The small city of Raleigh, North Carolina, it is known, is the capital of
the State, situated in the interior, and containing about thirty six
hundred inhabitants.[A] Here lived MR. SHERWOOD HAYWOOD, a man of
considerable respectability, a planter, and the cashier of a bank. He
owned three plantations, at the distances respectively of seventy-five,
thirty, and three miles from his residence in Raleigh. He owned in all
about two hundred and fifty slaves, among the rest my mother, who was a
house servant to her master, and of course a resident in the city. My
father was a slave to a near neighbor. The apartment where I was born and
where I spent my childhood and youth was called "the kitchen," situated
some fifteen or twenty rods from the "great house." Here the house
servants lodged and lived, and here the meals were prepared for the people
in the mansion.
[Footnote A: 175 whites--207 free people of color--and 2,244 slaves. Total
3,626; according to the census of 1840.]
On the 30th of May, 1803, I was ushered into the world; but I did not
begin to see the rising of its dark clouds, nor fancy how they might be
broken and dispersed, until some time afterwards. My infancy was spent
upon the floor, in a rough cradle, or sometimes in my mother's arms. My
early boyhood in playing with the other boys and girls, colored and white,
in the yard, and occasionally doing such little matters of labor as one of
so young years could. I knew no difference between myself and the white
children; nor did they seem to know any in turn. Sometimes my master would
come out and give a biscuit to me, and another to one of his own white
boys; but I did not perceive the difference between us. I had no brothers
or sisters, but there were other colored families living in the same
kitchen, and the children playing in the same yard, with me and my mother.
When I was ten or eleven years old, my master set me regularly to cutting
wood, in the yard in the winter, and working in the garden in the summer.
And when I was fifteen years of age, he gave me the care of the pleasure
horses, and made me his carriage driver; but this did not exempt me from
other labor, especially in the summer. Early in the morning I used to take
his three horses to the plantation, and turn them into the pasture to
graze, and myself into the cotton or cornfield, with a hoe in my hand, to
work through the day; and after sunset I would take these horses back to
the city, a distance of three miles, feed them, and then attend to any
other business my master or any of his family had for me to do, until bed
time, when with my blanket in my hand, I would go into the dining room to
rest through the night. The next day the same round of labor would be
repeated, unless some of the family wished to ride out, in which case I
must be on hand with the horses to wait upon them, and in the meantime
work about the yard. On Sunday I had to drive to Church twice, which with
other things necessary to be done, took the whole day. So my life went
wearily on from day to day, from night to night, and from week to week.
When I began to work, I discovered the difference between myself and my
master's white children. They began to order me about, and were told to do
so by my master and mistress. I found, too, that they had learned to read,
while I was not permitted to have a book in my hand. To be in the
possession of anything written or printed, was regarded as an offence. And
then there was the fear that I might be sold away from those who were dear
to me, and conveyed to the far South. I had learned that being a slave I
was subject to this worst (to us) of all calamities; and I knew of others
in similar situations to myself, thus sold away. My friends were not
numerous; but in proportion as they were few they were dear; and the
thought that I might be separated from them forever, was like that of
having the heart wrenched from its socket; while the idea of being
conveyed to the far South, seemed infinitely worse than the terrors of
death. To know, also, that I was never to consult my own will, but was,
while I lived, to be entirely under the control of another, was another
state of mind hard for me to bear. Indeed all things now made me _feel_,
what I had before known only in words, that _I was a slave_. Deep was this
feeling, and it preyed upon my heart like a never-dying worm. I saw no
prospect that my condition would ever be changed. Yet I used to plan in my
mind from day to day, and from night to night, how I might be free.
One day, while I was in this state of mind, my father gave me a small
basket of peaches. I sold them for thirty cents, which was the first money
I ever had in my life. Afterwards I won some marbles, and sold them for
sixty cents, and some weeks after Mr. Hog from Fayetteville, came to visit
my master, and on leaving gave me one dollar. After that Mr. Bennahan from
Orange county gave me a dollar, and a son of my master fifty cents. These
sums, and the hope that then entered my mind of purchasing at some future
time my freedom, made me long for money; and plans for money-making took
the principal possession of my thoughts. At night I would steal away with
my axe, get a load of wood to cut for twenty-five cents, and the next
morning hardly escape a whipping for the offence. But I persevered until I
had obtained twenty dollars. Now I began to think seriously of becoming
able to buy myself; and cheered by this hope, I went on from one thing to
another, laboring "at dead of night," after the long weary day's toil for
my master was over, till I found I had collected one hundred dollars. This
sum I kept hid, first in one place and then in another, as I dare not put
it out, for fear I should lose it.
