (1688-1744):
Bunner, 369
Crabbe, 86
Hood, 237
ROGERS, SAMUEL (1763-1855):
Unknown, 386
ROSSETTI, DANTE GABRIEL (1828-1882):
Lang, 353
Taylor, Bayard, 278
Traill, 351
SCOTT, SIR WALTER (1771-1832):
Gilfillan, 228
Hogg, 109
Peacock, 156
Smith, H., 32
SHAKESPEARE, WILLIAM (1564-1616):
Cary, 271
Twiss, 166, 167
SHENSTONE, WILLIAM (1714-1763):
Harte, Bret, 342
SOUTHEY, ROBERT (1774-1843):
Canning and Frere, 93, 94, 95
Dodgson ('Lewis Carroll'), 309
Hogg, 123
Peacock, 160
Smith, J., 21
SPENCER, THE HON. WILLIAM ROBERT (1769-1834):
Smith, H., 42
SPENSER, EDMUND (1552?-1599):
Hood, 229
Keats, 216
STODDARD, RICHARD HENRY (1825-1903):
Newell, 335
SWINBURNE, ALGERNON CHARLES (1837-1909):
Bunner, 365
Collins (2), 286
Hilton, 363
Lang, 354, 355
Swinburne, 340
TAYLOR, JANE (1783-1824):
Dodgson ('Lewis Carroll'), 308
TENNYSON, ALFRED, LORD (1809-1892):
Bradley ('Cuthbert Bede'), 273
Calverley, 296
Collins, 287
Dodgson ('Lewis Carroll'), 314
Hood, T., the Younger, 324
Locker-Lampson, 268
Martin, 258
Murray, 382, 383
Rossetti (2), 290
Taylor, Tom, 266
THACKERAY, WILLIAM MAKEPEACE (1811-1863):
Thackeray, 243
THOMPSON, BENJAMIN (1776?-1816), translator of Kotzebue:
Smith, J., 72
TUPPER, MARTIN FARQUHAR (1810-1889):
Brooks, Shirley, 256
Calverley, 298
WATTS, ISAAC (1674-1748):
Dodgson ('Lewis Carroll') (2), 308
WHITMAN, WALT (1819-1892):
Bunner, 370
Stephen, 377
WHITTIER, JOHN GREENLEAF (1807-1892):
Harte, Bret, 343
Newell, 334
Taylor, Bayard, 282
WILLIAMS, SIR CHARLES HANBURY (1708-1759):
Moore, 155
WILLIS, NATHANIEL PARKER (1806-1867):
Newell, 333
WOLFE, CHARLES (1791-1823):
Barham, 176
WORDSWORTH, WILLIAM (1770-1850):
Coleridge, H., 218
Fanshawe, 89
Hogg, 110
Keats, 217
Leigh, 329
Reynolds, 219
Shelley, 179
Smith, J., 4
Stephen, 376
INDEX OF FIRST LINES
PAGE
A Clerk ther was of Cauntebrigge also _Skeat_ 327
A diagnosis of our hist'ry proves _Newell_ 334
A dingy donkey, formal and unchanged _Frere_ 92
Alack! 'tis melancholy theme to think _Hood_ 229
And this reft house is that the which he
built _Coleridge_ 143
Art thou beautiful, O my daughter, as the
budding rose of April _Calverley_ 298
As manager of horses Mr. Merryman is _H. Smith_ 76
As o'er the hill we roam'd at will _Calverley_ 296
As sea-foam blown of the winds, as blossom
of brine that is drifted _Bunner_ 365
A strange vibration from the cottage window _Bayard Taylor_ 284
A sweet, acidulous, down-reaching thrill _Bayard Taylor_ 274
At home alone, O Nomades _Bunner_ 368
Away, fond dupes! who, smit with sacred lore _H. Smith_ 54
Back in the years when Phlagstaff, the Dane,
was monarch _Newell_ 334
Balmy Zephyrs, lightly flitting _H. Smith_ 29
Beautiful Soup, so rich and green _Dodgson_ 322
Behold the flag! Is it not a flag _Newell_ 335
Birthdays? Yes, in a general way _Stephen_ 376
Brown o' San Juan _Bret Harte_ 367
By myself walking _Lamb_ 153
Cabbages! bright green cabbages _Thackeray_ 242
Can there be a moon in heaven to-night _Hogg_ 120
Choose judiciously thy friends; for to
discard them is undesirable _Calverley_ 299
Come, give us more Livings and Rectors _Moore_ 155
Come hither, my heart's darling _Aytoun_ 254
Come, little Drummer Boy, lay down your
knapsack here _Canning and
Frere_ 93
Comrades, you may pass the rosy. With
permission of the chair _Martin_ 258
Dear Jack, this white mug that with Guinness
I fill, _Thackeray_ 245
Fare-tinted cheeks, clear eyelids drawn _Bayard Taylor_ 278
Farewell, farewell, to my mother's own daughter _Hood_ 241
Fhairshon swore a feud _Aytoun_ 250
Fill me once more the foaming pewter up _Aytoun_ 252
Fine merry franions _Lamb_ 151
Fish have their times to bite _Unknown_ 387
For one long term, or e'er her trial came _Canning and
Frere_ 93
From his shoulder Hiawatha _Dodgson_ 310
From the depth of the dreamy decline of the dawn _Swinburne_ 340
George Barnwell stood at the shop-door _J. Smith_ 73
Getting his pictures, like his supper, cheap _Rossetti_ 290
Go, boy, and thy good mistress tell _J. Smith_ 70
