town served to increase his melancholy, which threatened to merge into
consumption, he, by the advice of his physician--that change of scene,
and a warm climate, might remove all the bad symptoms he
exhibited--exchanged into a regiment stationed in the Island of Ceylon,
into which I also enlisted, that I might accompany him. There was,
alas! no other individual on earth for whom I cared. Far from recovering
on the voyage, its tedious dulness sunk him more and more into his
habitual lowness of spirits; and, on our arrival on the island, he grew
worse, and did not survive many months. I buried him at Trincomalee.
Alas! how true is the saying, that 'all men know where they were born,
but none where they shall lay their bones.'"
So intense had been the interest I felt in his narrative, that I
scarcely moved, lest I should lose a word, or interrupt him. He paused
at this event, and wiped a tear from his eyes. William and Mary I had
until this hour looked upon as my real parents. For those I now heard
of, I had new feelings to acquire. I noticed that he did not tell me the
surname of my parents, and I pressed not the question. All that I asked
of him was to continue his history, and inform me what had induced him
once more to return to Scotland.
"Can a Scotsman ask that question of a Scotsman?" said he. "In whatever
part of the globe he may be, the hope to lay his bones with his fathers
is the Polar Star that cheers his wanderings, be they prosperous or
adverse. Remove this hope, and his energies from that moment sink, for
he has lost all of life worth caring for. I have both known and felt it.
But to proceed:--
"After your father's death, I felt the most solitary of men for many
months. Still I continued to do my duty as a private soldier, without
taking any interest in surrounding events. About two years after my
arrival, a revolt broke out in the colony: the Singaleese were aided by
the Candians from the mountains; and the handful of Europeans could
scarce make head against the multitudes of the natives, who had courage
and ferocity more than sufficient to have exterminated us every man;
but, fortunately for us, they had no discipline or other mode of
warfare, but to rush on their enemy and overpower them. This they found
to be a vain attempt; yet they never changed their mode until compelled
to sue for peace, by the immense slaughter made of them in this war of
carnage and massacre. I had been several times the decided cause of
victory to the Dutch, in preventing small detachments from being cut
off, and directing the movements of the main body; for which services I
was promoted to a lieutenantcy. I never rose higher, nor do I believe I
would have attained this rank, had it not been to enable me to take
command of small parties, for which I was qualified from my being ever
on the outskirts of the army, or in the borders of the jungle. Great
numbers of my men died through fatigue and fever. I, myself for several
years, remained robust; but my turn came at length. I fevered and
relapsed; several times my life was despaired of for whole weeks; and
many wounds I had received from the Candian spears and arrows broke out
afresh, and baffled the power of medicine. My constitution triumphed
over my malady; but I was unfit for service. I have one wound here on my
side that is hurrying me to my grave; which, I hope, will be in
Pennycuick churchyard. But, now that I have the happiness to find my
long-lost charge, there is one more duty for me to perform when we reach
Edinburgh, whither you must return with me, to consign me to the dust.
That duty I never did expect to be called to perform--it is to
re-possess myself of the certificates of your father's marriage and your
baptism, which are, as I told you, concealed behind the wainscot in the
house in Mary King's Close. I trust, for your sake, they are still safe,
and may be the means of placing you in your proper rank in society."
"Dear father," I replied--"for I must still call you so--if it is to be
of any service to me alone, it is of no avail to proceed further on that
errand, for fortune baffles all my undertakings, and I tell you you will
not succeed; still I have no objection to return with you to Scotland,
although my present object in London was to go to sea in a vessel bound
for the Indian seas--the only place of all I ever visited where fortune
smiled upon me, and I scorned her favours."
After dinner I gave the lieutenant an outline of my adventures since he
had left Edinburgh, at which he was much moved. When I told him of the
obligation I lay under to the worthy lawyer--
"Ah, Johnnie!" said he, "we have already half-gained the victory. Mr
Davidson was at college and intimate with your father, and ho knows me
well as your father's servant. Scotland does not contain a better man
for our purpose. I shall fee him liberally, and fortune may yet smile
upon us." It was now late in the evening, and the lieutenant left me for
the night.
