_House of Commons, Monday, June 27._--Back again to the Coercion Bill.
Report Stage reached, and strong whips out on both sides in anticipation
of Division. Both Front Benches crowded like the rest. GLADSTONE in his
place, as eager to make speech as if it were his first on the subject.
HARTINGTON there too, and CHAMBERLAIN, making, with HENEAGE, a brave
show on end of Front Bench. GLADSTONE spoke early. A full House, but
everyone bored to death. Later, House thinned to degree that invited a
count; but at sound of bell Members held in hand for Division, swooped
down, got themselves counted, saved the sitting, and straightway fled
again.
GEORGE CAMPBELL concerned in interests of Protestant Church. A Papal
Envoy been received by QUEEN to present Jubilee congratulations. Was
that an exceptional privilege for an Ecclesiastic? Would the Brahmin
Head of Benares be allowed to approach HER MAJESTY in similar way? No
answer. Would the Grand Imaum of Mecca?
The Under-Secretary of State shivered in his shoes, but still no
response.
Then Sir GEORGE, uplifting his voice to its most melodious heights,
produced his poser:--"Would the Moderator of the Free Church of Scotland
enjoy such a privilege?"
Old Morality and his colleagues on the Treasury Bench began to grow
uneasy. No saying where CAMPBELL'S list might end. FERGUSSON whispered
to and nudged till, propped on his feet, he feebly urged that Moderator
of Free Church of Scotland does not come under the category of a Foreign
Potentate. A poor quibble this. But CAMPBELL generously disinclined to
push his advantage, and Government escaped immediate defeat.
Growing excitement as Division on JOHN MORLEY'S Amendment restricting
duration of Act to three years approached. RITCHIE has invented new way
of taking Division. Members as anxious to try it as nursery of children
to handle new toy. At first some little difficulty in understanding it.
Members crowded round RITCHIE and asked how it was done.
"Nothing easier or clearer," he said. "There are six doors, which we
will call A, B, C, D, E, and F. As soon as division bell rings, F is
closed. B is left half open. Members voting 'Aye' pass through the A
door and meet the 'Noes' coming through D. A and C are then
simultaneously shut. If B is open, the 'Ayes' and the 'Noes,' having
seen E closed, form in one stream, pass through, and there you are.
Don't you see?"
[Illustration: Young 'Olden.]
Everybody saw quite clearly. Quite a pleasure to see ISAAC HOLDEN
(_etat._ eighty, but full of youthful vigour) starting off to try the
new experiment. Got through all right. But, half an hour later, GILBERT
GREENALL found in recesses of ventilating cellars, where, he said, he
was "looking for door E."
_Business done._--Report on Coercion Bill.
_Tuesday._--WILFRID LAWSON made admirable suggestion to-night. Proposes
that, when titles or honours are conferred upon anyone, a statement
should accompany announcement, setting forth the public services on
account of which the honour has been conferred. It is so done in respect
of Victoria Cross. List of Honours conferred in connection with Jubilee
show the necessity of extending custom.
"Who's he?" said Sir BORTHWICK, Bart., looking down the _Gazette_ when
it came out. "Never heard of him, nor him either. I seem to be really
the only distinguished person in the lot."
List notable not only for what it includes but for what it omits. House
of Commons united in expectation of one recognition, looked for in vain.
If "Barnets" were to be made in Jubilee time, why was JOSEPH GILLIS
overlooked? This thought in everyone's mind, as JOEY B. turned up
to-night telling in a division against the Government. His public
appearance now so rare that its recurrence was an event. Since he came
into possession of Castle Butlerstown the alteration, long-working, made
sudden and complete advance. His moustache, now past the indefinite
stage, is an unquestionable reality, and to see JOEY B. twirling it _a
la_ RANDOLPH, is a delight to the quiet mind. JOSEPH feels his new
responsibilities. When reproached by TIM HEALY with his excessive
respectability he is not moved.
[Illustration: "Who's he?"]
"It's all very well for you, TIM, to be brow-beating the SPEAKER,
interrupting Hon. Members opposite, moving the adjournment and the like.
But it's different for a man who has a Castle, a drawbridge, a moat, and
a moustache."
