YOU KNOW ME AL
RING W. LARDNER
YOU KNOW ME
AL
_A Busher's Letters_
BY
RING W. LARDNER
[Illustration]
NEW YORK
GEORGE H. DORAN COMPANY
Copyright, 1916,
BY GEORGE H. DORAN COMPANY
PRINTED IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA
COPYRIGHT, 1914, BY THE CURTIS PUBLISHING COMPANY
CONTENTS
CHAPTER PAGE
I A BUSHER'S LETTERS HOME 9
II THE BUSHER COMES BACK 45
III THE BUSHER'S HONEYMOON 83
IV A NEW BUSHER BREAKS IN 122
V THE BUSHER'S KID 166
VI THE BUSHER BEATS IT HENCE 208
YOU KNOW ME AL
YOU KNOW ME AL
CHAPTER I
A BUSHER'S LETTERS HOME
_Terre Haute, Indiana, September 6._
FRIEND AL: Well, Al old pal I suppose you seen in the paper where I
been sold to the White Sox. Believe me Al it comes as a surprise to
me and I bet it did to all you good old pals down home. You could of
knocked me over with a feather when the old man come up to me and says
Jack I've sold you to the Chicago Americans.
I didn't have no idea that anything like that was coming off. For five
minutes I was just dum and couldn't say a word.
He says We aren't getting what you are worth but I want you to go up to
that big league and show those birds that there is a Central League
on the map. He says Go and pitch the ball you been pitching down here
and there won't be nothing to it. He says All you need is the nerve and
Walsh or no one else won't have nothing on you.
So I says I would do the best I could and I thanked him for the
treatment I got in Terre Haute. They always was good to me here
and though I did more than my share I always felt that my work was
appresiated. We are finishing second and I done most of it. I can't
help but be proud of my first year's record in professional baseball
and you know I am not boasting when I say that Al.
Well Al it will seem funny to be up there in the big show when I never
was really in a big city before. But I guess I seen enough of life not
to be scared of the high buildings eh Al?
I will just give them what I got and if they don't like it they can
send me back to the old Central and I will be perfectly satisfied.
I didn't know anybody was looking me over, but one of the boys told me
that Jack Doyle the White Sox scout was down here looking at me when
Grand Rapids was here. I beat them twice in that serious. You know
Grand Rapids never had a chance with me when I was right. I shut them
out in the first game and they got one run in the second on account of
Flynn misjuging that fly ball. Anyway Doyle liked my work and he wired
Comiskey to buy me. Comiskey come back with an offer and they excepted
it. I don't know how much they got but anyway I am sold to the big
league and believe me Al I will make good.
Well Al I will be home in a few days and we will have some of the good
old times. Regards to all the boys and tell them I am still their pal
and not all swelled up over this big league business.
Your pal, JACK.
_Chicago, Illinois, December 14._
Old Pal: Well Al I have not got much to tell you. As you know Comiskey
wrote me that if I was up in Chi this month to drop in and see him. So
I got here Thursday morning and went to his office in the afternoon.
His office is out to the ball park and believe me its some park and
some office.
I went in and asked for Comiskey and a young fellow says He is not here
now but can I do anything for you? I told him who I am and says I had
an engagement to see Comiskey. He says The boss is out of town hunting
and did I have to see him personally?
I says I wanted to see about signing a contract. He told me I could
sign as well with him as Comiskey and he took me into another office.
He says What salary did you think you ought to get? and I says I
wouldn't think of playing ball in the big league for less than three
thousand dollars per annum. He laughed and says You don't want much.
You better stick round town till the boss comes back. So here I am and
it is costing me a dollar a day to stay at the hotel on Cottage Grove
Avenue and that don't include my meals.
I generally eat at some of the cafes round the hotel but I had supper
downtown last night and it cost me fifty-five cents. If Comiskey don't
come back soon I won't have no more money left.
Speaking of money I won't sign no contract unless I get the salary you
and I talked of, three thousand dollars. You know what I was getting in
Terre Haute, a hundred and fifty a month, and I know it's going to cost
me a lot more to live here. I made inquiries round here and find I can
get board and room for eight dollars a week but I will be out of town
half the time and will have to pay for my room when I am away or look
up a new one when I come back. Then I will have to buy cloths to wear
on the road in places like New York. When Comiskey comes back I will
name him three thousand dollars as my lowest figure and I guess he
will come through when he sees I am in ernest. I heard that Walsh was
getting twice as much as that.