Hail, glorious edifice, stupendous work _H. Smith_ 1
Hang thee, vile North-Easter _Unknown_ 388
He is to weet a melancholy carle _Keats_ 216
He lived amidst th' untrodden ways _H. Coleridge_ 218
He must be holpen; yet how help shall I _Bayard Taylor_ 280
Hence, loath'd vulgarity _Twiss_ 167
Here, where old Nankin glitters _Lang_ 355
Home! at the word, what blissful visions rise _Bunner_ 369
How doth the little crocodile _Dodgson_ 308
How troublesome is day _Peacock_ 160
I am a blessed Glendoveer _J. Smith_ 21
I am tenant of nine feet by four _Twiss_ 171
I am two brothers with one face _Rossetti_ 290
I, Angelo, obese, black-garmented _Bayard Taylor_ 276
I count it true which sages teach _T. Hood, jun._ 324
If ever chance or choice thy footsteps lead _Hogg_ 110
If life were never bitter _Collins_ 286
If the wild bowler thinks he bowls, _Lang_ 355
I have found out a gift for my fair _Bret Harte_ 342
I loiter down by thorp and town _Calverley_ 297
I marvelled why a simple child _Leigh_ 329
I'm a shrimp! I'm a shrimp, of diminutive size _Brough_ 289
In a bowl to sea went wise men three _Peacock_ 157
In moss-prankt dells which the sunbeams flatter _Calverley_ 304
In those old days which poets say were golden _Calverley_ 293
In vale of Thirlemere, once on a time _Hogg_ 123
It is an auncient Waggonere _Maginn_ 208
It is the thirty-first of March _Reynolds_ 219
It was many and many a year ago _Murray_ 384
I've stood in Margate, on a bridge of size _Barham_ 176
I was a timid little antelope _Thackeray_ 245
I would I were that portly gentleman _Southey_ 145
King Arthur, growing very tired indeed _Collins_ 287
Ladies and Gentlemen, As it is now the
universally admitted _J. Smith_ 61
Lady Clara Vere de Vere _T. Hood, jun._ 324
Lazy-bones, Lazy-bones, wake up, and peep _Lamb_ 154
Let us begin and portion out these sweets _Unknown_ 390
Little Cupid one day on a sunbeam was floating _Peacock_ 163
Long by the willow-trees _Thackeray_ 243
Look in my face. My name is Used-to-was _Traill_ 352
Love spake to me and said _Lang_ 353
Lo! where the gaily vestur'd throng _Fanshawe_ 87
Maud Muller, all that summer day _Bret Harte_ 343
Mine is a house at Notting Hill _Unknown_ 386
More luck to honest poverty _Brooks_ 256
Most thinking People, When persons address
an audience _J. Smith_ 15
Mr. Jack, your address, says the Prompter to me _J. Smith_ 52
My brother Jack was nine in May _J. Smith_ 4
My native land, thy Puritanic stock _Newell_ 334
My palate is parched with Pierian thirst _H. Smith_ 46
My pensive Public, wherefore look you sad _J. Smith_ 49
My spirit, in the doorway's pause _Swinburne_ 338
Needy Knife-grinder! whither are you going _Canning and
Frere_ 95
Not a _sous_ had he got,--not a guinea or note _Barham_ 176
Object belov'd! when day to eve gives place _Bradley_ 272
O cool in the summer is salad _Collins_ 286
Oh! be the day accurst that gave me birth _Southey_ 149
O heard ye never of Wat o' the Cleuch _Hogg_ 109
Oh no! we'll never mention him _Barham_ 178
O! I do love thee, meek _Simplicity_! _Coleridge_ 142
Once upon an evening weary, shortly after
Lord Dundreary _Leigh_ 330
One hue of our flag is taken _Newell_ 333
Our parodies are ended. These our authors _Twiss_ 167
O why should our dull retrospective addresses _H. Smith_ 19
Pensive at eve on the _hard_ world I mus'd _Coleridge_ 142
Peter Bells, one, two and three _Shelley_ 179
Pure water it plays a good part in _Hood_ 239
Put case I circumvent and kill him: good _Traill_ 348
Rash Painter! canst thou give the ORB OF DAY _Southey_ 144
Read not Milton, for he is dry; nor
Shakespeare, for he wrote of common life _Calverley_ 300
Read, read, _Woodstock_ and _Waverley_ _Gilfillan_ 228
Robert Pollok, A.M.! this work of yours _Frere_ 92
Said a poet to a woodlouse--'Thou art
certainly my brother' _Swinburne_ 336
St. Stephen's is a stage _Twiss_ 166
Sated with home, of wife, of children tired _J. and H.
