The whole of my story seems to me to begin on the day when I stood,
closely guarded, before my judges, in the great circle of the people at
the Folk Moot of the men of Somerset gathered on the ancient hill of
Brent. All my life before that seems to have been as nothing, so quiet
and uneventful it was compared to what came after. I had grown from
boyhood to manhood in my father's great hall, on the little hill of
Cannington that looks out over the mouth of the river Parret to the blue
hills beyond. And there, when I was but two-and-twenty and long
motherless, I succeeded him as thane, and tried to govern my people as
well and wisely as he, that I too might die loved and honoured as he
died. And that life lasted but three years.
Maybe, being young and headstrong, I spoke at times, when the feasting
was over and the ale cup went round, too boldly of the things that were
beyond me, and dared, in my want of experience, to criticize the ways of
the king and his ordering of matters--thinking at the same time no
thought of disloyalty; for had anyone disparaged the king to myself my
sword would have been out to chastise the speaker in a moment. But, as
it ever is, what seems wrong in another may be passed over in oneself.
However that may be, it came to pass that Matelgar, the thane of Stert,
a rich and envious man, saw his way through this conceit of mine to his
own profit. For Egbert, the wise king, was but a few years dead, and it
was likely enough that some of the houses of the old seven kings might
dare to make headway against Ethelwulf his successor, and for a time the
words of men were watched, lest an insurrection might be made unawares.
I thought nothing of this, nor indeed dreamt that such a thing might be,
nor did one ever warn me.
My father and this Matelgar were never close friends, the open nature of
the one fitting ill with the close and grasping ways of the other. Yet,
when Matelgar spoke me fair at the rere-feast of my father's funeral,
and thereafter would often ride over and sup with me, I was proud to
think, in my foolishness, that I had won the friendship that my father
could not win, and so set myself even above him from whom I had learnt
all I knew of wisdom.
And that conceit of mine was my downfall. For Matelgar, as I was soon to
find out, encouraged my foolishness, and, moreover, brought in friends
and bought men of his, who, by flattering me, soon made themselves my
boon companions, treasuring up every word that might tell against me
when things were ripe.
Then at last, one day as I feasted after hunting the red deer on the
Quantocks, my steward came into my hall announcing messengers from the
king. They followed close on his heels, and I, who had seen nothing of
courts, wondered that so many armed men should be needed in a peaceful
hall, and yet watched them as one watches a gay show, till some fifty
men of the king's household lined my hall and fifty more blocked the
doorway. My people watched too, and I saw a smile cross from one of
Matelgar's men to another, but thought no guile.
Then one came forward and arrested me in the king's name as a traitor,
and I drew my sword on him, telling him he lied in giving me that name,
calling too on my men to aid me. But they were overmatched, and dared
not resist, for the swords of the king's men were out, and, moreover, I
saw that Matelgar's men were weaponless. He himself was not with me, and
still I had no thought of treachery.
So the end was that I was pinioned from behind and bound, and taken away
that night to where I knew not. Only, wherever it was, I was kept in
darkness and chains, maddened by the injustice of the thing and my own
helplessness, till I lost count of days, and at last hope itself. And
all that time the real reason for my arrest, and for the accusation that
caused it, never entered my mind, and least of all did I suspect that
Matelgar, my friend, was at the bottom of it. Indeed, I hoped at first
that, hearing of my trouble, he would interfere and procure my release,
till, as I say, hope was gone.
It was March when I was taken to prison. It was into broad May sunshine
and greenness that I was brought out by my surly jailers at last, set,
half blind with the darkness of the prison, on a good horse, and so,
with my hands bound behind me, led off in the midst of a strong guard to
the place of my trial.
Then, as mind and feeling came back to me with the fresh air and
springtime warmth, I knew the place we were leaving: It was the castle
of a friend of Matelgar--and that seemed strange to me, for I had been
hardly treated, seeing none save the men who fed me and saw that my
chains were kept secure. Then I looked in the faces of my guards, but
all were unknown to me. As I had not before been to that castle as a
guest, I was not surprised, and I said nothing to them, for I had found
the uselessness of question and entreaty when I spoke at the first to
the jailers.
So, silently, we rode on, and the world looked very fair to me after the
long grayness of the prison walls.
One who knows the west country, hunting through it as I have hunted,
grows to love and recognize the changing shapes of every hill and coombe
and spur of climbing forest on their sides, and so, before long, I knew
we were making for the great hill of Brent, but why I could not tell.
