NOT WITH EYE-SERVICE.
"WHY, Fanny, you must surely be bringing good news!" exclaimed Mrs.
Crook, as she caught sight of the girl's face. "You look quite bright.
Is Miss Lawton better?"
Truly the girl's countenance shone with a new light, yet her tears
seemed about to flow again at her mistress's question.
"She is not really better, ma'am, only she is not in so much pain now.
In that way, the doctors say the worst is over, but there is no hope
of her getting better. She may live for weeks, but she will gradually
wear away; but, oh! It was beautiful to see my dear teacher so calm and
happy at the thought of going to be with Jesus! Looking at her sweet
face, I seemed to forget about death, and think only of glory to come.
"I felt, as I stood by Miss Lawton's bed, that if I only could be just
like her, I should be willing and glad to change places with her that
minute."
Mrs. Crook was astonished, and well she might be. As she gazed on the
girl's glowing face, and heard her earnest words, she thought it was
very strange for a young thing like her to talk in such a manner about
death—the subject which was above all others hateful to herself. She
was ready to take offence and to chide Fanny for her presumption; but,
on second thoughts, she had not the heart to do it. The girl might be
mistaken, but she was evidently very happy, and for once her mistress
hesitated to meddle with her joy.
Fanny was not one to take liberties, and, as Mrs. Crook asked no
further questions, she went to the kitchen and completed the household
duties she had been permitted to leave undone when she went to see Miss
Lawton. These finished, she tapped lightly at the parlour door, and was
told to come in.
"I only wanted to thank you again for letting me go out, and Miss
Lawton said I was to give her love, and say how much obliged she was to
you, both for sending me and for your kind message, ma'am."
"It was not so kind as hers was to me," replied Mrs. Crook. "I wished
afterwards that I had sent my love. I suppose you did not give it by
mistake?"
No. Fanny had exactly repeated her mistress's words, but, encouraged by
her unusual gentleness of manner, she said—
"Will you go and see Miss Lawton, ma'am? I am sure it would do anybody
good to be with her, even for a little while."
"I should never take such a liberty, Fanny," returned Mrs. Crook, with
a severe look.
"But, ma'am, Miss Lawton said how much she should like to see you
again, only she knew you were not fond of getting out much, so was
afraid to ask you to take the trouble. 'I shall never be able to go to
Mrs. Crook's,' she said, 'but I do not forget how kindly she always
received me, when I came to look after my old scholar.'"
Fanny's eyes were dimmed with tears, and she could not see very
distinctly, but surely Mrs. Crook's were wet also, or why did she wipe
them? And there was a strange trembling of the voice, such as the girl
had never noticed before, as she answered quite softly—
"Miss Lawton is right. I do not care for running from house to house.
But I would go farther to see that dear young lady's face again."
Fanny's duties ended; she went early to bed. Early hours were the rule
at Mrs. Crook's, there being no likelihood of late callers, or of
visitors who would interfere with the order of the little household.
Sleep came to the young servant almost as soon as her head touched the
pillow, but it was longer in visiting her mistress.
Mrs. Crook's mind was full of Miss Lawton. She had never been so near
loving anybody for many a year past, and now this young life, so
precious to many, was drawing to a close. She felt as though she would
like to ask that it might be spared, but she knew not how to frame
such a petition. She certainly said her prayers night and morning, but
they consisted of a few set sentences which she never varied, and "Our
Father" to finish with.
If Mrs. Crook had been questioned as to whether she really thought of
what she said, or wanted what her lips asked for, I am afraid she would
have been obliged to answer "No," for she was a truthful woman, despite
her many other failings.
"If I were to ask, and if other people better able were to pray that
Miss Lawton's life might be spared, from what Fanny says, she might not
be pleased. I cannot understand it. Surely the girl must be mistaken in
thinking that the young lady is willing to die. She has everything to
make her want to live. Such a beautiful home, such kind loving parents,
and, by all accounts, no end of friends that want to keep her. And she
cares for them and her scholars too. I cannot understand it. It is not
natural."
Mrs. Crook was quite right. If it had been natural for the human heart
to be submissive to God's will, surely she, who was so much older
than Miss Lawton, ought to have the feeling in a much greater degree,
especially as she was almost alone in the world, and had no close ties
of kindred or friendship to bind her affections more firmly to earth.
"What is it that makes the difference?" Mrs. Crook kept asking herself;
but no experience enabled her to answer this mental question.