Smith_ 9
Scarlet spaces of sand and ocean _Bayard Taylor_ 277
See where the K., in sturdy self-reliance _Stephen_ 378
She held a _Cup and Ball_ of ivory white _Southey_ 144
Sir Ralph he is hardy and mickle of might _Lang_ 356
Sir, To the gewgaw fetters of _rhyme_ _J. Smith_ 15
Sobriety, cease to be sober _H. Smith_ 42
Soft little beasts, how pleasantly ye lie _Brooks_ 256
So in the village inn the poet dwelt _Murray_ 383
Some have denied a soul! THEY NEVER LOVED _Southey_ 145
--So the stately bust abode _Taylor_ 266
Source immaterial of material naught _Newell_ 333
Stay your rude steps, or e'er your feet invade _Frere, Canning,
and Ellis_ 97
Strahan, Tonson, Lintot of the times _Byron_ 173
Strange beauty, eight-limbed and eight-handed _Hilton_ 363
Study first Propriety: for she is indeed
the Polestar _Calverley_ 298
Survey this shield, all bossy bright _H. Smith_ 32
That very time I saw, (but thou could'st not,) _Cary_ 271
That which was organized by the moral ability _H. Smith_ 38
The auld wife sat at her ivied door _Calverley_ 306
The autumn upon us was rushing _T. Hood, jun._ 323
The burden of hard hitting: slog away _Lang_ 354
The chapel bell, with hollow mournful sound _Ellis_ 81
The clear cool note of the cuckoo which has
ousted the legitimate nest-holder _Stephen_ 377
The comb between whose ivory teeth she strains _Southey_ 148
The day is done, and darkness _Cary_ 270
The Gothic looks solemn _Keats_ 217
The last lamp of the alley _Maginn_ 214
The little brown squirrel hops in the corn _Newell_ 335
The mighty spirit, and its power which stains _Crabbe_ 86
The Pacha sat in his divan _Maginn_ 214
The rain had fallen, the Poet arose _Murray_ 382
The rain was raining cheerfully _Hilton_ 358
There, pay it, James! 'tis cheaply earned _Traill_ 347
There is a fever of the spirit _Peacock_ 164
There is a river clear and fair _Fanshawe_ 89
There wase ane katt, and ane gude greye katt _Hogg_ 129
The Scotts, Kerrs, and Murrays, and
Deloraines all _Peacock_ 156
The skies they were ashen and sober _Bret Harte_ 344
The sun sinks softly to his evening post _Newell_ 333
Those Evening Bells, those Evening Bells _Hood_ 241
Thou who, when fears attack _Calverley_ 292
'Tis mine! what accents can my joy declare _Southey_ 146
'Tis sweet to view, from half-past five to six _J. Smith_ 66
'Tis the voice of the lobster _Dodgson_ 308
'Twas not the brown of chestnut boughs _Bayard Taylor_ 275
Twinkle, twinkle, little bat _Dodgson_ 308
Two swains or clowns--but call them swains _Hood_ 237
Two voices are there: one is of the deep _Stephen_ 376
Untrue to my Ulric I never could be _Thackeray_ 248
Waitress, with eyes so marvellous black _Collins_ 287
Wake! for the Ruddy Ball has taken flight _Thompson_ 379
Was it not lovely to behold _Hogg_ 118
Wearisome Sonnetteer, feeble and querulous _Canning and
Frere_ 94
We met--'twas in a mob--and I thought he
had done me _Hood_ 240
We seek to know, and knowing, seek _Bradley_ 273
What stately vision mocks my waking sense _H. Smith_ 7
Whene'er with haggard eyes I view _Canning and
Ellis_ 107
When energizing objects men pursue _Byron_ 174
When he whispers, 'O Miss Bailey!' _Locker-Lampson_ 268
When he who adores thee has left but the dregs _Maginn_ 213
When lovely woman wants a favour _Cary_ 271
Where'er there's a thistle to feed a linnet _T. Hood, jun._ 325
Where the Moosatockmaguntic _Bayard Taylor_ 282
Which I wish to remark _Hilton_ 360
Who has e'er been at Drury must needs know
the Stranger _J. Smith_ 72
Whoso answers my questions _Bayard Taylor_ 281
With hands tight clenched through matted hair _Dodgson_ 314
Why do you wear your hair like a man _Traill_ 350
Ye bigot spires, ye Tory towers _Stephen_ 374
Ye kite-flyers of Scotland _Peacock_ 162
Ye Sylphs, who _banquet_ on my Delia's blush _Southey_ 147
Yonder to the kiosk, beside the creek _Thackeray_ 246
'You are old, Father William,' the young
man said _Dodgson_ 309
You over there, young man, with the guide-book _Bunner_ 370
Your Fanny was never false-hearted _Thackeray_ 247
You see this pebble-stone? It's a thing
I bought _Calverley_ 301
You've all heard of Larry O'Toole _Thackeray_ 242
Zuleikah! The young Agas in the bazaar _Thackeray_ 246
BILLING AND SONS, LIMITED, PRINTERS, GUILDFORD.
FOOTNOTES:
[1] The preface is given at the beginning of the Notes on p. 393.
[2] WILLIAM THOMAS FITZGERALD. The annotator's first personal knowledge
of this gentleman was at Harry Greville's Pic-Nic Theatre, in Tottenham
Street, where he personated Zanga in a wig too small for his head.
The second time of seeing him was at the table of old Lord Dudley,
who familiarly called him Fitz, but forgot to name him in his will.
The Earl's son (recently deceased), however, liberally supplied the
omission by a donation of five thousand pounds. The third and last
time of encountering him was at an anniversary dinner of the Literary
Fund, at the Freemasons' Tavern. Both parties, as two of the stewards,
met their brethren in a small room about half an hour before dinner.
The lampooner, out of delicacy, kept aloof from the poet. The latter,
however, made up to him, when the following dialogue took place:
Fitzgerald (with good humour): 'Mr.----, I mean to recite after dinner.'
Mr.----: 'Do you?'
Fitzgerald: 'Yes; you'll have more of "God bless the Regent and the
Duke of York!"'
The whole of this imitation, after a lapse of twenty years, appears to
the Authors too personal and sarcastic; but they may shelter themselves
under a very broad mantle:
'Let hoarse Fitzgerald bawl
His creaking couplets in a tavern-hall.'
BYRON.
[3] 'The first piece, under the name of the loyal Mr. Fitzgerald,
though as good, we suppose, as the original, is not very interesting.
Whether it be very like Mr. Fitzgerald or not, however, it must
be allowed that the vulgarity, servility, and gross absurdity
of the newspaper scribblers is well rendered in the following
lines.'--_Edinburgh Review._
[4] In plain English, the Halfpenny-hatch, then a footway through
fields; but now, as the same bards sing elsewhere--
'St. George's Fields are fields no more,
The trowel supersedes the plough;
Swamps, huge and inundate of yore,
Are changed to civic villas now.'
Fitzgerald actually sent in an address to the committee on the 31st
of August, 1812. It was published among the other genuine _Rejected
Addresses_, in one volume, in that year. The following is an extract:--
'The troubled shade of Garrick, hovering near,
Dropt on the burning pile a pitying tear.'
What a pity that, like Sterne's recording angel, it did not succeed in
blotting the fire out for ever! That failing, why not adopt Gulliver's
remedy?
[5] WILLIAM WORDSWORTH.
[6] Jack and Nancy, as it was afterwards remarked to the Authors, are
here made to come into the world at periods not sufficiently remote.