Then we crossed Parret river, and I watched a salmon leap as we did so;
and then on over the level marshes till I could see that the wide circle
on Brent top was black with swarming people. Often enough, as the cloud
shadows passed from them, arms and bright armour sparkled in the
sunlight among the crowd; and then I could have wept, having no arms or
harness left me, for often when aforetime I rode free I would take a
childish pleasure in seeing the churls blink and shade their eyes as I
flashed on them, and would wonder, too, if my weapons shone as my
father's shone as we rode side by side on some sunny upland.
Then, when we came under the hill of Brent, the hum of voices came down
to us, for the day was still, and my guards straightened themselves in
the saddle and set their ranks more orderly. But I, clad as I was in the
rags of the finery I had worn at the feast whence I was taken, shrank
within myself, ashamed to meet the gazes that must be turned on me
presently, for I saw that we were going on up the steep ascent to mix
with the crowd on the summit of the great knoll.
Now, by this time the long ride had brought back my senses to me, and I
began to take more thought for myself and what might be meant by this
journey. At first I had been so stunned and dazed by the release--as
my removal from the dungeon seemed to me--that I had been content to
feel the light and air play about me once more; but that strangeness had
worn off now, and the consciousness of being yet a prisoner took hold of
me.
My guards had ridden silent, either in obedience to command, or because
a Saxon is not often given to talk when under some responsibility, so
that I had learnt nothing from them thus far. But as we turned our
horses' heads up the steep, a longing at last came over me to speak, and
I turned to a gray-bearded man who had ridden silently at my right hand
all the morning and asked him plainly whither he was taking me, and for
answer he pointed up the hill, saying nothing.
Then I asked him why I must be taken there, and, grimly enough, he
replied in two words, "For trial", and so I knew that the Great Moot [i]
was summoned, and that presently I should know the whole meaning of this
thing that had befallen me. Then my spirits began to rise, for, being
conscious of no wrongdoing, I looked forward to speedy release with full
proof of innocence.
Then I began to look about me and to note the crowds of people whom the
Moot had gathered. So many and various were these that I and my guards
passed with little notice among those who toiled up the hill with us,
the crowd growing thicker as we neared the edge of the first great
square platform on the hilltop. And when we reached this, my guards
reined up to breathe their horses, for Brent has from this first
platform a yet steeper rise to the ancient circle on the very summit.
Men say that both platform and circle are the work of the Welsh, whom
our Saxon forefathers drove out and enslaved, but however this may be,
they were no idle workmen who raised the great earthworks that are there.
All the many acres of that great platform were covered with wagons and
carts, and everywhere were set booths and tents, and in them men and
women were eating and drinking, having come from far. There were, too,
shows of every kind to beguile the hours of waiting or to tempt the
curious, for many of the people, thralls and unfree men, had taken
holiday with their masters, and had come to see the Moot, though they
had no part in the business thereof.
So there were many gaily-dressed tumblers and dancers, jugglers and
gleemen, each with a crowd round them. But among these crowds were few
freemen, so that I judged that the Moot was set, and that they were
gathered on the higher circle that was yet before us to be climbed.
I had been on Brent once or twice before, but then it had been deserted,
and my eyes had had time and inclination to look out over the wide view
of hill and plain and sea and distant Welsh mountains beyond that. Now I
thought nothing of these things, but looked up to where it seemed that I
must be judged. I could make out one or two banners pitched and floating
idly in the sunshine, and one seemed to have a golden cross at its stave
head; but I could make out none of the devices on them, and so I looked
idly back on the crowd again. And then men brought us food and ale, and
at last, after some gruff talk among themselves, the guards untied my
hands, though they left my feet bound under the saddle girths, and bade
me help myself.
Nor was I loth to eat heartily, with the freshness of the ride on me,
and with the hope of freedom strong in my heart.
Then we waited for an hour or more, and the sun began to slope westward,
and my guards seemed to grow impatient. Still the crowds did not thin,
and if one group of performers ceased another set began their antics.
At last a richly-clad messenger came towards us, the throng making hasty
way for him, and spoke to the leader of our party. Then, following him,
we rode to the foot of the great mound, and there dismounted. And now
they bound my hands again, and if I asked them to forbear I cannot well
remember, but I think I did so in vain. For my mind was in a great
tumult as we climbed the hill, wondering and fearing and hoping all at
once, and longing to see who were my judges, and to have this matter
ended once for all.
