powerfully affected by the "broad and general casing air," that it
expands or contracts according to the condition of the atmosphere, and
thus we find when there is any considerable change in the temperature,
that all the book-cases, wardrobes, chests of drawers, clothes presses,
tables, or "what-nots," in different parts of the house, will indicate
this change by a _creaking_, cracking noise. I have in my studio an
oaken cabinet, which acts under the influence of the change of air,
like a talking thermometer, and with which I sometimes hold a sort of a
"_cabinet_ council" upon the subject of the change of weather. When
seated in my room, with doors, and windows, and shutters shut, if it
has been dry weather for any length of time, and my cabinet begins
creaking, I know by this sound from the wood, that the warm moist air,
which has been wafted with the warm gulf stream from the West Indies,
is diffusing itself around the room, and producing an effect upon me
and my furniture, even to the fire-irons and fender, and so, on the
contrary, after wet or moist weather, if the creaking is heard again, I
know pretty well "which way the wind blows," and that it is a dry wind,
without looking out at the weather vane. If it merely goes _creak,
creak, crack_, and stops there, the change will not be great, but when
it goes _cre-ak, cre-ak, creak, crack, crack, crack--rumble, rumble,
rumble, creak, crack_! then do I know, and find, that the _change_ will
be _considerable_, and can _spell_ out, change--rain--rain--rain, much
rain.
Many persons who have given any thought to this question, are of
opinion that electric currents passing from the human body is the cause
of this "table-moving," and I introduce my "weather wise" cabinet to
the public here to show, that if a _little damp air_, or a _little dry
air_ will _move_, and _make_ a _large heavy cabinet_ talk in this way,
how much more likely it is that a _table_ should be moved, and
particularly if these "electric currents" fly "like lightning" through
the passages or spiracles of this popular, but at present mysterious
piece of furniture.
No wonder then if the "life sphere" and "the atmosphere" of the
"light-headed," "light-heeled," who "_permeate their wills_" into this
otherwise inanimate object, should all of a sudden "set the table in a
roar," and "rap out their rappartees," and that "the _head_ of the
table" should bob up and down, so as to make the people stare, either
standing around or stuck in a chair, and that the legs all so clumsy,
should caper and dance and kick up in the air, to the tune of "Well did
_you_ ever!" and "Well _I_ declare!" _!!!_
This cabinet of mine is filled with the spirited works of departed
spirits, including some of my dear father's humorous works, also of the
great Hogarth, the great Gilray, and other masters, ancient and modern;
the mediums would, I suppose, say--
That when this cabinet begins a "crack"[8] or creaking,
It is these sprites of art, who thus to me are speaking.
[8] Scotch for talking.
And as one of the panels was _split_ some years back, the mediums would
perhaps suggest that these "_droll_ spirits" made the cabinet "_split_
its sides with laughter," but _I_ know it was the _hot air_ of a hot
summer, and certainly not done by a drum or a drummer--that this
"splitting" or "flying," only shows the _force_ of the _common air_,
and I hope adds to the force of my argument in this respect, and
further, of this I feel assured, that if I were to "clear the decks for
action," bring this cabinet out into the middle of my studio, and could
induce some of the lady and gentlemen "mediums" to come and form a
"circle," and clap their hands on and around this piece of furniture,
that, although Monsieur Cabinet has no "light fantastic toe," that he
would nevertheless join in the merry dance, and cut some curious capers
on his castors, and even "beat time" perhaps with his curious creaks
and cracks. By the by, glass being a non-conductor, a table made of
_glass_, would at once settle this question, as to whether the tables
are moved by electric currents or not.
I am now about to suggest what I feel assured every one will admit to
be a GRAND IDEA, and which would be to make these spirits useful in a
way that would be highly appreciated and patronized by the public, and
put all the "fortune-tellers" and "rulers of the stars" out of the
field altogether, and perhaps even damage the "electric wires" a
little. It is to establish a company, to be entitled, "THE HUMAN
QUESTION AND SPIRIT ANSWER COMPANY!" The principal "_capital_" to work
upon, would be the overpowering principle of curiosity; in this case,
instead of having a "_chair_-man," they would, I suppose, have a
_table_-man; if so, then Homo would be the _man_, and of this company
it never could be said, that they had _not_ a _rap_ at their bankers.
