‘No, no,’ I said, and my voice sounded unnatural and shaky and
I could not control it. ‘I know all that; I know it would be
wrong. Please don’t let us talk about it any more.’
Walter looked hurt and puzzled with me, and I could not explain.
That night I could not go to sleep for a long time, and when
I did, I dreamt of Hugo being blinded.
Mrs. Sebright was very kind to me. She seemed to like me much
better when I was ill and silly; some people are like that; they
do like anyone better who is ill; and the Doctor was kind, the
Doctor Chilcote whom I had had before. She said I must go away
for change when I got up, and I said I couldn’t, I could not
leave Walter and the house, I said; but she arranged it all.
I was to go with the children to Cousin Delia, to Yearsly, where
I had not been for over a year; and Mrs. Sebright would stay
with Walter, and the nurse would go with me for a week.
I was glad to have it arranged; I tried to look forward to it,
but it did not seem real to me somehow; and when the nurse went
away after that first week?
What would I do then, I wondered.