Node:-oid, Next:old fart, Previous:ogg, Up:= O =_The Jargon File, Version 4.2.2, 20 Aug 2000

-oid suff.

[from Greek suffix -oid = `in the image of'] 1. Used as in

mainstream slang English to indicate a poor imitation, a

counterfeit, or some otherwise slightly bogus resemblance.

Hackers will happily use it with all sorts of non-Greco/Latin

stem words that wouldn't keep company with it in mainstream

English. For example, "He's a nerdoid" means that he

superficially resembles a nerd but can't make the grade; a

`modemoid' might be a 300-baud box (Real Modems run at 28.8 or

up); a `computeroid' might be any bitty

box. The word `keyboid' could be used to describe a chiclet keyboard, but would

have to be written; spoken, it would confuse the listener as to

the speaker's city of origin. 2. More specifically, an indicator

for `resembling an android' which in the past has been confined

to science-fiction fans and hackers. It too has recently (in

1991) started to go mainstream (most notably in the term

`trendoid' for victims of terminal hipness). This is probably

traceable to the popularization of the term droid in "Star Wars" and its sequels. (See also

windoid.)

Coinages in both forms have been common in science fiction for

at least fifty years, and hackers (who are often SF fans) have

probably been making `-oid' jargon for almost that long [though

GLS and I can personally confirm only that they were already

common in the mid-1970s --ESR].

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old fart n.

Tribal elder. A title self-assumed with remarkable frequency

by (esp.) Usenetters who have been programming for more than

about 25 years; often appears in sig

blocks attached to Jargon File contributions of great

archeological significance. This is a term of insult in the

second or third person but one of pride in first person.

Node:Old Testament, Next:on the gripping

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Old Testament n.

[C programmers] The first edition of K&R, the sacred text describing Classic C.

Node:on the gripping

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on the gripping hand

In the progression that starts "On the one hand..." and

continues "On the other hand..." mainstream English may add "on

the third hand..." even though most people don't have three

hands. Among hackers, it is just as likely to be "on the gripping

hand". This metaphor supplied the title of Larry Niven &

Jerry Pournelle's 1993 SF novel "The Gripping Hand" which

involved a species of hostile aliens with three arms (the same

species, in fact, referenced in juggling eggs). As with TANSTAAFL and con,

this usage one of the naturalized imports from SF fandom

frequently observed among hackers.

Node:one-banana problem,

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one-banana problem n.

At mainframe shops, where the computers have operators for

routine administrivia, the programmers and hardware people tend

to look down on the operators and claim that a trained monkey

could do their job. It is frequently observed that the incentives

that would be offered said monkeys can be used as a scale to

describe the difficulty of a task. A one-banana problem is

simple; hence, "It's only a one-banana job at the most; what's

taking them so long?"

At IBM, folklore divides the world into one-, two-, and

three-banana problems. Other cultures have different hierarchies

and may divide them more finely; at ICL, for example, five grapes

(a bunch) equals a banana. Their upper limit for the in-house

sysapes is said to be two bananas

and three grapes (another source claims it's three bananas and

one grape, but observes "However, this is subject to local

variations, cosmic rays and ISO"). At a complication level any

higher than that, one asks the manufacturers to send someone

around to check things.