Boys and men are great cowards. There is hardly any accusation that an
Englishman or boy resents so much as to be called a coward. Still I
venture to make the accusation, and will try and make good my words. I
do not mean that you are cowards in the sense of being afraid to attempt
any act of daring. You have pluck enough to tackle a fellow half as big
again as yourself, pluck enough to endure pain without a word, pluck
enough to risk your life to save another, but too often you have not
pluck enough to say no, or to brave a laugh. That is what I mean by
saying that men and boys are cowards. You will let the worst fellow of
the lot be the leader and give the tone to conversation because you have
not the pluck to say boldly that it is wrong, and that you will not join
in it. This want of moral courage makes a lad give up little by little
his hold on what is right. Sunday school, Church-going, prayers given up
because Jem chaffs so about them. If he chooses to neglect them that is
his look out. You have as much right to your opinion as he has to his.
Why should you let him show more courage in doing wrong than you in doing
right. Are you afraid of him? No. Well then, stick to your duty.
I said just now that going to work throws you in with a different set of
companions. Here, specially, comes the test of your courage. Are you
going to follow bad leaders, or have you the courage of your own
opinions. There is one particular subject where courage is most needed,
and where it most often fails. A young lad naturally wants to seem to be
manly--has a sort of feeling that he would like to show that he is not
just a little boy and bound to do as he is told. He is tempted to show
his manliness by neglect of home commands, rough and rude manners, bad
language and bad talk. I have remarked before how home obedience and
true manliness go together; here I want to speak more particularly about
bad language and bad talking, and the evil it leads to. S. Paul speaks
about it very plainly when he says, speaking of the things that should
not be named amongst Christians, "neither filthiness nor foolish talking
nor jesting, which are not convenient." Now, boys, all indecent words
and conversations are wrong--they are sinful, unmanly, degrading. I know
you cannot help hearing much that is wrong. Shame, be it said, to the
men of England--yes, men who talk of advancement and freedom, men who are
fathers of families, that they too often make or allow the talk of the
workshop to be such that no boy can work there without hearing words and
jokes which are not fit, I do not say for Christians to hear, but not fit
to be spoken. Hearing words of evil you often cannot help. To join in
them you can and must refuse, and unless you do so refuse you are a
coward and false to your profession. I do not speak here of actual deeds
of sin--no one can do or join in an impure deed without knowing that he
is sinning, but many think that there is no great harm in listening to
and laughing at what others say. Be warned in time, it is but a very
little step from laughing at to joining in bad conversation, and a very
small step from words to action. The same want of courage that joins in
the laugh will make it difficult to say no when tempted further. Never,
with companions of your own sex, and still more with those of the
opposite sex, let any corrupt communications proceed out of your mouth.
If it is necessary for you to speak upon such subjects ask advice of
those older than yourself, and not of companions of your own age. You
know lads that you love your mother and care for your sisters. You would
be furious if anyone spoke to or of them as you sometimes hear women
spoken of. What would be an insult to them is an insult to any woman.
Stand up for the honour and respect due to others as you would for your
own mother or sister. You would not talk like that before your mother.
Make it a rule never to do or say anything that you would be ashamed to
say in her presence, or in the presence of anyone you respect. Courage
is what you want here and plenty of it, but if you will only make a stand
for the right, strength, not your own, will be given you. I can tell you
of one who did so try and do the same. Bishop Pattison, who died some
years ago, when he was fearlessly doing his duty in the islands of the
Pacific, was, once a boy, face to face with this difficulty. He was in
the cricket eleven of his school--a good player and very fond of the
game. It had become the custom at cricket suppers for bad talk to be
indulged in. Pattison one evening rose up at the table and said, "If
this conversation is to be allowed I must leave the eleven. I cannot
share in this conversation--if you determine to continue it I shall have
no choice but to go." They did not want to lose him, and the foul
conversation was stopped.