The writers were then bachelors. One of them, unfortunately, still
continues so, as he has thus recorded in his niece's album:
'Should I seek Hymen's tie,
As a poet I die--
Ye Benedicks, mourn my distresses!
For what little fame
Is annexed to my name
Is derived from _Rejected Addresses_.'
The blunder, notwithstanding, remains unrectified. The reader of poetry
is always dissatisfied with emendations: they sound discordantly upon
the ear, like a modern song, by Bishop or Braham, introduced in _Love
in a Village_.
[7] This alludes to the young Betty mania. The writer was in the
stage-box at the height of this young gentleman's popularity. One of
the other occupants offered, in a loud voice, to prove that young
Betty did not understand Shakespeare. 'Silence!' was the cry; but he
still proceeded. 'Turn him out!' was the next ejaculation. He still
vociferated 'He does not understand Shakespeare;' and was consequently
shouldered into the lobby. 'I'll prove it to you,' said the critic
to the door-keeper. 'Prove what, sir?' 'That he does not understand
Shakespeare.' This was Molière's housemaid with a vengeance!
Young Betty may now be seen walking about town--a portly personage,
aged about forty--clad in a furred and frogged surtout; probably
muttering to himself (as he has been at college), 'O mihi præteritos!'
&c.
[8] For an account of this anonymous gentleman, see the Preface.
[9] LORD BYRON.
[10] This would seem to show that poet and prophet are synonymous, the
noble bard having afterwards returned to England, and again quitted it,
under domestic circumstances painfully notorious. His good-humoured
forgiveness of the Authors has been already alluded to in the Preface.
Nothing of this illustrious poet, however trivial, can be otherwise
than interesting. 'We knew him well.' At Mr. Murray's dinner-table the
annotator met him and Sir John Malcolm. Lord Byron talked of intending
to travel in Persia. 'What must I do when I set off?' said he to Sir
John. 'Cut off your buttons!' 'My buttons! what, these metal ones?'
'Yes; the Persians are in the main very honest fellows; but if you go
thus bedizened, you will infallibly be murdered for your buttons.' At
a dinner at Monk Lewis's chambers in the Albany, Lord Byron expressed
to the writer his determination not to go there again, adding, 'I never
will dine with a middle-aged man who fills up his table with young
ensigns, and has looking-glass panels to his book-cases.' Lord Byron,
when one of the Drury Lane Committee of Management, challenged the
writer to sing alternately (like the swains in Virgil) the praises of
Mrs. Mardyn, the actress, who, by the by, was hissed off the stage for
an imputed intimacy, of which she was quite innocent.
The contest ran as follows:
'Wake, muse of fire, your ardent lyre,
Pour forth your amorous ditty,
But first profound, in duty bound,
Applaud the new committee;
Their scenic art from Thespis cart
All jaded nags discarding,
To London drove this queen of love,
Enchanting Mrs. Mardyn.
'Though tides of love around her rove,
I fear she'll choose Pactolus--
In that bright surge bards ne'er immerge,
So I must e'en swim solus.
"Out, out, alas!" ill-fated gas,
That shin'st round Covent Garden,
Thy ray how flat, compared with that
From eye of Mrs. Mardyn!'
And so on. The reader has, no doubt, already discovered 'which is the
justice, and which is the thief.'
Lord Byron at that time wore a very narrow cravat of white sarsnet,
with the shirt-collar falling over it; a black coat and waistcoat,
and very broad white trousers, to hide his lame foot--these were of
Russia duck in the morning, and jean in the evening. His watch-chain
had a number of small gold seals appended to it, and was looped up to
a button of his waistcoat. His face was void of colour; he wore no
whiskers. His eyes were grey, fringed with long black lashes; and his
air was imposing, but rather supercilious. He undervalued David Hume;
denying his claim to genius on account of his bulk, and calling him,
from the heroic epistle,
'The fattest hog in Epicurus' sty.'
One of this extraordinary man's allegations was, that 'fat is an oily
dropsy.' To stave off its visitation, he frequently chewed tobacco in
lieu of dinner, alleging that it absorbed the gastric juice of the
stomach, and prevented hunger. 'Pass your hand down my side,' said his
lordship to the writer; 'can you count my ribs?' 'Every one of them.'
'I am delighted to hear you say so. I called last week on Lady ----;
"Ah, Lord Byron," said she, "how fat you grow!" But you know Lady ----
is fond of saying spiteful things!' Let this gossip be summed up with
the words of Lord Chesterfield, in his character of Bolingbroke: 'Upon
the whole, on a survey of this extraordinary character, what can we say
but "Alas, poor human nature!"'
His favourite Pope's description of man is applicable to Byron
individually:
'Chaos of thought and passion all confused,
Still by himself abused or disabused;
Created part to rise and part to fall,
Great lord of all things, yet a slave to all;
Sole judge of truth, in endless error hurled--
The glory, jest, and riddle of the world.'
The writer never heard him allude to his deformed foot except upon one
occasion, when, entering the green-room of Drury Lane, he found Lord
Byron alone, the younger Byrne and Miss Smith the dancer having just
left him, after an angry conference about a _pas seul_. 'Had you been
here a minute sooner,' said Lord B., 'you would have heard a question
about dancing referred to me;--me! (looking mournfully downward) whom
fate from my birth has prohibited from taking a single step.'
[11] 'Holland's edifice.' The late theatre was built by Holland the
architect. The writer visited it on the night of its opening. The
performances were _Macbeth_ and the _Virgin Unmasked_. Between the
play and the farce, an excellent epilogue, written by George Colman,
was excellently spoken by Miss Farren. It referred to the iron curtain
which was, in the event of fire, to be let down between the stage and
the audience, and which accordingly descended, by way of experiment,
leaving Miss Farren between the lamps and the curtain. The fair
speaker informed the audience, that should the fire break out on the
stage (where it usually originates), it would thus be kept from the
spectators; adding, with great solemnity--
'No! we assure our generous benefactors
'Twill only burn the scenery and the actors!'