"Limited," of course, but the _business_ would be UN-_limited_, with
profits, corresponding; branch question and answer offices, branching
out all over the globe, with "letter-boxes" and "chatter-boxes". If the
business of such offices were worked and carried out in a "_proper
spirit_," it would assuredly be "a success." I am supposing, of course,
that these spirits will be able to "tell us something we don't know,"
for up to the present time it does not appear that they have told
anything to us that we could not have told them, and in a more common
sense and grammatical style than most of the communications which they
have "rapped out," but if there are any _real_, great, and good spirits
amongst these gammocking table-turners, they must, one would suppose,
know all about everything and everybody, and everybody would be asking
questions, and if so, "Oh, my!" what a lot of funny questions there
would be! and what a lot of funny answers! (_all_ "_private_ and
_confidential_," of _course_) as nobody would be sure not to tell
nobody any secrets that nobody wanted anybody to know.
Under ordinary circumstances I am not at all what might be called a
_curious_ person, but although I should (like other people) like to
know how certain matters might turn out, and although I should never
think of asking a "fortune-teller" or of consulting the gentry who
profess to "rule the stars," yet if such a company as this were
started, I feel that I should be compelled to start off to the first
office I could get to, for the purpose of putting two or three
questions, to which I want immediate answers if it were possible, and
should not mind paying something extra for _favourable_ answers. I will
here just give a specimen of some of these questions.
Some literary gentleman and others belonging to the "Urban Club," and
also some members of the "Dramatic Authors'" Society, have formed
themselves in a committee (upon which they have done me the honour to
place my name), for the purpose of setting on foot and assisting to
raise a fund, if possible, to erect a monument in honour of William
Shakspeare, as the 23rd of April, 1864, will be the ter-centenary of
that poet's birthday. Another committee for the same purpose is also in
formation, and the two committees will either amalgamate or work
together. I have suggested to the first committee that in order to
assist the funds for the above-mentioned purpose, that a notice be sent
out to the public to this effect--that all persons having any works of
art, either paintings, drawings, or sculpture, should be invited and
respectfully requested to lend such works to a committee of artists, to
form a gallery or national collection illustrating this author's works,
to be called "The Shakspeare Exhibition," and in which designs for the
said monument could also be exhibited. The question, therefore, I would
put to the _spirits_ through the proper _medium_ would be this,
viz.--If such invitations were sent out, would the holders of such
works lend them for the purpose of thus being placed before the public?
And further--If the Government were applied to, would they "lend the
loan" of a proper and fitting building to exhibit the various works in?
And a little further, and "though last not least," would the nobility
and gentry, and the public at large, patronize such an exhibition
_largely_, and what the receipts would amount to? I should like to have
all this answered, and that at an early day. But as it may be a _long
day_, before such a company could get into working order, and as the
members of the public press are a good-natured, shrewd class of
spirits--if the idea is worth anything, they would most likely take it
up, and I should be as much pleased to get an answer through that
_medium_ as any other that I know of.
There are several other questions which I should put to this "_Spirit_
Answer Company" if it were started, and which I feel that I could not
well put to any one else, as I do not think that _any body_ would give
themselves the trouble to give me an answer; and it is not _every body_
who _could_ give me satisfactory answers, however much they might feel
disposed to do so. I enumerate two or three.
Firstly--After a dreadful railway accident which occurred the other
day, Lord Brougham in the House of Lords suggested, I believe, that an
act of Parliament should be passed compelling the _public_ to travel at
a rational speed; and as civil engineers declare that if the _public_
would be content to do so, that it would decrease the risk of life to
about 999 per cent., I want to know if the _public_ are ever likely to
adopt the moderate speed, or sort of safe and sure, mode of travelling
by rail, instead of _flying_ along at such a risk of life and limb as
they do now, occasionally coming to a _dreadful smash_, with an awful
unnecessary sacrifice of life, picking up the bodies or the pieces
thereof, crying out "All right, go a-head," and dashing off at the same
irrational speed with the probability of the like accidents again?
Secondly--If it is at all likely that "lovely woman" will ever leave
off wearing dresses which constantly expose her to the risk of being
burnt to death?
Upon looking, however, at some of the other questions, they appear so
frivolous and ridiculous, that I do not think I would put them even to
these spirits. For instance, one was, that supposing I took a part in
one of Shakspeare's plays, for the purpose of assisting this proposed
Shakspearian fund, and for some other purposes, if, as I can draw a
little, should I, under such circumstances, _draw_ a full house?