The papers says Comiskey will be back here sometime to-morrow. He
has been hunting with the president of the league so he ought to
feel pretty good. But I don't care how he feels. I am going to get a
contract for three thousand and if he don't want to give it to me he
can do the other thing. You know me Al.
Yours truly, JACK.
_Chicago, Illinois, December 16._
DEAR FRIEND AL: Well I will be home in a couple of days now but I
wanted to write you and let you know how I come out with Comiskey. I
signed my contract yesterday afternoon. He is a great old fellow Al
and no wonder everybody likes him. He says Young man will you have
a drink? But I was to smart and wouldn't take nothing. He says You
was with Terre Haute? I says Yes I was. He says Doyle tells me you
were pretty wild. I says Oh no I got good control. He says Well do
you want to sign? I says Yes if I get my figure. He asks What is my
figure and I says three thousand dollars per annum. He says Don't you
want the office furniture too? Then he says I thought you was a young
ball-player and I didn't know you wanted to buy my park.
We kidded each other back and forth like that a while and then he says
You better go out and get the air and come back when you feel better.
I says I feel O.K. now and I want to sign a contract because I have
got to get back to Bedford. Then he calls the secretary and tells him
to make out my contract. He give it to me and it calls for two hundred
and fifty a month. He says You know we always have a city serious here
in the fall where a fellow picks up a good bunch of money. I hadn't
thought of that so I signed up. My yearly salary will be fifteen
hundred dollars besides what the city serious brings me. And that is
only for the first year. I will demand three thousand or four thousand
dollars next year.
I would of started home on the evening train but I ordered a suit of
cloths from a tailor over on Cottage Grove and it won't be done till
to-morrow. It's going to cost me twenty bucks but it ought to last a
long time. Regards to Frank and the bunch.
Your Pal, JACK.
_Paso Robles, California, March 2._
OLD PAL AL: Well Al we been in this little berg now a couple of days
and its bright and warm all the time just like June. Seems funny to
have it so warm this early in March but I guess this California climate
is all they said about it and then some.
It would take me a week to tell you about our trip out here. We came on
a Special Train De Lukes and it was some train. Every place we stopped
there was crowds down to the station to see us go through and all the
people looked me over like I was a actor or something. I guess my hight
and shoulders attracted their attention. Well Al we finally got to
Oakland which is across part of the ocean from Frisco. We will be back
there later on for practice games.
We stayed in Oakland a few hours and then took a train for here. It
was another night in a sleeper and believe me I was tired of sleepers
before we got here. I have road one night at a time but this was four
straight nights. You know Al I am not built right for a sleeping car
birth.
The hotel here is a great big place and got good eats. We got in at
breakfast time and I made a B line for the dining room. Kid Gleason
who is a kind of asst. manager to Callahan come in and sat down with
me. He says Leave something for the rest of the boys because they will
be just as hungry as you. He says Ain't you afraid you will cut your
throat with that knife. He says There ain't no extra charge for using
the forks. He says You shouldn't ought to eat so much because you're
overweight now. I says You may think I am fat, but it's all solid bone
and muscle. He says Yes I suppose it's all solid bone from the neck
up. I guess he thought I would get sore but I will let them kid me now
because they will take off their hats to me when they see me work.
Manager Callahan called us all to his room after breakfast and give us
a lecture. He says there would be no work for us the first day but that
we must all take a long walk over the hills. He also says we must not
take the training trip as a joke. Then the colored trainer give us our
suits and I went to my room and tried mine on. I ain't a bad looking
guy in the White Sox uniform Al. I will have my picture taken and send
you boys some.
My roommate is Allen a lefthander from the Coast League. He don't
look nothing like a pitcher but you can't never tell about them dam
left handers. Well I didn't go on the long walk because I was tired
out. Walsh stayed at the hotel too and when he seen me he says Why
didn't you go with the bunch? I says I was too tired. He says Well when
Callahan comes back you better keep out of sight or tell him you are
sick. I says I don't care nothing for Callahan. He says No but Callahan
is crazy about you. He says You better obey orders and you will git
along better. I guess Walsh thinks I am some rube.
When the bunch come back Callahan never said a word to me but Gleason
come up and says Where was you? I told him I was too tired to go
walking. He says Well I will borrow a wheelbarrow some place and push
you round. He says Do you sit down when you pitch? I let him kid me
because he has not saw my stuff yet.