A tank of water was afterwards exhibited, in the course of the
epilogue, in which a wherry was rowed by a real live man, the band
playing--
'And did you not hear of a jolly young waterman?'
Miss Farren reciting--
'Sit still, there's nothing in it,
We'll undertake to drown you in a single minute.'
'O vain thought!' as Othello says. Notwithstanding the boast in the
epilogue--
'Blow, wind--come, wrack, in ages yet unborn,
Our castle's strength shall laugh a siege to scorn'--
the theatre fell a victim to the flames within fifteen years from the
prognostic! These preparations against fire always presuppose presence
of mind and promptness in those who are to put them into action. They
remind one of the dialogue, in Morton's _Speed the Plough_, between Sir
Abel Handy and his son Bob:
'_Bob._ Zounds, the castle's on fire!
_Sir A._ Yes.
_Bob._ Where's your patent liquid for extinguishing fire?
_Sir A._ It is not mixed.
_Bob._ Then where's your patent fire-escape?
_Sir A._ It is not fixed.
_Bob._ You are never at a loss?
_Sir A._ Never.
_Bob._ Then what do you mean to do?
_Sir A._ I don't know.'
[12] A rather obscure mode of expression for _Jews'_-harp; which some
etymologists allege, by the way, to be a corruption of _Jaws'_-harp. No
connexion, therefore, with King David.
[13] WILLIAM COBBETT--now M.P.
[14] Bagshaw. At that time the publisher of Cobbett's Register.
[15] The old Lyceum Theatre, pulled down by Mr. Arnold. That since
destroyed by fire was erected on its site.
[16] An allusion to a murder then recently committed on Barnes Terrace.
[17] At that time keeper of Newgate. The present superintendent is
styled governor!
[18] A portentous one that made its appearance in the year 1811; in the
midst of the war,
with fear of change
Perplexing nations.
[19] THOMAS MOORE.
[20] '_The Living Lustres_ appears to us a very fair imitation of the
fantastic verses which that ingenious person, Mr. Moore, indites when
he is merely gallant, and, resisting the lures of voluptuousness, is
not enough in earnest to be tender.'--_Edinburgh Review._
[21] This alludes to two massive pillars of verd antique which then
flanked the proscenium, but which have since been removed. Their colour
reminds the bard of the Emerald Isle, and this causes him (_more suo_)
to fly off at a tangent, and Hibernicise the rest of the poem.
[22] ROBERT SOUTHEY.
[23] For the Glendoveer, and the rest of the _dramatis personæ_ of this
imitation, the reader is referred to the 'Curse of Kehama.'
[24] '_The Rebuilding_ is in the name of Mr. Southey, and is one of
the best in the collection. It is in the style of the "Kehama" of that
multifarious author; and is supposed to be spoken in the character of
one of his Glendoveers. The imitation of the diction and measure, we
think, is nearly almost perfect; and the descriptions as good as the
original. It opens with an account of the burning of the old theatre,
formed upon the pattern of the Funeral of Arvalan.'--_Edinburgh Review._
[25] This couplet was introduced by the Authors by way of bravado, in
answer to one who alleged that the English language contained no rhyme
to chimney.
[26] Apollo. A gigantic wooden figure of this deity was erected on the
roof. The writer (_horrescit referens!_) is old enough to recollect
the time when it was first placed there. Old Bishop, then one of
the masters of Merchant Tailors' School, wrote an epigram upon the
occasion, which, referring to the aforesaid figure, concluded thus:
'Above he fills up Shakespeare's place,
And Shakespeare fills up his below'--
Very antithetical: but quære as to the meaning? The writer, like Pluto,
'long puzzled his brain' to find it out, till he was immersed 'in a
lower deep' by hearing Madame de Staël say, at the table of the late
Lord Dillon, 'Buonaparte is not a man, but a system.' Inquiry was made
in the course of the evening of Sir James Mackintosh as to what the
lady meant. He answered, 'Mass! I cannot tell.' Madame de Staël repeats
this apophthegm in her work on Germany. It is probably understood
_there_.
[27] O. P. This personage, who is alleged to have growled like a
bull-dog, requires rather a lengthened note, for the edification of
the rising generation. The 'horns, rattles, drums,' with which he is
accompanied, are no inventions of the poet. The new Covent Garden
Theatre opened on the 18th Sept., 1809, when a cry of 'Old Prices'
(afterwards diminished to O. P.) burst out from every part of the
house. This continued and increased in violence till the 23rd, when
rattles, drums, whistles, and cat-calls, having completely drowned
the voices of the actors, Mr. Kemble, the stage-manager, came forward
and said, that a committee of gentlemen had undertaken to examine the
finances of the concern, and that until they were prepared with their
report the theatre would continue closed. 'Name them!' was shouted
from all sides. The names were declared, viz. Sir Charles Price, the
Solicitor-General, the Recorder of London, the Governor of the Bank,
and Mr. Angersteen. 'All shareholders!' bawled a wag from the gallery.
In a few days the theatre re-opened: the public paid no attention to
the report of the referees, and the tumult was renewed for several
weeks with even increased violence. The proprietors now sent in hired
bruisers, to _mill_ the refractory into subjection. This irritated most
of their former friends, and, amongst the rest, the annotator, who
accordingly wrote the song of 'Heigh-ho, says Kemble,' which was caught
up by the ballad-singers, and sung under Mr. Kemble's house-windows
in Great Russell Street. A dinner was given at the Crown and Anchor
Tavern in the Strand, to celebrate the victory obtained by W. Clifford
in his action against Brandon the box-keeper, for assaulting him
for wearing the letters O. P. in his hat. At this dinner Mr. Kemble
attended, and matters were compromised by allowing the advanced price
(seven shillings) to the boxes. The writer remembers a former riot of a
similar sort at the same theatre (in the year 1792), when the price to
the boxes was raised from five shillings to six. That tumult, however,
only lasted three nights.