Scarce was he gone, when a new passion took entire possession of
me--that of pride and ambition. I felt myself quite changed, and strange
visions of imaginary importance floated before me. My present finances
were now deemed low enough--eleven guineas--which at one period I would
have considered an immense sum. So sanguine had a few hours made me,
that I looked upon it only as so many pence. From this period I date a
complete revolution in my train of thoughts. Formerly I had cared but
for the passing hour, nor heeded for to-morrow. My early education had,
until now, clung to me in all my vicissitudes, being ever the outcast
orphan boy, who, his belly full, his back warm, had nothing further to
obtain. My contentment was now gone. But to proceed:--
For a few days I was forced to keep at home, until the marks of my Tower
Hill affray had disappeared; during which, urged by my new passion
(pride), I got myself equipped in the extreme of fashion. I now smile at
my folly, when I look back to these few weeks in which I was swayed by
it. But no young lady, getting her first ball-dress, was ever more
fidgety or hard to please than John Square. The lieutenant was pleased
to see me ape the gentleman; for he really looked upon me as such, and
paid me every deference, as the son of his master. The money he had
saved while in Ceylon he counted as mutual; nor would he allow me to
expend one farthing of my own. We both were now anxious to proceed to
Edinburgh, and embarked in the first trader bound for Leith. This voyage
was the most pleasant I had ever made; I was in fairyland, and the
lieutenant not far behind me.
When we were landed, with the earliest convenience we proceeded to
Edinburgh, with far different feelings from any I had before
experienced. Having arrived in the evening, it was next morning, after
an early breakfast, that we proceeded from our inn in the Canongate
towards the Cross, to reconnoitre the old domicile of William Square,
the house in which I had first drawn breath. You may judge our horror,
surprise, and grief--I cannot describe it--that loved edifice had
disappeared from the earth; it no longer existed. Where it had once
stood, new walls were shooting up towards the firmament. It and many
others had been swept away, to make room for the site of the present
Royal Exchange. A feeling of desolation, bordering on despair, took
possession of my heart. The lieutenant, uttering a groan, wrung his
hands, and looked upon me with a gaze that pierced me to the soul. I
felt his frame leaning upon me with the weight of death. He would have
sunk to the ground, had I not supported him. With, difficulty I conveyed
him into Corbet's tavern, under the Piazzas, where, after a time, he
recovered, only to give vent to a burst of anguish.
"Ill-fated parent and ill-fated child!" he cried, "it was not that my
heart yearned not to tell you the family from whence you sprang, but
a presentiment hung heavy upon my mind that there was evil still
in store for you. Alas, my poor John! are you really doomed to dree
the weird assigned your forebears. Your father's father was Mr
William ---- of ----. Can it be possible that these canting Whigamores
have the spirit of prophecy? This almost forces me to think they had--
'For saints' blood and saints harried,
The third generation will ne'er inherit.'
"It is too true, too true!"
These last sentences he repeated to himself several times as if
unconsciously, and again sunk back upon his chair in a state of stupor;
nor could I rouse him by all the gentle methods I could use. At length I
called a sedan-chair, and had him conveyed to the inn, and put to bed.
He seemed quite unconscious and passive, until, disturbed by our moving
him into bed, when, as if mechanically, he again said--
"'For saints' blood and saints harried,
The third generation will ne'er inherit.'
My poor boy! my poor boy!"
At this time a physician arrived, and, having administered the remedies
he thought most efficacious in my foster-parent's case, was about to
retire, when I inquired if he thought there was any immediate danger. He
candidly said he thought there was; for the patient's constitution was
much reduced, and he had received some violent shock, which might dash
out the remaining drops from the nearly exhausted glass. He advised that
he should not be left alone for any time; and, above all, that he must
be kept quiet, until he called again in the afternoon.
