HAVING ONE HEART
Two that live together in union are supposed to be intimate on every
leaf. Particularly when they love one another and the cause they have
at heart is common to them in equal measure, the uses of a cordial
familiarity forbid reserves upon important matters between them, as
we think; not thinking of an imposed secretiveness, beneath the false
external of submissiveness, which comes of an experience of repeated
inefficiency to maintain a case in opposition, on the part of the
loquently weaker of the pair. In Constitutional Kingdoms a powerful
Government needs not to be tyrannical to lean oppressively; it is more
serviceable to party than agreeable to country; and where the alliance
of men and women binds a loving couple, of whom one is a torrent of
persuasion, their differings are likely to make the other resemble a log
of the torrent. It is borne along; it dreams of a distant corner of the
way for a determined stand; it consents to its whirling in anticipation
of an undated hour when it will no longer be neutral.
There may be, moreover, while each has the key of the fellow breast, a
mutually sensitive nerve to protest against intrusion of light or sound.
The cloud over the name of their girl could now strike Nataly and
Victor dumb in their taking of counsel. She divined that his hint had
encouraged him to bring the crisis nearer, and he that her comprehension
had become tremblingly awake. They shrank, each of them, the more from
an end drawing closely into view. All subjects glooming off or darkening
up to it were shunned by them verbally, and if they found themselves
entering beneath that shadow, conversation passed to an involuntary
gesture, more explicit with him, significant of the prohibited, though
not acknowledging it.
All the stronger was it Victor’s purpose, leaping in his fashion to the
cover of action as an escape from perplexity, to burn and scheme for
the wedding of their girl--the safe wedding of that dearest, to have her
protected, secure, with the world warm about her. And he well knew why
his Nataly had her look of a closed vault (threatening, if opened, to
thunder upon Life) when he dropped his further hints. He chose to call
it feminine inconsistency, in a woman who walked abroad with a basket
of marriage-ties for the market on her arm. He knew that she would soon
have to speak the dark words to their girl; and the idea of any doing
of it, caught at his throat. Reasonably she dreaded the mother’s task;
pardonably indeed. But it is for the mother to do, with a girl. He
deputed it lightly to the mother because he could see himself stating
the facts to a son. ‘And, my dear boy, you will from this day draw your
five thousand a year, and we double it on the day of your marriage,
living at Lakelands or where you will.’
His desire for his girl’s protection by the name of one of our great
Families, urged him to bind Nataly to the fact, with the argument, that
it was preferable for the girl to hear their story during her green
early youth, while she reposed her beautiful blind faith in the
discretion of her parents, and as an immediate step to the placing of
her hand in a husband’s. He feared that her mother required schooling
to tell the story vindicatingly and proudly, in a manner to distinguish
instead of degrading or temporarily seeming to accept degradation.
The world would weigh on her confession of the weight of the world on
her child; she would want inciting and strengthening, if one judged of
her capacity to meet the trial by her recent bearing; and how was he
to do it! He could not imagine himself encountering the startled,
tremulous, nascent intelligence in those pure brown darklashed eyes of
Nesta; he pitied the poor mother. Fancifully directing her to say this
and that to the girl, his tongue ran till it was cut from his heart and
left to wag dead colourless words.
The prospect of a similar business of exposition, certainly devolving
upon the father in treaty with the fortunate youth, gripped at his
vitals a minute, so intense was his pride in appearing woundless and
scarless, a shining surface, like pure health’s, in the sight of men.
Nevertheless he skimmed the story, much as a lecturer strikes his wand
on the prominent places of a map, that is to show us how he arrived
at the principal point, which we are all agreed to find chiefly
interesting. This with Victor was the naming of Nesta’s bridal
endowment. He rushed to it. ‘My girl will have ten thousand a year
settled on her the day of her marriage.’ Choice of living at Lakelands
was offered.
It helped him over the unpleasant part of that interview. At the
same time, it moved him to a curious contempt of the youth. He had
to conjure-up an image of the young man in person, to correct the
sentiment:--and it remained as a kind of bruise only half cured.
Mr. Dudley Sowerby was not one of the youths whose presence would
rectify such an abstract estimate of the genus pursuer. He now came
frequently of an evening, to practise a duet for flutes with Victor;--a
Mercadante, honeyed and flowing; too honeyed to suit a style that, as
Fenellan characterized it to Nataly, went through the music somewhat
like an inquisitive tourist in a foreign town, conscientious to get to
the end of the work of pleasure; until the notes had become familiar,
when it rather resembled a constable’s walk along the midnight streets
into collision with a garlanded roysterer; and the man of order and
the man of passion, true to the measure though they were, seeming to
dissent, almost to wrangle, in their different ways of winding out the
melody, on to the last movement; which was plainly a question between
home to the strayed reveller’s quarters or off to the lockup. Victor was
altogether the younger of the two. But his vehement accompaniment was
a tutorship; Mr. Sowerby improved; it was admitted by Nesta and
mademoiselle that he gained a show of feeling; he had learnt that
feeling was wanted. Passion, he had not a notion of: otherwise he would
not be delaying; the interview, dramatized by the father of the young
bud of womanhood, would be taking place, and the entry into Lakelands
calculable, for Nataly’s comfort, as under the aegis of the Cantor
earldom. Gossip flies to a wider circle round the members of a great
titled family, is inaudible; or no longer the diptherian whisper the
commonalty hear of the commonalty: and so we see the social uses of our
aristocracy survive. We do not want the shield of any family; it is the
situation that wants it; Nataly ought to be awake to the fact. One blow
and we have silenced our enemy: Nesta’s wedding-day has relieved her
parents.
