Two Boys sallied forth from a straggling Village in search of an
irrational Female known as Dame Fortune.
It was a sad Jolt to the Walking Vegetables back in the Stockade when
they heard, on Good Authority, that Ezra and Bill were slamming it over
the Plate and batting above .400.
They simply wagged the ossified Domes and hoped the Boys were getting
it Honestly.
Ezra and Bill, up among the inflammatory Posters and the nervous
Electric Signs, kept on playing Tag with the Sherman Act until they had
it in Oodles and Bundles and Bales and Stacks.
Finally when they became so prosperous that they had to wear Shoes
specially made, with Holes in the top, they began to be troubled with
Tender Recollections of Humble Birthplace.
Through the Haze of Intervening Years they saw the Game of Two-Old-Cat
in the Vacant Lot back of the M. E. Church and forgot all about
sleeping in the refrigerated Attic and going down in the morning to
thaw out the Wooden Pump.
They yearned to elbow out from the Congested Traffic of the cold and
heartless City and renew Sweet Associations.
They wanted to wander once more down the Avenues of Rhubarb and clasp
hands with Old Friends whose simple Hearts averaged about 14 Throbs to
the Minute.
It is the regulation Dream of every Financial Yeggman to go back to his
Old Town wearing a Laurel Wreath and have the School Children throw
Moss Roses in his Pathway.
So Ezra sent on a Proposition.
He wanted to build a Library at the corner of Fifth and Main, thereby
making it easy for his old Neighbors to read the Six Best Sellers
without plugging the Author's Game.
He offered to give 20,000 Bucks if the Citizens would raise 5,000 more
and maintain the Thing.
Ezra had not been in the Habit of reading anything except the Tape and
he cared about as much for George Bernard Shaw as George Bernard Shaw
cared for him.
Nevertheless, he wanted to be remembered, 50 Years hence, as the Man
who built the Library and not as the guy who dealt from the Bottom of
the Deck, utilizing the Sleeve Device and the Bosom Hold-Out.
By the use of Anaesthetics and Forceps the 5,000 was secured.
Then the Building was erected and the only Criticism made was that the
Location was poor and the dod-blasted Concern looked like a Barn and
it was arranged wrong inside and nobody didn't want no Library nohow.
When Ezra came down to the Dedication to face an outraged and tax-
burdened People, he was just as popular as Tonsilitis or Sciatica
ever dared to be.
Bill came back also.
He floated into Town one day and appeared in Jimison's General Store
and called for a Good Cigar.
He told Mr. Jimison to take one and called up the Boys around the Stove.
When the Word got out that Bill was Buying over at the Bee Hive,
representative Citizens came on the Jump from the Harness Shop and
the Undertaking Parlor and the Elite Bowling Alley.
Every Man that showed up got a Lottie Lee with a Band around it, and
when Bill left on the 3:40 a Mob followed him to the Train.
Ever after that the Word was freely passed around that Bill was a Prince.
MORAL: In scattering Seeds of Kindness, do it by Hand and not by
Machinery.