Next morning half the bunch mostly vetrans went to the ball park which
isn't no better than the one we got at home. Most of them was vetrans
as I say but I was in the bunch. That makes things look pretty good
for me don't it Al? We tossed the ball round and hit fungos and run
round and then Callahan asks Scott and Russell and I to warm up easy
and pitch a few to the batters. It was warm and I felt pretty good so
I warmed up pretty good. Scott pitched to them first and kept laying
them right over with nothing on them. I don't believe a man gets any
batting practice that way. So I went in and after I lobbed a few over
I cut loose my fast one. Lord was to bat and he ducked out of the way
and then throwed his bat to the bench. Callahan says What's the matter
Harry? Lord says I forgot to pay up my life insurance. He says I ain't
ready for Walter Johnson's July stuff.
Well Al I will make them think I am Walter Johnson before I get through
with them. But Callahan come out to me and says What are you trying to
do kill somebody? He says Save your smoke because you're going to need
it later on. He says Go easy with the boys at first or I won't have
no batters. But he was laughing and I guess he was pleased to see the
stuff I had.
There is a dance in the hotel to-night and I am up in my room writing
this in my underwear while I get my suit pressed. I got it all mussed
up coming out here. I don't know what shoes to wear. I asked Gleason
and he says Wear your baseball shoes and if any of the girls gets fresh
with you spike them. I guess he was kidding me.
Write and tell me all the news about home.
Yours truly, JACK.
_Paso Robles, California, March 7._
FRIEND AL: I showed them something out there to-day Al. We had a game
between two teams. One team was made up of most of the regulars and
the other was made up of recruts. I pitched three innings for the
recruts and shut the old birds out. I held them to one hit and that was
a ground ball that the recrut shortstop Johnson ought to of ate up.
I struck Collins out and he is one of the best batters in the bunch.
I used my fast ball most of the while but showed them a few spitters
and they missed them a foot. I guess I must of got Walsh's goat with
my spitter because him and I walked back to the hotel together and he
talked like he was kind of jealous. He says You will have to learn to
cover up your spitter. He says I could stand a mile away and tell when
you was going to throw it. He says Some of these days I will learn you
how to cover it up. I guess Al I know how to cover it up all right
without Walsh learning me.
I always sit at the same table in the dining room along with Gleason
and Collins and Bodie and Fournier and Allen the young lefthander I
told you about. I feel sorry for him because he never says a word.
To-night at supper Bodie says How did I look to-day Kid? Gleason
says Just like you always do in the spring. You looked like a cow.
Gleason seems to have the whole bunch scared of him and they let him
say anything he wants to. I let him kid me to but I ain't scared of
him. Collins then says to me You got some fast ball there boy. I says
I was not as fast to-day as I am when I am right. He says Well then I
don't want to hit against you when you are right. Then Gleason says to
Collins Cut that stuff out. Then he says to me Don't believe what he
tells you boy. If the pitchers in this league weren't no faster than
you I would still be playing ball and I would be the best hitter in the
country.
After supper Gleason went out on the porch with me. He says Boy you
have got a little stuff but you have got a lot to learn. He says You
field your position like a wash woman and you don't hold the runners
up. He says When Chase was on second base to-day he got such a lead
on you that the little catcher couldn't of shot him out at third with
a rifle. I says They all thought I fielded my position all right in
the Central League. He says Well if you think you do it all right you
better go back to the Central League where you are appresiated. I says
You can't send me back there because you could not get waivers. He
says Who would claim you? I says St. Louis and Boston and New York.
You know Al what Smith told me this winter. Gleason says Well if you're
not willing to learn St. Louis and Boston and New York can have you and
the first time you pitch against us we will steal fifty bases. Then he
quit kidding and asked me to go to the field with him early to-morrow
morning and he would learn me some things. I don't think he can learn
me nothing but I promised I would go with him.
There is a little blonde kid in the hotel here who took a shine to me
at the dance the other night but I am going to leave the skirts alone.
She is real society and a swell dresser and she wants my picture.
Regards to all the boys.
Your friend, JACK.
P.S. The boys thought they would be smart to-night and put something
over on me. A boy brought me a telegram and I opened it and it said You
are sold to Jackson in the Cotton States League. For just a minute they
had me going but then I happened to think that Jackson is in Michigan
and there's no Cotton States League round there.
_Paso Robles, California, March 9._
DEAR FRIEND AL: You have no doubt read the good news in the papers
before this reaches you. I have been picked to go to Frisco with the
first team. We play practice games up there about two weeks while the
second club plays in Los Angeles. Poor Allen had to go with the second
club. There's two other recrut pitchers with our part of the team
but my name was first on the list so it looks like I had made good.
