from Leipzig, this remark, among others, could not escape me,--that,
from the very beginning of my academical course, I had esteemed myself
very clever and wise, since, as soon as I had learned any thing, I put
myself in the place of the professor, and so became didactic on the
spot. I was amused to see how I had immediately applied to my sister
whatever Gellert had imparted or advised in his lectures, without
seeing, that, both in life and in books, a thing may be proper for a
young man without being suitable for a young lady; and we both together
made merry over these mimicries. The poems also which I had composed in
Leipzig were already too poor for me; and they seemed to me cold, dry,
and, in respect of all that was meant to express the state of the human
heart or mind, too superficial. This induced me, now that I was to leave
my father's house once more, and go to a second university, again to
decree a great high /auto-da-fé/ against my labors. Several
commenced plays, some of which had reached the third or the fourth act,
while others had only the plot fully made out, together with many other
poems, letters, and papers, were given over to the fire: and scarcely
any thing was spared except the manuscript by Behrisch, "Die Laune des
Verliebten" and "Die Mitschuldigen," which latter play I constantly went
on improving with peculiar affection; and, as the piece was already
complete, I again worked over the plot, to make it more bustling and
intelligible. Lessing, in the first two acts of his "Minna," had set up
an unattainable model of the way in which a drama should be developed;
and nothing was to me of greater importance than to thoroughly enter
into his meaning and views.
The recital of whatever moved, excited, and occupied me at this time, is
already circumstantial enough; but I must nevertheless recur to that
interest with which supersensuous things had inspired me, of which I,
once for all, so far as might be possible, undertook to form some
notion.
I experienced a great influence from an important work that fell into my
hands: it was Arnold's "History of the Church and of Heretics." This man
is not merely a reflective historian, but at the same time pious and
feeling. His sentiments chimed in very well with mine; and what
particularly delighted me in his work was, that I received a more
favorable notion of many heretics, who had been hitherto represented to
me as mad or impious. The spirit of contradiction and the love of
paradoxes are inherent in us all. I diligently studied the different
opinions: and as I had often enough heard it said that every man has his
own religion at last, so nothing seemed more natural to me than that I
should form mine too; and this I did with much satisfaction. The Neo-
Platonism lay at the foundation; the hermetical, the mystical, the
cabalistic, also contributed their share; and thus I built for myself a
world that looked strange enough.
I could well represent to myself a Godhead which has gone on producing
itself from all eternity; but, as production cannot be conceived without
multiplicity, so it must of necessity have immediately appeared to
itself as a Second, which we recognize under the name of the Son: now,
these two must continue the act of producing, and again appear to
themselves in a Third, which was just as substantial, living, and
eternal as the Whole. With these, however, the circle of the Godhead was
complete; and it would not have been possible for them to produce
another perfectly equal to them. But, since the work of production
always proceeded, they created a fourth, which already fostered in
himself a contradiction, inasmuch as it was, like them, unlimited, and
yet at the same time was to be contained in them and bounded by them.
