There was of olden time in the land of Egypt a Fellah, or tiller
of the ground, who had a fair woman to wife and she had another
man to friend. The husband used to sow every year some fifty
fadd�n[FN#467] of seeding-wheat wherein there was not one
barley-grain, and grind it in the mill and pass this meal to his
spouse who would sift it and bolt it. Then would she take the
softest and best of the flour to make thereof either scones or
cakes[FN#468] or something more toothsome which she would give to
her friend and feed him therewith, whereas the refuse of the
flour[FN#469] she would make into loaves for her husband so this
bread would be ruddy-brown of hue.[FN#470] Now every day about
dawn-time the Fellah was wont fare to his field either to ear or
to delve and tarry there working till noon at which time the wife
would send him the bread of bran and refuse flour, whilst to
those beside him who wrought as he did, would be brought from
their homes white bread and clean. So they said, "Ho certain
person! thy wheat is from fine sowing-seed, nor is there in it a
barley-corn, how then be your bread like unto barley?" Quoth he,
"I know not." He remained in such case for a while of time whilst
his wife fed her playmate with all the good food and served to
her husband the vilest of diet, until one chance day of the days
the Fellah took his plough and went off at early dawn to work and
wrought till midday when his wife sent him his dinner of dirty
bread. Hereupon he and his neighhours, who were earing in the
same field, took seat and each one set before him white bread and
seeing the Fellah's scones brown as barley-meal they marvelled
thereat. They had with them a scald-head boy who was sitting with
them at the noon-meal, so they said to the peasant, "Take thee to
servant this youngster and he shall manifest thee the case
wherein thou art from the doings of thy dame." He obeyed their
bidding--And Shahrazad was suprised by the dawn of day and fell
silent and ceased to say her permitted say. Then quoth her sister
Dunyazad, "How sweet is thy story, O sister mine, and how
enjoyable and delectable!" Quoth she, "And where is this compared
with that I would relate to you on the coming night an the King
suffer me to survive?" Now when it was the next night, and that
was
The Seven Hundred and Seventy-eighth Night,
Dunyazad said to her, "Allah upon thee, O my sister, an thou be
other than sleepy, finish for us thy tale that we may cut short
the watching of this our latter night!" She replied, "With love
and good will!" It hath reached me, O auspicious King, the
director, the right-guiding, lord of the rede which is benefiting
and of deeds fair-seeming and worthy celebrating, that the Fellah
obeyed their bidding and took with him the scald-head youngster
for house-service and on the second day the lad fell to grinding
at the mill and carried the meal to his mistress and sat beside
her and anon she rose and sifted and bolted the flour; still he
stayed by her stealthily watching her while she kneaded it and
balled it and breaded it. After this he carried off the early
meal for his master and faring to the field set it before him and
when the Fellah looked upon it he cried, "O Boy, by Allah this
bread is white and 'tis clean unlike the foregone." Quoth he, "O
my master, I have ground it with my own hands and I sat beside my
mistress the while she got it ready, kneading it and baking it,
wherefor she availed not to do aught else with it." Now when the
servant-lad had left the hut her lover came in asking, "Hast thou
made bread for me?" and she answered, "Indeed the boy with the
scald-head ceased not sitting beside me, nor was I able to bake
aught for thee." But when the lad had gone forth to the field
with his master's dinner he set it before him and returned in hot
haste and hurry to the house, where he found the friend of his
mistress conversing with her; so he hid himself behind the door
and fell to overhearing them and to noting whatso they said.
Amongst other things quoth she, "Take this quartern of good wheat
and clean grain and grind it in this mill and I will make thee a
platter of bread from handrubbed flour[FN#471] which I will send
to thee on the morrow." Asked he, "How shalt thou know the
field?" and she answered, "Carry with thee a basket of bran and
drop the contents as thou walkest along the highway; then leave
it hard by the land belonging to thee and I will follow the
traces and find thee a-field; and so do thou remain at rest." All
this and the scald-head boy was standing behind the door
hearkening to their words until he had understood them all. On
the next day the lad took a basket of bran which he scattered on
the way to his master's land and then sat with him whilst the
wife, after baking the platter full of scones, carried it upon
her head and fared forth intending for her lover in the field.