As soon as I had recovered myself a little from the agitation this
untoward event had produced, I wrote a note to Mr Davidson, requesting
he would be so kind as call upon me as soon as convenient, stating that
I had urgent business to consult him upon, and pleading, as my excuse
for putting him to the trouble, the sudden illness of a friend. When the
cadie was sent off with my card, I began to ruminate upon my prospects,
which again had been so suddenly overcast. He on whom my sole dependence
was placed lay in the room where I sat, in a state of prostration
bordering almost upon unconsciousness. The visions of pride and
consequence in which I had indulged, from the time I first heard of my
gentle forefathers, began to fade from before me; a short time of sad
and melancholy reasoning on probabilities had swept them away as
completely as the innovating hands of the good citizens had removed the
old tenement in which the testimonials of their reality had been
concealed. In the midst of these reflections, the lawyer arrived. His
astonishment at seeing me was equalled by my joy at meeting with one in
whose judgment and shrewdness I had the utmost confidence. The sight of
him renewed my hopes; and the fond clinging to self-importance, so
natural, yet so foolish, when it is derived from no merit or endeavour
of the individual, again returned upon me.
After mutual congratulations, we at once proceeded to business. After
stating my arrival in London, and strange meeting with the lieutenant, I
narrated the melancholy fate of my parents. He heard me to the end with
all the imperturbability of a man of business; yet his countenance
betrayed the interest he took in my recital. When I concluded, he rose
to his feet; and, placing his hands behind his back, moved quickly two
or three times across the room, then stopped at the side of the bed
where the lieutenant lay; and, after gazing for a short time upon his
altered countenance, turned to me, and gave his head an ominous shake.
"Mr Square," said he, "this is a strange business. I myself have not a
doubt of the truth of all the circumstances, some of which I have a
distinct recollection of--more especially the quarrel and duel; but how
to obtain the necessary evidence I at present cannot divine. The loss of
the papers is a very material point; and the sudden illness of your
foster-parent is very unfortunate. But there is also another difficulty,
even were we so fortunate, as I hope we will be, as to restore him to
health and consciousness: his testimony could not be taken in any court
of justice; he is an outlaw, tainted by actual rebellion, and liable to
be apprehended and executed as a traitor. His mildest punishment, if not
pardoned after sentence, would be banishment; and, what is not the least
worthy of serious consideration, the object to be attained, unless your
friend is very rich, may not be worth the expense and trouble. That
foolish rhyme has been fulfilled, in the meantime, so far. Your
great-grandfather was a zealous partisan of the Lauderdale
administration in Scotland; and, I believe, rather rigorous with the
adherents of the Covenant. At the Revolution, he fell into disgrace with
the powers that assumed the reins of government, and so turned his hopes
upon the restoration of the exiled family, and impoverished himself in
aiding the intrigues to restore them. Your grandfather had been bred in,
and adhered to, the same politics, now a losing game. He still farther
reduced the rent-roll by sales and bonds; and, at his death, your two
uncles, who remained at home, changed their party. The older died young,
without having married; and the younger succeeded to what remained of
the estate of his ancestors--a mere wreck, soon spent in dissipation.
Not one furr of land that once owned your ancestors as lord now owns
their sway. With the sum produced by the last sale, your uncle bade
adieu to Scotland; and you are the last of the race. I would advise no
farther proceedings than to endeavour, if possible, to recover the
documents relating to your birth and legitimacy, if they have not been
destroyed in pulling down the old walls."
Why should I dwell on my disappointment. Mr Davidson used every effort,
by inquiries and offers of reward; but the papers never were recovered,
although we got from one of the workmen the brass Dutch box in which
they had been placed. He had purchased it from one of the labourers who
picked it up in the ruins, and had destroyed the papers as of no
importance. I had now the knowledge of the family from whom I was
descended, but no proof to establish my claim, even though my right to
property to any amount would have been the consequence.