Now, this was Lucifer, to whom the whole power of creation was committed
from this time, and from whom all other beings were to proceed. He
immediately displayed his infinite activity by creating the whole body
of angels,--all, again, after his own likeness, unlimited, but contained
in him and bounded by him. Surrounded by such a glory, he forgot his
higher origin, and believed that he could find himself in himself; and
from this first ingratitude sprang all that does not seem to us in
accordance with the will and purposes of the Godhead. Now, the more he
concentrated himself within himself, the more painful must it have
become to him, as well as to all the spirits whose sweet uprising to
their origin he had embittered. And so that happened which is intimated
to us under the form of the Fall of the Angels. One part of them
concentrated itself with Lucifer, the other turned itself again to its
origin. From this concentration of the whole creation--for it had
proceeded out of Lucifer, and was forced to follow him--sprang all that
we perceive under the form of matter, which we figure to ourselves as
heavy, solid, and dark, but which, since it is descended, if not even
immediately, yet by filiation, from the Divine Being, is just as
unlimited, powerful, and eternal as its sire and grandsire. Now, the
whole mischief, if we may call it so, having arisen merely through the
one-sided direction of Lucifer, the better half was indeed wanting to
this creation; for it possessed all that is gained by concentration,
while it lacked all that can be effected by expansion alone: and so the
entire creation might have been destroyed by everlasting concentration,
become annihilated with its father Lucifer, and have lost all its claims
to an equal eternity with the Godhead. This condition the Elohim
contemplated for a time: and they had their choice, to wait for those
eons, in which the field would again have become clear, and space would
be left them for a new creation; or, if they would, to seize upon that
which existed already, and supply the want, according to their own
eternity. Now, they chose the latter, and by their mere will supplied in
an instant the whole want which the consequence of Lucifer's undertaking
drew after it. They gave to the Eternal Being the faculty of expansion,
of moving towards them: the peculiar pulse of life was again restored,
and Lucifer himself could not avoid its effects. This is the epoch when
that appeared which we know as light, and when that began which we are
accustomed to designate by the word creation. However much this
multiplied itself by progressive degrees, through the continually
working vital power of the Elohim, still a being was wanting who might
be able to restore the original connection with the Godhead: and thus
man was produced, who in all things was to be similar, yea, equal to the
Godhead, but thereby, in effect, found himself once more in the
situation of Lucifer, that of being at once unlimited and limited; and
since this contradiction was to manifest itself in him through all the
categories of existence, and a perfect consciousness, as well as a
decided will, was to accompany his various conditions, it was to be
foreseen that he must be at the same time the most perfect and the most
imperfect, the most happy and the most unhappy, creature. It was not
long before he, too, completely acted the part of Lucifer. True
ingratitude is the separation from the benefactor; and thus that fall
was manifest for the second time, although the whole creation is nothing
and was nothing but a falling from and returning to the original.
One easily sees how the Redemption is not only decreed from eternity,
but is considered as eternally necessary,--nay, that it must ever renew
itself through the whole time of generation [Footnote: "Das Werden," the
state of becoming, as distinguished from that of being. The word, which
is most useful to the Germans, can never be rendered properly in
English.--TRANS.] and existence. In this view of the subject, nothing is
more natural than for the Divinity himself to take the form of man,
which had already prepared itself as a veil, and to share his fate for a
short time, in order, by this assimilation, to enhance his joys and
alleviate his sorrows. The history of all religions and philosophies
teaches us, that this great truth, indispensable to man, has been handed
down by different nations, in different times, in various ways, and even
in strange fables and images, in accordance with their limited
knowledge: enough, if it only be acknowledged that we find ourselves in
a condition which, even if it seems to drag us down and oppress us, yet
gives us opportunity, nay, even makes it our duty, to raise ourselves
up, and to fulfil the purposes of the Godhead in this manner, that,
while we are compelled on the one hand to concentrate ourselves (/uns
zu verselbsten/), we, on the other hand, do not omit to expand
ourselves (/uns zu entselbstigen/) in regular pulsation. [Footnote:
If we could make use of some such verbs as "inself" and "unself," we
should more accurately render this passage.--TRANS.]
NINTH BOOK.
"The heart is often affected, moreover, to the advantage of different,
but especially of social and refined, virtues; and the more tender
sentiments are excited and unfolded in it. Many touches, in particular,
will impress themselves, which give the young reader an insight into the
more hidden corner of the human heart and its passions,--a knowledge
which is more worth than all Latin and Greek, and of which Ovid was a
very excellent master. But yet it is not on this account that the
classic poets, and therefore Ovid, are placed in the hands of youth. We
have received from a kind Creator a variety of mental powers, to which
we must not neglect giving their proper culture in our earliest years,
and which cannot be cultivated, either by logic or metaphysics, Latin or
Greek. We have an imagination, before which, since it should not seize
upon the very first conceptions that chance to present themselves, we
ought to place the fittest and most beautiful images, and thus accustom
and practise the mind to recognize and love the beautiful everywhere,
and in nature itself, under its determined, true, and also in its finer,
features. A multitude of conceptions and general knowledge is necessary
to us, as well for the sciences as for daily life, which can be learned
out of no compendium. Our feelings, affections, and passions should be
advantageously developed and purified."