There was another problem presented to her by the conduct of her
little maid, which puzzled Mrs. Crook, and this was the difference
between Fanny and most of her predecessors. She, as mistress, had been
accustomed to scold, and equally, as a matter of course, her servants
had given her cross looks, saucy words, and grudging service. Some
of them had needed constant watching, not only to ensure the proper
performance of their duties, but to keep them from gossiping, and from
bringing in forbidden guests to the kitchen.
It had never struck Mrs. Crook that it was natural for the young to
yearn for companionship, and that to live in such a quiet house, with a
mistress who never dreamed of sympathising with them, either in joy or
sorrow, or troubled herself about their affairs or their friends, must
be rather trying.
It would have been an easy matter for Mrs. Crook to brighten things for
her handmaidens by allowing a little indulgence in the way of visitors;
but such an idea never crossed her mind. Surely what was enough for her
ought to satisfy them! At any rate, if they wanted anything different,
they would not get it under her roof!
There had, however, always been a struggle between mistress and maid
for the little privileges which the younger combatants longed for, and
the elder was resolved not to grant. Then, when both were weary of the
contest, one or the other gave a month's notice, and the interval was
too often spent in mutual aggravation. Fanny had proved herself the
single exception. She was conscientious, honest, truthful, painstaking,
patient, and a daily puzzle to her mistress.
"If she had been like this for a week or two I could have understood
it," thought Mrs. Crook. "One expects good work from a new broom, and I
am used to it. But the longer Fanny stays, the better she works; and if
I go out, I come back to find that she has done almost more and better
whilst I was away than she does when I am looking after her. She falls
into my ways without grumbling, and never contradicts me."
Fanny's good conduct was becoming monotonous, almost aggravating;
for it deprived Mrs. Crook of the only thing she had in the shape of
domestic excitement. It was now depriving her of nightly rest, as
if to compensate for the too great peace of the daylight hours, and
interfering with the clockwork regularity of her habits.
Whatever caused the difference between Fanny and her former servants
Mrs. Crook felt was in some way owing to Miss Lawton, and she
determined to find out the secret if possible.
An almost sleepless night was so unusual with Mrs. Crook, that it
affected her very unpleasantly. Instead of feeling inclined to rise
at her usual hour, her aching head seemed to cling to the pillow. It
needed a great deal of self-communion before she could determine to
have her breakfast brought upstairs, instead of going down to it.
She had not breakfasted in bed for many a year past, indeed she could
hardly remember the last occasion, and she hated to be put out of her
way.
Besides, only sick people ought to be indulged in such a manner, and
she dreaded the very thought of illness. She had often said that half
the people who died were killed by being fussed over and doctored,
and because they gave in for the first little ache that came to them,
instead of facing small ailments, as they would other little troubles.
However, Mrs. Crook remembered that Crook's doctor had once told her
that if people would take care of themselves and nurse up at the
beginning of a cold, it would never get any farther. No doubt her
headache would be cured by a little extra rest, and she would take it.
Fanny came in answer to her summons, and really it might have been a
pleasure to the girl to have something out of the common to do for
her mistress, though it went sadly against the grain as regarded Mrs.
Crook herself. Yet the girl persuaded her to let her sponge her face
and hands and smooth her hair, instead of making the effort to wait on
herself.
These little services were rendered so tenderly and deftly that when
they were completed, the object of them felt much more comfortable and
inclined for the cup of tea and round of toast which followed.
It was a comfort too, that Fanny did not creep about in the stealthy
way that some people consider the proper one in a sick-room, but
moved quickly though quietly. Neither did the girl look doleful. She
was kind and sympathetic, but not at all sad, and discerning a look
of satisfaction on the face of her mistress, she ventured to smile
cheerily back again, and say:
"I am so glad you are not very poorly, ma'am. I believe it is just
the loss of sleep that has made your head ache. I nearly always sleep
well, but if I do lose any rest at night it is sure to give me a bad
headache, and I do not get rid of it till I have made up the loss."
Mrs. Crook was quite glad that Fanny said this. If wakefulness affected
a strong young girl, it was no wonder that it made a little difference
to herself, so she resolved to try and make up for lost time and
restore the balance. She closed her eyes with an unwonted feeling of
thankfulness in her heart, brought there by the thought that with Fanny
in the house she might rest in peace. No need to fear that anything
would go wrong.
With this comforting reflection, Mrs. Crook became unconscious of all
that was around her, and awoke some hours afterwards, refreshed by
sleep, free from pain, and able to dress and go downstairs.
Fanny was delighted to see her mistress apparently well, and Mrs. Crook
found that her confidence had not been misplaced. Her little maid's
daily duty was no eye-service, but done as in God's sight, whether her
earthly employer was present or absent.
[Illustration]
[Illustration]