To Mrs. Temple, Pall Mall.
Silleri, June 30.
You are extremely mistaken, my dear, in your idea of the society
here; I had rather live at Quebec, take it for all in all, than in any
town in England, except London; the manner of living here is uncommonly
agreable; the scenes about us are lovely, and the mode of amusements
make us taste those scenes in full perfection.
Whilst your brother and Emily were here, I had not a wish to leave
Canada; but their going has left a void in my heart, which will not
easily be filled up: I have loved Emily almost from childhood, and
there is a peculiar tenderness in those friendships, which
"Grow with our growth, and strengthen with our strength."
There was also something romantic and agreable in finding her here,
and unexpectedly, after we had been separated by Colonel Montague's
having left the regiment in which my father served.
In short, every thing concurred to make us dear to each other, and
therefore to give a greater poignancy to the pain of parting a second
time.
As to your brother, I love him so much, that a man who had less
candor and generosity than Fitzgerald, would be almost angry at my very
lively friendship.
I have this moment a letter from Madame Des Roches; she laments the
loss of our two amiable friends; begs me to assure them both of her
eternal remembrance: says, "she congratulates Emily on possessing the
heart of the man on earth most worthy of being beloved; that she cannot
form an idea of any human felicity equal to that of the woman, the
business of whose life it is to make Colonel Rivers happy. That, heaven
having denied her that happiness, she will never marry, nor enter into
an engagement which would make it criminal in her to remember him with
tenderness: that it is, however, she believes, best for her he has
left the country, for that it is impossible she should ever have seen
him with indifference."
It is perhaps as prudent not to mention these circumstances either
to your brother or Emily; I thought of sending her letter to them, but
there is a certain fire in her style, mixed with tenderness, when she
speaks of Rivers, which would only have given them both regret, by
making them see the excess of her affection for him; her expressions
are much stronger than those in which I have given you the sense of
them.
I intend to be very intimate with her, because she loves my dear
Rivers; she loves Emily too, at least she fancies she does, but I am a
little doubtful as to the friendships between rivals: at this distance,
however, I dare say, they will always continue on the best terms
possible, and I would have Emily write to her.
Do you know she has desired me to contrive to get her a picture of
your brother, without his knowing it? I am not determined whether I
shall indulge her in this fancy or not; if I do, I must employ you as
my agent. It is madness in her to desire it; but, as there is a
pleasure in being mad, I am not sure my morality will let me refuse
her, since pleasures are not very thick sown in this world.
Adieu!
Your affectionate
A. Fermor.