We passed, I think, two groups coming down from some judgment given, and
of these I know one contained a guarded and ironed man with a white, set
face; and the other was made up of people who smiled and talked rapidly,
leading one who had either gained a cause or had been acquitted. There
were perhaps other people who met us or whom we passed, but these are
the two I remember of them all. Then we gained the summit and stood
there waiting for orders, as it seemed, and I could look round on all
the ring.
And at first I seemed to be blinded by the brilliance of that assembly,
for our Saxon folk love bright array and fair jewellery on arm and neck.
Men sat four and six deep all round the great circle, leaving only the
gap where we should enter; and right opposite that gap seemed the place
of honour, for there were a score or more of chairs set, each with a
thane thereon, and in the midst of them sat those behind whom the
banners were raised. Near us at this end of the circle were the lesser
freemen, and so round each bend of the ring to right and left in order
of rank till those thanes were reached who were highest.
Before those stood some disputants, as it seemed, and I could not see
the faces of the seated thanes clearly at first. But presently I knew
the banners--they were those of Eanulf the Ealdorman, and of Ealhstan
the Bishop. And when I saw the first I feared, for the great ealdorman
was a stern and pitiless man, from all I had ever heard; but when I knew
that banner with the golden cross above it, my heart was lighter, for
all men loved and spoke well of the bishop.
It seemed long before that trial was over; but at last the men ceased
speaking, and the thanes seemed to take counsel upon it; and then Eanulf
pronounced judgment, and the men sat down in their places in the ring,
for it was, as one could tell, some civil dispute of boundary, or road,
or the like which had been toward.
Then there was a silence for a space, until the ealdorman rose and spoke
loudly, for all the great ring to hear.
"There is one more case this day that must come before this Moot, and
that is one which brings shame on this land of ours. That one from among
the men of Somerset should speak ill of Ethelwulf the King, and plot
against him, is not to be borne. But that all men may know and fear the
doom that shall be to such an one, he has been brought for trial by the
Moot, with full proof of his guilt in this matter, that Somerset itself,
as it were, should pronounce his sentence."
Now, when the assembly heard that, a murmur went round, and, as it
seemed to me, of surprise mixed with wrath. And I myself felt the same
for the moment--but then the eyes of all turned in a flash upon me--
and I remembered the accusation that had been brought against me, and I
knew that it was I of whom Eanulf spoke. Then shame fell on me, to give
place at once to anger, and I think I should have spoken hotly, but that
at some sign from the ealdorman, my guards laid hold of me, and led me
across the open space and set me before him and the bishop.
But as he with the others laid hands on me, that gray-bearded man, who
had answered me when I asked my one question, whispered hastily in my
ear, "Be silent and keep cool."
I would he were alive now; but that might not be. And I knew not then
why he thus spoke, unless he had known and loved my father.
So I stood before those two judges and looked them in the face; and then
one moved uneasily in his seat to their left, and my eyes were drawn to
him. It was Matelgar, and, as I saw him, I smiled for I thought him a
friend at least; but he looked not at me. Then from him I turned to seek
the face of some other whom I might know. And I saw thanes, friends of
my father, whom I had not cared to seek; and of these some frowned on
me, but some looked pityingly, as I thought, though it was but for a
moment that my eyes might leave the faces of those two judges before me.
Now, were it not that when I go over what followed my heart still rises
up again in a wrath and mad bitterness that I fain would feel no more, I
would tell all of that trial, if trial one could call it, where there
was none to speak for the accused, and every word was against him.
And in that trial I myself took little part by word or motion, standing
there and listening as though the words spoken of me concerned another,
as indeed, they might well have done.
But first Eanulf spoke to me, bending his brows as he did so, and
frowning on me.
"Heregar, son of Herewulf the Thane, you are accused by honourable men
of speaking evil of our Lord the King, Ethelwulf. What answer have you
to make to this charge? And, moreover, you are further charged with
conspiring against him--can you answer to that charge?"
Then I was about to make loud and angry denial of these accusations, but
that old guard of mine, who yet held my shoulder, gripped it tightly,
and I remembered his words, so that in a flash it came to me that an
innocent man need but deny frankly, as one who has no fear, and I looked
Eanulf in the face and answered him.
"Neither of these charges are true, noble Eanulf; nor know I why they
are brought against me, or by whom. Let them speak--there are those
here who will answer for my loyalty."
Now, as I spoke thus quietly, Eanulf's brows relaxed, and I saw, too,
that the bishop looked more kindly on me. Eanulf spoke again.
"Know you not by whom these charges are brought?"