After this I lit upon a plan which proved of great advantage to me. My
father suggested a mode of preparing smoking tobacco, different from any
then or since employed. It had the double advantage of giving the tobacco
a peculiarly pleasant flavor, and of enabling me to manufacture a good
article out of a very indifferent material. I improved somewhat upon his
suggestion, and commenced the manufacture, doing as I have before said,
all my work in the night. The tobacco I put up in papers of about a
quarter of a pound each, and sold them at fifteen cents. But the tobacco
could not be smoked without a pipe, and as I had given the former a flavor
peculiarly grateful, it occurred to me that I might so construct a pipe as
to cool the smoke in passing through it, and thus meet the wishes of those
who are more fond of smoke than heat. This I effected by means of a reed,
which grows plentifully in that region; I made a passage through the reed
with a hot wire, polished it, and attached a clay pipe to the end, so that
the smoke should be cooled in flowing through the stem like whiskey or rum
in passing from the boiler through the worm of the still. These pipes I
sold at ten cents apiece. In the early part of the night I would sell my
tobacco and pipes, and manufacture them in the latter part. As the
Legislature sit in Raleigh every year, I sold these articles considerably
to the members, so that I became known not only in the city, but in many
parts of the State, as a _tobacconist_.
Perceiving that I was getting along so well, I began, slave as I was, to
think about taking a wife. So I fixed my mind upon Miss Lucy Williams, a
slave of Thomas Devereaux, Esq., an eminent lawyer in the place; but
failed in my undertaking. Then I thought I never would marry; but at the
end of two or three years my resolution began to slide away, till finding
I could not keep it longer I set out once more in pursuit of a wife. So I
fell in with her to whom I am now united, MISS MARTHA CURTIS, and the
bargain between _us_ was completed. I next went to her master, Mr. Boylan,
and asked him, according to the custom, if I might "marry his woman." His
reply was, "Yes, if you will behave yourself." I told him I would. "And
make her behave herself!" To this I also assented; and then proceeded to
ask the approbation of my master, which was granted. So in May, 1828, I
was bound as fast in wedlock as a slave can be. God may at any time sunder
that band in a freeman; either master may do the same at pleasure in a
slave. The bond is not recognized in law. But in my case it has never been
broken; and now it cannot be, except by a higher power.
When we had been married nine months and one day, we were blessed with a
son, and two years afterwards with a daughter. My wife also passed from
the hands of Mr. Boylan into those of MR. BENJAMIN B. SMITH, a merchant, a
member and class-leader in the Methodist church, and in much repute for
his deep piety and devotion to religion. But grace (of course) had not
wrought in the same _manner_ upon the heart of Mr. Smith, as nature had
done upon that of Mr. Boylan, who made no religious profession. This
latter gentleman used to give my wife, who was a favorite slave, (her
mother nursed every one of his own children,) sufficient food and clothing
to render her comfortable, so that I had to spend for her but little,
except to procure such small articles of extra comfort as I was prompted
to from time to time. Indeed Mr. Boylan was regarded as a very kind master
to all the slaves about him; that is, to his house servants; nor did he
inflict much cruelty upon his field hands, except by proxy. The overseer
on his nearest plantation (I know but little about the rest) was a very
cruel man; in one instance, as it was said among the slaves, he whipped a
man _to death_; but of course denied that the man died in consequence of
the whipping. Still it was the choice of my wife to pass into the hands of
Mr. Smith, as she had become attached to him in consequence of belonging
to the same church, and receiving his religious instruction and counsel as
her class-leader, and in consequence of the peculiar devotedness to the
cause of religion for which he was noted, and which he always seemed to
manifest.--But when she became his slave, he withheld both from her and
her children, the needful food and clothing, while he exacted from them to
the uttermost all the labor they were able to perform. Almost every
article of clothing worn either by my wife or children, especially every
article of much value, I had to purchase; while the food he furnished the
family amounted to less than a meal a day, and that of the coarser kind. I
have no remembrance that he ever gave us a blanket or any other article of
bedding, although it is considered a rule at the South that the master
shall furnish each of his slaves with one blanket a year. So that, both as
to food and clothing, I had in fact to support both my wife and the
children, while he claimed them as his property, and received all their
labor. She was house servant to Mr. Smith, sometimes cooked the food for
his family, and usually took it from the table, but her mistress was so
particular in giving it out to be cooked, or so watched it, that she
always knew whether it was all returned; and when the table was cleared
away, the stern old lady would sit by and see that every dish (except the
very little she would send into the kitchen) was put away, and then she
would turn the key upon it, so as to be sure her slaves should not die of
gluttony. This practice is common with some families in that region; but
with others it is not. It was not so in that of her less pious master, Mr.
