THE LITTLE PANJANDRUM AT LAST.
"The Little Panjandrum!" exclaimed Marjorie, "I _shall_ be glad to see
him at last. What is he like?"
"Oh! don't bother me about him," cried the Dodo, impatiently; "he's all
right as Panjandrums go, I suppose, but I don't want to get into his
clutches again, I can tell you."
"Don't you, indeed?" remarked a voice, sarcastically. "Well, His
Importance is particularly anxious to see _you_ again, anyhow."
The Dodo gasped, and the children turning around beheld the Little
Panjandrum's Ambassador.
"Hullo! you here, too?" he continued, when he recognized them. "Well, I
must say, you have been long enough bringing this wretched bird along."
"I think you ought to be very grateful to us for having done so at all,"
said Dick, boldly. "What are you going to do with him now you have got
him?"
"H'm! that remains to be seen," said the Ambassador, pursing his lips up
tightly, and staring at the Dodo severely.
[Illustration: "'Come along,' said the Ambassador."]
"Come along," he continued, catching hold of what would have been the
Dodo's ear if he had had one, but which was in reality a sort of woolly
fluff growing all over his head.
"Come along, and see your friend the Little Panjandrum."
"Leave go!" screamed the Dodo, "you hurt."
"Rubbish!" exclaimed the Ambassador, dragging him along, "it doesn't
hurt _me_!"
"Oh! oh! I've dropped one of my gloves," cried the Dodo, pathetically.
"If you take my advice, you'll throw the other one away, too," said the
Ambassador; "it will only make the Little Panjandrum more angry than
ever to see them."
"They make me look so respectable," whispered the Dodo.
"Respectable!" said the Ambassador, contemptuously; "nothing would make
_you_ respectable--you ridiculous object, you."
"I think you are most un--un--ki--ki--kind," sobbed the Dodo, "you are
always pi--pi--pi--pitching into m--me, and ca--ca--calling me
n--n--nasty names. It--it--it's too bad."
"Oh, stop that noise," said the Ambassador, giving the Dodo's wool a
twist; "I'm ashamed of you. Ah, here comes His Importance," he
continued, as the sound of a drum was heard in the distance.
The children all eagerness to see the Little Panjandrum, stood in a
line by the side of the pathway, while the Ambassador, keeping a firm
hold on the Dodo, remained by their side.
The sound of the drum drew nearer, and the children could distinguish
another sound mingling with it.
The Ambassador smiled blandly, while he kept time with his foot.
Presently the children caught sight of a curious procession approaching.
The Little Panjandrum, a little fat man in Oriental costume, was
preceded by two attendants--one playing a kind of drum, and the other a
jew's harp, while a third attendant held an enormous umbrella over His
Importance's head. On the top of the umbrella were a number of curious
signs, of which the children could not possibly imagine the meaning.
"Obbly--bobblee--wallee--bobbel--ob," said the Ambassador, bowing three
times, and dragging the Dodo's head down with him each time.
"Flop!" replied the Little Panjandrum, and the two musicians fell on
their faces.
"Um--sopelee--gumbos--galapaloo--glab," remarked the Ambassador.
"Ploff!" said the Little Panjandrum, and the black slave at the back
jigged the State Umbrella up and down several times very violently.
[Illustration: The Panjandrum and suite passed along.]
"What a funny language," whispered Marjorie. "I wonder what they are
talking about?"
"Semlifee--dobbel--bingle--bingle--boff," cried the Ambassador, lifting
up one leg, while the Dodo painfully followed his example.
The Little Panjandrum gravely kicked the two musicians, who were still
prostrate on the ground before him, and they immediately arose and stood
on one leg each, like the Ambassador. Then His Importance himself
balanced himself in the same way. The black slave at the back, whose
legs were attached to those of the Little Panjandrum, imitated him.
The children were highly interested in this proceeding, when the
Ambassador, without speaking, motioned them to stand on one leg each,
too.
"Come on, let's do it," said Dick, "and see what they are going to do."
So the three children solemnly hopped upon one foot, too.
For a moment or two no one spoke. And at last the Dodo, gasping out,
"Oh! I can't keep it up any longer," fell to the ground, and everybody
else put their leg down again.
"Ough!" said the Ambassador, in a disgusted voice. "Of course, _you_
must needs spoil it all. Most disrespectful behavior to the Little
Panjandrum, I call it."
"I couldn't help it," gasped the Dodo, apologetically.
"Oh, of course not," said the Ambassador. "A bad excuse is better than
none."
"Well, _I_ couldn't have kept it up much longer," declared Marjorie;
"could you, Dick?"
"No," said Dick; "I can't think what we are doing it at all for."
"Court etiquette demands it," said the Ambassador, importantly. "Hush!
His Importance is about to speak."
"Gobloblee! grabluff!" said the Little Panjandrum.
"Go on, Dodo," said the Ambassador. "_Gobloblee, grabluff_, at once when
His Importance tells you."
The Dodo gave a sigh, and went up to the Little Panjandrum's Umbrella
and gave it a twirl. When it stopped, a little finger at the top pointed
to the word "Guilty," which was painted in large letters in one section
of the Umbrella.
"Again," said the Ambassador.
The Dodo, looking very dejected, gave the Umbrella another twirl. This
time it stopped at the words "Hard labor."
The Dodo groaned.
"Once more!" shouted the Ambassador.
For the third time the unlucky bird spun the Umbrella round, and this
time it stopped at "Fine."
"How much, your Importance?" asked the Ambassador of the Little
Panjandrum.
"_Cablofechee!_" was the reply.
"Your gloves are forfeited," declared the Ambassador.
The Dodo gave a despairing glance at the children, and began to remove
his one glove.
"What's he being tried for?" asked Dick, in a whisper.
"Contempt of Panjandrumosity," said the Ambassador. "It's a dreadful
offence. All trials are conducted by means of the State Umbrella; it
saves all the bother of judges and juries, you know. But, look out! the
Little Panjandrum is off again."
"Dumflopety--golopegee--gal--popo--sum--delopotomex," remarked the
Little Panjandrum, as he walked away, escorted by his retinue.
"He says that your 'hard labor' sentence is, to carry the State Umbrella
in future, and that you are to commence your duties in one hour from
now; in the meantime you may consider yourself at liberty till then."
The Ambassador followed after the Little Panjandrum, and the children
gathered around the poor Dodo, full of sympathy for his misfortunes.
[Illustration: "'Go it, Dodo!' cried the Palaeotherium."]
"Have they gone?" whispered the Prehistoric Doctor, coming forward from
behind a bush, behind which he had been hiding.
"Yes," said Marjorie. "Isn't it a shame the poor Dodo should always be
getting into hot water?"
"Never mind," said the Doctor; "I've found something that will make him
happy. Look here!"
The Dodo raised himself up from the ground, and gave an inquiring glance
at the Doctor who held out a pair of boxing-gloves.
"Oh! what beauties!" said the Dodo. "How fat they are! Are they for me?"
"Yes, if you would like them," said the Doctor. "I have a pair, too.
Let's try a round together--shall we?"
"All right!" shouted the Dodo, getting up excitedly, and hastily
fastening on the gloves. "Now then--guard!" And he went for the Doctor
furiously. The Doctor squared up, and was soon boxing as skilfully as
the Dodo.
The Palaeotherium and the Eteraedarium, hearing the noise, came forward
and joined the crowd of creatures, which by this time had collected in a
ring. And amid shouts of "Go it, Dodo!" "Three cheers for the Dodo!"
the first round concluded, the ungainly bird winning a decided victory.
They were just about to begin again, when they heard a succession of
piercing screams from the direction in which the lake was situated.