"Truly, I know not, Lord Eanulf," I answered, "for no man may say these
things of me, save he lies."
"Have you enemies?" he asked.
"None known to me," I told him truthfully, for I had, as my father,
lived at peace with all.
"Then is the testimony of those against you the heavier," said the
ealdorman.
And with that he turned to the bishop before I could make reply; and
they spoke together for a while in Latin, which I knew not.
So I looked to my friend Matelgar for comfort, but he seemed to see me
not, looking away elsewhere. And I thought him plainly troubled for me,
for his face was white, and the hand on which his chin rested was
turning the ends of his beard between his teeth, so that he bit it--as
I had seen him do before when in doubt or perplexity.
As I watched him, the bishop spoke in Saxon, saying that it would be
well to call the accusers first and hear them, that I might make such
reply as was possible to me.
"For," said he, "it seems to me that this Heregar speaks truth in saying
that he knows not his accusers."
Then Eanulf bowed gravely, and all the circle was hushed, for a little
talk had murmured round as these two spoke in private.
And now I will forbear, lest the rage and shame of it should get the
mastery of me again, and I should again think and speak things for which
(as once before, at the bidding of the man I love best on earth) I must
do long penance, if that may avail. For, truly, I forgave once, and I
would not recall that forgiveness. Yet I must tell somewhat.
Eanulf bade the accusers stand forward and give their evidence; and
slowly, and, as it were, unwillingly, rose Matelgar, my friend, as I had
deemed him, and behind him a score of those friends of his who had kept
me company for long days on moor and in forest, and had feasted in my hall.
Again that warning grasp on my shoulder, and I thought that surely
either I or they had mistaken the summons, and that my defenders had
come forward.
Then, as in a dream, I listened to words that I will not recall, making
good those accusations. And through all that false witness there seemed
to me to run, as it were, a thread of those foolish, boy-wise words of
mine that had, and meant, no harm, but on which were now built mountains
of seeming proof. So that, when at last all those men had spoken I was
dumb, and knew that I had no defence. For no proof of loyalty had I to
give--for proof had never been required of me. And a man may live a
quiet life, and yet conspire most foully.
As my accusers went back to their seats there ran a murmur among the
folk, and then a silence fell. The level afternoon sun seemed to blaze
on me alone, while to me the air seemed thick and close, and full of
whispers.
Ealhstan the Bishop broke the silence.
"The proof is weighty, and Matelgar the Thane is an honourable man," he
said, sadly enough; "but if a man conspires, there needs must be one
other, at least, in the plot. Surely we have heard little of this."
Then was added more evidence. And men proved lonely journeys of mine,
with evasion of notice thereof, and disavowal of the same. Yet I thought
that Matelgar the Thane knew of my love for Alswythe, his daughter, whom
I would meet, as lovers will meet, unobserved if they may, in all honour.
Yet, as I listened, it was of these meetings they spoke, saying only
that I had been able to concord whom I met, and where, though Matelgar
must have known it. When that was finished, Eanulf bade me call men to
disprove these things. And I could not. For my accusers were my close
companions, and of Alswythe I would not speak, and I must fain hold my
peace.
Only, after a silence, I could forbear no longer, and cried:
"Will none speak for me?"
Then one by one my father's friends rose and told what they knew of my
boyhood and training; but of these last few years of my manhood they,
alas for my own folly could not speak. What they might they did, and my
heart turned to them in gratitude for a little, though Matelgar's
treachery had seemed to make it a stone within me.
They ended, and the silence came again. It seemed long, and weighed on
me like a thunderstorm in the air, nor should I have started had the
whole assembly broken into one thunderclap of hatred of me. But instead
of that, came the calm voice of Ealhstan the Bishop:
"Eanulf and freemen of Somerset, there is one who witnesses for this
Heregar more plainly than all these. That witness is himself, in his
youth and inexperience. What are the wild words a boy will say? Who will
plot against a mighty king with a boy for partner? What weight have his
words? What help can come from his following? It seems to me that
Matelgar the Thane and these friends of his might well have laughed away
all these foolishnesses, rather than hoard them up to bring before this
solemn council. This, too, I hold for injustice, that one should be kept
in ward till his trial, unknowing of all that is against him, unhelped
by the counsel of any freeman, and unable to send word to those who
should stand by him at his trial. Indeed, this thing must be righted, I
tell you, before England is a free land."