Victor’s thoughts upon the instrument for striking that, blow, led him
to suppose Mr. Sowerby might be meditating on the extent of the young
lady’s fortune. He talked randomly of money, in a way to shatter
Nataly’s conception of him. He talked of City affairs at table, as it
had been his practice to shun the doing; and hit the resounding note
on mines, which have risen in the market like the crest of a serpent,
casting a certain spell upon the mercantile understanding. ‘Fredi’s
diamonds from her own mine, or what once was--and she still reserves a
share,’ were to be shown to Mr. Sowerby.
Nataly respected the young fellow for not displaying avidity at the
flourish of the bait, however it might be affecting him; and she fancied
that he did laboriously, in his way earnestly, study her girl, to sound
for harmony between them, previous to a wooing. She was a closer reader
of social character than Victor; from refraining to run on the broad
lines which are but faintly illustrative of the individual one in
being common to all--unless we have hit by chance on an example of the
downright in roguery or folly or simple goodness. Mr. Sowerby’g bearing
to Nesta was hardly warmed by the glitter of diamonds. His next visit
showed him livelier in courtliness, brighter, fresher; but that was
always his way at the commencement of every visit, as if his reflections
on the foregone had come to a satisfactory conclusion; and the labours
of the new study of the maiden ensued again in due course to deaden him.
Gentleman he was. In the recognition of his quality as a man of
principle and breeding, Nataly was condemned by thoughts of Nesta’s
future to question whether word or act of hers should, if inclination
on both sides existed, stand between her girl and a true gentleman.
She counselled herself, as if the counsel were in requisition, to be
passive; and so doing, she more acutely than Victor--save in his chance
flashes--discerned the twist of her very nature caused by their false
position. And her panacea for ills, the lost little cottage, would not
have averted it: she would there have had the same coveting desire to
name a man of breeding, honour, station, for Nesta’s husband. Perhaps in
the cottage, choosing at leisure, her consent to see the brilliant young
creature tied to the best of dull men would have been unready, without
the girl to push it. For the Hon. Dudley was lamentably her pupil in
liveliness; he took the second part, as it is painful for a woman
with the old-fashioned ideas upon the leading of the sexes to behold;
resembling in his look the deaf, who constantly require to have an
observation repeated; resembling the most intelligent of animals, which
we do not name, and we reprove ourselves for seeing likeness.
Yet the likeness or apparent likeness would suggest that we have not so
much to fear upon the day of the explanation to him. Some gain is there.
Shameful thought! Nataly hastened her mind to gather many instances or
indications testifying to the sterling substance in young Mr. Sowerby,
such as a mother would pray for her son-in-law to possess. She
discovered herself feeling as the burdened mother, not providently for
her girl, in the choice of a mate. The perception was clear, and not the
less did she continue working at the embroidery of Mr. Sowerby on the
basis of his excellent moral foundations, all the while hoping, praying,
that he might not be lured on to the proposal for Nesta. But her
subservience to the power of the persuasive will in Victor--which was
like the rush of a conflagration--compelled her to think realizingly of
any scheme he allowed her darkly to read.
Opposition to him, was comparable to the stand of blocks of timber
before flame. Colney Durance had done her the mischief we take from the
pessimist when we are overweighted: in darkening the vision of external
aid from man or circumstance to one who felt herself mastered. Victor
could make her treacherous to her wishes, in revolt against them, though
the heart protested. His first conquest of her was in her blood, to
weaken a spirit of resistance. For the precedent of submission is a
charm upon the faint-hearted through love: it unwinds, unwills them.
Nataly resolved fixedly, that there must be a day for speaking; and
she had her moral sustainment in the resolve; she had also a tormenting
consciousness of material support in the thought, that the day was
not present, was possibly distant, might never arrive. Would Victor’s
release come sooner? And that was a prospect bearing resemblance to
hopes of the cure of a malady through a sharp operation.
These were matters going on behind the curtain; as wholly vital to her,
and with him at times almost as dominant, as the spiritual in memory,
when flesh has left but its shining track in dust of a soul outwritten;
and all their talk related to the purchase of furniture, the expeditions
to Lakelands, music, public affairs, the pardonable foibles of
friends created to amuse their fellows, operatic heroes and heroines,
exhibitions of pictures, the sorrows of Crowned Heads, so serviceable
ever to mankind as an admonition to the ambitious, a salve to the
envious!--in fine, whatsoever can entertain or affect the most social
of couples, domestically without a care to appearance. And so far they
partially--dramatically--deceived themselves by imposing on the world
while they talked and duetted; for the purchase of furniture from a
flowing purse is a cheerful occupation; also a City issuing out of
hospital, like this poor City of London, inspires good citizens to
healthy activity. But the silence upon what they were most bent on, had
the sinister effect upon Victor, of obscuring his mental hold of the
beloved woman, drifting her away from him. In communicating Fenellan’s
news through the lawyer Carling of Mrs. Burman’s intentions, he was
aware that there was an obstacle to his being huggingly genial,
even candidly genial with her, until he could deal out further
news, corroborative and consecutive, to show the action of things as
progressive. Fenellan had sunk into his usual apathy:--and might plead
the impossibility of his moving faster than the woman professing to
transform herself into, beneficence out of malignity;--one could
hear him saying the words! Victor had not seen him since last Concert
evening, and he deemed it as well to hear the words Fenellan’s mouth
had to say. He called at an early hour of the Westward tidal flow at the
Insurance Office looking over the stormy square of the first of Seamen.