There is a common saying amongst schoolboys, that "IF all _ifs_ were
_hads_, and all _hads_ were _Shads_, we never should be in want of fish
for supper." Now the _if_, in this _spirit_ question, is an important
_if_, for IF _all be true_, that is asserted by the "mediums" of the
marvels which they publish, then are those marvels some of the most
marvellous and astounding wonders that have ever been known or heard of
in the _authentic_ history of the world. And from the extent to which
this belief has spread, and is still spreading, and also from the
injurious effects it has already produced, and is likely still further
to produce, on the mental and physical condition of a large number of
the people, it now becomes rather, indeed, I may say, a, _very_ serious
question. Some of the effects produced by attending the _soirees_ of
these "good, bad, and indifferent" spirits, will be seen from the
reasons stated by a staunch supporter of these supernatural pastimes
for giving up--in fact, being COMPELLED to give up--_seances_,
"because, in the first place (he states), it was _too exhausting_ to
the vital fluids of the medium." (They took too long a pull, or
swallowed too much of his "_atmosphere_.") And also "because the
necessity of keeping the mind elevated to a higher state of
contemplation, while we were repeating the alphabet and receiving
messages letter by letter, was too great a strain upon our faculties;
and because the undeveloped and earth-bound spirits throng about the
mediums, and struggle to enter into parley with them, apparently with
the purpose of getting possession of their natures, or exchanging
natures; and I have heard of sittings terminating from this cause in
cases of PARALYSIS or DEMONIACAL POSSESSION."
In such a state, no doubt the poor creatures imagine that they see
apparitions. I had an old friend who was affected with paralysis of the
brain, but not from this cause, as he was a total and _decided
disbeliever_ in apparitions; but from the diseased condition of his
brain he had the _appearance_ of a person or ghost constantly by his
side for a considerable time, at which he used to laugh, and which I
wanted him to introduce to me; but to me it was always invisible. One
day at dinner he stood up, and said to those present, "Don't you see
I'm going?" and fell down--dead!
Although there is much to laugh at with respect to these modern
spirits, although some of the scenes at the _seances_ are perfectly
ridiculous--and would have afforded capital subjects for the powerful
pen of my dear deceased friend, "Thomas Ingoldsby"--the "raps" rapped
out sometimes are positive nonsense and sometimes positive falsehood;
and "evil communications," which all who have been to school know,
"corrupt good manners," yet, on the other hand, there are serious
symptoms sometimes attended with serious consequences.
The mediums tell us that these spiritual manifestations are permitted
by the "OMNIPOTENT;" that JESUS CHRIST sanctions some of these
spiritual communications, and are indeed given us as if proceeding from
Himself; and yet we find that some persons who attend these "_seances_"
have their nervous system so shaken as to distort their limbs, in fact,
lose the use of their limbs altogether, or are "driven raving mad!"
In "The Light in the Valley," a work which I consider ought to be
entitled "_Darkness_ in the Valley," but which I must do the author the
justice to say is written and edited in what is evidently intended as a
profound, proper, and religions spirit, and with a good intent; but
however sincere and honest those pious feelings may be, they are
nevertheless _distorted_ religious opinions, containing symbolical
ideas as dark as any symbolical emanations ever given forth in the
darkest ages.
In this work specimens are given of "_spirit writing_" and "_spirit
drawing_." The "spirit writing" consists of unmeaning, unintelligible
scribbling scrawls, and very rarely containing any letters or words.
These productions are ascribed to a "spirit _hand_" seizing and guiding
the medium's _hand_, but which is nothing more than involuntary action
of the muscles under an excited and unnatural state of the nervous
system; and the spirit drawings are executed under similar conditions.
The drawings profess to be designed and conjointly executed in this
way, by _holy_ spirits or _angels_, and are given as _sacred_ guidances
to man. These are the medium's opinions and belief; but, unfortunately,
too many of these sort of drawings may be seen in certain asylums. But
if I know anything of religion, which I have been looking at carefully
and critically for half a century; also if I know anything of designing
and drawing, in which profession I have been working in my humble way
for more than that time, I pronounce these spirit drawings (in the
language of art) to be "out of drawing," and contrary to all healthy
emanations of thought as design and composition; and instead of
representing subjects or figures which would convey a proper and great
idea of Divine attributes, are, in fact, caricatures of such sacred
subjects.