This significant passage, which is found in "The Universal German
Library," was not the only one of its kind. Similar principles and
similar views manifested themselves in many directions. They made upon
us lively youths a very great impression, which had the more decided
effect, as it was strengthened besides by Wieland's example; for the
works of his second brilliant period clearly showed that he had formed
himself according to such maxims. And what more could we desire?
Philosophy, with its abstruse questions, was set aside; the classic
languages, the acquisition of which is accompanied by so much drudgery,
one saw thrust into the background; the compendiums, about the
sufficiency of which Hamlet had already whispered a word of caution into
our ears, came more and more into suspicion. We were directed to the
contemplation of an active life, which we were so fond of leading; and
to the knowledge of the passions, which we partly felt, partly
anticipated, in our own bosoms, and which, if though they had been
rebuked formerly, now appeared to us as something important and
dignified, because they were to be the chief object of our studies; and
the knowledge of them was extolled as the most excellent means of
cultivating our mental powers. Besides, such a mode of thought was quite
in accordance with my own conviction,--nay, with my poetical mode of
treatment. I therefore, without opposition, after I had thwarted so many
good designs, and seen so many fair hopes vanish, reconciled myself to
my father's intention of sending me to Strasburg, where I was promised a
cheerful, gay life, while I should prosecute my studies, and at last
take my degree.
In spring I felt my health, but still more my youthful spirits,
restored, and once more longed to be out of my father's house, though
with reasons far different from those on the first time. The pretty
chambers and spots where I had suffered so much had become disagreeable
to me, and with my father himself there could be no pleasant relation. I
could not quite pardon him for having manifested more impatience than
was reasonable at the relapse of my disease, and at my tedious recovery;
nay, for having, instead of comforting me by forbearance, frequently
expressed himself in a cruel manner, about that which lay in no man's
hand, as if it depended only on the will. And he, too, was in various
ways hurt and offended by me.
For young people bring back from the university general ideas, which,
indeed, is quite right and good; but, because they fancy themselves very
wise in this, they apply them as a standard to the objects that occur,
which must then, for the most part, lose by the comparison. Thus I had
gained a general notion of architecture, and of the arrangement and
decoration of houses, and imprudently, in conversation, had applied this
to our own house. My father had designed the whole arrangement of it,
and carried out its construction with great perseverance; and,
considering that it was to be exclusively a residence for himself and
his family, nothing could be objected to it: in this taste, also, very
many of the houses in Frankfort were built. An open staircase ran up
through the house, and touched upon large ante-rooms, which might very
well have been chambers themselves, as, indeed, we always passed the
fine season in them. But this pleasant, cheerful existence for a single
family--this communication from above to below--became the greatest
inconvenience as soon as several parties occupied the house, as we had
but too well experienced on the occasion of the French quartering. For
that painful scene with the king's lieutenant would not have happened,
nay, my father would even have felt all those disagreeable matters less,
if, after the Leipzig fashion, our staircase had run close along the
side of the house, and a separate door had been given to each story.
This style of building I once praised highly for its advantages, and
showed my father the possibility of altering his staircase also; whereat
he got into an incredible passion, which was the more violent as, a
short time before, I had found fault with some scrolled looking-glass
frames, and rejected certain Chinese hangings. A scene ensued, which,
indeed, was again hushed up and smothered; but it hastened my journey to
the beautiful Alsace, which I accomplished in a newly contrived
comfortable diligence, without delay, and in a short time.
I had alighted at the Ghost (/Geist/) tavern, and hastened at once
to satisfy my most earnest desire and to approach the minster, which had
long since been pointed out to me by fellow-travellers, and had been
before my eyes for a great distance. When I first perceived this
Colossus through the narrow lanes, and then stood too near before it, in
the truly confined little square, it made upon me an impression quite of
its own kind, which I, being unable to analyze on the spot, carried with
me only indistinctly for this time, as I hastily ascended the building,
so as not to neglect the beautiful moment of a high and cheerful sun,
which was to disclose to me at once the broad, rich land.
