her friends. Meet her on the street and she will treat you to a
cheery smile and a soft greeting that has a sweet little melody all
its own. Such a woman makes the nightingales sing in one’s heart. She
doesn’t send souls into deep mourning as does the whiny woman or the
grouchy person or the suffering sister with woes that bury you like an
avalanche.
Plenty of persons have troubles, but they don’t shake them out and
beat the dust out of them and hang them up in the air all the time and
display them for the entertainment of their acquaintances. There is no
such thing as being without troubles, and when you run across a woman
who gives you a smile and a bright little word don’t tell yourself that
it is easy for her, that she hasn’t anything to worry about.
One never knows. She may have, all buried in the depths of her heart,
more trouble to the square inch than you have ever heard about. It
doesn’t pay to be grumpy. Not a bit of it. It doesn’t pay to be a
member of the Tearful Society, either. The only thing that counts is a
brave heart filled to the roof with simple, honest charity.
You have seen those awful parlors, haven’t you, in the country
districts, where the shades are always drawn and Mme. Moth has garden
parties in every corner of the carpet and funereal pictures hang from
the wall, and when you open the door you are struck deaf, dumb, blind,
and senseless with the frightful mustiness that finally chases you out
in the free air?
Some persons shut up their hearts just the same way. Open up the
windows. Let sunshine fairies mob the place. Scatter the moths of
mortal mind helter-skelter and dig out the bad-conscience corners.
You will have a nice, clean, hygienic feeling after your heart
housecleaning.
Suddenly you will find you are having a garden party there; you will
find yourself entertaining beautiful thoughts, and you will wonder
how you ever lived under the old régime when you displayed so little
hospitality. It is a fine thing to know how to welcome the big feelings
of life. Don’t forget that laughter is a good tonic and a near-panacea
for many ills.
LOTION FOR THAT “TIRED” FEELING
Take one-quarter pint of alcohol--the recipe can be doubled or tripled
if desired--one ounce each of spirits of camphor and ammonia, two and a
half ounces of sea salt and one pint of boiling water; mix thoroughly
and always shake before using. If a woman comes in tired from a day’s
shopping, a long walk, or any other wearying exertion, apply the tonic
to the face and arms, and it will magically remove all of that “tired”
feeling and put one in fine condition for the evening.
Another delightful and refreshing bath water, which is said to come
from Portugal, is made from two and one-half ounces each of eau de
rose and eau fleur d’orange, one and a quarter ounces of eau de myrte,
one-half drachm of essence of ambergris and one-quarter drachm of
essence of musk. After thoroughly commingling the ingredients, keep
closely corked in a bottle for a week in the dark--it were better if
it remained even two weeks--then pour off the clear liquid. A little
poured into the basin of water in which the face is washed will revive
and freshen the complexion wonderfully.
ONE SIDE OF THE FINANCIAL QUESTION BETWEEN MAN AND WIFE
The philosophy of clothes is a serious study, and instead of
being frowned upon by men, who invariably associate it with wild
extravagance, it should be incorporated as first among the bylaws
of home life. Women in many cases are largely responsible for the
troubles and misunderstandings which arise, brought about, as they
often are, on the very threshold of married life.
When a husband admires the stylish appearance of his bride’s traveling
gown she is apt to be tempted by the irresponsible imp of mischief
to answer, “It cost but a trifle.” In fact, she may burst out with
the fiction that she “never spends money on gowns.” This small and
unnecessary explosion may win her a tithe of praise at the moment; but
it also paves the way for an embarrassing future if she proposes to
live up to the fairy tale.
It is curious that the most honest, frank, and truthful women will
often hesitate or even fib when asking for domestic expenses, and the
most generous and loyal fellow in the world, who lives to spend his
dollars like the farmer sows his wheat, looks “concerned,” to be mild
in our expression, when the woman whom he loves and trusts looks to him
for the weekly stipend.
The wife of a millionaire, who never made anything but her own
complexion, boasted that her husband was under the impression that
she designed and made her own gowns and bonnets. This she had told
him on their wedding journey, and she could never pluck up courage to
undeceive him.
A little honesty at the start would make the financial side of
matrimony much more pleasant; hence it is difficult to understand why
a woman prevaricates when the broad way of truth is easier--unless,
indeed, she be tied to a man who “rows” every time money is mentioned.
Perhaps he doesn’t mean it. So few of them understand that the very
need of asking hurts and humiliates, even grieves, a proud woman.
A fine, jolly man rallied his wife once on her diffidence in this
manner: “Ashamed to come to me for anything? Nonsense! You can come to
me as you go to God.” And he never realized the supreme egotism of his
speech. So long as she did not smile over it, all went well.