I shall here give a few extracts from the communication of these false
spirits, and spiritual explanations of these spirit scrawls and
scratches; but some which I had intended to insert, upon reflection, I
refrain from giving, believing that they would not only be offensive to
sensible religious persons, but injurious to youthful minds. Some of
the illustrations given in this book are furnished by a "drawing
medium," under the titles of "Christ without Hands," "the Bearded
Christ," "Christ among the Sphere," "the Woman Crucified," etc., etc.
In the first of these something like a figure is scribbled in, and
surrounded with scratches, called spirit writing; the "Bearded Christ"
is merely a bust, very badly drawn, and produced in the same unnatural
way, and surrounded by the same sort of scribbling. The _shape_ of the
beard and the _atmosphere_ of the beard are, it appears, most important
matters; and the author, in speaking of this, says, in describing Him,
"In 'the Bearded Christ' the atmosphere of the beard, as well as the
beard itself, is represented; and I am acquainted with a '_seeing_
medium,' who has seen the beard-atmosphere, not only when the beard is
worn, but about the shaven chin, with sufficient precision to decide of
what shape the beard would be were it allowed to grow"!!! !!! !!! !!!
!!!
The subject professing to represent "Christ among the Spheres" is a
better and more finished drawing; but, according to all the laws and
rules of proportion, the figure of Christ, by the side of our globe,
would be 30,000 miles in height, and a lily which he holds in his hand
15,000 miles long! All these gross absurdities show, that the _real_
spirit has nothing whatever to do with such absurd doctrines or
productions. This "drawing medium" gives an account of the trials and
sufferings, bodily and mental, which she went through before she became
an accomplished and complete medium; and, according to her own
statement, she must have gone through a most fearful and horrible
schooling. In one part it is stated she went through "_several months
of most painful bewilderment and extreme distress of mind_;" and in
another part she says that the intensest antagonism between TRUTH and
FALSEHOOD, between LIGHT and DARKNESS, encounters the astounded and
unprepared pilgrim upon his first entrance into the realm of spirit. "I
felt frequently as if enveloped in an atmosphere which sent through my
whole frame warm streams of electricity in waving spirals from the
crown of my head to the soles of my feet; and occasionally, generally
at midnight, I was seized with twitchings and convulsive movements of
my whole body, which were distressing beyond words. All these symptoms
at length came to a crisis in a FRIGHTFUL TRANCE." And this _drawing
medium_ signs herself "COMFORT!" and further states that--
"Waking in the night, the _strange_ drawing process instantly
commenced, and I felt and saw within me the figure of an angel, whose
countenance resembled that of Christ, descending from a morning sky
towards me, and bearing upon his shoulders a large cross, whilst from
his lips proceeded these words--'Love, mercy, peace, but not till after
death.' Again my soul _trembled with anguish_, for that strange
portentous word, '_death_,' was ever written within me or without. This
peculiar stage of development soon produced a singular affection of my
throat, an affection of the mucous membrane, which caused several times
a day, and especially when rising in the morning, the _most distressing
sensations_. After suffering thus for several days, the mysterious
writing informed me that I must take a _certain quantity of port wine_
every day, and then the sensation would leave me." And she adds, "I
followed the spiritual direction, and found almost immediate relief."
The spirit doctor, in fact, after the dreadful suffering the scholar
had gone through, prescribed a "drop of comfort," a drop of the spirit
of Alcohol, which spirit is very much like these rapping spirits,
_deceitful_ and _dangerous_, and this, we may presume, is the reason
why the medicine adopted the name of "comfort." Well, some people will
say that some little _comfort_ was needed after so much _dis_comfort
and suffering--but _why_, all this suffering? Cannot these spirit
drawing-masters instruct their pupils in this poor, wretched, miserable
style of drawing, without all this misery and punishment? If not, I
should think that very few ladies or gentlemen would like to take
lessons in drawing, or, indeed, in any other art, under such painful
circumstances. A _spirit_ drawing-master's card would, I presume, be
something like the following:--
[Illustration: TOM PAIN,
Drawing Master.
MEDIUM SPIRIT DRAWING TAUGHT, UNDER EXTREME TORTURE,
IN TWENTY-FOUR LESSONS, AT SO MUCH ILL-HEALTH
AND SUFFERING PER LESSON.