Boylan, nor was it precisely so at my master's. We used to have corn bread
enough, and some meat. When I was a boy, the pot-liquor, in which the meat
was boiled for the "great house," together with some little corn-meal
balls that had been thrown in just before the meat was done, was poured
into a tray and set in the middle of the yard, and a clam shell or pewter
spoon given to each of us children, who would fall upon the delicious fare
as greedily as pigs. It was not generally so much as we wanted,
consequently it was customary for some of the white persons who saw us
from the piazza of the house where they were sitting, to order the more
stout and greedy ones to eat slower, that those more young and feeble
might have a chance. But it was not so with Mr. Smith: such luxuries were
more than he could afford, kind and Christian man as he was considered to
be. So that by the expense of providing for my wife and children, all the
money I had earned and could earn by my night labor was consumed, till I
found myself reduced to five dollars, and this I lost one day in going to
the plantation. My light of hope now went out. My prop seemed to have
given way from under me. Sunk in the very night of despair respecting my
freedom, I discovered myself, as though I had never known it before, a
husband, the father of two children, a family looking up to me for bread,
and I a slave, penniless, and well watched by my master, his wife and his
children, lest I should, perchance, catch the friendly light of the stars
to make something in order to supply the cravings of nature in those with
whom my soul was bound up; or lest some plan of freedom might lead me to
trim the light of diligence after the day's labor was over, while the rest
of the world were enjoying the hours in pleasure or sleep.
At this time an event occurred, which, while it cast a cloud over the
prospects of some of my fellow slaves, was a rainbow over mine. My master
died, and his widow, by the will, became sole executrix of his property.
To the surprize of all, the bank of which he had been cashier presented a
claim against the estate for forty thousand dollars. By a compromise,
this sum was reduced to twenty thousand dollars; and my mistress, to meet
the amount, sold some of her slaves, and hired out others. I hired my time
of her,[A] for which I paid her a price varying from one hundred dollars
to one hundred and twenty dollars per year. This was a privilege which
comparatively few slaves at the South enjoy; and in this I felt truly
blessed.
[Footnote A: It is contrary to the laws of the State for a slave to have
command of his own time in this way, but in Raleigh it is sometimes winked
at. I knew one slave-man who was _doing well for himself_, taken up by the
public authorities and hired out for the public good, three times in
succession for this offence. The time of hiring in such a case is one
year. The master is subject to a fine. But generally, as I have said, if
the slave is orderly and appears to be _making nothing_, neither he nor
the master is interfered with.]
I commenced the manufacture of pipes and tobacco on an enlarged scale. I
opened a regular place of business, labelled my tobacco in a conspicuous
manner with the names of "_Edward and Lunsford Lane_," and of some of the
persons who sold it for me,--established agencies for the sale in various
parts of the State, one at Fayetteville, one at Salisbury, one at Chapel
Hill, and so on,--sold my articles from my place of business, and about
town, also deposited them in stores on commission, and thus, after paying
my mistress for my time, and rendering such support as necessary to my
family, I found in the space of some six or eight years, that I had
collected the sum of one thousand dollars. During this time I had found it
politic to go shabbily dressed, and to appear to be very poor, but to pay
my mistress for my services promptly. I kept my money hid, never venturing
to put out a penny, nor to let any body but my wife know that I was making
any. The thousand dollars was what I supposed my mistress would ask for
me, and so I determined now what I would do.
I went to my mistress and inquired what was her price for me. She said a
thousand dollars. I then told her that I wanted to be free, and asked her
if she would sell me to be made free. She said she would; and accordingly
I arranged with her, and with the master of my wife, Mr. Smith, already
spoken of, for the latter to take my money[A] and buy of her my freedom,
as I could not legally purchase it, and as the laws forbid emancipation
except for "meritorious services." This done, Mr. Smith endeavored to
emancipate me formally, and to get my manumission recorded; I tried also;
but the court judged that I had done nothing "meritorious," and so I
remained, nominally only, the slave of Mr. Smith for a year; when, feeling
unsafe in that relation, I accompanied him to New York whither he was
going to purchase goods, and was there regularly and formally made a
freeman, and there my manumission was recorded. I returned to my family in
Raleigh and endeavored to do by them as a freeman should. I had known what
it was to be a slave, and I knew what it was to be free.