I knowed they would like my stuff when they seen it. We leave here
to-night. You got the first team's address so you will know where to
send my mail. Callahan goes with us and Gleason goes with the second
club. Him and I have got to be pretty good pals and I wish he was going
with us even if he don't let me eat like I want to. He told me this
morning to remember all he had learned me and to keep working hard. He
didn't learn me nothing I didn't know before but I let him think so.
The little blonde don't like to see me leave here. She lives in Detroit
and I may see her when I go there. She wants me to write but I guess I
better not give her no encouragement.
Well Al I will write you a long letter from Frisco.
Yours truly, JACK.
_Oakland, California, March 19._
DEAR OLD PAL: They have gave me plenty of work here all right. I have
pitched four times but have not went over five innings yet. I worked
against Oakland two times and against Frisco two times and only three
runs have been scored off me. They should only ought to of had one but
Bodie misjuged a easy fly ball in Frisco and Weaver made a wild peg in
Oakland that let in a run. I am not using much but my fast ball but I
have got a world of speed and they can't foul me when I am right. I
whiffed eight men in five innings in Frisco yesterday and could of did
better than that if I had of cut loose.
Manager Callahan is a funny guy and I don't understand him sometimes.
I can't figure out if he is kidding or in ernest. We road back to
Oakland on the ferry together after yesterday's game and he says Don't
you never throw a slow ball? I says I don't need no slow ball with my
spitter and my fast one. He says No of course you don't need it but if
I was you I would get one of the boys to learn it to me. He says And
you better watch the way the boys fields their positions and holds up
the runners. He says To see you work a man might think they had a rule
in the Central League forbidding a pitcher from leaving the box or
looking toward first base.
I told him the Central didn't have no rule like that. He says And I
noticed you taking your wind up when What's His Name was on second base
there to-day. I says Yes I got more stuff when I wind up. He says Of
course you have but if you wind up like that with Cobb on base he will
steal your watch and chain. I says Maybe Cobb can't get on base when I
work against him. He says That's right and maybe San Francisco Bay is
made of grapejuice. Then he walks away from me.
He give one of the youngsters a awful bawling out for something he done
in the game at supper last night. If he ever talks to me like he done
to him I will take a punch at him. You know me Al.
I come over to Frisco last night with some of the boys and we took in
the sights. Frisco is some live town Al. We went all through China
Town and the Barbers' Coast. Seen lots of swell dames but they was all
painted up. They have beer out here that they call steam beer. I had
a few glasses of it and it made me logey. A glass of that Terre Haute
beer would go pretty good right now.
We leave here for Los Angeles in a few days and I will write you from
there. This is some country Al and I would love to play ball round here.
Your Pal, JACK.
P.S.--I got a letter from the little blonde and I suppose I got to
answer it.
_Los Angeles, California, March 26._
FRIEND AL: Only four more days of sunny California and then we start
back East. We got exhibition games in Yuma and El Paso, Texas, and
Oklahoma City and then we stop over in St. Joe, Missouri, for three
days before we go home. You know Al we open the season in Cleveland and
we won't be in Chi no more than just passing through. We don't play
there till April eighteenth and I guess I will work in that serious all
right against Detroit. Then I will be glad to have you and the boys
come up and watch me as you suggested in your last letter.
I got another letter from the little blonde. She has went back to
Detroit but she give me her address and telephone number and believe
me Al I am going to look her up when we get there the twenty-ninth of
April.
She is a stenographer and was out here with her uncle and aunt.
I had a run in with Kelly last night and it looked like I would have
to take a wallop at him but the other boys seperated us. He is a bush
outfielder from the New England League. We was playing poker. You know
the boys plays poker a good deal but this was the first time I got in.
I was having pretty good luck and was about four bucks to the good and
I was thinking of quitting because I was tired and sleepy. Then Kelly
opened the pot for fifty cents and I stayed. I had three sevens. No one
else stayed. Kelly stood pat and I drawed two cards. And I catched my
fourth seven. He bet fifty cents but I felt pretty safe even if he did
have a pat hand. So I called him. I took the money and told them I was
through.
Lord and some of the boys laughed but Kelly got nasty and begun to pan
me for quitting and for the way I played. I says Well I won the pot
didn't I? He says Yes and he called me something. I says I got a notion
to take a punch at you.