_N.B.--Private Residence_, UNDER _the Table_.
* * All the Drawing and Writing _Materials_ to be provided by
* the Pupils. The lashing supplied by the Spirit, and the Medical
Advice Gratis; but the Pupils to find the "drop of _spirit_
comfort" themselves.]
In taking one more extract from "Comfort," I hope that I am not giving
any discomfort to that "medium," who, from my _in_most heart I hope and
trust, is now enjoying that rational and natural comfort which all
well-wishers to their fellow-creatures wish strangers to feel, as well
as their friends. The medium proceeds to say:--"Ignorance of their real
nature and of their alternate purposes in the progress of civilization
and development of mind, has already caused _immense misery_ in many
directions, and will cause more and more, even infinitely worse, until
the time arrives that the medical world will follow the example of Dr.
Garth Wilkinson in his valuable pamphlet on the treatment of _lunacy_
through _spiritualism_, and calmly regard this growing development not
as insanity, but as a _key whereby to unlock insanity_"!!!
I have not the slightest notion of what this pamphlet contains, but
from the above very _un_comfortable opinion expressed by "Comfort" upon
this matter, it seems to me that a sufficient "_key_" is here given to
unlock, if not all, at all events, the greater part of the mysteries of
this _spirit drawing_ and _spirit writing_, and, indeed, the whole of
this spirit movement.
I would here call the attention of the medical world to the way in
which the spirits are acting towards that body. I presume that they are
the spirits of deceased members of the profession; and if so they are
acting in a most unbrotherly, underhanded manner, in fact, undermining
the profession altogether by "rapping" out prescriptions from _under
the table_, for which they do not take a "rap" as a fee. Yes, "advice
gratis" for nothing. I entreat medical men not to smile at my remarks,
for they may be assured that there is a dark conspiracy--I cannot say
"afoot," because spirits have no feet--but I may say in hand; and as
matters stand at present, it looks as if "THE D. _without_ the M., and
DR. FAUSTUS" had entered into a partnership to destroy all medical
doctors by introducing a system which they could not only not practise,
but, as far as I am able to judge, could never understand, and which,
though it is given in the "_Light_ in the Valley," "_read_" they may,
and "_mark_" they may, "_learn_" they cannot, and "inwardly DIGEST"
they never will.
In the concluding pages of the "Light in the Valley," a letter is
introduced, which is evidently written by a highly-educated person, in
support of "an occult law," and from all that is stated in this letter
the writer might as well have said at once, I believe in witchcraft, or
that craft which enables an ignorant old woman, who is called a
"witch," to make contracts with the Evil One, for the purpose of
torturing, or making miserable for life, or destroying unto death, her
neighbours, their children, or their cattle; and that an ignorant old
man, under the name of a "wizard," may do the same; also, in astrology,
or "ruling the stars," to predict coming events, or the future fate of
individuals born at particular periods of the year, according to the
position of the stars at that time; or in "fortune-telling," performed
either by "crossing the hand" with a piece of money, got out of some
simpleton's pocket for that purpose, but which never gets back there
again; or by bits of paper, called "cards;" to which also may be added,
as a matter of course, I believe in ghosts, hobgoblins, and in
everything of a supernatural character.
We can readily understand why the ignorant and uneducated believe in
all these matters; the cause is traced and known; but it seems almost
impossible to believe that educated persons, even with a small amount
of reflection, can put their faith in such superstitious delusions; and
if the question is put to such persons, as "show us any good" resulting
in the existence of an "occult law," we may safely defy any one to show
_one instance, where any good has ever resulted from such a belief_ in
what they term the deep "arcana of Nature's book," or rather unnatural
nonsense. Whereas, on the other hand, the amount of evil arising from
this source has been fearfully great, and the murders many; dragging
poor old creatures through ponds, and hanging them, and even torturing
them to death in a way too disgusting to describe. Our own records are,
unfortunately, too massive of such ignorant and savage atrocities; but
not only were such deeds enacted in this (at that time) so misnamed
Christian land, but also in other countries denominated Christian; but
which title their brutal acts gave them, like ourselves, no right to
assume; not only in Europe, but also in America. In that country, about
the year 1642, many poor old women were persecuted to death. One woman
was hung at Salem for bewitching four children, and the eldest daughter
afterwards confessed to the tricks that she and her sisters had played
in pretending to be "bewitched."