At the end of the week, Zebby came home, according to appointment; and
having paid her respects to her excellent lady, she ran up stairs, and
entered the apartment where the two young ladies were getting the tasks
assigned them by Mrs. Harewood. When Matilda first beheld her she had a
great inclination to embrace her, for her heart bounded towards the only
creature she had been acquainted with from her cradle; but she suddenly
checked herself, and pretended to continue her reading; but Ellen spoke to
her kindly, though she told her that she was so situated, as not to be able
to chat at present.
Zebby comprehended this, and would have withdrawn; but not to have a single
word from her, whom in her heart, she still considered as her young
mistress, the faithful creature could not endure; after waiting some
minutes in vain, she dropped a second humble courtesy, and said--"How you
do, Missy? me very glad see you larn booky, but me hopes you spare one
look, one wordy, for poor Zebby; me go away one long weeky, to nurse white
man baby, pretty as you, Missy."
"Yes," said Matilda, reproachingly, "you went away and left me very
willingly, though it was to wait on a person you never saw before."
"Ah, Missy! you no lovee me, and poor white woman lovee me much. You makee
beer spit in my face--she givee me tea-gruel out of her own cup. You callee
me black beetle--she callee me good girly, good nursy, good every ting."
Matilda gave a deep sigh; she well remembered that it was on the very day
of her outrage that Zebby had quitted her, and in her altered sense of
justice, she could not help seeing the truth of the poor negro's statement;
she looked up, with an ingenuous sense of error depicted on her
countenance, and said--"I am sorry, Zebby, that I used you so ill, but I
will never do it again."
The poor African was absolutely astonished, for never had the voice of
concession been heard from the lips of Matilda before, even to her own
parents; and the idea of her humility and kindness in this acknowledgment
so deeply affected the faithful creature, that, after gazing at her in
admiration for a moment, she burst into tears, and then clasping her hands,
she exclaimed, in a broken manner--"Oh, tankee God! tankee God! pretty
Missy be good girly at last! her lovee her good mamma--her pity poor
negro--her go up stair when her die. Oh, me be so glad! great God lovee my
dear Missy now!"
Matilda felt the tears suffuse her own eyes, as the kind heart of her late
faithful slave thus gave vent to its natural and devout emotions; and she
gave her hand to Zebby, who kissed it twenty times. Ellen was so delighted
with this proof of good disposition in Matilda, and with the honest
effusions of the poor negro, that she could not forbear gratifying her own
affectionate little heart, by running to tell her dear mamma, who truly
rejoiced in every proof of Matilda's amendment, and doubted not but it
would prove the forerunner of virtue, in a child who appeared convinced of
her faults, and desirous of improving herself.
It was now near Christmas, and Mrs. Harewood was inquiring for a
boarding-school where she could place Miss Hanson. She would have
preferred to keep her at home, and have a governess, who might attend to
the instructions necessary both for her and Ellen; but the bad temper and
insolent airs of Matilda had prevented this, as Mrs. Harewood could not
bear the idea of subjecting an amiable young person, whom she designed for
that situation, to be tormented with such a girl. She knew that, in
schools, two faults seldom fail to be cured: these are impertinence, or
insolence, and affectation--one rendering a person disagreeable, the other
ridiculous; and every member in the community of which a school consists,
is ready to assist the ruler in punishing the one, and laughing at the
other.
One morning, when Matilda got out of bed, she went to look whether the
morning was fine, and the moment she got to the window, eagerly cried out,
in great surprise--"Ellen, Ellen! get up this moment, and come to the
window; the whole world is covered with white! and see, there are thousands
and thousands of little white feathers coming from the skies, as if the
angels were emptying feather-beds upon the earth."
"It snows," said Ellen, calmly; "I recollect my papa told us you had never
seen it snow."
"What is snow?"
"We will ask Edmund; he can tell you much better than I can."
The surprising appearance thus witnessed, induced Matilda to hasten down
stairs, where Edmund was writing his Latin exercise.--"Do pray tell me,"
she cried, "what snow is, and why I never saw it before?"
"Snow," said Edmund, "is nothing but drops of rain, which, in passing
through the cold air, become congealed or frozen. If you take this pretty
light substance into your warm hand, it will melt and become a rain-drop
again."
As Edmund spoke, he opened the window a very little way, caught some snow,
and showed her the effect he spoke of.
"But why did I never see this in Barbadoes?"
"Because Barbadoes lies nearer to the sun than England, and is much warmer,
even in winter; therefore the rain-drops never pass through that region of
cold air which freezes them in northern climates. If you were to go farther
north, you would find still more snow and ice, the same I saw you looking
at yesterday. I will lend you a little book, where you will see a
description of a palace of ice, and of whole mountains of snow, called
Glaciers; and, if you please, I will show you that part of the globe, or
earth, in which those effects begin to take place. But, my dear Ellen, pray
lend Matilda your tippet, for she looks as much frozen as the snow; she
must take great care of herself in this cold climate."