He says Oh you have have you? And I come back at him. I says Yes I have
have I? I would of busted his jaw if they hadn't stopped me. You know
me Al.
I worked here two times once against Los Angeles and once against
Venice. I went the full nine innings both times and Venice beat me four
to two. I could of beat them easy with any kind of support. I walked a
couple of guys in the forth and Chase drops a throw and Collins lets a
fly ball get away from him. At that I would of shut them out if I had
wanted to cut loose. After the game Callahan says You didn't look so
good in there to-day. I says I didn't cut loose. He says Well you been
working pretty near three weeks now and you ought to be in shape to cut
loose. I says Oh I am in shape all right. He says Well don't work no
harder than you have to or you might get hurt and then the league would
blow up. I don't know if he was kidding me or not but I guess he thinks
pretty well of me because he works me lots oftener than Walsh or Scott
or Benz.
I will try to write you from Yuma, Texas, but we don't stay there only
a day and I may not have time for a long letter.
Yours truly, JACK.
_Yuma, Arizona, April 1._
DEAR OLD AL: Just a line to let you know we are on our way back East.
This place is in Arizona and it sure is sandy. They haven't got no
regular ball club here and we play a pick-up team this afternoon.
Callahan told me I would have to work. He says I am using you because
we want to get through early and I know you can beat them quick. That
is the first time he has said anything like that and I guess he is
wiseing up that I got the goods.
We was talking about the Athaletics this morning and Callahan says None
of you fellows pitch right to Baker. I was talking to Lord and Scott
afterward and I say to Scott How do you pitch to Baker? He says I use
my fadeaway. I says How do you throw it? He says Just like you throw a
fast ball to anybody else. I says Why do you call it a fadeaway then?
He says Because when I throw it to Baker it fades away over the fence.
This place is full of Indians and I wish you could see them Al. They
don't look nothing like the Indians we seen in that show last summer.
Your old pal, JACK.
_Oklahoma City, April 4._
FRIEND AL: Coming out of Amarillo last night I and Lord and Weaver was
sitting at a table in the dining car with a old lady. None of us were
talking to her but she looked me over pretty careful and seemed to
kind of like my looks. Finally she says Are you boys with some football
club? Lord nor Weaver didn't say nothing so I thought it was up to me
and I says No mam this is the Chicago White Sox Ball Club. She says
I knew you were athaletes. I says Yes I guess you could spot us for
athaletes. She says Yes indeed and specially you. You certainly look
healthy. I says You ought to see me stripped. I didn't see nothing
funny about that but I thought Lord and Weaver would die laughing. Lord
had to get up and leave the table and he told everybody what I said.
All the boys wanted me to play poker on the way here but I told them I
didn't feel good. I know enough to quit when I am ahead Al. Callahan
and I sat down to breakfast all alone this morning. He says Boy why
don't you get to work? I says What do you mean? Ain't I working? He
says You ain't improving none. You have got the stuff to make a good
pitcher but you don't go after bunts and you don't cover first base and
you don't watch the baserunners. He made me kind of sore talking that
way and I says Oh I guess I can get along all right.
He says Well I am going to put it up to you. I am going to start
you over in St. Joe day after to-morrow and I want you to show me
something. I want you to cut loose with all you've got and I want you
to get round the infield a little and show them you aren't tied in that
box. I says Oh I can field my position if I want to. He says Well you
better want to or I will have to ship you back to the sticks. Then he
got up and left. He didn't scare me none Al. They won't ship me to no
sticks after the way I showed on this trip and even if they did they
couldn't get no waivers on me.
Some of the boys have begun to call me Four Sevens but it don't bother
me none.
Yours truly, JACK.
_St. Joe, Missouri, April 7._
FRIEND AL: It rained yesterday so I worked to-day instead and St. Joe
done well to get three hits. They couldn't of scored if we had played
all week. I give a couple of passes but I catched a guy flatfooted off
of first base and I come up with a couple of bunts and throwed guys
out. When the game was over Callahan says That's the way I like to see
you work. You looked better to-day than you looked on the whole trip.
Just once you wound up with a man on but otherwise you was all O.K. So
I guess my job is cinched Al and I won't have to go to New York or
St. Louis. I would rather be in Chi anyway because it is near home. I
wouldn't care though if they traded me to Detroit. I hear from Violet
right along and she says she can't hardly wait till I come to Detroit.
She says she is strong for the Tigers but she will pull for me when I
work against them. She is nuts over me and I guess she has saw lots of
guys to.
