_Scare_. Sir, I have brought you a libel against the ministry.
_Book_. Sir, I shall not take anything against them;--for I have
two in the press already. [_Aside_.
_Scare_. Then, sir, I have an Apology in defence of them.
_Book_. That I shall not meddle with neither; they don't sell so
well.
_Scare_. I have a translation of Virgil's Aeneid, with notes on
it, if we can agree about the price.
_Book_. Why, what price would you have?
_Scare_. You shall read it first, otherwise how will you know the
value?
_Book_. No, no, sir, I never deal that way--a poem is a poem, and
a pamphlet a pamphlet with me. Give me a good handsome large volume,
with a full promising title-page at the head of it, printed on a good
paper and letter, the whole well bound and gilt, and I'll warrant its
selling. You have the common error of authors, who think people buy
books to read. No, no, books are only bought to furnish libraries, as
pictures and glasses, and beds and chairs, are for other rooms. Look
ye, sir, I don't like your title-page: however, to oblige a young
beginner, I don't care if I do print it at my own expence.
_Scare_. But pray, sir, at whose expence shall I eat?
_Book_. At whose? Why, at mine, sir, at mine. I am as great a
friend to learning as the Dutch are to trade: no one can want bread
with me who will earn it; therefore, sir, if you please to take your
seat at my table, here will be everything necessary provided for you:
good milk porridge, very often twice a day, which is good wholesome
food and proper for students; a translator too is what I want at
present, my last being in Newgate for shop-lifting. The rogue had a
trick of translating out of the shops as well as the languages.
_Scare_. But I am afraid I am not qualified for a translator, for
I understand no language but my own.
_Book_. What, and translate Virgil?
_Scare_. Alas! I translated him out of Dryden.
_Book_. Lay by your hat, sir--lay by your hat, and take your seat
immediately. Not qualified!--thou art as well versed in thy trade as
if thou hadst laboured in my garret these ten years. Let me tell you,
friend, you will have more occasion for invention than learning
here. You will be obliged to translate books out of all languages,
especially French, that were never printed in any language whatsoever.
_Scare_. Your trade abounds in mysteries.
_Book_. The study of bookselling is as difficult as the law: and
there are as many tricks in the one as the other. Sometimes we give a
foreign name to our own labours, and sometimes we put our names to the
labours of others. Then, as the lawyers have John-a-Nokes and
Tom-a-Stiles, so we have Messieurs Moore near St Paul's and Smith
near the Royal Exchange.