Ellen threw the pinafore she was going to put on over the neck of the
shuddering Matilda, and then ran nimbly before them towards the globe, on
which Edmund was going to lecture, neither of them looking in Matilda's
face; but Charles, who just then happened to enter, perceived that silent
tears were coursing each other down her cheek. His compassion was moved; he
apprehended that the cold, which he felt himself to be severe, had made her
ill, and he inquired what was the matter with her, in a tone of real
commiseration.
"I am so--so very ignorant," said Matilda, sobbing.
"Oh, that's it!" cried Charles, gaily; "then you and I may shake hands, for
I am ignorant too."
"Oh no, European children know every thing, but I am little better than a
negro; I find what your mamma said was very true--I know nothing at all."
"Dear Matilda, how can you say so?" said Edmund; "though you have not read
as much as we have, yet you have seen a great deal more than any of us,
and you are the youngest of the company, you know. Consider, you have
crossed the Atlantic Ocean, seen groves of orange-trees and spices grow,
and the whole process of sugar-making. You know the inside of a ship as
well as a house, and we never saw any thing better than a sloop, or sailed
any where but on the Thames."
"Besides," said Charles, "you have seen monkeys and parrots, and many other
creatures, in their own country, and many curious fish on your voyage. Oh,
you understand natural history much better than we do."
"And if you understand nothing at all," added Ellen, kindly pressing her
hand, "mamma says it is only _wilful_ ignorance that is blameable."
Matilda wept still more while the children thus tried to comfort her. This
distressed them all; but they rejoiced to see their parents enter the room,
persuaded that they would be able to comfort her better, and Ellen
instantly besought their attention to the subject by relating as much of
the foregoing conversation as was necessary.
"No, no, it is not exactly _that_ I am crying for," said Matilda,
interrupting her; "it is because I have been so very naughty, and you are
all so--so--so----"
"So what, my dear?" said Mr. Harewood, drawing her towards him, and placing
her by his side, in the same manner he was accustomed to let Ellen stand,
when she was much in his favour.
The action, however kindly meant, for a time redoubled her tears; and the
children, understanding their mamma's look, withdrew to the room where they
usually breakfasted, without the least symptom of discontent, although they
perceived their mamma fill a cup of tea for Matilda at her own table.
When they were gone, and the little girl had somewhat recovered, Mr.
Harewood whispered her--"Did you mean to say, my dear, that my children
were so clever, or so proud, or so what?"
"Oh, sir, they are so _good_! that was what I wanted to say; for there was
Edmund who always looked so grave, and was poring over his books, he talked
to me quite kindly, and never made the least game of me, for all I must
look like a fool in his eyes, who has seen the snow all his life. And then
Charles, who is so full of fun and nonsense, and who I always thought could
not abide me, he spoke to me as if he was sorry for me, and made it out
that we were both ignorant alike; and when I remembered how I had looked at
them, and behaved to them, I felt as if my heart would break. Ellen is
always so good, that I did not think so much of her kindness, but nobody
knows----"
Again the repentant girl wept, and at length with difficulty
proceeded--"Nobody knows how dearly I love her, and _you_ too."
She received the kindest assurances from both Mr. and Mrs. Harewood of
their affection, and that they fully believed she would conquer her bad
temper, now she saw how much it was not only her duty, but happiness to do
so; and Mr. Harewood assured her that he had no doubt, but in the course of
a few years, he should see her as sensible, good, and well-informed, as his
own children.
"And then I shall not be an object of pity, sir?"
"No, you will be one of affection and esteem."
"Oh, I doubt that must never, _never_ be!"
"Never despair; though you have many battles with yourself, yet never
relinquish the hope of final conquest, and be assured you will find every
victory easier than the last. When you find pride rising in your heart,
think on your ignorance, and it will make you humble; and when you are
inclined to be angry with those around you, remember what you have this day
confessed respecting their kindness, and it will make you bear with the
present vexation; and if at any time you are discomfited in any pursuit,
either of virtue or knowledge, recollect what I now say, that, with many
faults, yet you have some merit, and may therefore reasonably hope to
attain more."
"Have I indeed?" said the now-humbled girl.
"Yes, you have an inquiring mind, which is one great step towards the
attainment of knowledge, and you are sincere and open-hearted, which
enables your friends to see what is the real bent of your disposition, and
to give you the advice really necessary; and I hope, with this groundwork
of good, you will be a very different girl when your mother again sees
you."
Mr. Harewood left Matilda quieted, but deeply impressed by what he had
said.