I sent her a stickpin from Oklahoma City but I can't spend no more
dough on her till after our first payday the fifteenth of the month. I
had thirty bucks on me when I left home and I only got about ten left
including the five spot I won in the poker game. I have to tip the
waiters about thirty cents a day and I seen about twenty picture shows
on the coast besides getting my cloths pressed a couple of times.
We leave here to-morrow night and arrive in Chi the next morning. The
second club joins us there and then that night we go to Cleveland to
open up. I asked one of the reporters if he knowed who was going to
pitch the opening game and he says it would be Scott or Walsh but I
guess he don't know much about it.
These reporters travel all round the country with the team all season
and send in telegrams about the game every night. I ain't seen no Chi
papers so I don't know what they been saying about me. But I should
worry eh Al? Some of them are pretty nice fellows and some of them got
the swell head. They hang round with the old fellows and play poker
most of the time.
Will write you from Cleveland. You will see in the paper if I pitch the
opening game.
Your old pal, JACK.
_Cleveland, Ohio, April 10._
OLD FRIEND AL: Well Al we are all set to open the season this
afternoon. I have just ate breakfast and I am sitting in the lobby of
the hotel. I eat at a little lunch counter about a block from here and
I saved seventy cents on breakfast. You see Al they give us a dollar a
meal and if we don't want to spend that much all right. Our rooms at
the hotel are paid for.
The Cleveland papers says Walsh or Scott will work for us this
afternoon. I asked Callahan if there was any chance of me getting into
the first game and he says I hope not. I don't know what he meant but
he may surprise these reporters and let me pitch. I will beat them Al.
Lajoie and Jackson is supposed to be great batters but the bigger they
are the harder they fall.
The second team joined us yesterday in Chi and we practiced a little.
Poor Allen was left in Chi last night with four others of the recrut
pitchers. Looks pretty good for me eh Al? I only seen Gleason for a few
minutes on the train last night. He says, Well you ain't took off much
weight. You're hog fat. I says Oh I ain't fat. I didn't need to take
off no weight. He says One good thing about it the club don't have to
engage no birth for you because you spend all your time in the dining
car. We kidded along like that a while and then the trainer rubbed my
arm and I went to bed. Well Al I just got time to have my suit pressed
before noon.
Yours truly, JACK.
_Cleveland, Ohio, April 11._
FRIEND AL: Well Al I suppose you know by this time that I did not pitch
and that we got licked. Scott was in there and he didn't have nothing.
When they had us beat four to one in the eight inning Callahan told me
to go out and warm up and he put a batter in for Scott in our ninth.
But Cleveland didn't have to play their ninth so I got no chance to
work. But it looks like he means to start me in one of the games here.
We got three more to play. Maybe I will pitch this afternoon. I got
a postcard from Violet. She says Beat them Naps. I will give them a
battle Al if I get a chance.
Glad to hear you boys have fixed it up to come to Chi during the
Detroit serious. I will ask Callahan when he is going to pitch me and
let you know. Thanks Al for the papers.
Your friend, JACK.
_St. Louis, Missouri, April 15._
FRIEND AL: Well Al I guess I showed them. I only worked one inning but
I guess them Browns is glad I wasn't in there no longer than that. They
had us beat seven to one in the sixth and Callahan pulls Benz out. I
honestly felt sorry for him but he didn't have nothing, not a thing.
They was hitting him so hard I thought they would score a hundred runs.
A righthander name Bumgardner was pitching for them and he didn't look
to have nothing either but we ain't got much of a batting team Al. I
could hit better than some of them regulars. Anyway Callahan called
Benz to the bench and sent for me. I was down in the corner warming up
with Kuhn. I wasn't warmed up good but you know I got the nerve Al and
I run right out there like I meant business. There was a man on second
and nobody out when I come in. I didn't know who was up there but I
found out afterward it was Shotten. He's the center-fielder. I was cold
and I walked him. Then I got warmed up good and I made Johnston look
like a boob. I give him three fast balls and he let two of them go by
and missed the other one. I would of handed him a spitter but Schalk
kept signing for fast ones and he knows more about them batters than
me. Anyway I whiffed Johnston. Then up come Williams and I tried to
make him hit at a couple of bad ones. I was in the hole with two balls
and nothing and come right across the heart with my fast one. I wish
you could of saw the hop on it. Williams hit it right straight up and
Lord was camped under it. Then up come Pratt the best hitter on their
club. You know what I done to him don't you Al? I give him one spitter
and another he didn't strike at that was a ball. Then I come back with
two fast ones and Mister Pratt was a dead baby. And you notice they
didn't steal no bases neither.