And now, from the platform, I saw before me the beautiful country in
which I should for a long time live and reside: the handsome city; the
wide-spreading meadows around it, thickly set and interwoven with
magnificent trees; that striking richness of vegetation which follows in
the windings of the Rhine, marks its banks, islands, and aits. Nor is
the level ground, stretching down from the south, and watered by the
Iller, less adorned with varied green. Even westward, towards the
mountains, there are many low grounds, which afford quite as charming a
view of wood and meadow-growth, just as the northern and more hilly part
is intersected by innumerable little brooks, which promote a rapid
vegetation everywhere. If one imagines, between these luxuriantly
outstretched meads, between these joyously scattered groves, all land
adapted for tillage, excellently prepared, verdant, and ripening, and
the best and richest spots marked by hamlets and farmhouses, and this
great and immeasurable plain, prepared for man, like a new paradise,
bounded far and near by mountains partly cultivated, partly overgrown
with woods, he will then conceive the rapture with which I blessed my
fate, that it had destined me, for some time, so beautiful a dwelling-
place.
Such a fresh glance into a new land in which we are to abide for a time,
has still the peculiarity, both pleasant and foreboding, that the whole
lies before us like an unwritten tablet. As yet no sorrows and joys
which relate to ourselves are recorded upon it; this cheerful, varied,
animated plain is still mute for us; the eye is only fixed on the
objects so far as they are intrinsically important, and neither
affection nor passion has especially to render prominent this or that
spot. But a presentiment of the future already disquiets the young
heart; and an unsatisfied craving secretly demands that which is to come
and may come, and which at all events, whether for good or ill, will
imperceptibly assume the character of the spot in which we find
ourselves.
Having descended the height, I still tarried a while before the face of
the venerable pile; but what I could not quite clearly make out, either
the first or the following time, was, that I regarded this miracle as a
monster, which must have terrified me, if it had not, at the same time,
appeared to me comprehensible by its regularity, and even pleasing in
its finish. Yet I by no means busied myself with meditating on this
contradiction, but suffered a monument so astonishing quietly to work
upon me by its presence.
I took small, but well-situated and pleasant, lodgings, on the north
side of the Fish-market, a fine, long street, where the everlasting
motion came to the assistance of every unoccupied moment. I then
delivered my letters of introduction, and found among my patrons a
merchant, who, with his family, was devoted to those pious opinions
sufficiently known to me, although, as far as regarded external worship,
he had not separated from the Church. He was a man of intelligence
withal, and by no means hypocritical in his conduct. The company of
boarders which was recommended to me, and, indeed, I to it, was very
agreeable and entertaining. A couple of old maids had long kept up this
boarding-house with regularity and good success: there might have been
about ten persons, older and younger. Of these latter, one named Meyer,
a native of Lindau, is most vividly present to my mind. From his form
and face he might have been considered one of the handsomest of men, if,
at the same time, he had not had something of the sloven in his whole
appearance. In like manner his splendid natural talents were marred by
an incredible levity, and his excellent temper by an unbounded
dissoluteness. He had an open, jovial face, rather more round than oval:
the organs of the senses, the eyes, nose, mouth, and ears, could be
called rich; they showed a decided fulness, without being too large. His
mouth was particularly charming, owing to his curling lips; and his
whole physiognomy had the peculiar expression of a rake, from the
circumstance that his eyebrows met across his nose, which, in a handsome
face, always produces a pleasant expression of sensuality. By his
jovialness, sincerity, and good nature, he made himself beloved by all.
His memory was incredible; attention at the lectures was no effort for
him; he retained all he heard, and was intellectual enough to take an
interest in every thing, and this the more easily, as he was studying
medicine. All his impressions remained vivid; and his waggery in
repeating the lectures and mimicking the professors often went so far,
that, when he had heard three different lectures in one morning, he
would, at the dinner-table, interchange the professors with each other,
paragraphwise, and often even more abruptly, which motley lecture
frequently entertained us, but often, too, became troublesome.