Women hesitate to discuss unpleasant matters with their husbands, and
at an early stage they are made to feel that money is an extremely
unpleasant subject. Hence they resort to all sorts of foolish
subterfuges to obtain possession without open speech. This does not
class them among deceivers. A woman is simply more careful than a man
in her methods, fearing she will give offence.
Nature sets us an example for “all things new.” She never wears the
castaway leaves of past seasons. There is no remade foliage on the
trees, no flaunting of spring colors in November. The late skies are
veiled in tints the summer never saw and the earth in her old age is as
changeful as a merry maid in her teens.
The influence of dress is greater than we will acknowledge. We feel
better, act better and bring more honor to those who love us when we
are properly gowned. An ill-dressed woman may possess the wisdom of a
sage, or the beauty of a goddess; but among her sisters she is at a
tremendous disadvantage unless she is like unto them in the glory of
her raiment.
SHOULD HE MARRY?
The Man--
Who goes home to grumble and growl;
Who thinks he can keep house much better than his wife;
Who cannot remember his wife’s birthday nor the anniversary of their
marriage;
Who believes that no one below the status of an angel should be his
helpmate;
Who decides his wife is “fixed” for the season if she has one new gown;
Who imagines a woman’s bonnet should cost about $1.95;
Who fancies that his wife exists for the comfort and convenience of his
mother and sisters;
Who provides himself with a family and trusts in providence to produce
a home and something to eat;
Who labors under the delusion that his wife’s money belongs to him;
Who advises his sick wife to be up and doing and she will feel ever so
much better;
Who doesn’t know what a woman wants with ready cash when she has credit
at a dry-goods store;
Who forgets his manners as soon as he steps across his own threshold;
Who thinks a dining-room carpet should last a lifetime;
Who constantly talks about supporting a wife, when she is working
fourteen hours a day, including Sunday;
Who declares it all nonsense for a woman to want a ten-cent bunch of
violets when she hasn’t seen a flower for five months;
Who quotes the Apostle Paul on the “woman question” and firmly believes
the mantle of the holy man has fallen upon his shoulders;
Who looks upon his wife as a mental waste-paper basket into which he
dumps the chips of ideas he has collected during the day.
SHOULD SHE MARRY?
The Woman--
Who buys for the mere pleasure of buying;
Who expects a declaration of love three times a day;
Who anticipates in married life a good easy snap;
Who thinks it cheaper to buy bread than bake it;
Who would rather die than wear the same bonnet the second season;
Who wants to refurnish her house every spring;
Who stays at home only because she has no other place to visit;
Who would rather nurse a pug dog than a baby;
Who thinks she can get $5,000 worth of style out of a $1,000 salary;
Who does not realize how many pennies, nickels, dimes, quarters, and
halves there are in $1;
Who marries in order to have some one pay her bills;
Who thinks embroidered centre-pieces and doylies are of more importance
than sheets, pillow-cases, and blankets;
Who buys bric-à-brac for her drawing-room and borrows kitchen utensils
from her neighbors;
Who cares more for the style of her winter furs than she does for the
health and comfort of her family;
Who thinks the cook and nursemaid can run the house;
Who weeps over the woes of the heroine in a trashy novel while ignoring
domestic tragedies directly under her own nose.
DON’TS UP TO DATE
FOLLOW RULES AND BE HEALTHY AND WISE, IF NOT OTHERWISE
Don’t exercise after you feel exhausted.
Don’t fail to laugh at your husband’s jokes.
Don’t treat your family to a morning view of hair-curlers.
Don’t neglect the daily bath if you want a radiant complexion.
Don’t forget that diet, quiet, and sleep are the hand-maidens of beauty.
Don’t be afraid of sunshine and fresh air; they give bloom and color.
Don’t wear the high collar. It ruins the line and curve of the neck and
hardens the flesh and often leaves its mark.
Don’t talk when you are hoarse. Your voice may be permanently lost or
difficulties of the throat result.
Don’t ride in an open carriage or near the open window of a car after
playing golf or exercising in a vigorous way.
Don’t exercise one part of the body too much and another not at all.
Let the development be symmetrical.
Don’t become so burdened with the accumulation of knowledge that you
cannot spare time for a good hearty laugh.
Don’t think any “old dress will do for home.” Always wear a pretty and
becoming gown.
Don’t tell your husband you wish you hadn’t married him. The chances
are that you don’t wish it any more than he does.
Don’t believe you can get rid of wrinkles by filling in the crevices
with powder. Instead, give your face a warm bath and good scrub, night
and morning.
Don’t take a long walk or undertake much household work before
breakfast. Vitality is not at its best early in the morning. Strength
increases as the sun rises and one is stronger about midday.
TRANSCRIBER’S NOTES:
Italicized text is surrounded by underscores: _italics_.
Obvious typographical errors have been corrected.
Inconsistencies in hyphenation have been standardized.
Archaic or variant spelling has been retained.