(_A PAGE FROM THE NEWGATE CALENDAR--UP-TO-DATE EDITION._)
The two Convicts were tried at the same Assizes, put in the same dock
and sentenced by the same Judge. So a companionship sprang up between
them considering that one was by birth and education a Gentlemen, and
the other was not. And they went to the same prison, and listened
to the same words of the same Chaplain, and took their occasional
exercise in the same practising yard. And as luck would have it, they
served the same time, and were liberated at the same moment.
"I am afraid I must say good-bye, GILES," said ST. JAMES, as they
emerged into freedom from the portals of the gaol. "Good fellow as you
are, GILES, you do not belong to my set, and your presence would be
embarrassing."
"Oh, would it!" returned GILES, who had already recognised some of his
friends. "Well, I don't want to press my company on anyone."
"No offence!" exclaimed ST. JAMES, "I beg you--no offence! But we have
both to begin life again, and union is not strength in a case such as
ours!"
"Oh, no offence!" acquiesced GILES, as he accompanied some of his pals
to a neighbouring public-house.
ST. JAMES, left to his own devices, hurried to the Chambers that he
used to rent before he went to prison. They were "To Let." He rang the
bell, and the porter started back when he saw him.
"Hope you don't want to enter, Sir," said he; "but the Guv'nor gave
strict orders, as if you called, that you was not to go in. It ain't
my fault, Sir, but the Guv'nor is the Guv'nor!"
Disheartened by this rebuff, he tried the house of a friend, but
was so scornfully received, that he made up his mind never to visit
another acquaintance. Of course he found that his name had been
removed from his Clubs, and not a single individual would recognise
him. He was an outcast, and a ruined man. So he walked about the
streets until his shoes were in holes, and his last penny exhausted.
Then he lay down to sleep. But this was against the regulations, and
so he was hustled from pillar to post, until at last he found himself
in a very low part of town. He was trudging past a public-house,
when who should emerge from its cheerful-looking recesses but GILES.
"Hallo!" cried the young man, who seemed the picture of health, "are
_you_ down?"
"Yes--very," returned ST. JAMES. "I haven't a friend in the world, and
no one will have anything to say to me."
"What a shame!" cried the other. "Why, with me, I have had a rare old
time! Everybody has been pleased to see me."
"But hasn't your conviction injured you?"
"Not particularly. I have lots of people who support me. Why, if we
were _too_ particular with one another, we shouldn't have a pal in the
world! Hope there's nothing wrong."
"Why, don't you call this wrong? Here are you, as jolly as possible,
and I--a miserable man!"
"Can't be helped. We are in the same box."
"Are we?" said the semi-genteel Convict. "Well, I should have scarcely
believed it! Then, I suppose I must comfort myself with the thought
that the same law applies to the rich as the poor."
"Does it?" returned the commoner Convict. "Then all I can say is, that
whatever the law may be, the punishment is never the same." And ST.
JAMES, with a bitter sigh, wished he could change places with his more
fortunate dock-mate.
* * * * *
THE CHEF'S NEW DISH FOR TRAVELLERS.--"_Insurance of Passengers'
Luggage_."--Bravo, THOMAS COOK AND SON! Not "too many Cooks," but
"just Cooks enough!" Hitherto the traveller had only to present
himself ready "dressed" to be thoroughly Cook'd, and done throughout,
to a turn. Now, in addition, his baggage can be book'd and Cook'd;
and, should any "_Gravy delictum_" happen to it, the value of the lost
portmanteau and boxes will be handed over to the aggrieved passenger.
* * * * *
PATHETIC DESCRIPTION OF THE PRESENT STATE OF MR. GEORGE
ALEXANDER.--"He is running WILDE at the St. James's Theatre.--Yours,
L.W.F."
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