[28] 'From the knobb'd bludgeon to the taper switch.' This image is
not the creation of the poets: it sprang from reality. The Authors
happened to be at the Royal Circus when 'God save the King' was called
for, accompanied by a cry of 'Stand up!' and 'Hats off!' An inebriated
naval lieutenant perceiving a gentleman in an adjoining box slow to
obey the call, struck his hat off with his stick, exclaiming, 'Take off
your hat, sir!' The other thus assaulted proved to be, unluckily for
the lieutenant, Lord Camelford, the celebrated bruiser and duellist.
A set-to in the lobby was the consequence, where his lordship quickly
proved victorious. 'The devil is not so black as he is painted,' said
one of the Authors to the other; 'let us call upon Lord Camelford, and
tell him that we were witnesses of his being first assaulted.' The
visit was paid on the ensuing morning at Lord Camelford's lodging, in
Bond Street. Over the fire-place in the drawing-room were ornaments
strongly expressive of the pugnacity of the peer. A long thick bludgeon
lay horizontally supported by two brass hooks. Above this was placed
parallel one of lesser dimensions, until a pyramid of weapons gradually
arose, tapering to a horsewhip:
'Thus all below was strength, and all above was grace.'
Lord Camelford received his visitants with great civility, and
thanked them warmly for the call; adding, that their evidence would
be material, it being his intention to indict the lieutenant for an
assault. 'All I can say in return is this,' exclaimed the peer with
great cordiality, 'if ever I see you engaged in a row, upon my soul,
I'll stand by you.' The Authors expressed themselves thankful for so
potent an ally, and departed. In about a fortnight afterwards Lord
Camelford was shot in a duel with Mr. Best.
[29] Veeshnoo. The late Mr. Whitbread.
[30] Levy. An insolvent Israelite who threw himself from the top of the
Monument a short time before. An inhabitant of Monument Yard informed
the writer, that he happened to be standing at his door talking to a
neighbour; and looking up at the top of the pillar, exclaimed, 'Why,
here's the flag coming down.' 'Flag!' answered the other, 'it's a man.'
The words were hardly uttered when the suicide fell within ten feet of
the speakers.
[31] The Authors, as in gallantry bound, wish this lady to continue
anonymous.
[32] WALTER SCOTT.
[33] Sir Walter Scott informed the annotator, that at one time he
intended to print his collected works, and had pitched upon this
identical quotation as a motto;--a proof that sometimes great wits jump
with little ones.
[34] Alluding to the then great distance between the picture-frame, in
which the green curtain was set, and the band. For a justification of
this see below--DR. JOHNSON.
[35] Old Bedlam at that time stood 'close by London Wall.' It was
built after the model of the Tuileries, which is said to have given
the French king great offence. In front of it Moorfields extended,
with broad gravel walks crossing each other at right angles. These the
writer well recollects; and Rivaz, an underwriter at Lloyd's, has told
him, that he remembered when the merchants of London would parade these
walks on a summer evening with their wives and daughters. But now, as a
punning brother bard sings,
'Moorfields are fields no more.'
[36] Whitbread's shears. An economical experiment of that gentleman.
The present portico, towards Brydges Street, was afterwards erected
under the lesseeship of Elliston, whose portrait in the Exhibition was
thus noticed in the _Examiner_: 'Portrait of the great lessee, in his
favourite character of Mr. Elliston.'
[37] 'Samuel Johnson is not so good: the measure and solemnity of his
sentences, in all the limited variety of their structure, are indeed
imitated with singular skill; but the diction is caricatured in a
vulgar and unpleasing degree. To make Johnson call a door "a ligneous
barricado," and its knocker and bell its "frappant and tintinnabulant
appendages," is neither just nor humorous; and we are surprised that
a writer who has given such extraordinary proofs of his talent for
finer ridicule and fairer imitation, should have stooped to a vein of
pleasantry so low, and so long ago exhausted; especially as, in other
passages of the same piece, he has shewn how well qualified he was both
to catch and to render the true characteristics of his original. The
beginning, for example, we think excellent.'--_Edinburgh Review._
[38] The celebrated Lord Chesterfield, whose Letters to his Son,
according to Dr. Johnson, inculcate 'the manners of a dancing-master
and the morals of----,' &c.
[39] Lord Mayor of the theatric sky. This alludes to Leigh Hunt, who,
in _The Examiner_, at this time kept the actors in hot water. Dr.
Johnson's argument is, like many of his other arguments, specious,
but untenable; that which it defends has since been abandoned as
impracticable. Mr. Whitbread contended that the actor was like a
portrait in a picture, and accordingly placed the green curtain in a
gilded frame remote from the foot-lights; alleging that no performer
should mar the illusion by stepping out of the frame. Dowton was the
first actor who, like Manfred's ancestor in the _Castle of Otranto_,
took the liberty of abandoning the canon. 'Don't tell me of frames
and pictures,' ejaculated the testy comedian; 'if I can't be heard by
the audience in the frame, I'll walk out of it!' The proscenium has
since been new-modelled, and the actors thereby brought nearer to the
audience.
[40] WILLIAM SPENCER.
[41] Sobriety, &c. The good-humour of the poet upon occasion of
this parody has been noticed in the Preface. 'It's all very well
for once,' said he afterwards, in comic confidence, at his villa at
Petersham, 'but don't do it again. I had been almost forgotten when
you revived me; and now all the newspapers and reviews ring with,
"this fashionable, trashy author."' The sand and 'filings of glass,'
mentioned in the last stanza, are referable to the well-known verses of
the poet apologising to a lady for having paid an unconscionably long
morning visit; and where, alluding to Time, he says,
'All his sands are diamond sparks,
That glitter as they pass.'
Few men in society have more 'gladdened life' than this poet. He
now resides in Paris, and may thence make the grand tour without an
interpreter--speaking, as he does, French, Italian, and German, as
fluently as English.