As for my foster-parent, he gradually recovered from the stupor that had
overwhelmed him, but never regained his wonted energies. He was
possessed of a few hundred pounds, besides his half-pay from the Dutch
Government, which was regularly paid. He never could endure me for any
length of time out of his sight; and I remained with him until his
death, a few years afterwards. I know that I was wasting my time; yet I
could not desert the old man, whose whole happiness was concentrated in
me; and, shall I confess, I felt a strange happiness in his society--for
he alone of all mankind treated the beggar-boy of former years as an
individual of rank; and our conversation was generally about the
traditions of my ancestors. When the weather would permit, it was our
wont to leave our house at Clock Mill, to wander over the scenes he
loved--the spots in and around the bosom of Arthur Seat, where he had
first won the affections of his departed Mary--and point out the
favourite haunts which my father and mother used to sit in or walk. On
these we would gaze, until our imagination seemed vested with the power
of calling the personages before us. Thus passed on the time until the
lieutenant's death, which happened suddenly.
I was thus once more alone in the world, without a tie to bind me to it,
save the natural love of life inherent in man.
In Edinburgh I had formed no acquaintance; a continual soreness haunted
me as to the dignity of birth, yet I never assumed even the name of my
parent. I only heard it pronounced by my foster-father, who urged me to
adopt my family honours. The conversation of the lieutenant had given my
mind a military bias. I was weary of Edinburgh, which recalled to my
mind too many sad reflections; and I mentioned to Mr Davidson the
resolution I had formed. After winding up the affairs of the lieutenant,
I found that I was possessed of one hundred and seventy pounds. Mr
Davidson, who still insisted that the money I had left as a gift in his
hands was at my disposal, generously offered to advance the amount
required to purchase me an ensigncy; but this I would on no account
allow. My pride revolted at a pecuniary obligation, as a derogation from
my family dignity, which still hung heavy upon me. By his advice, and
through his assistance, I sunk in the hands of the magistrates one
hundred and fifty pounds, as the most profitable way I could invest
it--the interest to accumulate until my return in person to claim it. It
was about the year 1775, when the troubles in America had commenced.
Accounts had just arrived that blood had been shed at Lexington and
Concord; and the bootless victory at Boston was announced, but not
confirmed. It was the month of August, and the utmost excitement reigned
among the people in the city: every means, both legal and scarcely
legal, being employed to raise troops. The comprehending act was passed,
by which the justices of the peace were empowered to impress and send to
the army all idle or immoral characters: an engine of great tyranny and
oppression in their hands; for every person who was in the least
obnoxious to them was hurried to the army, whatever his character might
be. Without informing my friend Mr Davidson, I bade him farewell, and
proceeded to Glasgow, where I entered as a private into the Fraser
Highlanders, resolved to carve out my own fortune with my sword. This I
did through my foolish pride, so little had I learned by my former
experience. During my short stay with the party, before I joined the
regiment, my mind became disgusted by the modes I saw practised to
augment the army, by trepanning and actual violence. The landed
gentlemen and magistrates appeared to have lost, in their zeal, every
sense of justice. The most disgusting modes were resorted to: such as
putting a shilling into a drinking jug, and causing the king's health to
be pledged; while the soldier, in plain clothes, sitting in company as a
tradesman, or a person from the country, was ready to seize the person
whom he had pitched upon, the moment he drank the royal toast. If he
resisted, nothing could save him from prison; enlist, and attest he
must. So prevalent, indeed, was this mode, that the publicans were under
the necessity of getting pewter jugs with glass bottoms to drink from,
or their houses would have been deserted. This gave security to the
customer that there was not a shilling in the bottom; and allowed him to
watch through the glass the motions of the persons with whom he drank.
