(_The advancing price of rice has occupied much space in the papers of
late._)
Maud, when you turned me down (a year to-morrow),
Bidding me rise from off my suppliant knee,
And, while regretful if you caused me sorrow,
Murmured, "Sebastian, it can never be,"
I did not lay aside my fond ambition;
I told myself, in spite of what occurred,
"This is her lunch or three o'clock edition,
And not her final word."
I merely marvelled at your eccentricity,
Feeling convinced amid my blank amaze
That, though you might "absent you from felicity
Awhile," 'twas but a temporary phase;
Convinced the mood impelling you to stifle
The aspirations that I'd dared outline
Was simply due to some extraneous trifle,
Not any flaw of mine.
A chill or toothache might have vexed you greatly;
Perhaps you had a corn inclined to shoot,
Or possibly the sugar shortage lately
Had proved itself abnormally acute;
In short, I felt that, though unkindly treated,
A happier time to me would surely come,
When my request (impassioned) would be greeted
With no down-pointing thumb.
Maud, it occurs to me you shunned a marriage
Because that function, otherwise "quite nice,"
Involved the facing of a friendly "barrage"
Mainly composed of valedictory rice,
Stinging the cheek and nestling in the clothing;
If that was so, I share the feeling, sweet;
For rice in puddings I've no special loathing,
But I detest it neat.
If such your reason was, there 's no material
Objection to our union to-day;
No risk remains of that offensive cereal
Being employed in such a reckless way;
You can say "Yes" without one apprehensive
Thought that your brother is, a deadly shot;
Rice as a missile now is too expensive.
Anything doing--what?
* * * * *
"According to a Paris report, an Anglo-British force of 50,000
are on their way to occupy Constantinople."--_Daily Paper_.
It is, no doubt, the peculiar composition of this force that has
aroused the apprehensions of French chauvinists.
* * * * *
"Denikin's troops are fleeing partly in steamers, partly along
the coast, leaving a large booby." _"Planters and Commercial
Gazette" (Mauritius)._
"A Bolshevist wireless says the Reds captured Tagonrog,
Denikin's former headquarters, taking a huge booby."--_Same
Paper_.
The booby prize has apparently been awarded to the Reds, but we feel
that our contemporary might have put in a claim.
* * * * *
[Illustration: THE FORGOTTEN CAUSE.
MAN IN THE STREET. "WELL, IF THE OTHER ALLIES SAY SO TOO, THERE MUST
BE SOMETHING IN IT. BUT _I_ ALWAYS UNDERSTOOD THE _GOVERNMENT_ WAS TO
BLAME FOR EVERYTHING."]
* * * * *