In our half of the seventh inning Weaver and Schalk got on and I was
going up there with a stick when Callahan calls me back and sends
Easterly up. I don't know what kind of managing you call that. I hit
good on the training trip and he must of knew they had no chance to
score off me in the innings they had left while they were liable to
murder his other pitchers. I come back to the bench pretty hot and I
says You're making a mistake. He says If Comiskey had wanted you to
manage this team he would of hired you.
Then Easterly pops out and I says Now I guess you're sorry you didn't
let me hit. That sent him right up in the air and he bawled me awful.
Honest Al I would of cracked him right in the jaw if we hadn't been
right out where everybody could of saw us. Well he sent Cicotte in to
finish and they didn't score no more and we didn't neither.
I road down in the car with Gleason. He says Boy you shouldn't ought to
talk like that to Cal. Some day he will lose his temper and bust you
one. I says He won't never bust me. I says He didn't have no right to
talk like that to me. Gleason says I suppose you think he's going to
laugh and smile when we lost four out of the first five games. He says
Wait till to-night and then go up to him and let him know you are sorry
you sassed him. I says I didn't sass him and I ain't sorry.
So after supper I seen Callahan sitting in the lobby and I went over
and sit down by him. I says When are you going to let me work? He
says I wouldn't never let you work only my pitchers are all shot to
pieces. Then I told him about you boys coming up from Bedford to watch
me during the Detroit serious and he says Well I will start you in
the second game against Detroit. He says But I wouldn't if I had any
pitchers. He says A girl could get out there and pitch better than some
of them have been doing.
So you see Al I am going to pitch on the nineteenth. I hope you guys
can be up there and I will show you something. I know I can beat them
Tigers and I will have to do it even if they are Violet's team.
I notice that New York and Boston got trimmed to-day so I suppose they
wish Comiskey would ask for waivers on me. No chance Al.
Your old pal, JACK.
P.S.--We play eleven games in Chi and then go to Detroit. So I will see
the little girl on the twenty-ninth.
Oh you Violet.
_Chicago, Illinois, April 19._
DEAR OLD PAL: Well Al it's just as well you couldn't come. They beat me
and I am writing you this so as you will know the truth about the game
and not get a bum steer from what you read in the papers.
I had a sore arm when I was warming up and Callahan should never ought
to of sent me in there. And Schalk kept signing for my fast ball and
I kept giving it to him because I thought he ought to know something
about the batters. Weaver and Lord and all of them kept kicking them
round the infield and Collins and Bodie couldn't catch nothing.
Callahan ought never to of left me in there when he seen how sore my
arm was. Why, I couldn't of threw hard enough to break a pain of glass
my arm was so sore.
They sure did run wild on the bases. Cobb stole four and Bush and
Crawford and Veach about two apiece. Schalk didn't even make a peg half
the time. I guess he was trying to throw me down.
The score was sixteen to two when Callahan finally took me out in the
eighth and I don't know how many more they got. I kept telling him
to take me out when I seen how bad I was but he wouldn't do it. They
started bunting in the fifth and Lord and Chase just stood there and
didn't give me no help at all.
I was all O.K. till I had the first two men out in the first inning.
Then Crawford come up. I wanted to give him a spitter but Schalk signs
me for the fast one and I give it to him. The ball didn't hop much and
Crawford happened to catch it just right. At that Collins ought to of
catched the ball. Crawford made three bases and up come Cobb. It was
the first time I ever seen him. He hollered at me right off the reel.
He says You better walk me you busher. I says I will walk you back to
the bench. Schalk signs for a spitter and I gives it to him and Cobb
misses it.
Then instead of signing for another one Schalk asks for a fast one and
I shook my head no but he signed for it again and yells Put something
on it. So I throwed a fast one and Cobb hits it right over second base.
I don't know what Weaver was doing but he never made a move for the
ball. Crawford scored and Cobb was on first base. First thing I knowed
he had stole second while I held the ball. Callahan yells Wake up out
there and I says Why don't your catcher tell me when they are going to
steal. Schalk says Get in there and pitch and shut your mouth. Then I
got mad and walked Veach and Moriarty but before I walked Moriarty Cobb
and Veach pulled a double steal on Schalk. Gainor lifts a fly and Lord
drops it and two more come in. Then Stanage walks and I whiffs their
pitcher.