The only redress the kidnapped individual got was, that he might choose
the regiment he would join; and he in general fixed upon some other one
than the one to which his betrayer belonged. One instance disgusted me
beyond endurance. It happened to a good-looking young lad, belonging to
Hamilton. An intimate acquaintance of his had been enlisted, whether
voluntarily or not I do not recollect, but he was still without any
marks of his new profession. Several of the old soldiers were also with
him, prowling about for recruits, when he recognised his former friend
in the Briggate, accompanied by his intended bride and their mothers,
who had come to Glasgow with the young people to purchase their
plenishing. Rejoiced to meet an old acquaintance in the city, the party,
being fatigued with their walk and the heat of the weather, retired to a
neighbouring public-house to rest and refresh themselves. The companions
of the betrayer, to avoid suspicion, had passed on, as if they were not
of his party, but entered the house a short time after. As those from
the country had business to transact, they refused to tarry, and the
new-made soldier insisted to pay for the entertainment, which, after a
good-natured dispute, he was allowed to do. By design, or otherwise, he
sat at the far end of the table, and when the landlady was called, he
said, handing forward a shilling--
"Here, George, is a shilling; be so good as hand it to the landlady."
"The reckoning is one and sixpence," said she.
"Oh, I have plenty of the king's coin. Here is another for you, George."
To the alarm and grief of the bridal party, when they were at the door
to proceed on the business they had come to town upon, the soldiers in
waiting seized the young man, and declared him one of the king's men.
The betrayer shrunk back, not yet hardened to the trade; but his
associates compelled the victim to go with them to the jail. Fortunately
for them and the young man, they had respectable friends in the city,
who waited upon some of the magistrates. An investigation took place.
The soldiers scrupled not to maintain that he was enlisted, and were
willing to swear that he had taken the second shilling in the king's
name--the usual words of voluntary enlistment. They even produced the
landlady, who, either leaning towards the soldiers (her good customers),
or not paying much attention at the time, declared that she heard, when
the second shilling was given, distinctly the words "king and coin." So
powerful was the feeling at this time, that he was declared duly
enlisted, and only escaped by paying to the party a round sum of
smart-money.
After passing the winter at drill, I was embarked with a numerous body,
to reinforce the army besieged in Quebec, where we arrived in the month
of May. I was now on the field where I was to reap the fruits of my
ambition; but I found it unpromising, and strewed with thorns. Still I
had an object to attain, however distant it might be, and my oppression
left me. I was most assiduous in my duties, and was soon made a
corporal. My heart leaped for joy. This was the first step to my
ambition; my hopes began to brighten, and I submitted to our privations
without a murmur. At the storming of St John's, I was made a serjeant;
and here I stuck. In vain was all my daring and good conduct. At the
descent upon Long Island, I was as conspicuous as I dared to be by the
rules of strict discipline, and, in consequence, often had the charge of
small picquets upon dangerous service, and was twice slightly wounded.
Once I led the company, and took several prisoners, after both the
captain and ensign were carried to the rear dangerously wounded. The
ensign died in a few days of his wound; and it was generally believed by
the men of the regiment that I would have been promoted to his rank. At
length, in the month of August, 1781, I was made paymaster-serjeant;
which rank I did not long retain; for the army was not long after
completely surrounded by the Americans, besieged in Yorktown and at
Gloucester, and, after suffering the extreme of hardships for twelve
days, from sickness, famine, and the fire of the enemy, Lord Cornwallis,
hopeless of being relieved, surrendered himself and army prisoners of
war. This put an extinguisher upon all my hopes. I was now a prisoner,
sick, and looked upon for death, and must have perished, had it not been
for one of the captains of the American army, to whom the sick prisoners
were delivered over. He proved to have been one of the palantines--an
Aberdeen lad--who had been my companion in early misfortune, now an
extensive proprietor in New England. To him I was indebted for much
kindness during my imprisonment until the peace. When I returned to
Britain, I was discharged with a pension of one shilling per day, being
what is called the king's letter, which, with the accumulation of my
annuity, enables me to finish my chequered career in competence, and
wander as I list amidst these scenes of wo and pleasure, lovely by
nature, and endeared by former recollections.
THE BEWILDERED STUDENT.[14]
[Footnote 14: The author of this tale, John Bethune, was one of the two
brothers, self-educated labourers, referred to in the Editor's note
appended to "The Young Laird."--ED.]