[42] Congreve's plug. The late Sir William Congreve had made a model of
Drury Lane Theatre, to which was affixed an engine that, in the event
of fire, was made to play from the stage into every box in the house.
The writer, accompanied by Theodore Hook, went to see the model at Sir
William's house in Cecil Street. 'Now I'll duck Whitbread!' said Hook,
seizing the water-pipe whilst he spoke, and sending a torrent of water
into the brewer's box.
[43] See Byron, _afterwards_, in _Don Juan_:--
'For flesh is grass, which Time mows down to hay.'
But, as Johnson says of Dryden, 'His known wealth was so great, he
might borrow without any impeachment of his credit.'
[44] MATTHEW GREGORY LEWIS, commonly called Monk Lewis, from his once
popular romance of that name. He was a good-hearted man, and, like too
many of that fraternity, a disagreeable one--verbose, disputatious, and
paradoxical. His _Monk_ and _Castle Spectre_ elevated him into fame;
and he continued to write ghost-stories till, following as he did in
the wake of Mrs. Radcliffe, he quite overstocked the market. Lewis
visited his estates in Jamaica, and came back perfectly negro-bitten.
He promulgated a new code of laws in the island, for the government
of his sable subjects: one may serve for a specimen: 'Any slave who
commits murder shall have his head shaved, and be confined three days
and nights in a dark room.' Upon occasion of printing these parodies,
Monk Lewis said to Lady H., 'Many of them are very fair, but mine is
not at all like; they have made me write burlesque, which I never do.'
'You don't know your own talent,' answered the lady.
Lewis aptly described himself, as to externals, in the verses affixed
to his _Monk_, as having
'A graceless form and dwarfish stature.'
He had, moreover, large grey eyes, thick features, and an inexpressive
countenance. In talking, he had a disagreeable habit of drawing the
fore-finger of his right hand across his right eyelid. He affected, in
conversation, a sort of dandified, drawling tone; young Harlowe, the
artist, did the same. A foreigner who had but a slight knowledge of
the English language might have concluded, from their cadences, that
they were little better than fools--'just a born goose,' as Terry the
actor used to say. Lewis died on his passage homeward from Jamaica,
owing to a dose of James's powders injudiciously administered by 'his
own mere motion.' He wrote various plays, with various success: he had
an admirable notion of dramatic construction, but the goodness of his
scenes and incidents was marred by the badness of his dialogue.
[45] SAMUEL TAYLOR COLERIDGE.
[46] 'He of Blackfriars' Road,' viz. the late Rev. Rowland Hill, who is
said to have preached a sermon congratulating his congregation on the
catastrophe.
[47] 'Oh, Mr. Whitbread!' Sir William Grant, then Master of the Rolls,
repeated this passage aloud at a Lord Mayor's dinner, to the no small
astonishment of the writer, who happened to sit within ear-shot.
[48] 'Padmanaba,' viz. in a pantomime called _Harlequin in Padmanaba_.
This elephant, some years afterwards, was exhibited over Exeter
'Change, where, the reader will remember, it was found necessary to
destroy the poor animal by discharges of musketry. When he made his
entrance in the pantomime above mentioned, Johnson, the machinist of
the rival house, exclaimed, 'I should be very sorry if I could not make
a better elephant than that!' Johnson was right: we go to the theatre
to be pleased with the skill of the imitator, and not to look at the
reality.
[49] DR. BUSBY. This gentleman gave living recitations of his
translation of _Lucretius_, with tea and bread-and-butter. He sent in
a real Address to the Drury Lane Committee, which was really rejected.
The present imitation professes to be recited by the translator's son.
The poet here, again, was a prophet. A few evenings after the opening
of the theatre, Dr. Busby sat with his son in one of the stage-boxes.
The latter, to the astonishment of the audience, at the end of the
play, stepped from the box upon the stage, his father's real rejected
address in his hand, and began to recite it as follows:-
'When energising objects men pursue,
What are the miracles they cannot do?'
Raymond, the stage-manager, accompanied by a constable, at this moment
walked upon the stage, and handed away the juvenile _dilettante_
performer.
The doctor's classical translation was thus noticed in one of the
newspapers of the day, in the column of births:--'Yesterday, at his
house in Queen Anne Street, Dr. Busby of a still-born _Lucretius_.'
[50] 'Winsor's patent gas'--at that time in its infancy. The first
place illumined by it was the Carlton House side of Pall Mall; the
second, Bishopsgate Street. The writer attended a lecture given by
the inventor: the charge of admittance was three shillings, but, as
the inventor was about to apply to parliament, members of both houses
were admitted gratis. The writer and a fellow-jester assumed the
parts of senators at a short notice. 'Members of parliament!' was
their important ejaculation at the door of entrance. 'What places,
gentlemen?' 'Old Sarum and Bridgewater.' 'Walk in, gentlemen.' Luckily,
the real Simon Pures did not attend. This Pall Mall illumination was
further noticed in _Horace in London_:--
'And Winsor lights, with flame of gas,
Home, to king's place, his mother.'
[51] 'Ticket-nights.' This phrase is probably unintelligible to the
untheatrical portion of the community, which may now be said to be
all the world except the actors. Ticket-nights are those whereon the
inferior actors club for a benefit: each distributes as many tickets of
admission as he is able among his friends. A motley assemblage is the
consequence; and as each actor is encouraged by his own set, who are
not in general play-going people, the applause comes (as Chesterfield
says of Pope's attempts at wit) 'generally unseasonably and too often
unsuccessfully.'