She marked the traces of the bran which the scald-head had
dropped and she ceased not following them until she came to her
husband's field. Hereupon the lad arose and taking the platter
from her said, "By Allah, O my master, verily my mistress loveth
thee and favoureth thee, for that she hath brought a bannock made
from handrubbed grain;" and so saying he set it before him.
Presently she looked out of the corner of her eye and saw her
lover ploughing at a little distance from them; so she said to
her husband, "Allah upon thee, O certain person, call aloud to
so-and-so our neighbour that he may come and eat the noon-meal
with thee." The man said, "'Tis well;" and presently added, "O
Boy, go forth and shout to such-an-one." Now the lad had brought
with him a parcel of green dates, so he arose and scattered them
at intervals upon the highway; and when he came to his mistress's
lover he cried aloud, "Do thou come dine with my master." But the
man refused so to do wherefore the scald-head returned and said,
"He will not;" and hereupon the wife bade her husband go himself
and fetch him. The Fellah trudged along the highway and finding
thereon the scattered dates bowed himself downwards to gather
them when the lover said to himself, "This one is picking up
stones wherewith to beat me;'"[FN#472] and as he saw the man
often stoop he fled and left the place, and the more the other
cried to him, "Come hither, O certain person," the faster sped he
in his running.--And Shahrazad was suprised by the dawn of day
and fell silent and ceased saying her permitted say. Then quoth
her sister Dunyazad, "How sweet and tasteful is thy tale, O
sister mine, and how enjoyable and delectable!" Quoth she, "And
where is this compared with that I would relate to you on the
coming night an the Sovran suffer me to survive?" Now when it was
the next night and that was
The Seven Hundred and Seventy-ninth Night,
Dunyazad said to her, "Allah upon thee, O my sister, an thou be
other than sleepy, finish for us thy tale that we may cut short
the watching of this our latter night!" She replied, "With love
and good will!" It hath reached me, O auspicious King, the
director, the right-guiding, lord of the rede which is
benefiting, and of deeds fair-seeming and worthy celebrating,
that the more that man cried to the lover "Come," the faster did
he run away; so the Fellah returned and said, "He misliketh to
come and he hath fled." Hereupon he took seat together with the
scald-head and the neighbours to dine off the scones of
hand-rubbed grain, and the wife served to them whatso she had
made for her lover's eating and she would not touch aught thereof
but left it for her spouse and for his servant and for the
neighbours. On the following day the Fellah went forth betimes to
plough whilst the boy, delaying purposely at home, hid himself
behind the door when behold, the lover entered to her, and she
said, " 'Tis my desire that we forge a story whereby to slay my
husband and Master Scald-head the servant." Quoth he, "How wilt
thou slay them?" and quoth she, "I will buy for them poison and
make it up in cooked food, so they may devour it together and
perish together; after which we will abide, I and thou, making
merry, nor shall the dead disturb us any more." He rejoined, "Do
what thou willest," and all this whilst the boy stood listening
to them behind the door. But as soon as the lover went forth the
house, the lad arose and retired; then, donning Jews' garb he
shouldered a pair of saddle-bags and went about crying, "Ho!
Aloes good for use. Ho! Pepper[FN#473] good for use. Ho! Kohl
good for use. Ho! Tutty good for use!" Now when the woman saw him
she came forth the house and hailed him, "Ho thou the Jew!" and
said he to her, "Yes, O my lady." Then said she, "Hast thou with
thee aught of poison?" and said he, "How, O my lady? Have I not
with me poison of the hour?[FN#474] and whoever shall eat thereof
in a mess of sweet milk[FN#475] and rice and clarified butter
shall die within that time." "Do thou take this dinar," continued
she, "and give me somewhat of it;" but he rejoined, "I do not
trade for moneys, and I will sell it only for ornaments of
precious metal." Hereupon she pulled off one of her anklets and
handed it to him and he, who had provided himself with half a
loaf of Egyptian sugar,[FN#476] gave her the moiety thereof,
saying, "Use it with sweet milk and rice and clarified butter."
