SIR,--I find that the law recently passed against tips to Dustmen is
quite unknown--at all events, to the Dustmen themselves. My servants,
I find, go on freely bribing these functionaries, to remove bones and
vegetable refuse. Their rate of tipping, as far as I can make out,
is about a halfpenny per bone. If I were now to enforce the law and
forbid tips, I foresee that the Dustcarts would have pressing business
elsewhere, and would visit me about once a month. Then would follow
a _régime_ of "big, big, D.s"--in the window--which would be
intolerable. I prefer tipping to typhoid.
Yours long sufferingly, VICTIM OF THE VESTRIES.
SIR,--The Vestry is _quite right_ to insist on every house burning up
its own odds and ends. The _true_ domestic motto is--"Every kitchen
its own crematorium." I do this _habitually_, out of _public spirit_.
It is true that a sickening odour permeates the house for an hour
or two of every day, created by the combustion of dinner remnants;
also that most of my family suffer from bad sore throats, which they
attribute to this cause. What of that? The _truly good Citizen_ will
prefer to poison himself rather than his neighbours.