[52] _Morning Post._
[53] The REV. GEORGE CRABBE. The writer's first interview with this
poet, who may be designated Pope in worsted stockings, took place at
William Spencer's villa at Petersham, close to what that gentleman
called his gold-fish pond, though it was scarcely three feet in
diameter, throwing up a _jet d'eau_ like a thread. The venerable
bard, seizing both the hands of his satirist, exclaimed, with a
good-humoured laugh: 'Ah! my old enemy, how do you do?' In the course
of conversation, he expressed great astonishment at his popularity
in London; adding, 'In my own village they think nothing of me.' The
subject happening to be the inroads of Time upon Beauty, the writer
quoted the following lines:--
'Six years had pass'd, and forty ere the six,
When Time began to play his usual tricks:
My locks, once comely in a virgin's sight,
Locks of pure brown, now felt th' encroaching white;
Gradual each day I liked my horses less,
My dinner more--I learnt to play at chess.'
'That's very good!' cried the bard;--'whose is it?' 'Your own.'
'Indeed! hah! well, I had quite forgotten it.' Was this affectation, or
was it not? In sooth, he seemed to push simplicity to puerility. This
imitation contained in manuscript the following lines, after describing
certain Sunday-newspaper critics who were supposed to be present at a
new play, and who were rather heated in their politics:--
'Hard is his task who edits--thankless job!
A Sunday journal for the factious mob:
With bitter paragraph and caustic jest,
He gives to turbulence the day of rest;
Condemn'd, this week, rash rancour to instil,
Or thrown aside, the next, for one who will:
Alike undone or if he praise or rail
(For this affects his safety, that his sale),
He sinks at last, in luckless limbo set,
If loud for libel, and if dumb for debt.'
They were, however, never printed; being, on reflection, considered too
serious for the occasion.
It is not a little extraordinary that Crabbe, who could write with such
vigour, should descend to such lines as the following:--
'Something had happen'd wrong about a bill
Which was not drawn with true mercantile skill;
So, to amend it, I was told to go
And seek the firm of Clutterbuck and Co.'
Surely 'Emanuel Jennings,' compared with the above, rises to sublimity.
[54] 'We come next to three ludicrous parodies--of the story of _The
Stranger_, of _George Barnwell_, and of the dagger-scene in _Macbeth_,
under the signature of Momus Medlar. They are as good, we think, as
that sort of thing can be, and remind us of the happier efforts of
Colman, whose less successful fooleries are professedly copied in the
last piece in the volume.'--_Edinburgh Review._
[55] THEODORE HOOK, at that time a very young man, and the companion of
the annotator in many wild frolics. The cleverness of his subsequent
prose compositions has cast his early stage songs into oblivion. This
parody was, in the second edition, transferred from Colman to Hook.
[56] Then Director of the Opera House.
[57] At that time the chief dancer at this establishment.
[58] Vauxhall Bridge then, like the Thames Tunnel at present, stood
suspended in the middle of that river.
[59] The Critical Reviewers. The others are the _London_ and _Monthly_.
[60] _Vide_ Admiral Tyrrel's monument in Westminster Abbey.
[61] My worthy friend, the Bellman, had promised to supply an
additional stanza, but the business of assisting the lamplighter,
chimney-sweeper, etc., with complimentary verses for their worthy
masters and mistresses, pressing on him at this season, he was obliged
to decline it.
[62] Imitated from the introductory couplet to the 'Economy of
Vegetation:'
'Stay your rude steps, whose throbbing breasts unfold
The legion friends of glory and of gold.'
This sentiment is here expanded into four lines.
[63] For the _os-culation_, or kissing of circles and other curves, see
_Huygens_, who has veiled this delicate and inflammatory subject in the
decent obscurity of a learned language.
[64] A curve supposed to resemble the sprig of ivy, from which it has
its name, and therefore peculiarly adapted to poetry.
[65] Water has been supposed, by several of our philosophers, to be
capable of the passion of love. Some later experiments appear to favour
this idea. Water, when pressed by a moderate degree of heat, has been
observed to _simper_, or _simmer_ (as it is more usually called). The
same does not hold true of any other element.
[66] _Vide_ modern prints of nymphs and shepherds dancing to nothing at
all.
[67] Imitated from the following genteel and sprightly lines in the
first canto of the 'Loves of the Plants':
'So bright its folding canopy withdrawn,
Glides the gilt landau o'er the velvet lawn,
Of beaux and belles displays the glittering throng,
And soft airs fan them as they glide along.'
[68] The Nymph of the Wheel, supposed to be in love with SMOKE-JACK.
[69] 'A figure which has one angle, _or more_, of ninety
degrees.'--_Johnson's Dictionary._ It here means a RIGHT-ANGLED
TRIANGLE, which is therefore incapable of having more than one angle of
ninety degrees, but which may, according to our author's _Prosopopœia_,
be supposed to be in love with THREE or any greater number of NYMPHS.
[70] Supposed to be the same with SATAN.
[71] The Eastern name for GENII.--_Vide_ TALES OF DITTO.
[72] A submarine palace near Tunis, where ZATANAI usually held his
Court.
[73] The Indian _Caucasus_.
[74] MR. HIGGINS does not mean to deny that SOLOMON was really King
of JUDÆA. The epithet _fabled_ applies to that empire over the Genii,
which the retrospective generosity of the Arabian fabulists has
bestowed upon this monarch.
[75] It was under this shape that _Venus_ was worshipped in _Phœnicia_.
MR. HIGGINS thinks it was the _Venus Urania_, or Celestial Venus;
in allusion to which, he supposes that the _Phœnician_ grocers
first introduced the practice of preserving sugar-loaves in blue or
sky-coloured paper. He also believes that the _conical_ form of the
original grenadiers' caps was typical of the loves of MARS and VENUS.
[76] The doctrine of mathematics. Pope calls her _mad Mathesis_.--_Vide
Johnson's Dictionary._
[77] The harmony and imagery of these lines are imperfectly imitated
from the following exquisite passage in the _Economy of Vegetation_:
'Gnomes, as you now dissect, with hammers fine,
The granite rock, the noduled flint calcine;
Grind with strong arm the circling Chertz betwixt,
Your pure ka--o--lins and Pe--tunt--ses mixt.'