[Footnote A: _Legally_, my money belonged to my mistress; and she could
have taken it and refused to grant me my freedom. But she was a very kind
woman for a slave owner; and she would under the circumstances, scorn to
do such a thing. I have known of slaves, however, served in this way.]
But I am going too rapidly over my story. When the money was paid to my
mistress and the conveyance fairly made to Mr. Smith, I felt that I was
free. And a queer and a joyous feeling it is to one who has been a slave.
I cannot describe it, only it seemed as though I was in heaven. I used to
lie awake whole nights thinking of it. And oh, the strange thoughts that
passed through my soul, like so many rivers of light; deep and rich were
their waves as they rolled;--these were more to me than sleep, more than
soft slumber after long months of watching over the decaying, fading frame
of a friend, and the loved one laid to rest in the dust. But I cannot
describe my feelings to those who have never been slaves; then why should
I attempt it? He who has passed from spiritual death to life, and received
the witness within his soul that his sins are forgiven, may possibly form
some distant idea, like the ray of the setting sun from the far off
mountain top, of the emotions of an emancipated slave. That opens heaven.
To break the bonds of slavery, opens up at once both earth and heaven.
Neither can be truly seen by us while we are slaves.
And now will the reader take with me a brief review of the road I had
trodden. I cannot here dwell upon its dark shades, though some of these
were black as the pencillings of midnight, but upon the light that had
followed my path from my infancy up, and had at length conducted me quite
out of the deep abyss of bondage. There is a hymn opening with the
following stanza, which very much expresses my feelings:
"When all thy mercies, Oh my God,
My rising soul surveys,
Transported with the view, I'm lost
In wonder, love, and praise."
I had endured what a freeman would indeed call hard fare; but my lot, on
the whole, had been a favored one for a slave. It is known that there is a
wide difference in the situations of what are termed house servants, and
plantation hands. I, though sometimes employed upon the plantation,
belonged to the former, which is the favored class. My master, too, was
esteemed a kind and humane man; and altogether I fared quite differently
from many poor fellows whom it makes my blood run chill to think of,
confined to the plantation, with not enough of food and that little of the
coarsest kind, to satisfy the gnawings of hunger,--compelled oftentimes,
to hie away in the night-time, when worn down with work, and _steal_, (if
it be stealing,) and privately devour such things as they can lay their
hands upon,--made to feel the rigors of bondage with no cessation,--torn
away sometimes from the few friends they love, friends doubly dear because
they are few, and transported to a climate where in a few hard years they
die,--or at best conducted heavily and sadly to their resting place under
the sod, upon their old master's plantation,--sometimes, perhaps,
enlivening the air with merriment, but a forced merriment, that comes from
a stagnant or a stupified heart. Such as this is the fate of the
plantation slaves generally, but such was not my lot. My way was
comparatively light, and what is better, it conducted to freedom. And my
wife and children were with me. After my master died, my mistress sold a
number of her slaves from their families and friends--but not me. She sold
several children from their parents--but my children were with me still.
She sold two husbands from their wives--but I was still with mine. She
sold one wife from her husband--but mine had not been sold from me. The
master of my wife, Mr. Smith, had separated members of families by
sale--but not of mine. With me and my house, the tenderer tendrils of the
heart still clung to where the vine had entwined; pleasant was its shade
and delicious its fruit to our taste, though we knew, and what is more, we
_felt_ that we were slaves. But all around I could see where the vine had
been torn down, and its bleeding branches told of vanished joys, and of
new wrought sorrows, such as, slave though I was, had never entered into
my practical experience.
I had never been permitted to learn to read; but I used to attend church,
and there I received instruction which I trust was of some benefit to me.
I trusted, too, that I had experienced the renewing influences of the
gospel; and after obtaining from my mistress a written _permit_, (a thing
_always_ required in such a case,) I had been baptised and received into
fellowship with the Baptist denomination. So that in religious matters, I
had been indulged in the exercise of my own conscience--a favor not always
granted to slaves. Indeed I, with others, was often told by the minister
how good God was in bringing us over to this country from dark and
benighted Africa, and permitting us to listen to the sound of the gospel.
To me, God also granted temporal freedom, which _man_ without God's
consent, had stolen away.