Characteristic infelicity on the part of the Government to have
neglected this opportunity of recognising a reformed character. JOEY B.
is now a credit to the House. It would have been to the credit of the
Government had his friends been able to hail him as Sir JOSEPH GILLIS
BIGGAR, Bart., of Butlerstown Castle.
_Business done._--Coercion Bill again.
_Thursday._--"He! he!" said Old Morality, his white teeth shedding pale
light over Treasury Bench. "Capital joke! Hope they'll often repeat it."
Capital it was, and so unexpected, too. Secret admirably kept, and
sprung upon amazed House with marvellous effect. After questions, O. M.
moved Resolutions providing for discussion on Report Stage of Coercion
Bill being peremptorily closed at Seven o'Clock on Monday night.
"The Early Closing Association," said Sir WILFRID LAWSON, looking across
at Noble Lords and Right Hon. Gentlemen arrayed on Treasury Bench in
support of this Motion.
Parnellites of course hostile to Motion. But more particularly enraged
because O. M. in moving it had not spoken single sentence.
"Come, come," said JOHN DILLON, "this is too bad. If we are to lose our
liberties, let us, at least, have a speech in support of the
proposition."
But O. M. obdurately silent, and debate kept up for three hours from
Opposition side. Then Division taken, and Motion carried by majority of
a round hundred. After this, Ministers looked forward to another
wearisome evening, with Friday to follow, and more talk through Monday
up to fatal Seven o'Clock. Here's where the joke came in. The
Opposition, returning from Division Lobby after voting on Closure
Proposition, continued their march through the House and cleared out by
the door. Ministers watched process with amazement, growing into
apprehension, and finally broadening into a grin of delight as the joke
flashed upon them. Having given Government the trouble of preparing,
moving and carrying Resolution, fixing closure of debate on Monday
evening, Irish Members not going to debate at all! The Government might
take their Report Stage; which they did, and before you could say "W. H.
SMITH," the Report Stage of the Coercion Bill was agreed to, and House,
scarcely recovered from surprise, was engaged upon miscellaneous
business of the Orders of the day.
_Friday, Midnight._--Since dinner-time there has been exhilarating scene
in Palace Yard. Nearly every 'bus that has passed has dropped a Duchess
at the gate. Four-wheelers, conveying Countesses, have regularly filed
in; whilst, what Sir ROBERT PEEL would call "Noble Baronesses," have
arrived on foot. As distinguished Novelist somewhere writes, "Lo! a
strange thing has happened." On ordinary days House of Lords, which
commences public business at 5.30, adjourns about 5.37. At this hour of
midnight House still sitting, and no sign of Adjournment. Irish Land
Bill under debate. Subject irresistible to Noble Lords. Have foregone
their late afternoon drive in the Park. More than one has patriotically
dined on a chop.
A flush of honest pride mantles many a noble countenance. All very well
for the Commons to boast of their long sittings; but see what the Peers
can do when duty calls! At first a little consternation at the arrivals
from without. But even that turns out well. There were stories of
anxious wives communicating with House of Commons during All-night
Sittings, and finding errant husbands not there. But here are Noble
Lords unflinchingly serving their country, remaining at their post,
whate'er betide.
A beautiful and a soothing sight, which affects to tears some of the
Commons, who sit in the Gallery, and look down upon it.
_Business done._--Lords pass Report Stage of Irish Land Bill.
* * * * *
"HOME, SWEET HOME!"
(_New Version, by a Much-Worn-out M.P._)
"The welcome cry, 'Who goes home' sounds like a melancholy dirge
through the rapidly-emptying lobbies."--Mr. OSBORNE MORGAN, M.P.,
_in the_ "_Nineteenth Century_."
MIDST clauses and paragraphs though we may roam.
Be it ever so dirge-like, there's no cry like "Home!"
A charm undefined seems to hallow it there,
After TANNER'S loud shindy and CONYBEARE'S blare.
Home! Home! Sweet, sweet "Home!"
Be it ever so dirge-like, there's no cry like "Home!"
An exile from office, I will not complain,
Give me only my calm "beauty sleep" once again;
The birds singing sweetly at dawn be my lot
To hear, not loud torrents of partisan rot.
Home! Home! Sweet, sweet "Home!"
Be it ever so dirge-like, there's no cry like "Home!"
* * * * *