I come in to the bench and Callahan says Are your friends from Bedford
up here? I was pretty sore and I says Why don't you get a catcher? He
says We don't need no catcher when you're pitching because you can't
get nothing past their bats. Then he says You better leave your uniform
in here when you go out next inning or Cobb will steal it off your
back. I says My arm is sore. He says Use your other one and you'll do
just as good.
Gleason says Who do you want to warm up? Callahan says Nobody. He says
Cobb is going to lead the league in batting and basestealing anyway so
we might as well give him a good start. I was mad enough to punch his
jaw but the boys winked at me not to do nothing.
Well I got some support in the next inning and nobody got on. Between
innings I says Well I guess I look better now don't I? Callahan says
Yes but you wouldn't look so good if Collins hadn't jumped up on the
fence and catched that one off Crawford. That's all the encouragement I
got Al.
Cobb come up again to start the third and when Schalk signs me for a
fast one I shakes my head. Then Schalk says All right pitch anything
you want to. I pitched a spitter and Cobb bunts it right at me. I would
of threw him out a block but I stubbed my toe in a rough place and fell
down. This is the roughest ground I ever seen Al. Veach bunts and for a
wonder Lord throws him out. Cobb goes to second and honest Al I forgot
all about him being there and first thing I knowed he had stole third.
Then Moriarty hits a fly ball to Bodie and Cobb scores though Bodie
ought to of threw him out twenty feet.
They batted all round in the forth inning and scored four or five more.
Crawford got the luckiest three-base hit I ever see. He popped one way
up in the air and the wind blowed it against the fence. The wind is
something fierce here Al. At that Collins ought to of got under it.
I was looking at the bench all the time expecting Callahan to call me
in but he kept hollering Go on and pitch. Your friends wants to see you
pitch.
Well Al I don't know how they got the rest of their runs but they had
more luck than any team I ever seen. And all the time Jennings was on
the coaching line yelling like a Indian. Some day Al I'm going to punch
his jaw.
After Veach had hit one in the eight Callahan calls me to the bench
and says You're through for the day. I says It's about time you found
out my arm was sore. He says I ain't worrying about your arm but I'm
afraid some of our outfielders will run their legs off and some of them
poor infielders will get killed. He says The reporters just sent me a
message saying they had run out of paper. Then he says I wish some of
the other clubs had pitchers like you so we could hit once in a while.
He says Go in the clubhouse and get your arm rubbed off. That's the
only way I can get Jennings sore he says.
Well Al that's about all there was to it. It will take two or three
stamps to send this but I want you to know the truth about it. The way
my arm was I ought never to of went in there.
Yours truly, JACK.
_Chicago, Illinois, April 25._
FRIEND AL: Just a line to let you know I am still on earth. My arm
feels pretty good again and I guess maybe I will work at Detroit.
Violet writes that she can't hardly wait to see me. Looks like I got a
regular girl now Al. We go up there the twenty-ninth and maybe I won't
be glad to see her. I hope she will be out to the game the day I pitch.
I will pitch the way I want to next time and them Tigers won't have
such a picnic.
I suppose you seen what the Chicago reporters said about that game. I
will punch a couple of their jaws when I see them.
Your pal, JACK.
_Chicago, Illinois, April 29._
DEAR OLD AL: Well Al it's all over. The club went to Detroit last night
and I didn't go along. Callahan told me to report to Comiskey this
morning and I went up to the office at ten o'clock. He give me my pay
to date and broke the news. I am sold to Frisco.
I asked him how they got waivers on me and he says Oh there was no
trouble about that because they all heard how you tamed the Tigers.
Then he patted me on the back and says Go out there and work hard boy
and maybe you'll get another chance some day. I was kind of choked up
so I walked out of the office.
I ain't had no fair deal Al and I ain't going to no Frisco. I will quit
the game first and take that job Charley offered me at the billiard
hall.
I expect to be in Bedford in a couple of days. I have got to pack up
first and settle with my landlady about my room here which I engaged
for all season thinking I would be treated square. I am going to rest
and lay round home a while and try to forget this rotten game. Tell the
boys about it Al and tell them I never would of got let out if I hadn't
worked with a sore arm.
I feel sorry for that little girl up in Detroit Al. She expected me
there to-day.
Your old pal, JACK.
P.S. I suppose you seen where that lucky lefthander Allen shut out
Cleveland with two hits yesterday. The lucky stiff.