She took it in high glee, and arising milked the she-buffalo,
after which she boiled the loaf-sugar in the milk and then threw
it into a sufficiency of the rice and the clarified butter,
fancying the while that she was cooking a mortal meal,[FN#477]
and lastly she ladled out the mess into a large platter. Now when
it was sunset-time her husband returned from the field and was
met about half-way by the boy who told him all that he had
overheard and how he had sold her the sugar for one of her
anklets, saying, "This be poison." Then he charged him that, as
soon as both of them should have swallowed the mess of milk and
rice and clarified butter, they fall down and feign dead. So
master and servant agreed upon this plan. And when the Fellah
entered the hut she served to them the platter which contained
their supper, and they ate the whole thereof, she sitting by
intent upon their action and expecting their death. But they
served her with a sleight; for suddenly the Fellah changed
countenance and made as though he waxed ill and faint, and fell
upon the ground like one in the last agony, and shortly after the
boy rolled upon the floor on similar wise. Whenas she considered
them she exclaimed, "May Allah have no mercy upon you; the
wretches are dead!" Hereupon she went out and called aloud to her
lover, and as he was coming cried, "Hie thee hither and enjoy the
sight of these dead ones;" so he hastened up to them, and seeing
them stretched upon the door said, "They're dead." Presently
quoth she, "We two, I and thou, will now make merry;" and so
saying she withdrew with him into another hut, intending at once
to sleep together. Hereupon the husband arose and went in to them
and smote the lover with a quarter-staff upon the neck and broke
in his back bone,[FN#478] after which he turned to the wicked
woman his wife and struck her and split open her head, and left
the twain stone dead. And as soon as it was midnight he wrapped
them in a single sheet and carried them forth outside the
village, and after choosing a place,[FN#479] dug a hole and
thrust them therein. And ever after that same Fellah had rest
from his wife, and he bound himself by a strong oath not to
interwed with womankind-never no more.[FN#480] And now (quoth
Shahrazad) I will recount to you another tale touching the wiles
of women; and thereupon she fell to relating the adventure of
THE WOMAN WHO HUMOURED HER LOVER AT
HER HUSBAND'S EXPENSE.[FN#481]
There was a man in Cairo and he had a wife who ever boasted of
her gentle blood and her obedience and her docility and her fear
of the Lord. Now she happened to have in the house a pair of
fatted ganders[FN#482] and she also had a lover whom she kept in
the background. Presently the man came to visit her and seeing
beside her the plump birds felt his appetite sharpened by them,
so he said to her, "O Such-an-one, needs must thou let cook these
two geese with the best of stuffing so that we may make merry
over them, for that my mind is bent upon eating goose-flesh."
Quoth she, "'Tis right easy; and by thy life, O So-and-so, I will
slaughter them and stuff them and thou shalt take them and carry
them home with thee and eat them, nor shall this pimp my husband
taste of them or even smell them." "How wilt thou do?" asked he,
and she answered, "I will serve him a sleight shall enter into
his brains and then give them to thee, for none is dear to me as
thyself, O thou light of mine eyes; whereas this pander my mate
shall not touch a bittock thereof." Upon this agreement the lover
went from her and when her husband returned at sunset-tide she
said to him, "Ho Man, how canst thou ever call thyself a man when
thou never invitest anybody to thy house and no day of the days
thou sayest me, 'I have a guest coming to us,' even as another
would do; and folk surely will talk of thee and declare thou art
a miser and unknowing the ways of generosity." "O Woman," said
he, "this were for me an easy business and to-morrow morning
(Inshallah!) I will buy for thee flesh and rice and thou shalt
let cook for us or dinner or supper, whereto I will invite one of
my intimates." Quoth she to him, "Nay, O Man; rather do thou buy
for me a pound of mince-meat; then slaughter the two geese and I
will stuff them and fry them, for that nothing is more savoury to
set before guests." Said he, "Upon my head and mine eye be it!"