I often heard select portions of the scriptures read. And on the Sabbath
there was one sermon preached expressly for the colored people which it
was generally my privilege to hear. I became quite familiar with the
texts, "Servants be obedient to your masters."--"Not with eye service as
men pleasers."--"He that knoweth his master's will and doeth it not, shall
be beaten with many stripes," and others of this class: for they formed
the basis of most of these public instructions to us. The first
commandment impressed upon our minds was to obey our masters, and the
second was like unto it, namely, to do as much work when they or the
overseers were not watching us as when they were. But connected with these
instructions there was more or less that was truly excellent; though mixed
up with much that would sound strangely in the ears of freedom. There was
one very kind hearted Episcopal minister whom I often used to hear; he was
very popular with the colored people. But after he had preached a sermon
to us in which he argued from the Bible that it was the will of heaven
from all eternity we should be slaves, and our masters be our owners, most
of us left him; for like some of the faint hearted disciples in early
times we said,--"This is a hard saying, who can bear it?"
My manumission, as I shall call it; that is, the bill of sale conveying me
to Mr. Smith, was dated Sept. 9th, 1835. I continued in the tobacco and
pipe business as already described, to which I added a small trade in a
variety of articles; and some two years before I left Raleigh, I entered
also into a considerable business in wood, which I used to purchase by the
acre standing, cut it, haul it into the city, deposit it in a yard and
sell it out as I advantageously could. Also I was employed about the
office of the Governor as I shall hereafter relate. I used to keep one or
two horses, and various vehicles, by which I did a variety of work at
hauling about town. Of course I had to hire more or less help, to carry on
my business.
In the manufacture of tobacco I met with considerable competition, but
none that materially injured me. The method of preparing it having
originated with me and my father, we found it necessary, in order to
secure the advantage of the invention, to keep it to ourselves, and
decline, though often solicited, going into partnership with others. Those
who undertook the manufacture could neither give the article a flavor so
pleasant as ours, nor manufacture it so cheaply, so they either failed in
it, or succeeded but poorly.
Not long after obtaining my own freedom, I began seriously to think about
purchasing the freedom of my family. The first proposition was that I
should buy my wife, and that we should jointly labor to obtain the freedom
of the children afterwards as we were able. But that idea was abandoned,
when her master, Mr. Smith, refused to sell her to me for less than one
thousand dollars, a sum which then appeared too much for me to raise.
Afterwards, however, I conceived the idea of purchasing at once the entire
family. I went to Mr. Smith to learn his price, which he put at _three
thousand dollars_ for my wife and six children, the number we then had.
This seemed a large sum, both because it was a great deal for me to raise;
and also because Mr. Smith, when he bought my wife and _two_ children, had
actually paid but five hundred and sixty dollars for them, and had
received, ever since, their labor, while I had almost entirely supported
them, both as to food and clothing. Altogether, therefore, the case seemed
a hard one, but as I was entirely in his power I must do the best I could.
At length he concluded, perhaps partly of his own motion, and partly
through the persuasion of a friend, to sell the family for $2,500, as I
wished to free them, though he contended still that they were worth three
thousand dollars. Perhaps they would at that time have brought this larger
sum, if sold for the Southern market. The arrangement with Mr. Smith was
made in December, 1838. I gave him five notes of five hundred dollars
each, the first due in January, 1840, and one in January each succeeding
year; for which he transferred my family into my own possession, with a
_bond_ to give me a bill of sale when I should pay the notes. With this
arrangement, we found ourselves living in our own house--a house which I
had previously purchased--in January, 1839.
After moving my family, my wife was for a short time sick, in consequence
of her labor and the excitement in moving, and her excessive joy. I told
her that it reminded me of a poor shoemaker in the neighborhood who
purchased a ticket in a lottery; but not expecting to draw, the fact of
his purchasing it had passed out of his mind. But one day as he was at
work on his last, he was informed that his ticket had drawn the liberal
prize of ten thousand dollars; and the poor man was so overjoyed, that he
fell back on his seat, and immediately expired.
In this new and joyful situation, we found ourselves getting along very
well, until September, 1840, when to my surprise, as I was passing the
street one day, engaged in my business, the following note was handed me.
"Read it," said the officer, "or if you cannot read, get some white man to
read it to you." Here it is, _verbatim_:
_To Lunsford Lane, a free man of Colour_
Take notice that whereas complaint has been made to us two Justices of
the Peace for the county of Wake and state of North Carolina that you
are a free negro from another state who has migrated into this state
contrary to the provisions of the act of assembly concerning free
negros and mulattoes now notice is given you that unless you leave and
remove out of this state within twenty days that you will be proceeded
against for the penalty porscribed by said act of assembly and be
otherwise dealt with as the law directs given under our hands and seals
this the 5th Sept 1840