The rest were more or less polite, steady, serious people. A pensioned
knight of the order of St. Louis was one of these: but the majority were
students, all really good and well-disposed; only they were not allowed
to go beyond their usual allowance of wine. That this should not be
easily done was the care of our president, one Doctor Salzmann. Already
in the sixties and unmarried, he had attended this dinner-table for many
years, and maintained its good order and respectability. He possessed a
handsome property, kept himself close and neat in his exterior, even
belonging to those who always go in shoes and stockings, and with their
hat under their arm. To put on the hat was with him an extraordinary
action. He commonly carried an umbrella, wisely reflecting that the
finest summer-days often bring thunder-storms and passing showers over
the country.
With this man I talked over my design of continuing to study
jurisprudence at Strasburg, so as to be able to take my degree as soon
as possible. Since he was exactly informed of every thing, I asked him
about the lectures I should have to hear, and what he generally thought
of the matter. To this he replied, that it was not in Strasburg as in
the German universities, where they try to educate jurists in the large
and learned sense of the term. Here, in conformity with the relation
towards France, all was really directed to the practical, and managed in
accordance with the opinions of the French, who readily stop at what is
given. They tried to impart to every one certain general principles and
preliminary knowledge, they compressed as much as possible, and
communicated only what was most necessary. Hereupon he made me
acquainted with a man, in whom, as a /repetent/, [Footnote: A
repetent is one of a class of persons to be found in the German
universities, and who assist students in their studies. They are
somewhat analogous to the English tutors, but not precisely: for the
latter render their aid /before/ the recitation; while the repetent
/repeats/ with the student, in private, the lectures he has
previously heard from the professor. Hence his name, which might be
rendered /repeater/, had we any corresponding class of men in
England or America, which would justify an English word.--/American
Note/.] great confidence was entertained; which he very soon managed
to gain from me also. By way of introduction, I began to speak with him
on subjects of jurisprudence; and he wondered not a little at my
swaggering: for, during my residence at Leipzig, I had gained more of an
insight into the requisites for the law than I have hitherto taken
occasion to state in my narrative, though all I had acquired could only
be reckoned as a general encyclopedical survey, and not as proper
definite knowledge. University life, even if in the course of it we may
not exactly have to boast of industry, nevertheless affords endless
advantages in every kind of cultivation, because we are always
surrounded by men who either possess or are seeking science, so that,
even if unconsciously, we are constantly drawing some nourishment from
such an atmosphere.
My repetent, after he had had patience with my rambling discourse for
some time, gave me at last to understand that I must first of all keep
my immediate object in view, which was, to be examined, to take my
degree, and then, perchance, to commence practice. "Regarding the
former," said he, "the subject is by no means investigated at large. It
is inquired how and when a law arose, and what gave the internal or
external occasion for it: there is no inquiry as to how it has been
altered by time and custom, or how far it has perhaps been perverted by
false interpretation or the perverted usage of the courts. It is in such
investigations that learned men quite peculiarly spend their lives,
whereas we inquire into that which exists at present: this we stamp
firmly on our memory, that it may always be ready when we wish to employ
it for the use and defence of our clients. Thus we qualify our young
people for their future life, and the rest follows in proportion to
their talents and activity." Hereupon he handed me his pamphlets, which
were written in question and answer, and in which I could have stood a
pretty good examination at once; for Hopp's smaller law-catechism was
yet perfectly in my memory: the rest I supplied with some diligence,
and, against my will, qualified myself in the easiest manner as a
candidate.
But since in this way all my own activity in the study was cut off,--for
I had no sense for any thing positive, but wished to have every thing
explained historically, if not intelligibly,--I found for my powers a
wider field, which I employed in the most singular manner by devoting
myself to a matter of interest which was accidentally presented to me
from without.