and as soon as it was dawn he slaughtered the geese and went
forth and bought a Rotolo of meat which he minced and took all
was required of rice and hot spices and what not else. These he
carried home to his wife and said to her, "Do thou finish off thy
cooking before midday when I will bring my guests," and presently
he fared forth from her. Then she arose and cleaned out the geese
and stuffed them with minced meat and a portion of rice and
almonds and raisins;[FN#483] and fried them until they were well
cooked; after which she sent for her lover and as soon as he came
she and he made merry together, and she gave him the geese which
he took up and left her.--And Shahrazad was surprised by the dawn
of day and fell silent and ceased to say her permitted say. Then
quoth her sister Dunyazad, "How sweet is thy story, O sister
mine, and how enjoyable and delectable!" Quoth she, "And where is
this compared with that I would relate to you on the coming night
an the King suffer me to survive?" Now when it was the next night
and that was
The Seven Hundred and Eighty-first Night,
Dunyazad said to her, "Allah upon thee, O my sister, an thou be
other than sleepy, finish for us thy tale that we may cut short
the watching of this our latter night." She replied, "With love
and good will!" It hath reached me, O auspicious King, the
director, the right-guiding, lord of the rede which is benefiting
and of deeds fair-seeming and worthy celebrating, that the woman
gave to her lover the geese which she had fried and he took the
twain and fared away with them. Now when it was noon suddenly her
husband came home accompanied by a friend and knocked at the
door; so she arose and opened to him and admitted them. Then she
asked, "And hast thou brought only one man?[FN#484] hie thee
forth and fetch at least two or better still three." "'Tis well,"
said he and went off to do her bidding. Then the woman accosted
the guest who came first and cried, "Oh the pity of it! By Allah
thou art lost and the L� Haul of Allah[FN#485] is upon thee and
doubtless thou hast no children." Now when the man heard these
words he exclaimed, "Why, O Woman?" for indeed fear and affright
had sunk deep into his heart. She rejoined, "Verily my husband
hath not brought thee hither save with the intention of cutting
off thy precious stones the honours of thy yard[FN#486] and of
gelding thee to a Castrato; and heigho and alas for thee whether
thou die or whether thou live, and Oh the pity of it for thee!"
Now when the man heard this speech, he arose in haste and hurry
and rushed out by the door, when behold, the husband came
bringing with him two of his familiars. So the wife met him at
the entrance and said to him, "O Man, O miserablest of men, O
thou disappointed, O thou dissatisfied,[FN#487] thou hast brought
to me a fellow which was a thief, a ne'er-do-well like unto
thyself." "How so?" asked he, and she answered, "The man stole
the two geese and stole away." Thereupon the husband went out and
catching sight of the guest running off shouted to him, "Come
back! Come back! even although thou bring only one with thee and
take the other." Cried the man in reply, "An thou catch me do
thou take thee the two." But the house-master meant the two geese
whilst the man who was running away thought only of himself,
saying in his mind, "This one speaketh of my ballocks, meaning
that he will take only one of my stones[FN#488] and leave me the
other." So he ceased not running and the other followed after
him, but being unable to catch him he returned to his guests and
served them with somewhat of bread and so forth, whilst the woman
kept blaming him and knagging about the matter of the geese which
she said had been carried off, but which had been given by her to
her lover. The husband enjoined her to silence; however she would
not hold her peace[FN#489] and on this wise he was balked of the
meal to feed his wife's friend. And now (quoth Shahrazad) I will
relate to you somewhat of the wiles of an honest woman, and
thereupon she fell to recounting the adventure of