At that there went a sound of assent round the Moot, and it seems to me,
looking back, that that trial of mine, hard as it was to bear, was yet
the beginning of good to all the land, by reason of those words which it
taught the bishop to say, and which found an abiding place in the hearts
of the honest men who heard; so that in these days of Alfred, our wise
king, they have borne fruit.
Then Eanulf signed to my guards, and they led me away and over the brow
of the hill, that the Moot might speak its mind on me. There my guards
bade me sit down, and I did so, resting head on hands, and thinking of
nought, as it seemed to me, until suddenly rose up hate of Matelgar, and
of Eanulf, and of all that great assembly, and of all the world.
There was an earthquake once when I was but a boy, and never could I
forget how it was as though all things one had deemed solid and secure
had suddenly become treacherous as Severn ooze. And now it was to me as
though an earthquake had shaken my thoughts of men. For, till that day,
never had I found cause to distrust anyone who was friend of mine. Now
could I trust none.
Then rose up in my mind the image of Alswythe, fair, and blue eyed, and
brown haired, smiling at me as she was wont. And I deemed her, too,
false, as having tricked me to meet her that this might come upon me.
Well it was that they called me back into the ring to hear my doom, for
such thoughts as these will drive a man to madness. Now must I think for
myself again, and meet what must be. Yet I would look at no man as I
went towards the place of my judges, and stood before them with my eyes
cast down. For I was beaten, and cared no more for aught.
Eanulf spoke; but he had no anger in his voice and it seemed as though
he repeated the words of others.
"Heregar, son of Herewulf," he said, "these things have been brought
against you by honourable men, and you cannot disprove them--hardly
can you deny them. They may not be passed over; yet for the sake of your
youth, and for the pleading of Ealhstan, our Bishop, your doom shall be
lighter than some think fit. Death it might be; but that shall not pass
now on you, or for this. But Thane you may be no longer, and we do
confirm that sentence. Landless also you must be, as unworthy to hold
it. Outlaw surely must he be who plots against the Head of law."
He paused a moment, and then said:
"This, then, is your doom. Outlawed you are from this day forward, but
wolf's head [ii] you shall not be. None in all Wessex shalt harbour you
or aid you, but none shall you harm, save you harm them. Go hence from
this place and from this land, to some land where no man knows you; and
so shall you rest again."
Now, had I not been blinded with rage and shame, I might have seen that
there was mercy in this sentence, and hope also. For I had seen a man
outlawed once, and given a day's start, like some wild beast, in which
to fly from the hand of every man that would seek his life. But I was to
be safe from such harm, and but that I must go hence, I was not to be
hounded forth, nor was my shame to be published beyond Wessex. So that
all the other kingdoms lay open and safe to me.
None of this I heeded; I only knew that my enemies had got the mastery,
and that ruin was upon me. So I ground my teeth and was mute.
Then they cut my bonds and I stood free, but cared not. Nor did I stir
from my place; and a look of surprise crossed Eanulf's face. But
Ealhstan the Bishop, knowing well, I think, what was in my mind, rose
from his seat, and came to me, laying his hands on my shoulders. I would
have shaken them off; but be kept them there gently, and spoke to me.
"Heregar, my son," he said, and his words were like the cool of a shower
after heat, to my burning brain, "be not cast down in the day of your
trouble overmuch. There are yet things for you to do in this world of
ours, and the ways of men are not all alike. Foolish you have been,
Heregar, my son, but the Lord who gave wisdom to Solomon the youth, will
give to you, if you will ask Him. Go your way in peace, and if you will
heed my words, take your trouble to some wise man of God, and so be led
by his counsel. And, Heregar," and here the bishop's voice was for me
alone, "if you need forgiveness, forgive if there is aught by you to be
forgiven."
Then I knew that the bishop, at least, believed in my innocence, and my
hard heart bent before him, though my body would not. He laid his hand
on my head for one moment, and so left me.
One of my father's old friends rose up and said:
"Ealdorman, he is unarmed. Give him that which will keep him from wanton
attack, or from the wolves, even if it be but a thrall's weapons."
Eanulf signed assent.
On that they gave me a woodman's billhook, and a seax, [iii] such as the
churls wear, and one thrust a good ash, iron-shod quarterstaff into my
hands. Then my guards led me away from the assembly, and set my face
towards the downward path. Once again the old man spoke to me with words
of good counsel.
"Keep up heart, master. Make for Cornwall, and turn viking with the next
Danes who come."
I would not answer him, but walked down the hill a little. Then the
bitterness of my heart overcame me, and I turned, and shaking my staff
up at the hill, cursed the Moot deeply.
So I went--an outlaw.